Seemingly trivial things that cheer you up
Comments
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This is an unbelievably bad attitude.rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.0 -
You think? You gotta be equipped to deal with it as bullying never stops unless you manage to luck out.
I've been at 4 firms and was, in different ways, bullied pretty badly in 3 of them.
And there isn't always a teacher or HR to dob them in. Gotta learn how to deal with it somehow. That's the reality of life.
Can't always run away from it.0 -
I'd recommend working in an industry with fewer knobheads tbh.0
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Yeah we all have sob stories from school. Some more than others. I have a lot. So what? Like I said, that doesn't stop when you grow up. You gotta know how to handle it properly. That's part of school, to learn how to handle other people in the world.pinno said:
Really?rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.
Bullying can have life long effects.
I was bullied at school. It was merciless and vindictive and callous.
From getting spat at to being punched for no reason other than I was different. I got into plenty of fights were sometimes I won, sometimes it was 50/50 and sometimes I got badly hurt especially when if you started getting the better of whoever, his mated would jump in and stick the boot in.
At the age of 14, I got a part time job on a farm and joined the school rugby team. I knew a few of the boys at the rugby and noticed they didn't get bullied plus they were okay with me.
I got bigger and I got tougher. I then started winning fights.
One one occasion, the supposed hardest kid in 4th year who was 1 year older and 18" taller than me decided to slap me around a bit until I snapped and I grabbed his shirt at the top of his neck and smashed his flattened, bleeding nose with the back of my right hand repeatedly until I was pulled off him. He stood there dripping with tears and blood.
He got hauled in to the office (then casualty to straighten his broken nose). Due to his reputation, he was suspended for 2 weeks. No one said a word to me. I wasn't questioned about it
But it still leaves its scars.
On the other side of the coin, my best friend was much more passive. They were merciless with him too but he didn't try to stand up for himself.
Even if you might loose, you need the confidence to stand up to it but he didn't.
I saw first hand the long term effect on him until we lost contact some 5 or 6 years ago. His experiences ran deep.
He came from a well educated, successful, loving family.0 -
Yes and your experiences match mine in the financial services industry. Offices can be worse than the playground.rick_chasey said:You think? You gotta be equipped to deal with it as bullying never stops unless you manage to luck out.
I've been at 4 firms and was, in different ways, bullied pretty badly in 3 of them.
And there isn't always a teacher or HR to dob them in. Gotta learn how to deal with it somehow. That's the reality of life.
Can't always run away from it.
However, bullying is totally and utterly unacceptable. In no way does it promote morale, well being, confidence, productivity, creativity. It has no benefit whatsoever.
This from the person who has banged his drum about Empire.seanoconn - gruagach craic!0 -
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This is probably the worst view you have expressed on this forum. Kids do not deserve to be abused to toughen them up or to give them life skills.rick_chasey said:
Yeah we all have sob stories from school. Some more than others. I have a lot. So what? Like I said, that doesn't stop when you grow up. You gotta know how to handle it properly. That's part of school, to learn how to handle other people in the world.pinno said:
Really?rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.
Bullying can have life long effects.
I was bullied at school. It was merciless and vindictive and callous.
From getting spat at to being punched for no reason other than I was different. I got into plenty of fights were sometimes I won, sometimes it was 50/50 and sometimes I got badly hurt especially when if you started getting the better of whoever, his mated would jump in and stick the boot in.
At the age of 14, I got a part time job on a farm and joined the school rugby team. I knew a few of the boys at the rugby and noticed they didn't get bullied plus they were okay with me.
I got bigger and I got tougher. I then started winning fights.
One one occasion, the supposed hardest kid in 4th year who was 1 year older and 18" taller than me decided to slap me around a bit until I snapped and I grabbed his shirt at the top of his neck and smashed his flattened, bleeding nose with the back of my right hand repeatedly until I was pulled off him. He stood there dripping with tears and blood.
