Poo tin... Put@in...
Comments
-
I like the idea of insulting tape. If he'd unrolled a bit would it start saying things like "Call yourself a skier? You fell over you ****ing numpty and now you're hurt. You deserve it you stupid ****"MattFalle said:
why didn't you just use a hankie and some insulting tape?ddraver said:
Well yes but I had to get off the, (yeah I'm calling it) rather gnarly bit of hill...which is tough with an elevated kneeMattFalle said:
still nope.ddraver said:Ok, I was thinking of smaller bleeds that that.
My attempt at knee surgery with the edge of my ski for example. Messy and needed tidying up by a (rather lovely, swiss) seamstress, but hardly life threatening.
pressure and elevation for your knee. just a bit of claret, tbh.
We actually cobbled something together from a rather cheap and battered small first aid kit which was a lesson to us all in how useful they can be.2 -
😀😀😀😁😁Pross said:
I like the idea of insulting tape. If he'd unrolled a bit would it start saying things like "Call yourself a skier? You fell over you ****ing numpty and now you're hurt. You deserve it you stupid ****"MattFalle said:
why didn't you just use a hankie and some insulting tape?ddraver said:
Well yes but I had to get off the, (yeah I'm calling it) rather gnarly bit of hill...which is tough with an elevated kneeMattFalle said:
still nope.ddraver said:Ok, I was thinking of smaller bleeds that that.
My attempt at knee surgery with the edge of my ski for example. Messy and needed tidying up by a (rather lovely, swiss) seamstress, but hardly life threatening.
pressure and elevation for your knee. just a bit of claret, tbh.
We actually cobbled something together from a rather cheap and battered small first aid kit which was a lesson to us all in how useful they can be..The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
So what are your thoughts on urine, as a sterile solution?0
-
no.
is that a serious question?
wtaf would you want to wee on something?
.The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
Depends on the context. Some people really look forward to that sort of thing. It isn't for me to judge.MattFalle said:no.
is that a serious question?
wtaf would you want to wee on something?0 -
Wandering even further off topic, got a rec on how to remove a tick if you don't have access to tweezers or one of those specifically shaped card things. Just start wiggling it gently side to side with your finger on its fat arris and eventually it detaches itself. Mind you, yet to test this myself. And hope I never have to.
Covering it in vaseline or in butter works aparently.
Tick removers, or something that can emulate them like a fork or similar, work by you rotating the “prongs” around the insect. I’ve read many times of advice to cover it in Vaseline, whisky, even burn it but I believe that doing and of that has a risk of the beast digging in harder. I’ve used a “tick twister” with great success - highly recommend carrying one when there’s a risk of getting bitten by one.
0 -
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......0 -
Do I assume that your response has some real meaning or just a particularly bad visual representation of your love to spout guff?MattFalle said:.
😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😃😃😃😃💯💯💯💯💯andyrr said:
Confused about honey as an ingredient in cannelloni - which region of Italy has that in their version of the dish? Maybe it’s an army thing?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......1 -
Daft idea.First.Aspect said:So what are your thoughts on urine, as a sterile solution?
However, sugar is the best treatment for crabs. Pour it down your pants, it rots their teeth.0 -
👍👍👍👐andyrr said:
Do I assume that your response has some real meaning or just a particularly bad visual representation of your love to spout guff?MattFalle said:.
😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😃😃😃😃💯💯💯💯💯andyrr said:
Confused about honey as an ingredient in cannelloni - which region of Italy has that in their version of the dish? Maybe it’s an army thing?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys.......The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
if Farage was on fire its a pick axe handle repeatedly to the genitals.sungod said:
if farage's legs were on fire i'd happily do it in his faceMattFalle said:no.
is that a serious question?
wtaf would you want to wee on something?
the only solution. FACT..The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
nope - clotting is a physicsl chemicsl processTheBigBean said:
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......
its just an excellent antiseptic.
its also a great chatting point as you're using it which distracts the patient which reduces their stress levels which is A Good Thing..The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
i heard Trump was into that sort of thing which is the video Putin has of him when he went across and tried tonegotiate for Trump Moscow whichis why he was/is Putin's btchi.....First.Aspect said:
Depends on the context. Some people really look forward to that sort of thing. It isn't for me to judge.MattFalle said:no.
is that a serious question?
wtaf would you want to wee on something?
