Kitty & Bint's 'Grill the Gash' Thread

foxc_uk

kaiser83 wrote:

bicyclepirate wrote:

Ok I need some advice.....

My long term girlfriend has moved to Norfolk for work and wants me to go to. I hate Norfolk it has no hills and is like 100 miles from anywhere good. I have a good job here (Nottingham) that I worked hard to get, If I move to Norfolk I'll be taking a 10k pay cut. Do I stay or go? Isn't it easier to get a new gf? I just can't make my mind up.

Help please

is this even a question? its not my place to answer as this isnt my thread but i can guess what the ladies will say!

How easy will it be for you to find work?
Does she get paid more than you?

I think you can see where I'm going here.

On the other hand - how long have you been together?
Have you lived together?
Did she discuss it with you before moving?

Edited because I'm a muppet and just realised he already said she moved for work.

fungus_the_muffin_man

ol\'gregg wrote:

Dear ladies.

Over the last few months my girlfriend has been waking up every now and again in a foul mood has a go at me and ignores me for an hour then things slowly get back to normal.
I have recently found out that I have been what she calls a 'dream cheat' where i have been cheating on her in her dreams with all manner of lady, thus causing said outbursts.

What's the deal with that??

Now I'm no girl, but when this happens it's can some times be because the one doing the dreaming is actually doing the cheating ..........

bicyclepirate

I'll be able to work in Norfolk but I'll lose out in a big way, I've worked pretty hard for the last six years and done quite well.

We both earn roughly the same I'm an engineer she's a vet.

We've lived together before, then about three years ago she moved to Norfolk to work for a charity or a while. I was pretty supportive and she eventually moved back to Nottingham, she had a few jobs over about 18 months and didn't enjoy them so she decided to move back to Norwich and work for a charity again.

Tbh, I'm leaning towards breaking up, but I saw this advice column and thought it might help to get some other opinions!

Lay it on me, what should I do?

Edit: I think I basically just want someone to tell me it's ok to break up and that it doesn't make me evil.

foxc_uk

bicyclepirate wrote:

I'll be able to work in Norfolk but I'll lose out in a big way, I've worked pretty hard for the last six years and done quite well.

We both earn roughly the same I'm an engineer she's a vet.

We've lived together before, then about three years ago she moved to Norfolk to work for a charity or a while. I was pretty supportive and she eventually moved back to Nottingham, she had a few jobs over about 18 months and didn't enjoy them so she decided to move back to Norwich and work for a charity again.

Tbh, I'm leaning towards breaking up, but I saw this advice column and thought it might help to get some other opinions!

Lay it on me, what should I do?

Edit: I think I basically just want someone to tell me it's ok to break up and that it doesn't make me evil.

it sounds like you've made your mind up - if you really wanted to be with her you wouldn't be asking yourself or forumites for an answer. Dare I use the 'L' word? If you loved her it wouldn't even be a question that needed asking.

foxc_uk

Fungus The Muffin Man wrote:

ol\'gregg wrote:

Dear ladies.

Over the last few months my girlfriend has been waking up every now and again in a foul mood has a go at me and ignores me for an hour then things slowly get back to normal.
I have recently found out that I have been what she calls a 'dream cheat' where i have been cheating on her in her dreams with all manner of lady, thus causing said outbursts.

What's the deal with that??

Now I'm no girl, but when this happens it's can some times be because the one doing the dreaming is actually doing the cheating ..........

Or sometimes it's an indication of how you're behaving with her. Is there anything you can think of that you have done that may have made her feel insecure for some reason?
Would you say she's insecure normally?

Kaise

foxc_uk wrote:

bicyclepirate wrote:

I'll be able to work in Norfolk but I'll lose out in a big way, I've worked pretty hard for the last six years and done quite well.

We both earn roughly the same I'm an engineer she's a vet.

We've lived together before, then about three years ago she moved to Norfolk to work for a charity or a while. I was pretty supportive and she eventually moved back to Nottingham, she had a few jobs over about 18 months and didn't enjoy them so she decided to move back to Norwich and work for a charity again.

Tbh, I'm leaning towards breaking up, but I saw this advice column and thought it might help to get some other opinions!

Lay it on me, what should I do?

Edit: I think I basically just want someone to tell me it's ok to break up and that it doesn't make me evil.

it sounds like you've made your mind up - if you really wanted to be with her you wouldn't be asking yourself or forumites for an answer. Dare I use the 'L' word? If you loved her it wouldn't even be a question that needed asking.

Ditch
deah

end of

MissBint37

foxc_uk wrote:

bicyclepirate wrote:

I'll be able to work in Norfolk but I'll lose out in a big way, I've worked pretty hard for the last six years and done quite well.

