Corrupt a Wish

johnnyboy29

You now have more holidays than judith charmers but now your an quadrapleagic agraphobic.



I wish all my house work was done....

IcarusGreen

You housework is all done but the only property you own is a dolls house.

I wish my boardman fs team would finally turn up tomorrow as promised after 3 months of waiting

fred1star

Chris Boardman hears of your bike troubles and takes the time to deliver your new bike personally. Unfortunately your girlfriend catches an eye of Chris’s huge thighs and realises she is missing something and runs off with Chris and your new bike you have waited so long for. Your mates rib you endlessly as your bird ran off with a roadie… well trackie really…. You put a complaint into Halfords but as usual your complaints fall on deaf ears.

I wish I did not have to go to work tomorrow

Hercule Q

you have the day off because youve been fired and due to the hot weather the trails are closed because of fire risks

Hercule Q

i wish i'd stop forgetting to put my wish up

ramemtbers

you manage to remember to put up your wish but the game is shut down because it takesup to much memory

i wish my head set would stop coming loose

johnnyboy29

Your hedset is now so tight it will never move again nor will any of your steering mech.

I wish i had a better bike..

fred1star

Chris Boardman feeling guilty for nabbing Icarusgreen’s girlfriend wanted to make amends. He see’s your post and decides to give you the bike of your dreams. You now have the best bike ever and you take it for a ride. You ride out to your local trail where local tw@ts see you and decide they want your bike. You blast it off only to come face to face with chuck norris who also wants your bike. Feeling a little inferior to the norris you decide to play dirty and point behind him, look over their you say, the norris falls for it and looks around. You kick him in the family jewels and beat it while thanking homer simpson for the escape tip…. All this exercise on the new bike is new to you and the build up of lactic acid in your muscles takes its toll. You begin to cramp up and you slow down, the norris, now recovered from the underhand tactics you employed to disable him catches up with you. He is pi@@ed off, well pi@@ed off. He rips off your head and sh@ts down the hole…. Your better bike not helping you now he mutters as he walks off in the distance with your new bike.

I wish I didn't have such a vivid imagination

MarkEo

Wish granted but now your dull ans boring so no1 wants to talk to you any more bye bye!
I wish my bike was finished!

thekickingmule

Your bike gets finished, but then a cat comes along that looks all cute and hungry, so you pick it up to take it home and feed it. Once home it munches everything you give it, then it lies on your lap, and you both fall asleep. When you awake, you realise the cat has clawed your eyeballs out, and that now you are completely blind, so the bike has to go.

I wish I had money to complete my bike build!

MarkEo

You get the money to complete your bike build off of your mum n dad but then a couple of weeks later a couple of heavies come aknocking at your door asking for the money your mum n dad borrowed of them, turns out they borrowed money off of the mafia and because you cant pay it back the heavies take your knee caps home with them. . . bye bye bike riding days
i wish i was a little bit taller, i wish i was a baller....

stuart_c-2

You are now taller, but your bike is now too small for you and no longer fun to ride.

I wish my eyesight wasn't so bad........

lawman

your eyesight iosnt so bad, but the world is destroyed so there is nothing to see

i wish the trails would stay dry alll year round

JonasTheHobbit

The trails are dry all year round due to a severe drought, water is in short supply so you cannot rehydrate therefore cannot hit the trails!
The UK enforces a hose pipe ban as a fix (inventive!!!). people's lawns start to die and rioting starts due to this..
all forms of excercise (ALL!!!!) are outlawed as a way of conserving water!

I wish Rachel Bilson, Isla Fisher and Megan Fox wanted a foursome with me!

Fully

You get to kenya next week, the long rains have come early. Torrential rain and flooding brings the country to it's knees. To compound things, there is a coup and martial law is declared. You are taken hostage by Kikuyu rebels who are high on khat, they use you as there 'plaything'. Six weeks later, the rebellion is quashed by government troops, the wet season is over and you are sent to Gt yarmouth to recover.

I wish i had the rest of the summer riding in the Alps.

Fully

I also wish that i had seen the other replies to this thread before posting at least 7 posts too late :oops:

MarkEo

your wish is granted but it is also to late because every1 who was reading and replying has grown old and died

I wish, i wish upon a star

thekickingmule

You make a wish upon the star, but, you then notice it's getting larger. The star enters the atmosphere, where it burns up, and shrinks by huge amounts, to about roughly the size of you. It then squishes you into the ground, like a grape under a brick.

I wish i could remember what I said I would do tonight :?

cat_with_no_tail

You remember what you said you would do tonight. Unfortunately though you were planning to go dogging with Pat Butcher :shock:

I wish my finger wasnt so bloody sore.

MarkEo

Wish granted, but in order to fix tour finger all the nerves in your body have to be removed (you may think this is a good thing not feeling pain and all) but now you dont feel pain you start to feel invinsible and start jumping bigger n bigger n higher and higher until eventually you go to far and to high, you hit a tree and split your self in half, and thats the end of you

I wish i new what to wish for

stuart_c-2

Wish granted. You want to wish for 10 million pounds, but you can't have it cos you used up your wish wanting to know what to wish for.

I wish the job I was going for was for a bit more money

MarkEo

Wish granted, you get a brilliant wage but the job has a hidden clause that involves some after work ''fun'' with the boss every night and your left with a sore arse which means you cant ride your bike coz it hurts to much

I wish i wasn't bored

cat_with_no_tail

You are not bored, you are in bed with Anne Widdecombe and she wants you to go "down town baby"

I wish there was something decent to eat here instead of the same old sandwiches

xstrathyx

you find something nice to eat, but sadly Anne Widdecombe has sat on it (unlucky)

wish i had thought long and hard about buying my first MTB in years and went in heavy on the buying!

JonasTheHobbit

xSTRATHYx wrote:

you find something nice to eat, but sadly Anne Widdecombe has sat on it (unlucky)

wish i had thought long and hard about buying my first MTB in years and went in heavy on the buying!

Granted, you think long and hard and you still have no bike!!!

i wish all the presenters on Galaxy 105 would shut the f**k up!

cat_with_no_tail

All the presenters on Galaxy 105 do stfu, only to be replaced by Joe Pasquale singing "I know a song that'll get on yer nerves....." and Barry Scott shouting "BANG! and the dirt is gone" over and over.

Edit: Oh, and the guy off the advert selling double glazing, you know the one "Call 0800 10**07, I SAY CALL 0800 10**07 NOOOW" :twisted:

I wish I hadnt eaten all that Chicken Rogan Josh at lunch.

Mickey Eye

Wish granted, you have now eaten all that lamb rogan josh.

I wish that the weather for the next 2 weeks would be mild and rain a little bit less.

MarkEo

Granted, it is mild and rains a little less but it still rains, just not the heavy kool kind of rain its that fine drizzly rain that 'soaks you right through'

I wish i had a better come back than that last 1 ^^^ :oops:

Chaz.Harding

MarkEo wrote:

Granted, it is mild and rains a little less but it still rains, just not the heavy kool kind of rain its that fine drizzly rain that 'soaks you right through'

I wish i had a better come back than that last 1 ^^^ :oops:

You totally flame his wish, so hard, and so offensively, that everyone reading it is physically sick, and you get thrown off BikeRadar, and thrown into prison with the 'special' inmates... :shock:

I wish my back wasn't so bloody painfull!

snotty badger

You back is now tip top, however it hurts in your special place so much you cut it off with a rusty hacksaw.


I wish for nothing