Nodderpocalypse Now!

fenboy369

Two facts to point out...

Its a Friday.

Its a DDD post.

Now incase you are v.slow, that means its a DDD post on a Friday.

Look back through history at the often very funny posts that DDD makes, usually on a Friday. Have a cup of tea. Sit back. Watch the fun....

PS, CW, can I pull up a chair alongside you?

dhope

Cafewanda wrote:

CW pulls up a comfy chair and waits for round two. JR, I think you might be ahead on points :twisted:

I dunno, CHILD in CAPs was an automatic point deduction in round 1 for being overly dramatic.

clarkey cat

I don't say it often but.... LOL.

Cafewanda

Fenboy, please do. Loads of space here and I've got a bottle of wine and nibbles too

kelsen

This thread should be on Pay-Per-View!

kurako

The problem with Airzounds is one of proportionality. I don't have a problem with using them against cars and the like. Motorists are quick enough to toot and honk from their little metal boxes so you're just giving them a taste of their own medicine. It's quite funny really.

When you start blasting an air horn at other cyclists or peds I think that's a bit excessive and unecessary. JR has shown penty of disdain for 'morons' in the past so its hardly surprising he continues to find it funny to bully and harass people.

Clever Pun

Dudu wrote:

Clever Pun wrote:

More cyclists good... we were all rubbish once

Some of us read up on it and gave it some rational thought before we started.

Richard's Bicycle Book, 1979 edition.

oh please...

even with all the theory in the world you don't pick up on things like "that tw@t is going to left hook me"

Time on the road gives you experience and that'll help you avoid trouble

jeremyrundle

davis wrote:

jeremyrundle wrote:

Extra special bonus points for "Oh my god won't someone think of the children!?" response too
"sad"

So what you are clearly stating here on a cycle forum is that you don't give a damn about children or peds as long as the cyclist can ride how they want with no regard for others, I repeat "sad" :!:

My my, that's quite a firm grasp of the wrong end of the stick you've got there. No, that's not what I was implying, however your ability to infer whichever opinion maximises your outrage is apparently still functioning perfectly.

I was merely objecting to the "but what if a CHILD got hurt?" -- the idea that either children must be prevented from doing anything either remotely dangerous or that you can go to any lengths to protect them. Or possibly that you don't need to look out for other peoples' safety if they're over 18 (though here I'm possibly reading things that you didn't say or mean, and that's your trick)

Anyway, quite how you manage to ascertain my attitude to general manners, or my cycling behaviour is beyond me.

Don't let all this distract you though; the view from your ivory tower must be lovely.

(How we doing for points, CW? )

Still as arrogant as ever in your reply, your tower must be over the road from mine

fenboy369

Cafewanda wrote:

Fenboy, please do. Loads of space here and I've got a bottle of wine and nibbles too

Thanks CW! I've got a cup of tea, a slice of battenberg and lemon cup cake to bring along!

jeremyrundle

Monkeypump wrote:

jeremyrundle wrote:

You have missed out the hands free morons who cycle along texting with no hands on the bars, I came up behind one yesterday, airzounded him, :twisted:

What an absolute d*ck (and I don't mean the guy texting).

Oh and note I do not have to lower myself to being abusive

jonginge

Just - Radiohead #nowplayinginmyhead

Jay dubbleU

I'm with JR on this - if a car driver had been texting he would have got at least a fine plus points - if the guy rides in a dangerous manner then he needs a reminder ( and possibly a change of underwear)

jeremyrundle

davis wrote:

My my, that's quite a firm grasp of the wrong end of the stick you've got there. No, that's not what I was implying, however your ability to infer whichever opinion maximises your outrage is apparently still functioning perfectly.

I was merely objecting to the "but what if a CHILD got hurt?"quote]

No you clearly said with sarky tone

"Extra special bonus points for "Oh my god won't someone think of the children!?"

And then went on to say

"the idea that either children must be prevented from doing anything either remotely dangerous or that you can go to any lengths to protect them. Or possibly that you don't need to look out for other peoples' safety if they're over 18 (though here I'm possibly reading things that you didn't say or mean, and that's your trick)"

Are you a drama student

I'm off now to airzound some motorists, see you later :twisted:

Cafewanda

fenboy369 wrote:

Cafewanda wrote:

Fenboy, please do. Loads of space here and I've got a bottle of wine and nibbles too

Thanks CW! I've got a cup of tea, a slice of battenberg and lemon cup cake to bring along!

