Carlton Kirby

sherer

He wasn't good yesterday, with a few k to go and Kiwa people 30 seconds clear he said, I think he has a chance. Of course he does.

I've said before I think he's a bit of a closet racist. Missed the skin colour comments but that seems classic Kirby. Why comment on the race, when you can waffle on about complete rubbish

squired

Has anyone else noticed that his new favourite word is "brave"? Anyone that attacks is brave. Anyone who chases is brave. He even said that a new nickname for Kwia would be "Kwiatkowski the brave".

One typical example of his not actually following what is going on yesterday was where they went onto a gravel section and the graphic popped up on screen showing that it was 800m long. Within a couple of seconds he tells us how this section of gravel is 2.4km long. Needless to say, it was 800m long. Of course he never corrected himself.

Frank Wilson

How many times in one race can he say "Turbo Durbo" and still find it amusing?

Richmond Racer 2

Frank Wilson wrote:

How many times in one race can he say "Turbo Durbo" and still find it amusing?

As many times as he says 'Si Clarke'

yorkshireraw

He even mentioned and retweeted someone who'd said they needed to improve their Italian so they wouldn't have to put up with his commentary (so they could watch the race on RAI instead). It's almost like he knows he's shoot but actually revels in it.

sherer

at least he isn't on Paris-Nice.. although i assume that means he will do Tirenno instead. No doubt he has already assumed who he thinks will win the next race he commentates on and just shout their name every time someone from the same team makes a move

joelsim

Carlton was doing the Speed Skating on ES2 late last night.

Simon Clarke was tipped to win.

rick_chasey

Joelsim wrote:

Carlton was doing the Speed Skating on ES2 late last night.

IS NOTHING SACRED

Richmond Racer 2

Rick Chasey wrote:

Joelsim wrote:

Carlton was doing the Speed Skating on ES2 late last night.

IS NOTHING SACRED

Its like he has some vendetta against you Dutchies

Mikey23

Time for a hiatus...

bobbydazzla

Kirby at his absolute worst in Tirreno today. How can Eurosport justify paying this bellend a wage for delivering such annoying drivel.

He ruins the race with his inane warbling. He is without a doubt the most annoying and inept commentator I've had the misfortune to listen to, in any sport.

I calculated that on average he said "as you can see" every 45 seconds today. How can a professional telly presenter have such an obvious verbal tic, it's unbelievable.

joelsim

Got to say, I've noticed Brian Smith going a bit quiet recently, almost as if he's a bit embarrassed.

Kirby is getting worse, almost as if he's playing up to the criticism.

awavey

bobbydazzla wrote:

Kirby at his absolute worst in Tirreno today. How can Eurosport justify paying this bellend a wage for delivering such annoying drivel.

He ruins the race with his inane warbling. He is without a doubt the most annoying and inept commentator I've had the misfortune to listen to, in any sport.

I calculated that on average he said "as you can see" every 45 seconds today. How can a professional telly presenter have such an obvious verbal tic, it's unbelievable.

he was at his most irritating today for sure, tbh I half expected them to come back from one of their little breaks and hear Brian Smith had given up and left, as he was constantly being interrupted,mis-corrected and the butt of half the naff jokes.

Lanterne_Rogue

I was fairly neutral about Kirby, but the other day he got confused about who Kwiatkowski rode for. Instead of watching the finale of the race I was busy checking the internet to make sure I wasn't an idiot.

mr_poll

I almost tweeted today that I was surprised Brian didn't punch him today, Kirby constantly belittled him for picking Sagan as a possible winner. This is Kirby who picks pretty much any rider on the startlist as contender.

His inane drivel hit a new low today I think the verbal nonsense that left his mouth today went something like.

"And there is an the attack and the attacks are like battering rams, and like any good battering ram there is Kwiatkowski at the front of them, a battering ram throwing out batter, and that batter gets fried and burns, and Kwiatkowski will hope that he burns the other riders with his attacks"

I paraphrase but it was on those lines - utter garbage - and this was in the last few km's not him filling time.

slim_boy_fat

mr_poll wrote:

I almost tweeted today that I was surprised Brian didn't punch him today, Kirby constantly belittled him for picking Sagan as a possible winner. This is Kirby who picks pretty much any rider on the startlist as contender.

His inane drivel hit a new low today I think the verbal nonsense that left his mouth today went something like.

"And there is an the attack and the attacks are like battering rams, and like any good battering ram there is Kwiatkowski at the front of them, a battering ram throwing out batter, and that batter gets fried and burns, and Kwiatkowski will hope that he burns the other riders with his attacks"

I paraphrase but it was on those lines - utter garbage - and this was in the last few km's not him filling time.

I did send a tweet.

@BriSmithy not sure how you cope with that clown sat next to you. Chapeau!

He is defo getting worse. He seems to revel in people pointing out his many, many flaws. I saw a bloke giving him grief on twitter the other day for the nicknames he gives riders, I commented that he had many more issues with his commentary than what he calls the riders. Kirby actually liked my tweet.