We both earn roughly the same I'm an engineer she's a vet.

We've lived together before, then about three years ago she moved to Norfolk to work for a charity or a while. I was pretty supportive and she eventually moved back to Nottingham, she had a few jobs over about 18 months and didn't enjoy them so she decided to move back to Norwich and work for a charity again.

Tbh, I'm leaning towards breaking up, but I saw this advice column and thought it might help to get some other opinions!

Lay it on me, what should I do?

Edit: I think I basically just want someone to tell me it's ok to break up and that it doesn't make me evil.

it sounds like you've made your mind up - if you really wanted to be with her you wouldn't be asking yourself or forumites for an answer. Dare I use the 'L' word? If you loved her it wouldn't even be a question that needed asking.

You don't really need to ask for advice here. I know I am going to get ripped for this but you already know what you are going to do.

Ask yourself this, is she THE ONE?

If the answer is yes, then make it work. Whether that means moving or long distance is another matter and to be honest I don't think you would be posting here asking for advice like Fox C wisely said.

If the answer is no, then as hard as it is, end it now. We all get stuck in relationships because it is our comfort zone, even though we know it won't work out long term. We just need something to give us that push to move on.

If the answer is I'm not sure then its actually a no.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but it's true!

MissBint37

ol\'gregg wrote:

Dear ladies.

Over the last few months my girlfriend has been waking up every now and again in a foul mood has a go at me and ignores me for an hour then things slowly get back to normal.
I have recently found out that I have been what she calls a 'dream cheat' where i have been cheating on her in her dreams with all manner of lady, thus causing said outbursts.

What's the deal with that??

She is probably scared of it happening and it is obviously in her subconscious if she is dreaming about it all the time.

So, 2 possible things:

1) Have you given her reason to believe you are cheating on her/might cheat on her. If you have then it's your fault and you need to sort it.
2) If not, then she is mental and clearly using it to attention seek :twisted:

Gazlar

Lets keep you lasies in check and earning an honest buck.Is it wrong of a 31 year old guy who wears a suit to work, is a member of the conservative party and has had a mortgage from the age of 22 to wear skinny slouch jeans, atticus/criminal damage t shirts, open or buttioned right up check shirts, and hi top trainers, or is it pushing it a step too far to look youthful. Also is a flat peaked baseball cap worn at a jaunty angle a yes or a no?

Thankings

spongtastic

Gazlar wrote:

Lets keep you lasies in check and earning an honest buck.Is it wrong of a 31 year old guy who wears a suit to work, is a member of the conservative party and has had a mortgage from the age of 22 to wear skinny slouch jeans, atticus/criminal damage t shirts, open or buttioned right up check shirts, and hi top trainers, or is it pushing it a step too far to look youthful. Also is a flat peaked baseball cap worn at a jaunty angle a yes or a no?

Thankings

Well I do and im 36, but the t shirts are all classic Mambo or random. Draw the line at the baseball cap though, I don't want to look youthful I just can't be harrised.

Wearing a suit (full tie, pin, links job) every day mean that away from work I don't shave and generally resemble a tramp.

adiggers

" I saw this advice column and thought it might help to get some other opinions!"

Tartanyak

Is 'youthful' synonimous with 'fashion victim'?

MissBint37

Gazlar wrote:

Lets keep you lasies in check and earning an honest buck.Is it wrong of a 31 year old guy who wears a suit to work, is a member of the conservative party and has had a mortgage from the age of 22 to wear skinny slouch jeans, atticus/criminal damage t shirts, open or buttioned right up check shirts, and hi top trainers, or is it pushing it a step too far to look youthful. Also is a flat peaked baseball cap worn at a jaunty angle a yes or a no?

Thankings

It depends what said person looks like. ie do they look hot in this attire or do they look like a complete tool. Pictures required!

I don't like flat peaked baseball hats full stop, but then I have no fashion sense, I dress like a boy most of the time!

foxc_uk

Gazlar wrote:

Lets keep you lasies in check and earning an honest buck.Is it wrong of a 31 year old guy who wears a suit to work, is a member of the conservative party and has had a mortgage from the age of 22 to wear skinny slouch jeans, atticus/criminal damage t shirts, open or buttioned right up check shirts, and hi top trainers, or is it pushing it a step too far to look youthful. Also is a flat peaked baseball cap worn at a jaunty angle a yes or a no?

Thankings

Personally teh flat peaked baseball cap is a no, but that's just me. The rest of it makes me think that I'd probably wolf whistle you in teh street.

Gazlar

Pretty much yeah, I'd say that's fair comment. I see stuff in mags and on people and think yeah I like the look of that, then I try it on and think what the hell am I playing at? I tried on a flat peak cap a few weeks back and me and 3 people all said it looked good, but I bottled it. I bought a couple of pairs of skinnys yesterday, one looks pretty good one is a huge nono though so back they go.

