Silly commuting racing

Littigator

guinea wrote:

On wednesday nights I see a lot of bling. I don't know why but there is always a lot of expensive carbon going west. I should be able to get a load of points from shaved, capped, team issue bikes tomorrow. Of course, the might fight back - especially if they're members here...

Are you sure that's not a Tuesday night when there is road racing at Hillingdon crit circuit hence most London clubs being represented by numerous riders all heading out there. Was probably about 100 riders there last night

Greg T

guinea wrote:

Just seen this thread for the first time and am bursting to join in.
I commute on the nobbly MTB with baggies and flatties.
FCN 11.

I also go around town on road rides on the Willier. Unshaven, clipless, Lycra (some team) and no baggage.
FCN 2.

I am now very excited about tomorrow's commute. ...

Welcome Guinea.

Remember to keep your inner player under control - it is a long game, play safe and patience Padawan.

Now then - I know I'm not the only one to have suffered on the embankment windtunnel last night. Jaysus - for all my big talk about my undergunned Paddy Wagon Tractor yesterday I was thanking the big Bike God in the sky that I hadn't already as I was being pummelled last night.

However - the Yin and Yang of the universe kicked in and I realised that whilst in the morning, sunny and still I was spinning out in shopper territory into the howling gritted teeth of a Gale my gearing was on the firm side of comfortable - suddenly I was competitive in the adverse conditions.

Ladies (Shaved bloke Roadies) and Gentlemen - I lay before you for your amusement and delight my night's scalp bag.

On the long windy pain travelator of the Embankment I done not one but two prize scalps....

A shaved (like a big nancy don't like it windy Lady) Roadie on a Cannondale and

wait for it

A dude on a Litespeed! Titanium! and me on my tractor - genius. Of course this is not how it felt as I was spinning my heart out leading them off from Vauxhall to Albert Bridges. Not only that there was clear air between me and them by the time we reached the Albert lights - I shaken them off my tail.

I'm booking the win. They both moved through the traffiic ahead of me after that - we all knew who manned up the big stretch.....

Like all good things this came at a cost..... My toenails have blackened and I can only eat liquidised food.

However that is not all brothers!

Running through Parsons Green - after the heroics of the Embankment feeling a little juiced a dude on a Langster does me in the lights zone at the lights at the end of the Green.

Singlie on Singlie mano a mano action - it is on.

Traffic queueing all the way down to.......

Putney Bridge

Yes - the Arena of the game - 200m of incling car free bus lane - now with fresh new tarmac.

I was on his six as we rounded the corner. He stood up as we went through the lights before the bus stop and I knew then that I had the power.

I stayed down gripped the hoods squeezed on and by 1/2 way up the incline he was mine. Tasted Good. As I went by I think I actually heard his resolve snap - sounds like a very dry twig being broken by a very large metal working vice.

Clever Pun

Irritation and joy for me this morning...

Cycling in feeling a bit more tired than I should and I hadn't seen a damned thing... until cominginto lewisham on a particularly pock marked bit of road a car proper buzzed me I think an inch and I'd have been clipped so as I freewheeled recomposing myslef and getting ready to put my angry face on on 2 roadies overtake me the first letting me know the car was a nats wide-on away from claiming me as they went past :x Games back on and I'm on them both in a flash, the leader is the hairless chap I've scalped a couple of times but like a pair of jessies they're turning off into the cyclepath before the lombard roundabout and before I can overtake then fairly... Have I been done there or is there special dispensation including their fairly close turning off???

Anyway on the A13 I made myself feel better by taking a scooter on and winning this time... drop cog pedal like crazy, drop another pedal faster and Weeeeee score

Littigator

So my first day out with a mental score card in hand, so to speak...

after dropping The Better Half at her work (London Bridge from Battersea) it's then back along the E glancing longingly over at the scalps heading eastwards. It's a little quiet heading westbound (sigh) where are the Gamers, where are those scooters?