He got hauled in to the office (then casualty to straighten his broken nose). Due to his reputation, he was suspended for 2 weeks. No one said a word to me. I wasn't questioned about it
But it still leaves its scars.
On the other side of the coin, my best friend was much more passive. They were merciless with him too but he didn't try to stand up for himself.
Even if you might loose, you need the confidence to stand up to it but he didn't.
I saw first hand the long term effect on him until we lost contact some 5 or 6 years ago. His experiences ran deep.
He came from a well educated, successful, loving family.1 -
Try not calling people knobheads would be a startpinno said:
Accepting it as the norm is even worse.rick_chasey said:
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No-one's saying anyone deserves abuse.TheBigBean said:
This is probably the worst view you have expressed on this forum. Kids do not deserve to be abused to toughen them up or to give them life skills.rick_chasey said:
Yeah we all have sob stories from school. Some more than others. I have a lot. So what? Like I said, that doesn't stop when you grow up. You gotta know how to handle it properly. That's part of school, to learn how to handle other people in the world.pinno said:
Really?rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.
Bullying can have life long effects.
I was bullied at school. It was merciless and vindictive and callous.
From getting spat at to being punched for no reason other than I was different. I got into plenty of fights were sometimes I won, sometimes it was 50/50 and sometimes I got badly hurt especially when if you started getting the better of whoever, his mated would jump in and stick the boot in.
At the age of 14, I got a part time job on a farm and joined the school rugby team. I knew a few of the boys at the rugby and noticed they didn't get bullied plus they were okay with me.
I got bigger and I got tougher. I then started winning fights.
One one occasion, the supposed hardest kid in 4th year who was 1 year older and 18" taller than me decided to slap me around a bit until I snapped and I grabbed his shirt at the top of his neck and smashed his flattened, bleeding nose with the back of my right hand repeatedly until I was pulled off him. He stood there dripping with tears and blood.
He got hauled in to the office (then casualty to straighten his broken nose). Due to his reputation, he was suspended for 2 weeks. No one said a word to me. I wasn't questioned about it
But it still leaves its scars.
On the other side of the coin, my best friend was much more passive. They were merciless with him too but he didn't try to stand up for himself.
Even if you might loose, you need the confidence to stand up to it but he didn't.
I saw first hand the long term effect on him until we lost contact some 5 or 6 years ago. His experiences ran deep.
He came from a well educated, successful, loving family.
You're naïve if you think you don't need to learn how to deal with bullies, which are an inevitable part of life.0 -
Do you think domestic abuse victims should learn to deal with it?rick_chasey said:
No-one's saying anyone deserves abuse.TheBigBean said:
This is probably the worst view you have expressed on this forum. Kids do not deserve to be abused to toughen them up or to give them life skills.rick_chasey said:
Yeah we all have sob stories from school. Some more than others. I have a lot. So what? Like I said, that doesn't stop when you grow up. You gotta know how to handle it properly. That's part of school, to learn how to handle other people in the world.pinno said:
Really?rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.
Bullying can have life long effects.
I was bullied at school. It was merciless and vindictive and callous.
From getting spat at to being punched for no reason other than I was different. I got into plenty of fights were sometimes I won, sometimes it was 50/50 and sometimes I got badly hurt especially when if you started getting the better of whoever, his mated would jump in and stick the boot in.
At the age of 14, I got a part time job on a farm and joined the school rugby team. I knew a few of the boys at the rugby and noticed they didn't get bullied plus they were okay with me.
I got bigger and I got tougher. I then started winning fights.
One one occasion, the supposed hardest kid in 4th year who was 1 year older and 18" taller than me decided to slap me around a bit until I snapped and I grabbed his shirt at the top of his neck and smashed his flattened, bleeding nose with the back of my right hand repeatedly until I was pulled off him. He stood there dripping with tears and blood.
