The Chuck Norris Thread
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that'll give you and chuck something in common.
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Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.92% of teenagers have turned to rap. If your one of the 8% that still listens to real music put this in your sig.0
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Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.92% of teenagers have turned to rap. If your one of the 8% that still listens to real music put this in your sig.0
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.92% of teenagers have turned to rap. If your one of the 8% that still listens to real music put this in your sig.0 -
Chuck norris can drink dehydrated water.I'm going to blow the bank on a new build ( within reason ) NOW DONE!!
http://i570.photobucket.com/albums/ss14 ... 010362.jpg0 -
Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.Ride it like you stole it!0
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Gok Wan used to get so turned on by watchin Chuck Norris fight, he came out of the closet0
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chuck Norris went into Burger King and asked for a Big Mac
And got one
Chuck Norris once got in touch with his feminine side
and instantly got it pregnant"I get paid to make other people suffer on my wheel, how good is that"
--Jens Voight0 -
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Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
I have so many of these...."The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. That way, you always have a couple of days in hand." - Bill Bailey0 -
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself."The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. That way, you always have a couple of days in hand." - Bill Bailey0
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Chuck Norris has been known to sell sand to the Arabs ans snow to Eskimos.0
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who said that turning water into wine was impressive??
Chuck Norris can turn piss into strongbow0 -
When Chuck Norris makes love to a woman, he has to stand 10 feet behind her.0
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Chuck Norris once brutally beat up my grandma
i shook his hand for doing it, Chuck knew she deserved it0 -
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month."The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. That way, you always have a couple of days in hand." - Bill Bailey0
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Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer...
It's a shame he doesn't cry0 -
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck NorrisRide it like you stole it!0
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Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris."It is not impossible, its just improbable"
Specialized Rockhopper Pro Disc 080 -
Proponents of higher-order theories of consciousness argue that consciousness is explained by the relation between two levels of mental states in which a higher-order mental state takes another mental state. If you mention this to Chuck Norris, expect an explosive roundhouse kick to the face for spouting too much fancy-talk."The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. That way, you always have a couple of days in hand." - Bill Bailey0
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Life is not, in fact, like a box of chocolates. It is more like a box of Chuck Norris, roundhouse kicking you in the face. And if you receive a box of Chuck Norris, you ALWAYS know what you are going to get.0
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Chuck Norris surfs on tsunami's
Mr Wu .....your post killed me..... 09 - Santa Cruz Heckler
03 - Trek 8500
95 - P7 (Dead, but I loved it)
Year dot - Alpine Stars CR300 - Still going strong...0