Anonymous

Am I the only one who thinks the flat peak "trucker" baseball cap makes people look like specials?

Gazlar

See I think this, then I put one on and thought, you know what, this suits my specialness . In response to the how hot and wolv whistling, thanks but no, you wouldn't and i'd definately say I'm not hot, not In a aww poor him way, I'd say I'm happily average looking. Probably worse when you consider he came second in chester's next too model (we have different dads, his has a chiselled bond like jaw, mine has a 68 % chance of being yeehaa or so he tells me ) I'll supply pics later but don't expect robin askwith or dolph lungren or whoever the devil you kids like these days

foxc_uk

Gazlar wrote:

don't expect robin askwith or dolph lungren or whoever the devil you kids like these days

Alex O'Laughlin..... gives me a wide on



TMI?

Gazlar

foxc_uk wrote:

Gazlar wrote:

don't expect robin askwith or dolph lungren or whoever the devil you kids like these days

Alex O'Laughlin..... gives me a wide on



TMI?

not if I told you jodie prenger or Miranda hart give me wiener rigamortis

by the way, going back to wolf whirling, you're not really a builder called Clive are you?

Because I don't want another awkward evening in a yates wine lodge sharing a pitcher of woo woo with a 47 year old man. Turns out it may not have been me he was whistling at

Anonymous

Gazlar wrote:

See I think this, then I put one on and thought, you know what, this suits my specialness . In response to the how hot and wolv whistling, thanks but no, you wouldn't and i'd definitely say I'm not hot, not In a aww poor him way, I'd say I'm happily average looking. Probably worse when you consider he came second in chester's next too model (we have different dads, his has a chiselled bond like jaw, mine has a 68 % chance of being yeehaa or so he tells me ) I'll supply pics later but don't expect robin askwith or dolph lungren or whoever the devil you kids like these days

Is that meant to be understandable? Because it sounds like you're freaking out on crystal meth, to be honest.

Sorry, but those flat peaked caps just look mind numbingly dumb, no matter who's wearing them.

Gazlar

No I'm just typing on an iPhone and my knuckles are swelling so I'm rattling through, I'll try and paragraph

see I'm agreeing with you, I don't like baseball caps, I tried one on in tk maxx as a joke and got told it looked good, then I thought it quite suited me, in the same way that I think I can pull off eyeliner, but I wouldn't try. I was basically asking if I'm right to trust my initial instinct that flat bb caps are douche. It appears that the overwhelming opinion is yes they are cackk

foxc_uk

Gazlar wrote:

not if I told you jodie prenger or Miranda hart give me wiener rigamortis

by the way, going back to wolf whirling, you're not really a builder called Clive are you?

Because I don't want another awkward evening in a yates wine lodge sharing a pitcher of woo woo with a 47 year old man. Turns out it may not have been me he was whistling at

Miranda Hart... really?

Sadly I can't actually wolf whistle. My best friend can though, so I say 'oooh check that out' and she whistles for me..

Tartanyak

I wish I could whistle I just end up spitting or doing a rather unhygienic pob impression.

Gazlar

Is your friend called Clive then? Say hi to him from me if it is.

And yeah Miranda, not in a phwoahhh look at her way but I find her and her nature compelling and interesting, I understand her comedically self depricating style, which I'd take over conventional good looks and a complete personality clash any day

Anonymous

Gazlar wrote:

in the same way that I think I can pull off eyeliner,

Haha, I went through that when I was in my late teens. I'm a big bloke though, so it just looked very very wrong

Gazlar

yeehaamcgee wrote:

Gazlar wrote:

in the same way that I think I can pull off eyeliner,

Haha, I went through that when I was in my late teens. I'm a big bloke though, so it just looked very very wrong

I looked like boy George, but sometimes you need people to tell you you look wrong and as a bloke, you're more likely to accept the opinion of a woman

Gazlar

Right, time to put me knackers on the line, this is not a hot or not as I can't cope with the not's Just can I get away with said skinny jeans?

so heres normal attire

Skinny Attire

And to temper it, workwear


please be gentle with me

Anonymous

That's not skinny jeans. Dear god man, We had a band in here for the last fortnight who knew a thing or two about skinny jeans. And they looked imaciated and strange.

Gazlar

They say slouch skinny and they're tight round the hams and nads skinny compared to my normal loose fits

Richie63

Gazlar wrote:

Right, time to put me knackers on the line, this is not a hot or not as I can't cope with the not's Just can I get away with said skinny jeans?

so heres normal attire

Skinny Attire

And to temper it, workwear


please be gentle with me

it must be the hairstyle that reminds me......