First date on Friday

il_principe

Only 'cos i disagree with your tastes! D

IMHO Grenache is better when blended - ideally as a Rioja, although I'm only really drinking Pinot these days. As for Semillon, again better blended, but I'll take a new world Riesling or S.Blanc any day of the week.

rjsterry

Il Principe wrote:

Also the restaurant at the top of the Tate Modern is a good bet. Excellent nosh and fab views over London.

Oh and Champor Champor in London Bridge is a hidden gem.

Or the one at the top of the National Portrait Gallery. The art might be slightly more accessible as well if modern isn't your thing.

greg66_tri_v2.0

Some Ron Burgundy dating rules:

On pre dinner drinks:
More the better. Order her drink for her, and make sure you’ve rung ahead so the barman makes it double strength. If you want to impress, run your tongue around the edge of your own glass a few times whilst looking at her with lust in your eyes. If you want to move up a gear, do this to her glass as well.

On wine:
Order the second cheapest bottle on the list. You have no idea whether the evening will be a good investment this early on.

When the waiter pours a small amount into your glass (I hate it when they do that – misers) complain. Always neck the first glass. Chicks dig guys who drink fast.

On food:
Order what you want for yourself, and what you want for her. When the food arrives, it’s chow time. Talking’s for later. Any attempt by her to engage in chit chat whilst the food is on the table is a big no-no. Say that you have to use the bog (“Restroom” is for wimps) and leave if that happens.

On her:
Write her name down on your hand. Indelible ink - this will be useful later during the deed.

Compliment her on her sexy body. Unless that’s lacking. Then take a glance at her, look out the window and comment on the weather. She’ll twig that she’s punching two divisions above her weight (pun!) and will be sure to put out.

On chewing gum:
When you take it out of your pocket, be sure that it “accidentally” extracts from your super-tight slacks your 12-pack of jumbo condoms so that they fall on the floor. Don’t rush to pick them up – if you can, ask her to pick them up for you. This is a sure fire success gambit.

Come the time, take it out and stick it somewhere she can’t see it. Open a fresh stick afterwards.

On the bill:
Slide the bill towards her, lean back and stare at her. This can be a good time to put your feet up on the front of her chair. Remove shoes first for added intimacy.

On kissing:
There’s bound to be some early resistance, so be ready for it. It’s a temporary thing though.

On the journey home:
Cab it, because the back of a cab is a free for all with the bonus of wipe clean seats. GOAL!

On bom chicka wah wah:
Remember, it’s your evening. Take as much or as little time as you want. Especially if there’s a TV to watch afterwards.

On the next day:
Ask her to leave politely before she asks what’s for breakfast. If that fails, drop the "politely" bit. Unless it’s her place.

Always wait for her to call you. Bin the first three calls, ‘cos you're better than that.


Commence Attack Run!

rjsterry

Oh and there's only one i in Sémillon.

EKE_38BPM

Thanks all for the venue tips. I'm still liking the idea of a comedy club (they've worked very well in the past for me) and a mate suggested the London Aquarium, along the same lines of Tate Modern, lots to walk around and see.

I always find a first date meal a bit much. Have to keep the conversation flowing (if it isn't already), she might not be relaxed eating with a new (potential) partner, concern of bits stuck in teeth etc.

DDD, you do understand this is my first date with her, not my first ever date, right?
I think by now I know what the 'go' signs are, when to go for the first kiss, how to get jiggy wid it and post date protocol.

DonDaddyD wrote:

Pace Power Aggression Control Creativity

Sounds like the judging criteria for Robot Wars!

il_principe

EKE_38BPM wrote:

DDD, you do understand this is my first date with her, not my first ever date, right?
I think by now I know what the 'go' signs are, when to go for the first kiss, how to get jiggy wid it and post date protocol.

even if DDD appears not to...

cee

When I was last in london, i took LIT's advice and went to dehesa.

Really good.

Definitely the low tables....

