Yeeha and Sheeps advice corner
whyamihere
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Ask here, and their combined wisdom will help you find the solution to your problem!
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From the other thread:Cat With No Tail wrote:Dear Yeeha and Sheeps,
I have a problem and would like your advice.
I have a bag, a jar, and some string, but no limes. Shops are closed as it's sunday.
What do you suggest?0 -
hmm, quite a conundrum, im sure i can speak for us both when i say that you could use a bottle of jif perhaps?0
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Or maybe a ping pong ball, or a kinder surprise. It would certainly bring a new meaning to the surprise.0
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I have a very large splinter in my toe from my decking, hows the best method of removing it? :?0
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yeehaamcgee wrote:Or maybe a ping pong ball, or a kinder surprise. It would certainly bring a new meaning to the surprise.
Thanks, I couldn't decide between the ping-pong ball, kinder surprise, or Jiff, so I used all 3.
Great advice guys, cheers.0 -
Now that answer should be obvious to everyone.forcutty wrote:I have a very large splinter in my toe from my decking, hows the best method of removing it? :?
Get a lime.
Get some string.
Tie one of of the string to the lime.
Shove the lime up your obvious.
Sit with your legs bent, so your feet are touching in front of you.
Tie the other end of the string to the splinter.
Tug away like a man possessed, and at the moment of glory, your legs will straighten pulling both the lime from your obvious, and the splinter from your toe.
Simples.
Or, just cut off the toe. Who needs toes anyway.0 -
nice work there yeehaa, inspired even.
the best way i find to remove a splinter is not to remove the splinter, but remove your body from it instead so, chop your toe off with a hammer.0 -
Or just psyche the splinter out of course. If you're manly enough it will soon realise what it's got itself into and leave of it's own accord.0
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how is baby come from ????
:):) 0 -
Grondel wrote:how is baby come from ????:):)
you know your mum?
she did it with your dad and god punished her by making her preggers.
the baby physically grows in the small of a ladies back and the bump at the front is all of the ladies guilt. the baby actually comes out of a ladies bumhole.
hope this helps fella.0 -
this is genius
Just wondering if I'm all out of pig's liver is there any alternative meats you would care to suggest0 -
fyldesmurf wrote:this is genius
Just wondering if I'm all out of pig's liver is there any alternative meats you would care to suggest
tis another real dilema and is the very reason this thread is here.
in lieu of liver the best thing to use is carefully filletted mackeral with the skin stil on, arrange the fillets so the flesh is against the coffee jar and the skins are facing inwards.
you will get the natural feel associated with the pig liver as the mackeral is an oily fish plus you get the authentic "smells like rick steins kitchen bin" experience normally associated with girls from chatham.0 -
I was just wondering hyperthetically of course, what would be the best way to get rid of a dead body?0
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sheepsteeth wrote:fyldesmurf wrote:this is genius
Just wondering if I'm all out of pig's liver is there any alternative meats you would care to suggest
tis another real dilema and is the very reason this thread is here.
in lieu of liver the best thing to use is carefully filletted mackeral with the skin stil on, arrange the fillets so the flesh is against the coffee jar and the skins are facing inwards.
you will get the natural feel associated with the pig liver as the mackeral is an oily fish plus you get the authentic "smells like rick steins kitchen bin" experience normally associated with girls from chatham.
What do chatham girls use for protection during sex...A bus shelter
Whats the most confusing day in chatham...Fathers day0 -
El Capitano wrote:I was just wondering hyperthetically of course, what would be the best way to get rid of a dead body?
interesting you should ask a man who trains people in the methods for finding such things.
first thing you wanna do is cut the body up into small pieces, you should have 10 pieces and a bag full of guts and offal.
feed the lot to some pigs. burn the shitt. wash the ash down your neigbour's sink.
make sure you are seen in public telling the person who owns the body what a good bloke you think he is first of course0 -
Or failing that, break into a crematorium or funeral home, and hide the cut up body pieces in another coffin.
There's an added thrill to this method, in that you'll be wondering for a short while afterwards whether it was an open-coffin funeral or not.
Crematorium is best, obviously, cause the evidence is destroyed for you.0 -
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gah you forgot the string? get a fork and claw it out
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nope. it slipped offMynameisdann wrote:gah you forgot the string? get a fork and claw it out
. i did try that but it's just too deep 0 -
Seeing as you two are the most qualified please could we have a definate answer on HT vs FS0
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While we're at it, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he could be arsed? And who would win in a fight between a woodchuck and a beaver?0
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psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
God! You don't need to bother those guys with that....try "elephant tube"
I'm going to Pembrokeshire tomorrow, should I use A483, or A494. Please help as I cannot decide.0 -
Suspended rear, rigid front. The more travel at the rear the better. And is has to have gears, but a fixed freehub so you can't freewheel.fyldesmurf wrote:Seeing as you two are the most qualified please could we have a definate answer on HT vs FS
But, failing that, full suss, OBVIOUSLY! :roll:0 -
Really? Really really?psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
If you really want, I'll PM you. There is an amazing place for free online "jazz" where you can pretty much ask for anything you want and it will be provided.0 -
It's a little known fact that Chuck Norris was a woodchuck. That's actually where he got his name from. Norris is obviously the family name, which he got given from his father on his 7th birthday.Stav83 wrote:While we're at it, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he could be arsed? And who would win in a fight between a woodchuck and a beaver?
His father was Slow Norris.
The young Dwayne "Chuck" Norris, on his father's lap, at age 26
Annoyed by his father's limited velocity, and subsequent embarrasment at father/son races in school sportsdays, young Dwayne Norris vowed to become the fastest, most dangerous creature ever to walk the face of the earth.
He realised that the only way to train sufficiently to achieve his goal, was to bunk off school and find work as a woodchuck. He soon set many woodchucking records, and earned the name "chuck" Norris.
Funnily enough, the question of who would win in a fight between a woodchuck and a beaver can never be answered, due to the near godlike respect between the two species. In order to become a demi-god, Dwayne learnt a lot from the beavers. Meanwhile, the beavers, who had evolved over more than 30 years to manipulate trees and wood, had such respect that someone from another species could attain such incredible talents as a woodchuck, that they all bowed down in honour.
But, the short answer, the world's best woodchuck could chuck a metric fuckton of wood per minute.
Whereas your average woodchuck could only manage about a single metric ton per hour.0 -
yeehaamcgee wrote:
Really? Really really?psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
If you really want, I'll PM you. There is an amazing place for free online "jazz" where you can pretty much ask for anything you want and it will be provided.
Has if got much to do with some kind of exquiste red shelled, claw wielding, water based animal?0 -
Yeehaa... I wont quote all of that, but man, thats just had me laughing so loud!
You Sir, are a genius
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Humm i got a good one ! if u had no string, no limes and no feet what would you do ?? 8)2010 Orange Crush Custom
http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=10017&t=127158480