Party time!!!

I'll be asleep by 2pm

kelsen

jeremyrundle wrote:

I'm off now to airzound some motorists, see you later :twisted:

JR, interpret it as you will:

Highway Code section 112 wrote:

The horn. Use only while your vehicle is moving and you need to warn other road users of your presence. Never sound your horn aggressively. You MUST NOT use your horn
while stationary on the road
when driving in a built-up area between the hours of 11.30 pm and 7.00 am
except when another road user poses a danger.

Monkeypump

jeremyrundle wrote:

Monkeypump wrote:

jeremyrundle wrote:

You have missed out the hands free morons who cycle along texting with no hands on the bars, I came up behind one yesterday, airzounded him, :twisted:

What an absolute d*ck (and I don't mean the guy texting).

Oh and note I do not have to lower myself to being abusive

Oh my, what if the "hands-free-moron" had fallen off his bike as a result of your vigilante-cycle-police Airzound blast, and hit this hypothetical CHILD? How would you live with yourself (aside from the obvious answer of "in my ivory tower")?

Not sure where the reference to road or cycle path was in your first post, BTW.

And if you behave like a d*ck, it's very likely I'll assume you're a d*ck. And in the words of the great Roy Walker, I'll say what I see.

davis

Oh JR you really are a peach.

Oh well... /considers a pint.

EKE_38BPM

I would airzound a ped or cyclist about to do something instantly dangerous to me and I need to stop them urgently e.g. a ped stepping out without looking.
Shouting, or even worse, a bell, isn't urgent enough.

The situation described by JR didn't sound urgent.
Car horns sounded behind cyclists have been known to cause the cyclist to wobble and fall off. The fact that it was a cyclist's horn and on a cycle path don't change the possible outcome.
Two wrongs (cyclist texting and JR's airzounding) don't make a right.

JR, I think maybe you should have your airzounds confiscated. I say airzounds as I think you have two. Why two? Do you go through more than 20 blasts in one commute?

Chill man, ride zen...

Clever Pun

I'm just pissed of someone used :twisted: seriously.. what are you 5 or something?

DonDaddyD

I saw a Kid turn right across a junction (the one before Colliers Wood tube just after the bus garage coming from Mitcham). It was a proper wide right, wasn't an RLJ or anything, he was even leaning into the turn. And was texting no hands! :shock:

I thought:
- how dangerous,
- how funny it would be if he fell off (there were no cars around him and I don't care what you grumble PC bums say, people falling over/tripping is funny)
- how skillful

I think I even said Chapeau aloud.

Airzound- wtf are those things - is a bit kuntish. But then texting while cycling is dangerous. I've angled my helmet light inside the car of a motorist texting and startled them, they rode off like the clappers!!! We've all got it in us....


Oh go on then

fenboy369 wrote:

Two facts to point out...

Its a Friday.

Its a DDD post.

Now incase you are v.slow, that means its a DDD post on a Friday.

Look back through history at the often very funny posts that DDD makes, usually on a Friday. Have a cup of tea. Sit back. Watch the fun....

PS, CW, can I pull up a chair alongside you?

It's a DDD thread and I made it on Thursday.

My reputation precedes me!

cyclingpast

My two cents:

Riding a bike with no hands whilst texting is at best silly and at worst dangerous.

Airzounding someone who is riding a bike with no hands whilst texting is at best silly and at worst dangerous. If you feel compelled to mention he's being a moron (which he is) then have a word.

Though having said that, if I saw you airzound him and he fell off, I'd laugh, but still feel it's wrong; kind of like a Jimmy Carr joke...


I'll go get the splinters out of my a*se now.

gtvlusso

Yep - they were out in force this morning.......even the terminal mindf*cker, the guy on an old MTB who queue jumps at the lights and the gets all upset when he is told to get the f*ck out of the way......

I think my comment was something like "You better be allot faster than me", comment ignored. "Tw*t" as I passed him off the lights

Queue jumpers do my nut!!!

