Yeeha and Sheeps advice corner
Comments
-
Guys I need help, what's the easiest way to murder my grandmother and get away with it, failing that how hard is it to get someone secitoned?0
-
Laurence25 wrote:Humm i got a good one ! if u had no string, no limes and no feet what would you do ?? 8)
what you need is a fist and a surgeon.
get the surgeon to remove 4 of your lower ribs so you can bend right down.
stick your fist up your obvious then pull it out at the moment when your legs go straight. cover your hand in rock salt first though, there's a good lad.0 -
what? What the hell are you on about, man!north-sure wrote:yeehaamcgee wrote:
Really? Really really?psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
If you really want, I'll PM you. There is an amazing place for free online "jazz" where you can pretty much ask for anything you want and it will be provided.
Has if got much to do with some kind of exquiste red shelled, claw wielding, water based animal?0 -
sheepsteeth wrote:Laurence25 wrote:Humm i got a good one ! if u had no string, no limes and no feet what would you do ?? 8)
what you need is a fist and a surgeon.
get the surgeon to remove 4 of your lower ribs so you can bend right down.
stick your fist up your obvious then pull it out at the moment when your legs go straight. cover your hand in rock salt first though, there's a good lad.
Hahaha
this has made my day thanks Sheepstheeth 2010 Orange Crush Custom
http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=10017&t=127158480 -
-
yeehaamcgee wrote:
what? What the hell are you on about, man!north-sure wrote:yeehaamcgee wrote:
Really? Really really?psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
If you really want, I'll PM you. There is an amazing place for free online "jazz" where you can pretty much ask for anything you want and it will be provided.
Has if got much to do with some kind of exquiste red shelled, claw wielding, water based animal?
Lobsters
They provide some exquiste jazz, but also some of that experimental jazz that only real freaks like!0 -
woodnut wrote:psymon wrote:im in the mood for a BIG nobody in the house wank.
know any good "jazz" websites.
God! You don't need to bother those guys with that....try "elephant tube"
I'm going to Pembrokeshire tomorrow, should I use A483, or A494. Please help as I cannot decide.
494, no question.0 -
Easiest, as in lest effort, least haunting memories, or least likely of getting caught?ouchthathurts wrote:Guys I need help, what's the easiest way to murder my grandmother and get away with it, failing that how hard is it to get someone secitoned?
Getting somebody sectioned is easy. Just add some magic mushrooms into as many of their kitchen ingredients as you can. They'll soon get locked up when they proclaim to be the king of the dandyflowers, and run about flapping their arms and asking people where their nostrils have gone and why are their feet stuck to the marshmallows.0 -
laurence25, you are welcome, this is why we are here.
everyone else, dont forget there are only 2 people who can offer advice in here, the 2 wisest sages of them all, me and yeehaa.
all other advice is mental.0 -
What's that got to do with porn?north-sure wrote:Lobsters
They provide some exquiste jazz, but also some of that experimental jazz that only real freaks like!0 -
Alot incidentally! It's a site i use from time to time! I laughed the first time i heard it mentioned, but recently decided to check it out. Not bad!0
-
8) Ok then, One more question, Say the world is going to explode in an hours time but all you had with you is Rachel Atherton a lime on a string and a match-box . oh and you are locked in a room . what happens next ??? 2010 Orange Crush Custom
http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=10017&t=127158480 -
ouchthathurts wrote:Guys I need help, what's the easiest way to murder my grandmother and get away with it, failing that how hard is it to get someone secitoned?
easiest way is a lime down the old throat to chike her to death then get a woodchipper hired form a hire shop in the name of your neighbour, then chop her up whilst wearing a mask of your neighbours face (incase anyone sees you), then sit at home and wait for him to get back from work.
he will deffo fone the police when he gets home and sees his garden coverred in a film of human remains, guaranteed. but they will assume it is a ploy: the old "oh no, there has been a murder, i deffo didnt do it cause im phoning up about it so it couldnt have been me" sketch.
a little investigation on their part will show he hired the chipper, hey presto, he did it.0 -
All hell breaks loose. This might not be a "family" section of the forum, but still, I don't think I'd be allowed to explain the outcome of that scenario.Laurence25 wrote: 8) Ok then, One more question, Say the world is going to explode in an hours time but all you had with you is Rachel Atherton a lime on a string and a match-box . oh and you are locked in a room . what happens next ???0 -
Well I .... don't no what to say2010 Orange Crush Custom
http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=10017&t=127158480 -
Laurence25 wrote: 8) Ok then, One more question, Say the world is going to explode in an hours time but all you had with you is Rachel Atherton a lime on a string and a match-box . oh and you are locked in a room . what happens next ???
tricky. i would leave rachel alone, i love her so much, i would treat her to a demo of th old lime up the obvious sketch in the hope she falls in love with me during her last hour on earth. but if this wasnt possible, i would use my bomb disposal skills to stop the world from blowing up, rachel will fall in love with me, job done
(then id shove a lime up her)0 -
NOW THATS WT I WAS LOOKING FOR ! sheepsteeth you have impressed me yet again I will now leave and think about this evenings events. . . . .2010 Orange Crush Custom
http://www.bikeradar.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=10017&t=127158480 -
Ah, sheeps, you innocent little religiously raised boy. Bless.
What if, it was your grand master of bomb hiding ninja training that had hidden the bomb? Do you think you could still find it? Would the pupil become the master?0 -
yeehaamcgee wrote:Ah, sheeps, you innocent little religiously raised boy. Bless.
What if, it was your grand master of bomb hiding ninja training that had hidden the bomb? Do you think you could still find it? Would the pupil become the master?
a question from the answerer, this is an exciting turn and a good question, well presented:
if it can be found, i can find it, no question. i teach them everything they know, not everything I know
0 -
Ah, but surely your master did the same?0
-
Well if I had broken, and told you my version of events, then you would be a gibbering wreck by now.Laurence25 wrote:NOW THATS WT I WAS LOOKING FOR ! sheepsteeth you have impressed me yet again I will now leave and think about this evenings events. . . . .
Which, funnily enough demonstrates another way of getting somebody sectioned.0 -
yeehaamcgee wrote:Ah, but surely your master did the same?
this was true until i taught at the school, now i hold all of the cards.0 -
Ah! you ARE the master.0
-
yeehaamcgee wrote:Ah! you ARE the master.
very true (ish)0 -
Master baiter?0
-
yeehaamcgee wrote:Master baiter?
i havent today but normally very yes.0 -
So, in a complely unrelated question, would you know the best place to purchase a herd of pigs from?0
-
El Capitano wrote:So, in a complely unrelated question, would you know the best place to purchase a herd of pigs from?
buy them from a long way away (under the name of your neighbour of course)0 -
From a cattlemarket. Don't let the name put you off. They have pigs there too.El Capitano wrote:So, in a complely unrelated question, would you know the best place to purchase a herd of pigs from?
Your typical Saturday night cattle market will do (Octagon in Bangor, Whispers in Cardiff).
You need to approach the bouncers, and ask the secret phrase...
"Do bananas hang from your rectum, or are you just a screaming homo".
IF they know of the secret piggy goings on, they will then take you downstairs to the trading floor.
But, due to a miss-translation* in EU law, each pig must be paid for in a beating (a pounding if you will).
Incidentally, did you know that the winner of miss-translation 2006, 2008, and 1853, was Nanette Newman.0 -
Again, in a completely unrelated post, nothing to do with any previous ones; If I was to say have a herd of 10 pigs, just how much bacon could I make from them and would you like a bacon sandwich? 0