But one slight lift to the trip, most of which I spent on my own caning 25 mph, lungs busrting but with a casual manly glimmer of a smile on my face, was the sport of traffic dodging with about 6 other cyclists along Upper Thames Street.

Two-lane traffic at a standstill with various options of inside by the pavement, down the middle or round the outside, all of us determined to beat the other whilst at no time admitting it. Add to the fray the scooters that think they are as narrow as bikes (why o why do they persist in this self delusion)

Anyway, it ended with my powering out ahead to the Blackfriars underpass leaving dust in their faces.

Not a score I know, but bloody good fun nonetheless :twisted:

guinea

I woke up early this morning to prepare for my assault on London's commuters.

I decided to go with the MTB as my usual commuting vehicle of choice. This should give me a better chance at finding enough worthy opponenents in my short commute.

On a normal morning there are dozens of cyclists on the Uxbridge Road so there should be rich pickings for a fired up player. To give myself the best chance I actually spent half an hour on the turbo trainer before leaving my garage. Fully warmed up I headed towards the killing fields.

This is when the wierdness started. There were no cyclists onthe drag to the big junction with the North Circular. The next stretch to Acton is usually littered with cyclists but today there were none. After Acton the road ahead was again empty. I stayed on the busy route all the way to Shepherd's Bush and didn't find a single person to overtake.

So my first attempt resulted in a score of 0. Gutted.

victor ludorum

Littigator wrote:

guinea wrote:

On wednesday nights I see a lot of bling. I don't know why but there is always a lot of expensive carbon going west. I should be able to get a load of points from shaved, capped, team issue bikes tomorrow. Of course, the might fight back - especially if they're members here...

Are you sure that's not a Tuesday night when there is road racing at Hillingdon crit circuit hence most London clubs being represented by numerous riders all heading out there. Was probably about 100 riders there last night

My journey takes me west through Notting Hill and along the Uxbridge Road. Tuesday chimes more with my experience of wall to wall lycra than Wednesday.

Easy scalps from laydee smooth, club lycra roadies who are saving themselves for the circuit, and a bit of good natured duelling for the ones who fancy a bit of a warm up. My Tuesday night commute home is generally the fastest of the week...

Dunston_checks_in

guinea wrote:

To give myself the best chance I actually spent half an hour on the turbo trainer before leaving my garage. Fully warmed up I headed towards the killing fields.

That's the spirit man!

Before you know it you'll be working out a proper training schedule and doing sportives at the weekends; all to prepare you for the big boys' business of THE GAME in the week...

Littigator

victor ludorum wrote:

My journey takes me west through Notting Hill and along the Uxbridge Road. Tuesday chimes more with my experience of wall to wall lycra than Wednesday.

Easy scalps from laydee smooth, club lycra roadies who are saving themselves for the circuit, and a bit of good natured duelling for the ones who fancy a bit of a warm up. My Tuesday night commute home is generally the fastest of the week...

Yes indeed lots of lady-boy lycra saving themselves for the circuit...that was me last night which resulted in an 8th place and my first league points scored. A sweet sweet taste but at the expense of the bitter pill of letting any number of nobbie tyred numpties (and a fakenger on his fixie) burn me up down through Notting Hill....suck up the pain (aaahhhhhh)

Greg T

Littigator wrote:

Two-lane traffic at a standstill with various options of inside by the pavement, down the middle or round the outside, all of us determined to beat the other whilst at no time admitting it. Add to the fray the scooters that think they are as narrow as bikes (why o why do they persist in this self delusion)

Anyway, it ended with my powering out ahead to the Blackfriars underpass leaving dust in their faces.

Scalping in traffic don't count, You may as well ease off and line them up for the grind out in the clear. It is a deep joy to plan your mark's downfall in advance and execute your plan...

As Uncle Josef Stalin (The Official Game Liquidation Coach) tells us

Josef Stalin wrote:

To choose one’s victims, to prepare one’s plan minutely, to slake an implacable vengeance, and then to go to bed ... there is nothing sweeter in the world.