.The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
Kim Yong Un also a bit partial, I hear. That's why they had all those parties together. Two fat blokes and some bullet proof glass.MattFalle said:
i heard Trump was into that sort of thing which is the video Putin has of him when he went across and tried tonegotiate for Trump Moscow whichis why he was/is Putin's btchi.....First.Aspect said:
Depends on the context. Some people really look forward to that sort of thing. It isn't for me to judge.MattFalle said:no.
is that a serious question?
wtaf would you want to wee on something?1 -
I think you might have missed the point about the leech bite. No one is stressed. They just have a bite that won't stop bleeding. They're not going to die. They're just going to get messy clothes and messy other stuff and would prefer not to.MattFalle said:
nope - clotting is a physicsl chemicsl processTheBigBean said:
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......
its just an excellent antiseptic.
its also a great chatting point as you're using it which distracts the patient which reduces their stress levels which is A Good Thing.0 -
Negatory Papa Smurf. Use the handle to stoke the fire, with intermittent beatings to the genitals. Then throw the remains over the fence.MattFalle said:The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
I am not sure. You have no chance.Veronese68 wrote:PB is the most sensible person on here.1 -
they're stressed because something they are a'feared of his bitten them, leeched itself onto their body, sucked their blood while pumping them full of toxins, they're hot, sweaty, tired, hungry and some ridiculously handsome geezer is laughing at them.TheBigBean said:
I think you might have missed the point about the leech bite. No one is stressed. They just have a bite that won't stop bleeding. They're not going to die. They're just going to get messy clothes and messy other stuff and would prefer not to.MattFalle said:
nope - clotting is a physicsl chemicsl processTheBigBean said:
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......
its just an excellent antiseptic.
its also a great chatting point as you're using it which distracts the patient which reduces their stress levels which is A Good Thing.
They won't die straightaway but there is amassive risk of infection and #badstuff.
.The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
There is DEFINITELY a market for vinyl tape printed with abuse. Sparkies would LOVE it.MattFalle said:
😀😀😀😁😁Pross said:
I like the idea of insulting tape. If he'd unrolled a bit would it start saying things like "Call yourself a skier? You fell over you ****ing numpty and now you're hurt. You deserve it you stupid ****"MattFalle said:
why didn't you just use a hankie and some insulting tape?ddraver said:
Well yes but I had to get off the, (yeah I'm calling it) rather gnarly bit of hill...which is tough with an elevated kneeMattFalle said:
still nope.ddraver said:Ok, I was thinking of smaller bleeds that that.
My attempt at knee surgery with the edge of my ski for example. Messy and needed tidying up by a (rather lovely, swiss) seamstress, but hardly life threatening.
pressure and elevation for your knee. just a bit of claret, tbh.
We actually cobbled something together from a rather cheap and battered small first aid kit which was a lesson to us all in how useful they can be.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
rjsterry said:
There is DEFINITELY a market for vinyl tape printed with abuse. Sparkies would LOVE it.MattFalle said:
😀😀😀😁😁Pross said:
I like the idea of insulting tape. If he'd unrolled a bit would it start saying things like "Call yourself a skier? You fell over you ****ing numpty and now you're hurt. You deserve it you stupid ****"MattFalle said:
why didn't you just use a hankie and some insulting tape?ddraver said:
Well yes but I had to get off the, (yeah I'm calling it) rather gnarly bit of hill...which is tough with an elevated kneeMattFalle said:
still nope.ddraver said:Ok, I was thinking of smaller bleeds that that.
My attempt at knee surgery with the edge of my ski for example. Messy and needed tidying up by a (rather lovely, swiss) seamstress, but hardly life threatening.
pressure and elevation for your knee. just a bit of claret, tbh.
We actually cobbled something together from a rather cheap and battered small first aid kit
which was a lesson to us all in how useful they can be.
le voila!
.The camera down the willy isn't anything like as bad as it sounds.
