The Cocktail Party

GiantMike

Hi. Welcome to the party, make yourself at home. You're looking very well; been on a sunbed?

Sharon is just getting you a drink. I've invited you all along because I know how much you all love to put the world to rights with your wide-ranging views. The other guests will be arriving in a while.

Let's go through to the lounge.

Did you see the coverage about the Iranian protesters attacking the British Embassy in Tehran? Wouldn't be surprised if Iran's not the next stop for our troops once they leave Afghanistan.....




your turn




.

hulla the hulla

Do we know what the Iranians were protesting about and why they attacked the British embasy ? Was it racial hatred or something a lot more serious like the fact that Ahmed woke up that day to find out wife number 3 had over cooked his sheeps head on toast brekkie....?

daviesee

I've said it before and I'm saying it again.
If only someone could dig up the footage.....

When the U.S went into Iraq the second time, George Bush said in his announcement that not only was it a complete success, it was the stepping stone to Iran. He never repeated it, probably under advisement.

At least that's how I remember the event and it still rings true.

Malt for me

Smokin Joe

Where's the toilet? I'm busting.

Any "Goers" been invited, know what I mean?

GiantMike

Toliets up the corridor, Malt's on the way.

I think it's interesting how the media is ignoring Afghanistan at the moment and starting to focus on Iran. Just like it did before Iraq 2003. Iran's nuclear aspirations are difficult to prove or dispute, again like WMD in Iraq.

nevman

...mmm nice canapes,I think they are all secret Royalists,look at that bloke pinching the picture of the Queen,and they are always pretending to be asylumists when the reach Dover so they must want to be one of us,at least thats what Brenda thinks and she reads the Guardian.
How much did you pay for this place then?....

DavidBelcher

Smokin Joe wrote:

Where's the toilet? I'm busting.

Any "Goers" been invited, know what I mean?

David

Cleat Eastwood

Whoops I've just spilt something on your carpet - and by spilt I mean jizzed - and by something I mean jizz - and by carpet I mean wife.

nevman

Cleat Eastwood wrote:

Whoops I've just spilt something on your carpet - and by spilt I mean jizzed - and by something I mean jizz - and by carpet I mean wife.

Typical,and the beggars gone and scoffed all the Eccles cakes.
Sharon wont be pleased.
That jizz stuff is difficult to get out,just ask Bill over there.

MattC59

Cleat Eastwood wrote:

Whoops I've just spilt something on your carpet - and by spilt I mean jizzed - and by something I mean jizz - and by carpet I mean wife.

That was the dog, not the wife !!!

Appletini for me please, keys are in the bowl.............

GiantMike

Not much interest in current affairs then.

Right, who likes women?

LeicesterLad

GiantMike wrote:

Not much interest in current affairs then.

Right, who likes women?

Cleat just ended my current affair.

Redhog14

I'll have a beer thanks -something German if you have it,

women don't get me started! I came home the other day and she only gone and baked a cake! Talk abotu rubbing it in.
Hey have you been reading that Pippa Middletongs book? This is a cool looking pad, I saw the pampas grass outside so when does it all kick off and have you got HD video?

nevman

Women,(splutters into gin),dont get me started either,my mother used to be one and looked what happened to me.
Hello,new arrival,isnt that Ahmed -dinna- jacket just off the plane from Tehran-no problems at Heathrow today then?
Nice pad,is there a Starbucks?

LeicesterLad

nevman wrote:

Women,(splutters into gin),dont get me started either,my mother used to be one and looked what happened to me.
Hello,new arrival,isnt that Ahmed -dinna- jacket just off the plane from Tehran-no problems at Heathrow today then?
Nice pad,is there a Starbucks?

2nd door on the left.

GiantMike

Cleat Eastwood wrote:

Whoops I've just spilt something on your carpet - and by spilt I mean jizzed - and by something I mean jizz - and by carpet I mean wife.

I've just had a thought. You're mum's due to come round and lick my wife clean later. You'd better warn her or it might count as incest. And you know you're only allowed to do incest on a Friday. :twisted:

Redhog14

You're out of bog paper mate and i just dropped one so give 10 mins, that'll cat clean itself.

LeicesterLad

GiantMike wrote:

Cleat Eastwood wrote:

Whoops I've just spilt something on your carpet - and by spilt I mean jizzed - and by something I mean jizz - and by carpet I mean wife.

I've just had a thought. You're mum's due to come round and lick my wife clean later. You'd better warn her or it might count as incest. And you know you're only allowed to do incest on a Friday. :twisted:

As that the blurb from 'taboo 3'?

Redhog14

Remember that last party, was that at yours Leicester Lad?

LeicesterLad

Redhog14 wrote:

Remember that last party, was that at yours Leicester Lad?

We don't talk about that party anymore.

Redhog14

Yeah but look at us now!

GiantMike

Oi. Get off that feckin' fixie. I don't mind you riding bikes but not feckin' fixies! This is a nice neighbourhood.

-spider-

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

LeicesterLad

Redhog14 wrote:

Yeah but look at us now!

I hope your missus doesn't look at your recent history.

LeicesterLad

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

No. That is the toilet brush. Somebody had an accident.

nevman

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

That`ll be Ahmed-my the desks at Heathrow were quiet today.
Damp squib anyone?

LeicesterLad

nevman wrote:

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

That`ll be Ahmed-my the desks at Heathrow were quiet today.
Damp squib anyone?

I prefer my squid dry, octopus is a different kettle of fish altogether though.

GiantMike

OK everybody, thanks for coming. I'll clear up the vomit later. Shall I call you a cab?

I think we're at Nevman's next time.

-spider-

nevman wrote:

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

That`ll be Ahmed-my the desks at Heathrow were quiet today.
Damp squib anyone?

Ahmed? Is that the bloke with the earplugs and the three women talking at him?

LeicesterLad

-spider- wrote:

nevman wrote:

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

That`ll be Ahmed-my the desks at Heathrow were quiet today.
Damp squib anyone?

Ahmed? Is that the bloke with the earplugs and the three women talking at him?

Its the one with the beard.

-spider-

LeicesterLad wrote:

-spider- wrote:

nevman wrote:

-spider- wrote:

Hi all - any chance of a Peroni. There's a cat outside that smells like a toilet brush.

Who brought the camel?

That`ll be Ahmed-my the desks at Heathrow were quiet today.
Damp squib anyone?

Ahmed? Is that the bloke with the earplugs and the three women talking at him?

Its the one with the beard.

Woman with a beard? Are you sure that's not the toilet brush?