He got hauled in to the office (then casualty to straighten his broken nose). Due to his reputation, he was suspended for 2 weeks. No one said a word to me. I wasn't questioned about it
But it still leaves its scars.
On the other side of the coin, my best friend was much more passive. They were merciless with him too but he didn't try to stand up for himself.
Even if you might loose, you need the confidence to stand up to it but he didn't.
I saw first hand the long term effect on him until we lost contact some 5 or 6 years ago. His experiences ran deep.
He came from a well educated, successful, loving family.
You're naïve if you think you don't need to learn how to deal with bullies, which are an inevitable part of life.0 -
I am clearly an easy target for bullies but I literally have never been to any school or institution without bullies and without being bullied in some way or other.
It's part of life. It's important to know how to handle it and how to react in the right way, as it's very easy to react in the wrong way.0 -
Out of Interest, how do you react In the right way. Laugh it off, make them laugh?rick_chasey said:I am clearly an easy target for bullies but I literally have never been to any school or institution without bullies and without being bullied in some way or other.
It's part of life. It's important to know how to handle it and how to react in the right way, as it's very easy to react in the wrong way.
Standup must be pretty brutal.0 -
Rick has a point, but it doesn't make it right and turns my stomach.pinno said:
Really?rick_chasey said:
Good practice for later in life. Bullying doesn't stop when you leave school.TheBigBean said:
What if the child was badly bullied?surrey_commuter said:
In my vast experience of one family it was because of their religious beliefs and on that basis would not trust anybody who home schools.TheBigBean said:
I think it is an interesting subject which I know nothing about.surrey_commuter said:
Never trust somebody who home schoolsbriantrumpet said:The gift that keeps on giving.
To clarify my issue is with the parents.
Bullying can have life long effects.
I was bullied at school. It was merciless and vindictive and callous.
From getting spat at to being punched for no reason other than I was different. I got into plenty of fights were sometimes I won, sometimes it was 50/50 and sometimes I got badly hurt especially when if you started getting the better of whoever, his mated would jump in and stick the boot in.
At the age of 14, I got a part time job on a farm and joined the school rugby team. I knew a few of the boys at the rugby and noticed they didn't get bullied plus they were okay with me.
I got bigger and I got tougher. I then started winning fights.
One one occasion, the supposed hardest kid in 4th year who was 1 year older and 18" taller than me decided to slap me around a bit until I snapped and I grabbed his shirt at the top of his neck and smashed his flattened, bleeding nose with the back of my right hand repeatedly until I was pulled off him. He stood there dripping with tears and blood.
He got hauled in to the office (then casualty to straighten his broken nose). Due to his reputation, he was suspended for 2 weeks. No one said a word to me. I wasn't questioned about it
But it still leaves its scars.
On the other side of the coin, my best friend was much more passive. They were merciless with him too but he didn't try to stand up for himself.
Even if you might loose, you need the confidence to stand up to it but he didn't.
I saw first hand the long term effect on him until we lost contact some 5 or 6 years ago. His experiences ran deep.
He came from a well educated, successful, loving family.
How difficult is it to treat others with respect?
By the way, I still haven't forgotten the bullying I get over the support of greatness!0 -
Entirely depends on the context and the situation, but I guess the main thing is to not take it personally and let it get you down, and recognise that people bully out of their own issues and not really to do with you - you're just the easiest target at that moment for whatever reason.focuszing723 said:
Out of Interest, how do you react In the right way. Laugh it off, make them laugh?rick_chasey said:I am clearly an easy target for bullies but I literally have never been to any school or institution without bullies and without being bullied in some way or other.
It's part of life. It's important to know how to handle it and how to react in the right way, as it's very easy to react in the wrong way.
Standup must be pretty brutal.
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Good on you Rick.rick_chasey said:
Entirely depends on the context and the situation, but I guess the main thing is to not take it personally and let it get you down, and recognise that people bully out of their own issues and not really to do with you - you're just the easiest target at that moment for whatever reason.focuszing723 said:
Out of Interest, how do you react In the right way. Laugh it off, make them laugh?rick_chasey said:I am clearly an easy target for bullies but I literally have never been to any school or institution without bullies and without being bullied in some way or other.