0 -
Everything is physics and chemistry.MattFalle said:
nope - clotting is a physicsl chemicsl processTheBigBean said:
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......
its just an excellent antiseptic.
its also a great chatting point as you're using it which distracts the patient which reduces their stress levels which is A Good Thing.The antibacterial property of honey is also derived from the osmotic effect of its high sugar content and low moisture content, along with its acidic properties of gluconic acid and the antiseptic properties of its H2O2
1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
That's one recommended option, but not the one I went with when I found 15 of them munching on my feet.rjsterry said:
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.0 -
The whole point of this discussion was about the blood.MattFalle said:
they're stressed because something they are a'feared of his bitten them, leeched itself onto their body, sucked their blood while pumping them full of toxins, they're hot, sweaty, tired, hungry and some ridiculously handsome geezer is laughing at them.TheBigBean said:
I think you might have missed the point about the leech bite. No one is stressed. They just have a bite that won't stop bleeding. They're not going to die. They're just going to get messy clothes and messy other stuff and would prefer not to.MattFalle said:
nope - clotting is a physicsl chemicsl processTheBigBean said:
Lot more blood with leeches. Does it do anything for the clotting?MattFalle said:Seriously - honey is the way forward for minor bits: small cuts, insect bites, grazes, etc.
Natural, healing, works utterly brilliantly as an antiseptic.
Use it all the time as its mega cannelloni.
Naturally medical stuff not out of a jar from Sainsburys......
its just an excellent antiseptic.
its also a great chatting point as you're using it which distracts the patient which reduces their stress levels which is A Good Thing.
They won't die straightaway but there is amassive risk of infection and #badstuff.0 -
15?! Had you been wading through a swamp?TheBigBean said:
That's one recommended option, but not the one I went with when I found 15 of them munching on my feet.rjsterry said:
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻MattFalle said:rjsterry said:
There is DEFINITELY a market for vinyl tape printed with abuse. Sparkies would LOVE it.MattFalle said:
😀😀😀😁😁Pross said:
I like the idea of insulting tape. If he'd unrolled a bit would it start saying things like "Call yourself a skier? You fell over you ****ing numpty and now you're hurt. You deserve it you stupid ****"MattFalle said:
why didn't you just use a hankie and some insulting tape?ddraver said:
Well yes but I had to get off the, (yeah I'm calling it) rather gnarly bit of hill...which is tough with an elevated kneeMattFalle said:
still nope.ddraver said:Ok, I was thinking of smaller bleeds that that.
My attempt at knee surgery with the edge of my ski for example. Messy and needed tidying up by a (rather lovely, swiss) seamstress, but hardly life threatening.
pressure and elevation for your knee. just a bit of claret, tbh.
We actually cobbled something together from a rather cheap and battered small first aid kit
which was a lesson to us all in how useful they can be.
le voila!
I expect to see this on Kickstarter shortly.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition1 -
A jungle. I hadn't appreciated before that just how sneaky they are. I was wearing boots, socks and trousers.rjsterry said:
15?! Had you been wading through a swamp?TheBigBean said:
That's one recommended option, but not the one I went with when I found 15 of them munching on my feet.rjsterry said:
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.0 -
Don't tend to get these kinds of problems on my Euro holidaysTheBigBean said:
A jungle. I hadn't appreciated before that just how sneaky they are. I was wearing boots, socks and trousers.rjsterry said:
15?! Had you been wading through a swamp?TheBigBean said:
That's one recommended option, but not the one I went with when I found 15 of them munching on my feet.rjsterry said:
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.
0 -
On your Euro city holidaysrick_chasey said:
Don't tend to get these kinds of problems on my Euro holidaysTheBigBean said:
A jungle. I hadn't appreciated before that just how sneaky they are. I was wearing boots, socks and trousers.rjsterry said:
15?! Had you been wading through a swamp?TheBigBean said:
That's one recommended option, but not the one I went with when I found 15 of them munching on my feet.rjsterry said:
I thought the thing was to just wait until they had had their fill, whereupon they let go and slither back to their pond.TheBigBean said:
Burning isn't recommended although I do find when you have a blood sucking creature attached to you that recommendations can sometimes go out the window.MattFalle said:
yes. I used Marlboro Red and honey, my go to treatment.TheBigBean said:
Have you never had a leech bite?MattFalle said:
nope.TheBigBean said:The internet tells me they are good for nose bleeds and leech bites. I can understand the second one. Very messy.
nose bleeds use a specialised designed by doctors for nose bleeds things. not something for menstrual bleeding.
and we're not talking "picked too many bogies" nose bleeds we're talking max fax.
if your leech bite is big enough that you think you need to shove a tampon in I suggest that you've actually been bitten by a crocodile.
leave them to what they are designed for.
Obviously reliant on the leech having disinfected its mouth parts prior to its amuse bouche.0 -