Some Roadie dude did me in the tunnel this morning, I'd run out of revolutions and wouldn't debase myself by bobbing..... It might have been you?

I'm claiming faux single status until I get a bigger gear.........

Edited to add....

Littigator wrote:

A sweet sweet taste but at the expense of the bitter pill of letting any number of nobbie tyred numpties (and a fakenger on his fixie) burn me up down through Notting Hill....suck up the pain (aaahhhhhh)

You need to get your priorities right.

Full respect for outing yourself after that reaming..

victor ludorum

Ah, Littigator, guinea, you are but young in The Game and have much to learn...

The mighty racer does not decry the lack of opposition, he beats the wind itself.
He knows the hardy tarmac, the arena of the Game, is as ephemeral as the grass which is laid and gone in the turn of a burnished crank, leaving only broken glass and pot holes for those who must follow in his draft.

The mighty racer knows that there is no player and no Game, but that there is the player and the Game. He knows that this unyielding truth will outstrip him even as he increases his cadence on the wheel of life, leaving him appearing to be standing still as he leaves shaven roadies and brakeless fixies standing still upon the road.

The mighty racer knows that the absence of opposition does not turn the Game to ashes or bitter herbs in his mouth. It makes the ultimate victory more sweet.

Greg T

victor ludorum wrote:

The mighty racer knows that the absence of opposition does not turn the Game to ashes or bitter herbs in his mouth. It makes the ultimate victory more sweet.

These are words of power.

I was thinking - as I indulged in no handed cable st bike path meditation and showing off like a cheap tart - this morning that the spiritual dimension of the game is the true path. Though doing dudes by over 10mph whilst sitting up like Mary Poppins and free wheeling does have a perfect quality all of it's own.

Haiku may be the perfect vehicle....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku

old pond
a frog jumps
the sound of water

or

Stiff Gear
Wind blows westerly
Man cries salty pain.

ChrisLS

...Victor, Greg...I sit at your feet...

victor ludorum

It is true that my saddle is a lotus flower,

but its a Fizik Lotus Flower K1 with titanium rails...

Littigator

VL the wisdom of your words gives me succour to appreciate the zen like state that is a full crank pace on a scalpless Embankment whilst keeping pace with red faced cabbies instead...bliss!

Dunston_checks_in

At the lights he waits
An athlete and predator
Shaved roadies tremble

It is 5-7-5 isn't it?

Greg T

Dunston_checks_in wrote:

It is 5-7-5 isn't it?

Indeed

Full Sus MTB
Rusty chain is grating
Slips by my gears.

This could be another thread with less testosterone in it....

You know for book readers and such.

Edited to add - just noticed this on the commuting front page.

I don't know what it is but if I ever see one I swear to god it will be going backwards..



Apparently it's got something to do with new shimano gears......

Dunston_checks_in

In fear of pursuit
I press on into the gale
Quietly weeping

Greg T

Dunston_checks_in wrote:

In fear of pursuit
I press on into the gale
Quietly weeping

The user previously known as Sea_Green_Incorruptible.

Ah!

There you are - I can't believe you swapped one really hard to type user name for an equally obtuse one......

And - I've just noticed that Coaster thing has a front pannier rack - presumably as standard.....

I feel cold.



http://www.bikeradar.com/commuting/news/article/shimanos-coasting-project-wins-international-award-17805

victor ludorum

Of course, haiku don't have to conform to the 5-7-5 structure, we must not become a slave to our model...


adventure beckons
faces, cars, lights and bus lanes
my turning wheels

guinea

A vision ahead,
Carbon, lycra, hairlessness,
Please slow a little...

or

A vision ahead,
Carbon, lycra, hairlessness,
In your face slowcoach!

victor ludorum

guinea wrote:

A vision ahead,
Carbon, lycra, hairlessness,
Please slow a little...

Pure class...

Greg T

Girl Roadie, hair loose,
At lights she waits, poised, ready
What do I do now?