Grrrrr......

DonDaddyD

Listen, and understand. The Nodders are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until they've slowed you down!

It's out there people! On my commute, By Balham tube, stopped at the lights. A Nod-troopers pulls up beside me on my right. Lights go green and he pulls across me and positions his bike firmly ahead of me. He then achieves a spectacular speed of 14mph, thus creating a bicycle lane traffic jam! I'd laugh if it wasn't for the absurdity of it all and sheer lack of human awareness.

The Nodders rose from the ashes of the cold winter. Their war to slow down and inconvenience evey other road user had raged since the cycling boom of 2007, but the final battle would not be fought in the future. It would be fought here, in our present. Today and tomorrow's today until the very end of the commute...

They are out in force. Stockwell tube to Oval tube station is a mile long stretch of road. It's a road you can burn out sprinting as the traffic lights are few and far between.

For the first time in my commuting career the entire stretch of Clapham Rd/A3 (Stockwell Tube to Oval tube), the full width of the bus lane was filled with cyclists of various proficiences.

The numbers of cyclists were overwhelming.

But its not just slow Nod-Troopers. I take issue with the fast ones that see you, instantly think race (which would be fine) and then proceed to either get too close, draft, overtake from the inside and/or cut you up.

The Nodderapocalypse will not be televised

Kieran_Burns

DonDaddyD wrote:

It's out there people! On my commute, By Balham tube, stopped at the lights. A Nod-troopers pulls up beside me on my right. Lights go green and he pulls across me and positions his bike firmly ahead of me. He then achieves a spectacular speed of 14mph, thus creating a bicycle lane traffic jam! I'd laugh if it wasn't for the absurdity of it all and sheer lack of human awareness.

So... a nodder out accelerated you off the lights? :?

EKE_38BPM

Kieran_Burns wrote:

DonDaddyD wrote:

It's out there people! On my commute, By Balham tube, stopped at the lights. A Nod-troopers pulls up beside me on my right. Lights go green and he pulls across me and positions his bike firmly ahead of me. He then achieves a spectacular speed of 14mph, thus creating a bicycle lane traffic jam! I'd laugh if it wasn't for the absurdity of it all and sheer lack of human awareness.

So... a nodder out accelerated you off the lights? :?

I've only just given DDD his first D back and now he's in danger of losing it again?!
As Ed Lover would say, "C'mon Son!" (Youtube it if necessary).

DonDaddyD

It can happen i.e. a person may fluff his cip-in phase and this gives the Nod-trooper a moment of acceleration greater than the other person.

In my case, no and he didn't out accelerate me. He pulls out on my right and due to the road merging into one lane he cuts across me and I am compelled to let him in because, you know, undertaking is dangerous.

It's the whole - "If I've out accelerated you at every single lights prior and you would catch me except for traffic lights then why, when stopped at th lights, must you put your bike in front of mine" - scenario.

notsoblue

So much hate!

Can't you guys just go into super primary when entering the ASL?

flicksta

Showers much harder to come by at work this morning, a sure sign of Dawn of the Nodders.

DonDaddyD

I thought I did. This guy was right of that. That's why I let him in. Bare in mind last time that happened dude's crank fell off and took me out.

What people have to remember is that there are a lot of rude, inconsiderate, unsociable people, frankly dicks, in London at any one given time. That extends to people who usually attach themselves to an emerging trend, like cycling.

notsoblue

DonDaddyD wrote:

I thought I did. This guy was right of that. That's why I let him in. Bare in mind last time that happened dude's crank fell off and took me out.

What people have to remember is that there are a lot of rude, inconsiderate, unsociable people, frankly dicks, in London at any one given time. That extends to people who usually attach themselves to an emerging trend, like cycling.

Its odd because I really rarely experience this. There are a few people out there who are just obviously nutters (e.g. really tall gangly guy on slicked MTB with handlebar mounted radio who rides like a banshee and randomly yells at other road users along NKR), and the occasional rude, ultra competitive cyclist (Pearlescent Dolan guy, whatever happened to him after his accident?) but mostly other cyclists seem to be pretty neutral or friendly along my route. I stay clear of the "nodders" and they don't seem to get in my way. Most of them just seem totally oblivious to be honest.