Yeeha and Sheeps advice corner

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Comments

  • joshtp
    joshtp Posts: 3,966
    :lol:
    I like bikes and stuff
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    oh yeah, sorry. i will do.
  • joshtp
    joshtp Posts: 3,966
    The Humility displayed by your great self, to stoop to my level, and answer my pitiful requests is truly incredible!

    Is there anything I can do for you, my liege?




    :wink::lol:
    I like bikes and stuff
  • El Capitano
    El Capitano Posts: 6,400
    Dear Geniuseseses,

    As I'm sure you're well aware, its Movember. I'm currently growing my "Mo", but the problem is the grey hair. I manage to hide the grey hair on my head with wet-look hair gel, but am struggling to hide the grey hairs in my Mo.

    Obviously, as this is for charity, I can't just shave it off. However I don't wish to appear to be the grey haired old man I actually am.

    Suggestions?
    1 2 3 4 (Dead)5 6
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    hmm tough one, no one wants to ruin their reputation.

    my advice is boot polish, that way not only will your moustache remain untinted by grey and you will be able to get it all nice and slick looking!!

    (lets ignore the fact that your face will stink of boot polish!!)
  • El Capitano
    El Capitano Posts: 6,400
    sheepsteeth wrote:
    hmm tough one, no one wants to ruin their reputation.

    my advice is boot polish, that way not only will your moustache remain untinted by grey and you will be able to get it all nice and slick looking!!

    (lets ignore the fact that your face will stink of boot polish!!)

    Thanks for the advice. I'm not worried about the smell of the polish, I'm rather fond of it - I can tell the difference between Cherry and Kiwi by taste...
    1 2 3 4 (Dead)5 6
  • montevideoguy
    montevideoguy Posts: 2,271
    Simple questions...

    Busta Rhymes or Eddy Gordo?

    And how?
    Formally known as Coatbridgeguy
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    Coatbridgeguy wrote:
    Simple questions...

    Busta Rhymes or Eddy Gordo?

    And how?
    Sorry man, I'd be stoked to offer any assistage, but I'm afraid there's a mondo problemo, dude. I don't speak foreign :?
  • montevideoguy
    montevideoguy Posts: 2,271
    Neither do I old bean
    Formally known as Coatbridgeguy
  • montevideoguy
    montevideoguy Posts: 2,271
    So now is it just Yeeha's advice corner?
    Formally known as Coatbridgeguy
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    Yes, yes it is, but I've not been online much.
    If, in some bizarre circumstances I should find myself NOT knowing the answer to something, I shall ask the Big D. himself.
  • bartimaeus
    bartimaeus Posts: 1,812
    A woman I have never met has foolishly asked for dating advice. Can you confirm that what she really needs is:

    the+third+man.jpg
    Ball-of-thick-string-007.jpg
    liver1-406-x-296.jpg
    Vitus Sentier VR+ (2018) GT Grade AL 105 (2016)
    Giant Anthem X4 (2010) GT Avalanche 1.0 (2010)
    Kingley Vale and QECP Trail Collective - QECP Trail Building
  • MountainMonster
    MountainMonster Posts: 7,423
    Man, everything is being brought back from the dead! Insane!

    But yes, that is what she needs. A nice little touch of Rophynol would be wise as well, for that extra special kick!
    My London Road
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    MountainMonster wrote:
    Man, everything is being brought back from the dead! Insane!

    But yes, that is what she needs. A nice little touch of Rophynol would be wise as well, for that extra special kick!
    Excuse me, who the fukk are you?
    Meh, I opened that advice thread, then realised it was 26 pages long or something, and thought, fukk it.
    Women only need one piece of advice in relationships. "THINK LESS"
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    yeehaamcgee wrote:
    MountainMonster wrote:
    Man, everything is being brought back from the dead! Insane!