Any race he commentates on is much less enjoyable as a result. I've only been watching cycling for the past fifteen years or so but even I can see things in a race that he doesn't appear to have any idea about. I was watching the Paris-Nice feed on the Eurosport Player app today whilst Tirreno was still on. There was no commentary but I actually enjoyed it more than listening to Kirby. So think I might just watch the no commentary feed from now on if that muppet is on comms.

sherer

mr_poll wrote:

I almost tweeted today that I was surprised Brian didn't punch him today, Kirby constantly belittled him for picking Sagan as a possible winner. This is Kirby who picks pretty much any rider on the startlist as contender.

or he picks a rider the week before the race and then fails to notice he isn't even in the race. As well as assuming every rider from the team he as picked is the same rider.. i.e not noticing when team leaders are working for others, despite a lot of the time them mentioning it in the press before hand

slim_boy_fat

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

joelsim

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

I suspect 1/3 of all Twitter traffic is bots from VoteCarlton through Cambridge Analytica.

Or you follow the wrong people.

gweeds

The Donald Trump of cycling commentary.

I muted him today and listened to my cat purring. His sounds made more sense.

slim_boy_fat

Joelsim wrote:

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

I suspect 1/3 of all Twitter traffic is bots from VoteCarlton through Cambridge Analytica.

Or you follow the wrong people.

Nah, just a simple search of Carlton Kirby. I thought I'd find a whole load of complaints similar to this thread. It was quite the opposite.

squired

A perfect Carlton example yesterday was when Kwia had been attacking repeatedly and then there was another Sky attack. I personally think Kwia has a very distinct riding style, so it was obviously not him within the first tenth of a second. Carlton of course immediately told the viewer he was attacking again (Brian Smith later mentioned that it was Rosa off the front).

What Carlton needs is a co-commentator who is able to keep him controlled. Brian Smith tends to just go quiet and leave him to it, as does Sean Kelly. The best I've heard recently in terms of controlling him is Matt Stephens.

When it was looking like Sky was dropping Eurosport I took advantage of the £20 annual offer. I have to admit that it is proving to be a brilliant investment because you can follow the race without either adverts or commentary.

bobmcstuff

sherer wrote:

mr_poll wrote:

I almost tweeted today that I was surprised Brian didn't punch him today, Kirby constantly belittled him for picking Sagan as a possible winner. This is Kirby who picks pretty much any rider on the startlist as contender.

or he picks a rider the week before the race and then fails to notice he isn't even in the race. As well as assuming every rider from the team he as picked is the same rider.. i.e not noticing when team leaders are working for others, despite a lot of the time them mentioning it in the press before hand

That really annoys me - the way he assumes any rider from that team is the one rider on that team whose name he can remember. Regardless if they're a foot taller or in a national champs jersey or otherwise look totally different.

bobmcstuff

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Joelsim wrote:

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

I suspect 1/3 of all Twitter traffic is bots from VoteCarlton through Cambridge Analytica.

Or you follow the wrong people.

Nah, just a simple search of Carlton Kirby. I thought I'd find a whole load of complaints similar to this thread. It was quite the opposite.

I just did this (think I saw your tweets btw) - DON'T DO IT!!!!

It's like watching a train wreck (or a Sky doping thread). Wormhole.

sherer

bobmcstuff wrote:

sherer wrote:

mr_poll wrote:

I almost tweeted today that I was surprised Brian didn't punch him today, Kirby constantly belittled him for picking Sagan as a possible winner. This is Kirby who picks pretty much any rider on the startlist as contender.

or he picks a rider the week before the race and then fails to notice he isn't even in the race. As well as assuming every rider from the team he as picked is the same rider.. i.e not noticing when team leaders are working for others, despite a lot of the time them mentioning it in the press before hand

That really annoys me - the way he assumes any rider from that team is the one rider on that team whose name he can remember. Regardless if they're a foot taller or in a national champs jersey or otherwise look totally different.

Yep see squired's expample above. Despite kwia having the rainbow bands on his sleeves he called him out as attacking when it wasn't him.

He also seems to spout his facts at completely the wrong time... When it's quiet going off track is fine.. if the race is on then stick to commentating

bobmcstuff

Apparently me and Slim are in a minority of two. Need support!

rick_chasey

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Joelsim wrote:

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

I suspect 1/3 of all Twitter traffic is bots from VoteCarlton through Cambridge Analytica.

Or you follow the wrong people.

Nah, just a simple search of Carlton Kirby. I thought I'd find a whole load of complaints similar to this thread. It was quite the opposite.

Kill me now.

slim_boy_fat

bobmcstuff wrote:

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Joelsim wrote:

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

Just checked twitter to see what the general consensus is, unfortunately it's overwhelmingly positive. Do these people have any interest in the actual racing?

I suspect 1/3 of all Twitter traffic is bots from VoteCarlton through Cambridge Analytica.

Or you follow the wrong people.

Nah, just a simple search of Carlton Kirby. I thought I'd find a whole load of complaints similar to this thread. It was quite the opposite.

I just did this (think I saw your tweets btw) - DON'T DO IT!!!!

It's like watching a train wreck (or a Sky doping thread). Wormhole.

Indeed. Apparently they are not too bothered about the racing, they just like the funny things he says in the five hours of monotony :roll:

rick_chasey

*nasty hat on* the provincial unemployed *nasty hat off*

awavey

Slim Boy Fat wrote:

bobmcstuff wrote:

It's like watching a train wreck (or a Sky doping thread). Wormhole.

Indeed. Apparently they are not too bothered about the racing, they just like the funny things he says in the five hours of monotony :roll:

which has its place to be fair, the graveyard slot doing Le Mans 24hrs comes to mind, but its not needed in the last hour of the stage, where there is actually stuff happening to commentate on if he spent more than just 2 secs glancing at the race or listening to race radio before coming up with next joke of the nanosecond. and he's definitely getting worse at it.