We had a bottle of the Valle Buttrio which was perfect...light yet fruity.

Order all of the food on the menu....nice small tapas style portions....you don't have to finish everything....

That aside, I like midweek lunch for a first date...shorter, so not the end of the world if it doesn't work out...plus leaves a good opening for something else on a friday evening, where you know you have both already hit it off.

gtvlusso

Some gtvlusso dating rules:

(stolen from DDD - buy you a beer to make it up...maybe have a date?

On wine:
Chateau Neuf Du Pape - expensive and gets you wrecked (if she is a kwality lass)
House red - sufficient for your standard models.
White - No never, only people with inbredding issues drink white wine.

On other drinks:
Don't order ordinary lager, order a pint of Diesel or go for a kwality continental lager like Stella or Special Brew - your ability to drink like an idiot and recount all of Gary Linekers greatest goals will impress even the likes of Supermodel Giselle. True "Don Juans" only drink spirits from an undisclosed bottle in a brown paper bag - don't dissapoint on this, a fistful of Bourbon will go down a treat and come back and surprise uyou later in the evening.

On food:
A kebab is the food of the angels - however, on cold night - offer her a bunk at your pad and one of LiT's prized Jalfrezi Toastie - remember, if it is good enough for LiT it is good enough for Princess Diana.

On her:
Compliment her on how she looks like Colleeen Rooney and that those shoes really do look like Laboutin. Feel free to pinch her ar$e and tweak her nose at every opportunity - don't foget the all imortant fiddle with the goldie lookin' necklace - then tweak her chin as she looks down....always a class move that can lead to eye contact...

On chewing gum:
Hubba Bubba is the best place to start - impress her by blowing huge bubbles - then giggling and swallowing the gum. I would go for Strawberry - it shows that you are in touch with your feminine side.

On chewing gum part two:
Keep the gum in a sainsburys bag with the booze - Sainsbuburys bags are bright orange - not only will you show concern for her safety under low light conditions, but you will also prove that you are prepared to pay that little more than just asda prices (remember to stash those asda bags away if you go back to your pad!)

On the bill:
If there is no clear offer to pay by her, then there are 2 simple options:
1, Do a runner
2, Cause such a scene that the food was cold crap and so on, possibly threaten to report the restaurant to environmental health - or become a fake health inspector. The restuarant will be sure to give you your meal for free and will apologise to you. Free dinner and you will earn her respect.

On kissing:
See "tweaking chin" above.

On the journey home:
Assuming that you are still standing up and coherent - shout, scream and throw whatever you can find at the general public - this will be sure to earn you a lift home from the "boys in blue" for the pair of you at best case - or at least a bed for the night in a room you don't have to clean up afterwards.

Remember to ask for a BJ as you find transport.....preferably by a sacred monument in full view of CCTV.

On bom chicka wah wah:

If you get this far, I would advise that you promote you previous "triumphs" with all gusto! She will be impressed at your stamina and the fact that you did it like that porno bloke.
Assuming the room is not spinning, always offer for her to call one of her mates over for a bit more fun.

On the next day:
If she has any class at all, she will wash up and do the laundry before she leaves - if it is her pad, then I would advise stealing her pants (chicks love it when you have something personal of theirs) and tieing them to various car aerials along Jamaica road.
Obviously, you should leave part of you in the loo before you go......the thought of cleaning up after you just fires them up.

Good luck.

Don't tell her your a bloody cyclist! For gods sake!!!

DonDaddyD

Hey I'm just trying to help a brotha out ya'get'me...

We all need a pep-talk, our skills refreshed and retrained from time to time.

I ain't saying you ain't got game yo!

As for place, Ms DDD would hate London Aquarium. She loves restaurants, foodie type places, markets and theatre/musicals. I once took her to the sound of music sing-a-long.

A Gothic chick I knew would love the London Flim and Comic Festival or London Erotica. A dancer chick I knew loved salsa everything.