Dunston_checks_in

Girl Roadie, shaved legs,
At lights she waits, poised, ready
Oh no! is a man!

Bassjunkieuk

Dunston_checks_in wrote:

Girl Roadie, shaved legs,
At lights she waits, poised, ready
Oh no! is a man!

It can be very difficult to work it out sometimes tho..........quite disturbing!

Greg T

So then - the weather is looking fabulous, clear skies very light southerly breeze.

I should be topping out at 20 mph, spinning at 100rpm and giving directions to American tourists whilst cycling down Embankment within 90 mins....

I'm thinking of abandoning the singlie experiment until I get the big gear going as my pride can't take the drop in speed and status.......

Yes I appear to be shallow and vain.

Littigator

Greg T wrote:

So then - the weather is looking fabulous, clear skies very light southerly breeze.

I'm even tempted to leave work and cycle back over the the City just to get a full run down the Embankment

Thunder down the road
Feeling like lungs may explode
Worth it for the scalp

guinea

I'm off the mark!

I had to go home a differnt route (via honda to sign registration docs on a new bike) and had to go through Chiswick.

Ahead I saw a couple of guys leave traffic lights fast and though they looked like a challenge. On closer inspection a lycra clad MTB rider was up the backside of a roadie. I put the foot down and caught up with them. It was pretty tough, but I pulled level with the MTBer before squirting the gas and pulling level with the roadie. He had a lightspeed which looked very nice. He didn't give in easily, but since I'd overtaken one and made my move on the other there was no way my pride was going to be dented by failing here.

So, my first points scored came as a double overtake. Woo hoo.

ChrisLS

...since the schools have broken up my usually rural/off road route home is littered with tanned yummy mummies out for a bike ride with the kids :twisted: ...nothing to do with the Game, just thought it needed a mention...sends me home happy...one wished me "Good afternoon" yesterday...

Clever Pun

I was feeling knackered last night after an extra 16 mile round trip to play two games of netball, so in an effort to push myself I decided to wear the little cap and forgo the helmet.

Absolutly no-one one the road...phew... until a roadie did me just before a hill when I then changed to my soon to be single speed and took him easily immediatly back again and left him for dead although my legs were screaming in agony I then upped the pace and left him for good.

Last night I encountered a right pri<k on a hybrid, pavement, rlj'ing the works... I went past him twice each time pedaling slowly backwards at 21mph... amused me, he better have noticed.

Greg T

Clever Pun wrote:

until a roadie did me just before a hill when I then changed to my soon to be single speed and took him easily immediatly back again

Someone lined me up last night on Putney Bridge of all places.....

So I'm waiting for th lights at the Fulham end - they change - off I go with an unusually clear run through the next lights and then over the brdge beyond - I'm mindfull of the pick off danger on this stretch so am not hanging around but not pushing on....

Whizzz

Another singlie has done me up like a kipper......

I reckon he's been tracking me all the way from Parsons Green and had held off and carried speed through the lights - he's a pro!

So then the moral dilema......

If I immediately lay the hammer down and counter attack I'll be busted for trying too hard. However if he doesn't go right at the end but sails on into Putney I'll never get my scalp back.

I go for an intermediate option. I squeeze alongside and ask him about his gearing!

Genius.

It shows that I have the juice to counterattack but also the breath to speak! I aslo do my bit for making the capital a friendlier place.

Now here's a thing.

Today as I came over the wee hump bridge in Fulham by Chutney Mary's I notice a Sheila with a flat, just ahead a taxi is pulled over so I nip in front of it (into the "dead space" right in front) and ask her if she's OK. The hybrid who's been drafting me through the traffic gobs off to me about my sudden manoeuvre.......

Now my take on this is that if you are drafting someone uninvited (and who asks for a lift on the embankment - no-one) then it's your problem to keep yourself and them out of trouble....If you don't want to run the risk then keep 5m clear space.

What's the view of the players?