Nodderpocalypse Now!
Comments
-
jeremyrundle wrote:Monkeypump wrote:jeremyrundle wrote:You have missed out the hands free morons who cycle along texting with no hands on the bars, I came up behind one yesterday, airzounded him, :twisted:
What an absolute d*ck (and I don't mean the guy texting).
As I said he was on a cycle/foot path, you had not thought of that had you, what would you have said if that d*ck had hit a CHILD because he was texting :!:
Did I SAY he was on a road, or did you assume....
What if he hit someone because of being startled by an arrogant zounder? But of course that's ok because you have the moral high ground don't you.Old hippies don't die, they just lie low until the laughter stops and their time comes round again.
Joseph Gallivan0 -
iainment wrote:jeremyrundle wrote:Monkeypump wrote:jeremyrundle wrote:You have missed out the hands free morons who cycle along texting with no hands on the bars, I came up behind one yesterday, airzounded him, :twisted:
What an absolute d*ck (and I don't mean the guy texting).
As I said he was on a cycle/foot path, you had not thought of that had you, what would you have said if that d*ck had hit a CHILD because he was texting :!:
Did I SAY he was on a road, or did you assume....
What if he hit someone because of being startled by an arrogant zounder? But of course that's ok because you have the moral high ground don't you.
A CHILD iainment, a CHILD! Whats wrong with you, jeeze...
0 -
Kieran_Burns wrote:TailWindHome wrote:Zombie_donkey wrote:I will be babysitting a nodder on the commute to work from next week.
The trip takes 20 minutes but I have agreed to allow for a 45 minute trip to allow for whining, falling off and pushing up hills.
It's nearly all cycle paths so no one should die.
My main worry is that I don't have a gear low enough to go that slow. It will be Pedal..... Wait..... Pedal.......... Wait................... shout at her and then leave her far behind until her screams of "Wait for me you fat F**ker" fade away with the distance.Anyway. I am mid 30s unfit, overweight - 5'7" 17.5stone, but I used to bike everywhere until I was 20 and had to sell my bike to pay for car insurance. I remember it being fun and cheaper than the car.
I'm thinking of getting an aluminium hybrid bike but I worry about the following.
I will have 4 miles along a reasonably flat cycle path to get to work but there are no showers at work.
I fear I will be sat, drenched in sweat at my desk for much of the morning with a big red face.
Should I just keep using the focus or just go for it and hope my boss has a defibrilator?
And then what about the chafing from my short fat hairy legs?
Comments from anyone else who is / was in a similar situation would be appreciated.
There's a lesson in there for newcomers and old hands alike
That would be:
Don't post anything that will come back and bite you on the ars*; as some smart-alec will dig out the post and completely pull the rug out from under your feet?
OK
There are two lessons in there for newcomers and old hands alike
Don't know why I remembered that opening post from ZombieD..may be it was the unusual username...“New York has the haircuts, London has the trousers, but Belfast has the reason!0 -
I imagined him tucked in behind me sucking my wheel and I rode a lung-busting pace for about 2 miles. Not wanting to give away that I'd clocked him and was in maximum attack I was breathing through my eyeballs and refusing to check over my shoulder for his proximity. When I eventually glanced back, which I dressed up as a nonchalant traffic check to move out around a cracked drain I realised he was nowhere to be seen at all and the noise that I thought had been another cyclist in close formation was my rear mud guard slightly rubbing.
Been there my friend ... many times.[/quote]Fatboyslim0 -
A CHILD you say?notsoblue wrote:A CHILD iainment, a CHILD! Whats wrong with you, jeeze...
Oh No not a child, Oh my, oh disaster, send for the fire brigade, the ambulance, the St Johns ambulance and Dr Barnados, it was a CHILD don't you see!
OK maybe a little OTT! (but JR has been doing my head in for a while)
SimonCurrently riding a Whyte T130C, X0 drivetrain, Magura Trail brakes converted to mixed wheel size (homebuilt wheels) with 140mm Fox 34 Rhythm and RP23 suspension. 12.2Kg.0 -
Paul E wrote:Just a few this morning on my way in from SE London, nothing to get all worked up about, even in pootle mode still had enough to just cruise past them, I do notice they all over dress for the cnoditions, I would boil in the things they wear even at a pootle.
+1, i'm down to jersey, shorts and having bumped into CleverPun the other week dug out my fingerless gloves. Some guys are still in overtrousers and rainjackets :shock:
Fortunately I have waterproof skin so have no need for these.0 -
TailWindHome wrote:Kieran_Burns wrote:TailWindHome wrote:Zombie_donkey wrote:I will be babysitting a nodder on the commute to work from next week.
The trip takes 20 minutes but I have agreed to allow for a 45 minute trip to allow for whining, falling off and pushing up hills.