It's part of life. It's important to know how to handle it and how to react in the right way, as it's very easy to react in the wrong way.
Standup must be pretty brutal.0 -
I still don't like it.0
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People are different.0
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I hate to think someone is unhappy because of it.0
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Cuts both ways. People who are bullies are usually bullies because of various problems in their own life. Rare is the bully because they just like it. Most people have been the bully and the bullied at some point. Like I said, everyone has a victim story but no-one seems to have "been a bully" stories - we forget those rather quickly.0
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Yeah, that's a fair point.rick_chasey said:Cuts both ways. People who are bullies are usually bullies because of various problems in their own life. Rare is the bully because they just like it. Most people have been the bully and the bullied at some point. Like I said, everyone has a victim story but no-one seems to have "been a bully" stories - we forget those rather quickly.
It shouldn't be excused though, because where does it stop?
I see litter by the road near Cities/Towns, main roads. I've never done it myself though.0 -
Making someone else miserable certainly doesn't cheer me up.0
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I suspect most people have bits they either selectively remember, or feel awful about ...rick_chasey said:Cuts both ways. People who are bullies are usually bullies because of various problems in their own life. Rare is the bully because they just like it. Most people have been the bully and the bullied at some point. Like I said, everyone has a victim story but no-one seems to have "been a bully" stories - we forget those rather quickly.
Or that they all think their other friends were the ringleaders.
To bring it back to the original idea, I'm not sure escaping bullying through homeschooling is great, but I do think it's a perfectly acceptable reason to change schools. Of course the issue when someone changes schools because they were being bullied is that as soon as anyone realizes the new kid got bullied...0 -
In the right circumstances, it feels like a reasonable reason to home school to me. A colleague of mine when to boarding school due to bullying at their local school. I always find boarding school a strange idea.Jezyboy said:
I suspect most people have bits they either selectively remember, or feel awful about ...rick_chasey said:Cuts both ways. People who are bullies are usually bullies because of various problems in their own life. Rare is the bully because they just like it. Most people have been the bully and the bullied at some point. Like I said, everyone has a victim story but no-one seems to have "been a bully" stories - we forget those rather quickly.
Or that they all think their other friends were the ringleaders.
To bring it back to the original idea, I'm not sure escaping bullying through homeschooling is great, but I do think it's a perfectly acceptable reason to change schools. Of course the issue when someone changes schools because they were being bullied is that as soon as anyone realizes the new kid got bullied...0 -
This does all presuppose that it's not possible to stop bullying from taking place, which is just a copout for those who can't be bothered to address it. In a school environment it definitely is possible. If people are having to remove their children from a school due to bullying the school has failed at a pretty fundamental level and the head and governors held accountable. Of course this does require more than a statement on the school website about zero-tolerance.rick_chasey said:
And if it's tolerated at school, bullies will continue the behaviour into adult life.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
Some struggles with this concept at the moment.rjsterry said:
This does all presuppose that it's not possible to stop bullying from taking place, which is just a copout for those who can't be bothered to address it. In a school environment it definitely is possible. If people are having to remove their children from a school due to bullying the school has failed at a pretty fundamental level and the head and governors held accountable. Of course this does require more than a statement on the school website about zero-tolerance.rick_chasey said:
And if it's tolerated at school, bullies will continue the behaviour into adult life.0 -
lol if heads of school had to leave their jobs because they had bad bullying in their school, there wouldn't be any heads of school. Don't be so naïve.0
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We're in the middle of an Ofsted inspection. If they got even a whiff of an issue around bullying they'd be on it like a jack russel on a rat, and it wouldn't bode well for the senior management team. They prioritise safeguarding above education, which I think is a good thing.1
