Silly commuting racing

Bassjunkieuk

Glad to have you back DDD!

Being from the same neck of the woods (and avoiding any geeky comic humor!) I can say that the lovely stretch of road that links Norbury, Streatham and Brixton, aka the A23, is indeed a fun scalping ground!

The bus lane that runs along it offers space to have a proper battle and enough room to take a wide pass on the occasions where gravity can assist! This of course is offset by the fact those horrid 2 wheel petrol powered bikes are allowed in the bus lane and the endless number of drivers who think the bus lane is an extension of the giveway line!

greg66_tri_v2.0

Nothing very exciting for me this morning. Swept by a couple of pacey roadies but they either wouldn't or (more likely :twisted: ) couldn't give chase.

More annoying were the Obstacles Placed In My Path. First was on the approach to Pt Sq - three lanes and I'm dead centre of the l/hand lane, which is empty and the lights are green. Now obviously, as I take the r/hander into the Sq I'm going to cut to apex of the bend and get close to the kerb. Except that's not so obvious to the retarded scooter rider who tries to undertake me on my left (ie between me & the kerb) on the bloody apex itself! I managed to spot him just in time and push the door closed enough to block him, then decided to ride like an utter a-hole round the rest of the square blocking him. Quite satisfying, as he didn't get by until the run to Westminster Bridge.

Which is where obstacles nos 2 and 3 were. I'm approaching the l/hander back onto the Embankment on the r/hand side of the left filter lane - overtaking the traffic and lining up to go right around the outside of the l/hander. Done well, this will avoid the metalwork in the road and polish the toes of the shoes of any peds standing on the island in the road. However... this morning I come round to see two cyclists who have turned right coming off the bridge, standing still waiting to filter into the traffic, and right in my line. They are both watching the traffic rather than spotting me, and start to move forward at about the last possible moment to open the gap for me to go behind them (riding into the empty second/third lanes on the Embankment). Then they spot me and freeze like scaredy rabbits, leaving me about 18 inches between their rear wheels and the island in the road to dart through. A not-so-sotto voce "to$$ers" was hurled their way.

So, arrived in a not very good mood today. Why is everyone out to get me, I wonder :?

DonDaddyD

Bassjunkieuk wrote:

Glad to have you back DDD!

Thank you

Being from the same neck of the woods (and avoiding any geeky comic humor!)

Ah shoot! I was gonna bring the quippy with a remark about us being like Daredevil and Spider-man having overlapping innercity territories...

I can say that the lovely stretch of road that links Norbury, Streatham and Brixton, aka the A23, is indeed a fun scalping ground!

It is arguably the best (and worst - due to traffic and the socio-mentality of most drivers) stretch of road in South London next to Clapham High street leading to Clapham Common, onto Balham then Tooting and finally Wimbledon. On a good day there are just dead-spots for brilliant sprints on the A23 where there is hardly any wind and the tarmac is super hard and promisingly flat, such as: Norbury train station to De Ver Cycles, Go Karting to Streatham Train Station. Odeon to Christ Church and once your in Brixton passed the tube station its open season on the cranks.

The bus lane that runs along it offers space to have a proper battle and enough room to take a wide pass on the occasions where gravity can assist!

Is it me or are the bus lanes huge :shock: on this road and yet somehow and some way there is less space for vehicles than anywhere else in London?

Wrath Rob

Glad to hear you are all OK, it sounds like we all had an interesting morning. Maybe the planets had aligned against us? Hopefully they will have shifted by 5.15 so I can get off in good time to get to my Italian lesson tonight.

CJCP, you, however, have sinned and seriously gone down in my estimation. Your pennance shall be to be consigned to a 3 gear Brompton for a week, with a Sam Browne belt and a wicker basket containing a small terrier on the front. And the people shall mock you :twisted:

Clever Pun

Wrath Rob wrote:

Glad to hear you are all OK, it sounds like we all had an interesting morning. Maybe the planets had aligned against us? Hopefully they will have shifted by 5.15 so I can get off in good time to get to my Italian lesson tonight.

CJCP, you, however, have sinned and seriously gone down in my estimation. Your pennance shall be to be consigned to a 3 gear Brompton for a week, with a Sam Browne belt and a wicker basket containing a small terrier on the front. And the people shall mock you :twisted:

and a nice fleecy blanket

lost_in_thought

Greg66 wrote:

So, arrived in a not very good mood today. Why is everyone out to get me, I wonder :?

In exactly the same mood this morning, seems there was a liberal coating of tw@ts all arouind London today.

Have been to the gym and am now feeling less grumpy, but my shoulder, arm and hip are starting that 'we're getting some bruises' dull ache from this morning's collision.

Effing scooter. I'm going to hunt him down and slash his tyres. :twisted:

Greg T

cjcp wrote:

A minor correction: it was a hybrid. Minor because I view them as the same.