It's nearly all cycle paths so no one should die.
My main worry is that I don't have a gear low enough to go that slow. It will be Pedal..... Wait..... Pedal.......... Wait................... shout at her and then leave her far behind until her screams of "Wait for me you fat F**ker" fade away with the distance.Anyway. I am mid 30s unfit, overweight - 5'7" 17.5stone, but I used to bike everywhere until I was 20 and had to sell my bike to pay for car insurance. I remember it being fun and cheaper than the car.
I'm thinking of getting an aluminium hybrid bike but I worry about the following.
I will have 4 miles along a reasonably flat cycle path to get to work but there are no showers at work.
I fear I will be sat, drenched in sweat at my desk for much of the morning with a big red face.
Should I just keep using the focus or just go for it and hope my boss has a defibrilator?
And then what about the chafing from my short fat hairy legs?
Comments from anyone else who is / was in a similar situation would be appreciated.
There's a lesson in there for newcomers and old hands alike
That would be:
Don't post anything that will come back and bite you on the ars*; as some smart-alec will dig out the post and completely pull the rug out from under your feet?
OK
There are two lessons in there for newcomers and old hands alike
Don't know why I remembered that opening post from ZombieD..may be it was the unusual username...
I took it as a compliment rather than rug pulling. I am a glass half full kind of guy.
Talking of nodders, I nearly had my first proper off today and I think it was a nodder. I was overtaking a very slow girl wearing arctic weather gear at 20mph and for no reason at all she just leaned in and swerved across me. I shouted and she said sorry and bumbled off on her way. I'm going to get a bell and use it like an Indian motorist in India on IRT worlds deadliest roads.Giant Escape M1....
Penny Farthing
Unicycle
The bike the Goodies rode
Pogo Stick
Donkey on Roller skates.......OK I'm lying, but I am down to one bike right now and I feel bad about it,0 -
Zombie_donkey wrote:I took it as a compliment rather than rug pulling.
That was the spirit in which it was intended
Mostly“New York has the haircuts, London has the trousers, but Belfast has the reason!0 -
a girl at work came in with a graze on the side of her head recently.
Oh dear, how did you do that i asked?
I fell off my bike she said
Well that graze is in a place that should have been protected by your helmet says I
I wasnt wearing my helmet because I was cycling on the pavement was her response :roll:FCN = 40 -
Classic nodder spotted today.
Rusting full-sus halfords mountain bike with terribly flat tyres - bobbing at a rate of about one bob every three seconds.
God I felt sorry for him."That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college! " - Homer0 -
Seen a fair few flatish tyres recently.
Worse then nodders though, we're now entering the season where people don't hurry home, instead preferring to socialise & run across busy roads all evening without paying enough attention. Had to grab a handful of brake the other day approaching angel as a chap ran in front of me, spotted me, then stopped and shouted 'whoaaaah'.FCN 9 || FCN 50 -
I think it's to do with spring, you get newborn kittens and rabbits and new cyclists, none know the way the world works.
I think we need to recruit Jeremy Rundle with his Airzound to jump out from behind traffic lights at RLJers blasting his hooter shouting "RED LIGHT, YOU JUST JUMPED A RED LIGHT HHHHOOOONNNKKKKKK".
That'll teach 'em.0 -
RichardSwt wrote:I think it's to do with spring, you get newborn kittens and rabbits and new cyclists, none know the way the world works.
I think we need to recruit Jeremy Rundle with his Airzound to jump out from behind traffic lights at RLJers blasting his hooter shouting "RED LIGHT, YOU JUST JUMPED A RED LIGHT HHHHOOOONNNKKKKKK".
That'll teach 'em.
THINK OF THE *CHILDREN*0 -
This mornings genius':
Red light, straight through....
Single speed, jumps queue at light and is then overtaken by everyone who waited.....
Temporary traffic light - therefore ride on pavement....
**Shakes head and walks off....**0 -
Not really a nodder complaint per se, but a summer-related very near miss. Young lad (10ish?) jumped straight back directly in to my path - backwards into the road mind - because his friend pointed a water pistol at him.
They seemed to find my expletive of 'Bloody Hellfire" humerous for some reason as my back tyre came up off the deck with the force of the braking. Is this term not au courant? Am I no longer down with the kids?FCN 5 belt driven fixie for city bits
CAADX 105 beastie for bumpy bits
Litespeed L3 for Strava bits
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast.0 -
i didnt realise that when you lock up on skinny tyres (mine are 28's) how far you skid
a guy went straight across me last night as i was doing about 23mph (fast for me) the guy had crossed the dual crarriage way i was on and crossed right in front of me when he seen me sreeching to halt he shouted "sorry lad" an plodded on
he was riding a Lidl special aswellKeeping it classy since '830 -
At the lights at Queen St, near Mansion House, everyone spots the police bike on the other side of the lights. Everyone apart from the nodder on the BB who sails through just before the lights for the police bike change. So Mr Police Bike pulls the nodder over for a strong talking to.
