A new phrase every day

124

Comments

  • jellybellywmb
    jellybellywmb Posts: 1,379
    He is so useless he could fall in a barrel of tits and come out sucking his thumb!
    "BEER" Proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    He's so unlucky, if he won a pot dog it'd sh1t on the shelf.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • takethehighroad
    takethehighroad Posts: 6,822
    "Put wood in 'oil, it's feckin baltic in 'ere"

    ^^^^That's Yorkshire for "Close the door it's cold"
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    "I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message".
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • dennisn
    dennisn Posts: 10,601
    I think, I think I am, therefore I am, I think.
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    I was sat there like a one man lepper colony.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • Red Rock
    Red Rock Posts: 517
    As daft as a jam and pickle butty
  • TheDrunkMonk
    TheDrunkMonk Posts: 181
    More than a slight misunderstanding:

    "Right end, wrong stick"
  • passout
    passout Posts: 4,425
    In answer to an obvious question,
    "Does the Pope sh*t in the woods?"
    'Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible' Marcel Proust.
  • passout
    passout Posts: 4,425
    He's got more front than...[insert name of regional seaside town]
    'Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible' Marcel Proust.
  • passout
    passout Posts: 4,425
    When God was handing out hand/eye coordination, he dropped it.
    'Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible' Marcel Proust.
  • passout
    passout Posts: 4,425
    Meat was cheap the day they made her
    'Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible' Marcel Proust.
  • nottscobb
    nottscobb Posts: 147
    I'd rather sh*t in my hands and clap!
  • Surf-Matt
    Surf-Matt Posts: 5,952
    Welsh accent needed:

    "And there it was - GONE!"
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Surf-Matt wrote:
    Welsh accent needed:

    "And there it was - GONE!"

    more...

    Vanished, like an old oak table....
  • jordan_217
    jordan_217 Posts: 2,580
    On being lectured for having a good perv (when married/in relationship etc):

    "If you max out your Visa, you can still go window shopping"
    “Training is like fighting with a gorilla. You don’t stop when you’re tired. You stop when the gorilla is tired.”
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    On marriage,

    Why buy a book, when there's a libary. :D
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • jordan_217
    jordan_217 Posts: 2,580
    Frank the tank wrote:
    On marriage,

    Why buy a book, when there's a libary. :D

    F'ing marvelous Frank! :D
    “Training is like fighting with a gorilla. You don’t stop when you’re tired. You stop when the gorilla is tired.”
  • jamazin
    jamazin Posts: 371
    F**k google ask mej
    Mabie forest. Maybe one of the greatest places to ride.
  • greasedscotsman
    greasedscotsman Posts: 6,962
    Faster than a rat out of an aqueduct...
  • meenaghman
    meenaghman Posts: 345
    A few Irish ones I've heard

    I feel like a boiled sh1te - hungover
    He's so mean he'd live in one ear and rent out the other
    He's so tight he could peel an orange in his pocket
    He thinks manual labour is a spanish politician
    shes got more chins than a chinese phone book
    Mother Teresa wouldn't kiss her
    If you gave her a kick up the hole a bucket of c*cks would fall out of her
    She'd make your c*ck so hard you could club a whale.
    She could breastfeed a creche
    Even the tide wouldn't take her out.
    sweating like a paedo in a barney suit
    As busy as the Dalkey dole office.
    He's so camp he'd sh!te tent pegs
  • pedylan
    pedylan Posts: 768
    Describing someone very crestfallen.

    He looked like somone had shit in his cap.
    Where the neon madmen climb
  • passout
    passout Posts: 4,425
    meenaghman wrote:
    A few Irish ones I've heard

    I feel like a boiled sh1te - hungover
    He's so mean he'd live in one ear and rent out the other
    He's so tight he could peel an orange in his pocket
    He thinks manual labour is a spanish politician
    shes got more chins than a chinese phone book
    Mother Teresa wouldn't kiss her
    If you gave her a kick up the hole a bucket of c*cks would fall out of her
    She'd make your c*ck so hard you could club a whale.
    She could breastfeed a creche
    Even the tide wouldn't take her out.
    sweating like a paedo in a barney suit
    As busy as the Dalkey dole office.
    He's so camp he'd sh!te tent pegs

    This post is the best thing since sliced bread!
    'Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible' Marcel Proust.
  • bagpusscp
    bagpusscp Posts: 2,907
    Nostalgia is not what it was but it soon will be.
    bagpuss
  • Jez mon
    Jez mon Posts: 3,809
    One tit short of an udder.
    You live and learn. At any rate, you live
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    Hucknall town won.

    Not a phrase, just a rarity. :lol:
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • Yorkshirecoal
    Yorkshirecoal Posts: 52
    As usefull as a dildo in a convent.

    That is the best thing my grandma ever told me. She still uses it today. Oh wait...
    *Insert something witty or profound here*
  • 2Phat4Rapha
    2Phat4Rapha Posts: 238
    I'm pink therefore I'm Spam.
    I may be a minority of one but that doesn't prevent me from being right.
    http://www.dalynchi.com
  • skyd0g
    skyd0g Posts: 2,540
    On describing a large, unattractive girl:

    She's like Iceland - everyone knows where she is, but no-one wants to go there.
    Cycling weakly
  • agent_buchwald
    agent_buchwald Posts: 256
    A few proper Devon phrases -

    summer....."it's as hot as a bag"
    winter........"it's as cold as a frog"
    drunk.........."he's as pissed as a mattress" OR "she's as pissed as a handcart"
    night..........."it's as dark as cow's guts"
    Look 566
    Dolan Hercules
    Genesis Flyer
    Sintesi 707
    Genesis Aether
    Charge Plug

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