Of what you know about the girl, take her to the place you think she'll like the most.

dhope

You missed a rule DDD

Finally, and most importantly, if you happen to spy a spider, moth, bee or mouse at any point on the date, be it in the restaurant (in which case, pick a better restaurant) or walking to or from, even if you are otherwise guaranteed a lay, get out of there. Ignore the girl, she can fend for herself, this is life and death. Mice, especially, are not to be trifled with!

Alphabet

DonDaddyD wrote:

Coq d'argent
1 Poultry
London
EC2R 8EJ

Rooftop bar (has indoory/restaurant bit, rooftop garden and nice warm heaters) literally on top of Bank tube station.

That place will get you epic levels of laid. Both buckwild and meaningful all in one go! Your pelvis will be dust and you won't be able to cycle no more! What a way to go.

It's so nice even if I took LiT there she might be swayed to put out... and she doesn't normally go for "them".

+1 on the coq. plus the name is coq. *titter*

it's actually over the road from the office where i and WesternWay work. Only managed to blag one freebie work related meal there so far, but I'm always working on a second. Good for just a drink too.

greg66_tri_v2.0

Can't believe I'd forgotten about this one.

You should take her up the Oxo Tower.

<snigger>

UndercoverElephant

Greg66 wrote:

Can't believe I'd forgotten about this one.

You should take her up the Oxo Tower.

<snigger>

I'd love to say you only owe me a new keyboard, but I'm WFH this aft' so you owe me whole new laptop.

gtvlusso

Or offer to meet her at Bakerloo Station (where brown meets pink)........*sorry :-(

lost_in_thought

cee wrote:

When I was last in london, i took LIT's advice and went to dehesa.

Really good.

Definitely the low tables....

We had a bottle of the Valle Buttrio which was perfect...light yet fruity.

Order all of the food on the menu....nice small tapas style portions....you don't have to finish everything....

Told you so

And I'm glad you liked it. It's a great place.

And DDD, your dating 'tips' are hilarious! If you took me to the Coq d'Argent and ordered a Grenache, we'd be so over.



EDIT:

Actually, I'm going to do my own 'dating rules' from a girl's perspective:

Restaurant/Food/Wine: Go somewhere you know or have sized up or have had recommended. Have an idea of what's good before you get there. If you don't know about wine, ask her or the waiter for ideas. Failing that, the 'second/third cheapest' rule should work.

If you/your date pick(s) up chicken bones, leave immediately.

Chewing Gum: Don't. Just don't. If you must be minty, have a mint. Nobody wants to date a ruminant.

The Bill (hums theme song): Offer to pay, she will counter-offer to split. If at this point you don't insist on paying, you should have done. Doesn't matter what the outcome is.

The Rest Just make sure you ignore pretty much everything DDD's said. I'm really hoping it was all for comic effect.

DonDaddyD

lost_in_thought wrote:

And DDD, your dating 'tips' are hilarious! If you took me to the Coq d'Argent....

So you'd say yes then!!!

greg66_tri_v2.0

lost_in_thought wrote:

And DDD, your dating 'tips' are hilarious! If you took me to the Coq d'Argent and ordered a Grenache, we'd be so over.

Yeah ... with your Aussie heritage, I could have told him that.

I'm guessing your ideal date has to (a) find a spit 'n' sawdust place, (a) order you a (cheap) cold lager, (c) land a punch on the biggest bloke in the bar. If the date is still standing with the majority of his own teeth in his mouth five minutes after that, you're all his.

Ahhh. I love a happy ending.

greg66_tri_v2.0

lost_in_thought wrote:

If you/your date pick(s) up chicken bones, leave immediately.

Hold on. Are you suggesting that he should leave the carcass/bones on the plate, and lean forward so he can gnaw at them whilst keeping them on the plate? Like bobbing for apples, but with chicken debris?

Weird, dudette. Too weird. :shock:

lost_in_thought

Greg66 wrote:

lost_in_thought wrote:

If you/your date pick(s) up chicken bones, leave immediately.