    But yes, that is what she needs. A nice little touch of Rophynol would be wise as well, for that extra special kick!
    Excuse me, who the fukk are you?
    Meh, I opened that advice thread, then realised it was 26 pages long or something, and thought, fukk it.
    Women only need one piece of advice in relationships. "THINK LESS"

    The women on here couldn't think less if they tried.
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    Do you know any women at all? They overthink everything when it comes to a relationship.
    "he said I look cute, what do you think that means?"
    er, it means he thinks you're cute, that's it. Nothing more.
  • sheepsteeth
    sheepsteeth Posts: 17,418
    Bartimaeus wrote:
    A woman I have never met has foolishly asked for dating advice. Can you confirm that what she really needs is:

    the+third+man.jpg
    Ball-of-thick-string-007.jpg
    liver1-406-x-296.jpg

    nope, unusually for such a place, the only advice this person needs is to stop being a useless obvious, it makes her sound like a necessary, and not in a good way.
    Harry von Big Sticks
  • mak3m
    mak3m Posts: 1,394
    Well ive tried everywhere

    mtb beginners, mtb general, MTBUK, my LBS even Halfords but i still cant bring my wife to Org4sm !!!!

    sugestions???
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    The trouble is, your wife is getting satisfied by all manner of random men and boys, and in all likelihood, other women - usually stunning Sweedish blondes. (You should see nicklouse's Sweedish Blonde disguise, it really is very convincing). After all that action, she has no time for a mediocre performance from the likes of you.
    So, try and take her on a long long holiday in a very secluded place where there aren't any other people around AT ALL.
    After being there for two months or so, offer her some sweet lovin'. And do your best. If you still don't succeed, maybe you were never meant to satisfy women.
  • MountainMonster
    MountainMonster Posts: 7,423
    yeehaamcgee wrote:
    MountainMonster wrote:
    Man, everything is being brought back from the dead! Insane!

    But yes, that is what she needs. A nice little touch of Rophynol would be wise as well, for that extra special kick!
    Excuse me, who the fukk are you?
    Meh, I opened that advice thread, then realised it was 26 pages long or something, and thought, fukk it.
    Women only need one piece of advice in relationships. "THINK LESS"

    I know a few things other than "think less" they should do.

    Generally include the word more,followed by:

    cleaning
    high quality cooking
    high quality sex
    income brought into the family
    My London Road
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    Dude, seriously, read the thread title, and GTFO.
  • blister pus
    blister pus Posts: 5,610
    I have currently just eaten a plate of shepards pie but am due to go out for a ride in 30 minutes, i'm thinking i need a dump now, how do i hurry the whole dump process up so as i get to go , clean up, and be on time...

    go
  • sheepsteeth
    sheepsteeth Posts: 17,418
    what you need to do is get yourself in a headlock and squeeze as hard as you can,

    it may take a few minutes depending on how strong you are, i can normally beast a sh1t out of myself in less than 3 seconds by giving myself a headlock and squeezing dead hard.

    make sure you do it near to the toilet you would normally go in, the idea is to keep squeezing until the sh1t comes out, like squeezing toothpaste or primula or tomato paste.

    let us know how you get on and feel free to furnish me with a picture of the evidence.
    Harry von Big Sticks
  • sheepsteeth
    sheepsteeth Posts: 17,418
    yeehaamcgee wrote:
    Dude, seriously, read the thread title, and GTFO.

    big sticks, no messtins, sideways.
    Harry von Big Sticks
  • Kaise
    Kaise Posts: 2,498
    i have been lacking in motivation for work since some douche bag sat across from me stinking of BO and burping all the time. What are your suggests to solve this?
    :)Ragley Blue Pig
    :twisted: Spesh Demo 8 II
  • MountainMonster
    MountainMonster Posts: 7,423
    yeehaamcgee wrote:
    Dude, seriously, read the thread title, and GTFO.

    Another useless moment.

    I'm on track.

    Please advise me on best way to achieve my ambitious goals of Most Useless Member of the Forum this year?
    My London Road
  • sheepsteeth
    sheepsteeth Posts: 17,418
    kaiser83 wrote:
    i have been lacking in motivation for work since some douche bag sat across from me stinking of BO and burping all the time. What are your suggests to solve this?

    dont sit in front of the mirror

    aaah thankeeyouoo :wink:
    Harry von Big Sticks
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    blister pus wrote:
    I have currently just eaten a plate of shepards pie but am due to go out for a ride in 30 minutes, i'm thinking i need a dump now, how do i hurry the whole dump process up so as i get to go , clean up, and be on time...

    go

    Just do this, saves time.............................


    81439473.gif
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,666
    :roll:
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    yeehaamcgee wrote:
    :roll:



    evarky.gif
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."

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