There seemed to be a strong police presence at Bank intersection too. Maybe the police are aware of the impending nodderpolcalypse and are reacting?FCN3: Titanium Qoroz.0 -
lovely evening for commuting tonight. Circa 17 or 18 degrees, not a cloud in the sky and i was in short sleeved top and shorts.
Kept on seeing many nodders all done up in their boil-in-the-bag hi viz long-sleeved jackets zipped right up to the top with full length trousers/tights on legs.
I actually said to a girl in said attire at the lights 'expecting rain?'.
She looked confused before the lights changed and i rode off after giving her a cheery smile and wave...FCN = 40 -
its going to be hell out there peeps. tomorrow, expect the worst!Le Cannon [98 Cannondale M400] [FCN: 8]
The Mad Monkey [2013 Hoy 003] [FCN: 4]0 -
heh I didn't see a single bike! might tomorrow as 'll be close to rush hour and around twickenham.0
-
Saw a few on the way home at 20:30 tonight. was in a ss jersey a thin gilet and shorts. Plenty warm enough and fingerless gloves again.0
-
Being a 'new' cyclist who commutes to work a few times a week, I suppose i fall into the category of "nodder". At what point to I get to join the 'ex nodder' club and post equally condescending remarks about other peoples attire, bike and fitness level ? :?
Maybe its just a city thing, but on the whole us folk 'out in the sticks' tend to be a very accepting bunch, and I personally will greet any cyclist who I pass, or who passes with with a cheery hello and pretty much every time will get an equally cheery hello in return! Maybe they then retreat to the safety of the internet to have a laugh at my choice of long sleeves over short sleeves, or that I was only managing 10mph over a railway bridge??
0 -
Don't think speed or bike affects whether you're in nodder category. Clothes maybe a little...FCN 9 || FCN 50
-
It is a city thing - I'm much friendlier when in I'm out in the countryside.1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition0 -
chipandpin wrote:Being a 'new' cyclist who commutes to work a few times a week, I suppose i fall into the category of "nodder". At what point to I get to join the 'ex nodder' club and post equally condescending remarks about other peoples attire, bike and fitness level ? :?
Maybe its just a city thing, but on the whole us folk 'out in the sticks' tend to be a very accepting bunch, and I personally will greet any cyclist who I pass, or who passes with with a cheery hello and pretty much every time will get an equally cheery hello in return! Maybe they then retreat to the safety of the internet to have a laugh at my choice of long sleeves over short sleeves, or that I was only managing 10mph over a railway bridge??
it is not clothes or bike that gives "nodders" away, who gives a cack about what you ride or what you wear - it is about basic road sense. Admittedly, you can spot the unfit people/FWC's as they "nod" when they ride - but chapeau to them, as long as they follow the road rules and don't present a hazard to other road users.
Most of the "nodders" I see are not actually nodders, they are just idiots that get on their bike when the sun shines and believe that they can run through any red light, ride on the pavement at speed to avoid junctions/lights, use ped crossings and so on - basically a danger to themselves and others. They don't bother with shoulder checks and lose all road sense whatsoever that they would otherwise have in a car.
Or I could have the definition completely incorrect!
Whichever way - chapeau sir!0 -
It's not about the bike.
My Giant SCR3 is a better commuting bike than my Kharma. Even though the Kharma is the better bike.
It's not about the clothes.
I chose the wear lycra because I find it far more comfortable and all round more hygenic.
It's all about how you ride and conduct yourself on the bike.
The courier (the pinnacle of urban riding) who cut me up and hit my front fork a few weeks back = nodder.Food Chain number = 4
A true scalp is not only overtaking someone but leaving them stopped at a set of lights. As you, who have clearly beaten the lights, pummels nothing but the open air ahead. ~ 'DondaddyD'. Player of the Unspoken Game0 -
DonDaddyD wrote:It's not about the bike.
My Giant SCR3 is a better commuting bike than my Kharma. Even though the Kharma is the better bike.
It's not about the clothes.
I chose the wear lycra because I find it far more comfortable and all round more hygenic.
It's all about how you ride and conduct yourself on the bike.
The courier (the pinnacle of urban riding) who cut me up and hit my front fork a few weeks back = nodder.
Come on - you know the reason why you wear lycra......wannabe superhero!0 -
The truth of it:
Food Chain number = 4
A true scalp is not only overtaking someone but leaving them stopped at a set of lights. As you, who have clearly beaten the lights, pummels nothing but the open air ahead. ~ 'DondaddyD'. Player of the Unspoken Game0