Hold on. Are you suggesting that he should leave the carcass/bones on the plate, and lean forward so he can gnaw at them whilst keeping them on the plate? Like bobbing for apples, but with chicken debris?

Weird, dudette. Too weird. :shock:

I hadn't even got to gnawing. Ugh.

itboffin

lost_in_thought wrote:

Greg66 wrote:

lost_in_thought wrote:

If you/your date pick(s) up chicken bones, leave immediately.

Hold on. Are you suggesting that he should leave the carcass/bones on the plate, and lean forward so he can gnaw at them whilst keeping them on the plate? Like bobbing for apples, but with chicken debris?

Weird, dudette. Too weird. :shock:

I hadn't even got to gnawing. Ugh.

So then it's back to a swanky west London club for a nightcap or something :roll:

DonDaddyD

Another rule:

Don't order fish, especially fish with bones.

There should be only one reason why your face and fingers would smell like fish... :shock:

Stuey01

lost_in_thought wrote:

The Bill (hums theme song): Offer to pay, she will counter-offer to split. If at this point you don't insist on paying, you should have done. Doesn't matter what the outcome is.

Equality, it's great isn't it.

You'll be wanting us to open your jars next.

il_principe

lost_in_thought wrote:

Chewing Gum: Don't. Just don't. If you must be minty, have a mint. Nobody wants to date a ruminant.

Why the hate for Loyd Grossman?

dhope

Stuey01 wrote:

lost_in_thought wrote:

The Bill (hums theme song): Offer to pay, she will counter-offer to split. If at this point you don't insist on paying, you should have done. Doesn't matter what the outcome is.

Equality, it's great isn't it.

You'll be wanting us to open your jars next.

Good thing men still get paid more

DonDaddyD

Stuey01 wrote:

lost_in_thought wrote:

The Bill (hums theme song): Offer to pay, she will counter-offer to split. If at this point you don't insist on paying, you should have done. Doesn't matter what the outcome is.

Equality, it's great isn't it.

You'll be wanting us to open your jars next.

Ms DDD was overly British polite when I met her - the kind of polite that annoys most black people (that I know) but we're too polite to say.

Our first date, which was a drink, I said "I'll pay" She replied "No I'll pay"

This back and forth went on four times, I think we split it.

So the second date, which was steak, I said "I'll pay" She said "No I'll pay". I said it once more and she replied "NO no I got this you got the last one". So I said OK.

This took her by surprise, I didn't even offer to split it. She never did that again.

They can be trained.

greg66_tri_v2.0

lost_in_thought wrote:

Nobody wants to date a ruminant.

I can see it that it might be unappealing to have someone masticating in front of you, over and over again, while you're on a date trying to eat.

Fnar fnar, gnurk gnurk...

Clever Pun

Clever Puns Dating rules

Ignore whatever DDD says..

with wine order something that goes well with what you and your partner are thinking about ordering, don't be afraid the ask but mention something you were thinking of drinking to give a starting point

Other than do what you do...

I'm not in that much of a great first dater.. With my better half we went to a few pubs where (she was driving) I prceeeded to get pretty pissed while she stayed sober and listened to me rant about stuff (inbetween listening to her of course) it worked as 10 years later we're still together.. awww

That was more of a prelim date in fairness for her to make sure I wasn't a complete tw@t. Our first proper date I took her for a meal and then to a punk gig.

SamWise72

DonDaddyD wrote:

A Gothic chick I knew would love the London Flim and Comic Festival or London Erotica. A dancer chick I knew loved salsa everything.

The fluffy "find out what she likes" stuff is all very well, but just remember, they ALL like to be called "chicks". All of them. Gives them a reassuring reminder of just how superior you, as a man, are. They love that.

Kieran_Burns

KB tips for a first date:


Chloroform


I hate guess work.

il_principe

Clever Pun wrote:

it worked as 10 years later we're still together.. awww

although in fairness that's because you've tied her up.