A new phrase every day

135

Comments

  • Barkiesnake
    Barkiesnake Posts: 244
    with friends like him who needs enemas
    :D
    "If you think you can, or if you think you can't, your right" Henry Ford
  • man2wolf
    man2wolf Posts: 70
    During the last Ashes Test, one of the Aussie commentators referring to the weather, "Its as wet as an otters pocket"
  • dennisn
    dennisn Posts: 10,601
    OK I'll try

    "Hotter than a fresh f*cked fox in a forest fire"
    "Slicker than deer guts on a mountainside"
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    As queer as a concrete parachute.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • Easyriding
    Easyriding Posts: 56
    ...if he had one more brain cell he would be a banana...
  • Stewie Griffin
    Stewie Griffin Posts: 4,330
    While in a meeting which descended into an argument between our Manager and a Colleague. I sat there as quiet as a mouse, even when our Manager said to my colleague "I distinctly remember you not saying that". Confused? I certainly was :lol: .
  • Easyriding
    Easyriding Posts: 56
    ...I couldn't warm to him if he was on fire...
  • Homer J
    Homer J Posts: 920
    Rare as rocking horse shit
  • Percy Veere
    Percy Veere Posts: 53
    Dimmer than two TOC-H lamps in series....
  • Fastlad
    Fastlad Posts: 908
    She has a face like a plasterers radio..

    A fanny like a clowns pocket..

    He was into it like a dog eating beetroot...

    Slevering like a poachers dog..

    Sweating like Dr. Shipman in a old folks home..

    An arse so big...it should have a wide load sticker...

    He had a nose like f%ck nose..

    Tighter than a shark's arse..

    :wink:
  • neonwarhead
    neonwarhead Posts: 96
    And still no mention of a Wizard's Sleeve..!
  • Fastlad
    Fastlad Posts: 908
    Go on then....

    A fanny like a bill posters bucket!

    She had tits like spaniel's ears!

    She had nipples like monkey's fingers :roll:
  • Fastlad
    Fastlad Posts: 908
    He was into her like a tramp into a hot pie 8)
  • Fastlad
    Fastlad Posts: 908
    He was into her like a tramp into a hot pie 8)
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    from dodgeball on the kids aim with a ball,

    "you couldn't hit water if you fell out of boat"
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    As crafty as a cartload of monkey's

    I've seen more life in a tramps vest.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    Someone who has goofey teeth:- They could eat an apple through a letterbox.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • tebbit
    tebbit Posts: 604
    As much use as tits on a nun
  • Aggieboy
    Aggieboy Posts: 3,996
    "I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh1t"
    "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would be a pity to damage yours."
  • PhilofCas
    PhilofCas Posts: 1,153
    s/he's got "straight hair, with curly teeth", "walks with a lisp, got bowed elbows and ginger legs"
  • keef66
    keef66 Posts: 13,123
    sweating like a scouser in a job centre
  • robmanic1
    robmanic1 Posts: 2,150
    Sweating like a pregnant nun

    Innocent as OJ

    Guilty as a pupply sat next to a pile of poo
    Pictures are better than words because some words are big and hard to understand.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34335188@N07/3336802663/
  • themightyw
    themightyw Posts: 409
    Slight tangent, but some terrible chat up lines...

    "Are you a parking ticket? Cos you've got FINE written all over you."

    Alternatively...

    "Hi there, does this rag smell of chloroform to you?"
  • gordoncp
    gordoncp Posts: 994
    After you've been dumped:

    "Well, when you're sitting at home and the phone's not ringing, that's me not calling you."


    If he had another brain, it would be lonely.
  • GraemeT
    GraemeT Posts: 155
    A good description of some of my work colleagues:

    Over worked and under able

    Could do with an arse/elbow help kit
    Just Keep Pedalling
  • GraemeT
    GraemeT Posts: 155
    A good description of some of my work colleagues:

    Over worked and under able

    Could do with an arse/elbow help kit
    Just Keep Pedalling
  • GraemeT
    GraemeT Posts: 155
    Haha

    The double post was deliberate just to prove the point :oops:
    Just Keep Pedalling
  • Ruari
    Ruari Posts: 217
    teeth so bad he could eat an apple through a tennis racquet
    teeth like a burnt picket fence
    eyes like pools... mud pools
    hands like a bunch of bananas
    teeth are like stars... they come out at night
    face like a bag of crushed crabs
    ar$ like a bag of writhing ferrets
    ar$ like a sack of potatos
    'They call him 'Moonface''... 'Why, cos it's round?'...'No, cos it's got loads of craters!'
    FCN 1
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    If he had a white tooth he'd have a snooker set.
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • disquieting_museeuws
    disquieting_museeuws Posts: 601
    'Doesn't know if he's punch, bored, or counter-sunk'

    'Daft as old Kit Mullet'*

    'Dizzy as an owl'

    'Couldn't keep bl##dy chickens' (Matt Prior?)

    'Dark as Aegypt' (from my great-grandmother)

    'Queer as old Dick's hat'

    'Closed more gaps than a virgin in a brothel'.

    *who according to my grandad walked 5 miles to show her backside to a dead crow.

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