Shut it you Slag!

Listen Sun shine, you're not giving me that lip about MTBs and Hybrids are same, you must think we were born yesterday. You, my son, are looking at long stretch in he Scrubs and I'm not crying no tears for you - you low life filth.

The quicker we get your sort off the streets the better.

Carter throw this villain in the cells and down the stairs - then Pub.

cjcp

Wrath Rob wrote:

Glad to hear you are all OK, it sounds like we all had an interesting morning. Maybe the planets had aligned against us? Hopefully they will have shifted by 5.15 so I can get off in good time to get to my Italian lesson tonight.

CJCP, you, however, have sinned and seriously gone down in my estimation. Your pennance shall be to be consigned to a 3 gear Brompton for a week, with a Sam Browne belt and a wicker basket containing a small terrier on the front. And the people shall mock you :twisted:

I see this young upstart is becoming feisty. A 5.15pm departure tonight, eh? How convenient. :twisted:

Wrath Rob

Blue t-shirt, black 3/4s, black boardman, florescent ruck sack, red/white helmet.

I'll see you in 30 mins.

However, you can only loose, old man, as you are above me in the chain. I however, have everything to win :twisted:

cjcp

Wrath Rob wrote:

Blue t-shirt, black 3/4s, black boardman, florescent ruck sack, red/white helmet.

I'll see you in 30 mins.

However, you can only loose, old man, as you are above me in the chain. I however, have everything to win :twisted:

Not tonight you won't. I'll be leaving just before 6pm, just before your bedtime I think.

That's right, I am higher in the food chain than you. I'll tap you on the shoulder and remind of that when I pull up alongside before leaving to you count the number of green panels on my rucksack before I tear off into the distance. That'll leave you clutching your teddy in bed that night, young one. :twisted:

attica

This should be televised

EDIT:- Damn, posted too late

Greg T

cjcp wrote:

That'll leave you clutching your teddy in bed that night, young one. :twisted:

That's mighty big Talk for someone who got done by by a MTB / pogo stick this morning.....

Wrath Rob

Pride comes before the fall

What we need is a safe circuit, i.e. not the normal London commute, where we can do a proper race or time trial. Some Statto out there could work out the time handicap over the course based on your FCN, we race, then retire to the pub to celebrate/commiserate. If you really wanted to get into it you could have an officially adjusted FCN, e.g. if you are officially a 9 but complete the TT at the level of a 6 then the FCN committee could issue an adjustment...

Just musing!

cjcp

Attica wrote:

This should be televised

EDIT:- Damn, posted too late

Good idea. I'll carry a camera.

Bassjunkieuk

Wrath Rob wrote:

Pride comes before the fall

What we need is a safe circuit, i.e. not the normal London commute, where we can do a proper race or time trial. Some Statto out there could work out the time handicap over the course based on your FCN, we race, then retire to the pub to celebrate/commiserate. If you really wanted to get into it you could have an officially adjusted FCN, e.g. if you are officially a 9 but complete the TT at the level of a 6 then the FCN committee could issue an adjustment...

Just musing!

I'm sure someone suggested this at the last drinks I attended, basically a TT race on the Embankment :-) To be fair it would need to take in the whole stretch but not to sure about turning around as the haphazard turn in the road they implemented for the freewheel at Tower Hill was just to slow!

itboffin

cjcp wrote:

Attica wrote:

This should be televised

EDIT:- Damn, posted too late

Good idea. I'll carry a camera.

has anyone actually taken a picture either before or after claiming a scalp?

il_principe

No but it'd be hilarious, no hands scalp holding the camera, say "cheese" as you pass.

cjcp

itboffin wrote:

cjcp wrote:

Attica wrote:

This should be televised

EDIT:- Damn, posted too late

Good idea. I'll carry a camera.

has anyone actually taken a picture either before or after claiming a scalp?

I haven't. Shutter speeds aren't fast enough.

Feltup

Can I offer a new bit of etiquette? I call this the Lance Armstrong pass.

As you pass your scalp it is just good manners to look them in the eye and smile. This not only shows that you are not trying too hard but also will iritate the hell out of them

attica

cjcp wrote:

Good idea. I'll carry a camera.

3/4 hour head start and you still reckon on catching him? wow, that's going some/wow, he must be slow.

Good luck to you both, I'm looking forward to the video on you tube tomorrow

itboffin

Has anyone heard from VL at all, he seems to have disappeared.

Bassjunkieuk

Had an annoying little oik on his MTB on the way home today, I'm sure I passed him yesterday around the same area aswell.............

He was wearing headphones and RLJ/pavement riding so there was no way I could claim a scalp but as it was fairly spartan of other riders and his nefarious tactics meant he was ahead of me I thought sod it I'm gonna take him!

Bllew past him in Morden (I think I've changed the route recently!) only for him to RLJ at the next set I stopped at, brushing my arm as he passed! When the lights went green I sprinted off and got ahead in the traffic and being a brave soul decided to filter down the middle of the traffic, knowing he'd never be able to follow on his wide bar halfords special!
The sneaky bugger filtered down the right of all the traffic then through a gap between a bus and van that I wasn't gonna chance as I wasn't carrying enough speed, I hung back and made it through on the next opening and then followed him down the left. Again he hops onto the pavement as the busy road is obviously to scary for him! Rounded the corner heading towards Mitcham and put the hammer down, he couldn't have matched me if he wanted to! He was still dawdling on the pavement, now with his phone out - presumably texting his boyfriend or something :-D

Wrath Rob

Well, no televised antics tonight, and given that the wind tunnel had been upped to level 5 it was probably just as well. However, I do believe that earth has been invaded by the Klingon empire as they were out in force today. I wouldn't mind too much but being the selfish alien scum that they are they never take their turn at the front. At least try!

I need a James Bond box'o'tricks on the back of the bike to spew oil or tacks onto the road to deter them

CJCP, I promise I'd leave it at home for when we finally meet up

DiggingDeeper

The Game : I can now put all that I have previously felt into context. Thanks

I have churned my way thro a considerable number of pages on the forum to try and get abreast of what the style is (very amusing mostly). I don't think any of you are in my manor but you never know.

I have decided to up my game as a result and the hills (we are talking London I realise) are getting better attention from me now. Times are tumblin and points will be coming my way.

Grey Trek mostly, watch your backs safety glances only.........

girv73

Feltup wrote:

As you pass your scalp it is just good manners to look them in the eye and smile. This not only shows that you are not trying too hard but also will iritate the hell out of them

I always do this anyway, for the few that I can pass at least

Kieran_Burns

Feltup wrote:

Can I offer a new bit of etiquette? I call this the Lance Armstrong pass.

As you pass your scalp it is just good manners to look them in the eye and smile. This not only shows that you are not trying too hard but also will iritate the hell out of them

I'd like to do that. I really would. My only concern is that I would simply cough up a load of phlegm into the poor sods face as I tried the cheery "Hi!" :oops:

I really need to get fitter.... :roll:

DonDaddyD

girv73 wrote:

Feltup wrote:

As you pass your scalp it is just good manners to look them in the eye and smile. This not only shows that you are not trying too hard but also will iritate the hell out of them

I always do this anyway, for the few that I can pass at least

Sometimes When I pass someone who has put up a worthy battle or has made me work (20mph and above) I actually say rather loudly SCALP! But make it sound more like Ssssccccaaaallllp!

Does anyone else do this or am I taking the 'game I don't play' too far?

I've been stared at as I've been overtaken. Back in the summer I was heading from Clapham South to Tooting Bec I gunned it and passed many a roady and at least 2 single speeds. I was overjoyed and preoccupied with thoughts about bragging in this thread as soon as I got home. However, I hit the wall as the first set of lights didn't go red and as the single speed caught up to me to reclaim his scalp he made sure to look at every inch of my bike my backpack and me as he rode pass. I hold my head in shame.....

cjcp

Wrath Rob wrote:

Well, no televised antics tonight, and given that the wind tunnel had been upped to level 5 it was probably just as well. However, I do believe that earth has been invaded by the Klingon empire as they were out in force today. I wouldn't mind too much but being the selfish alien scum that they are they never take their turn at the front. At least try!

Yep, a lot of people seemed to have lost their way home last night and wanted me to show them the way. Had to get a wiggle on after Death Star Canyon.

However, the mojo is officially back in the building*. Which must have been a little disheartening for the chap in the Porsche 911 I blew by**. It seemed he was restricted to 32mph :twisted:

* the return of one's mojo also seems to coincide with the return of one's tyre pressure. It was at 50psi on the rear and 60 at the front. <shakes his head, wondering how he even manages to get dressed in the morning>

** I "blew by" in the sense that I was doing 1mph more than him.

cjcp

By the way, saw a bike go into the back of a cab last night. Didn't see the events leading up to it, but there were a good few other bikes around so there's the potential for more bikes to be involved in such an incident. A timely reminder that when there's a few bikes around and it's dark and the road's a bit slippy, we all need to give each other more room.

Clever Pun

Heading towards elmers end last night I saw a roadie in full kit & cap possibly an old boy as I got closer I could see the catford cycle club top... potential prize scalp this.

I continue to gain, his left leg looks shiny and as I'm within distance I realise it's a falsey :shock: The dude is essentially cycling with only one calf potentially one thigh (didn't seen that much) so as I go past I smile say hello and go on my way

so is that a scalp? I didn't want to take it, but he would want me to I'm sure

There's been no rules about lack of limbs