Things that are just true about urban cycling
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As soon as you decide to filter into the ASL, the lights will change and you'll lose your spot and risk getting lefthooked :evil:
Also, there will always be at least one thing that makes you leave the cycle lane, such as plonkers sticking the nose of their car out, or the parking bays not being wide enough to fit the whole car in :evil:0 -
If the bus is stationary someone is about to step off irrespective of where the stop actually is.
The one that you slow down for is always the one that was letting you past.0 -
People wearing skinny jeans and super tiny handlebars WILL RLJ.FCN 3: Raleigh Record Ace fixie-to be resurrected sometime in the future
FCN 4: Planet X Schmaffenschmack 2- workhorse
FCN 9: B Twin Vitamin - winter commuter/loan bike for trainees
I'm hungry. I'm always hungry!0 -
Over time you will build a detailed mental map of usable railings, bike stands and lamposts but still none of them within 200 metres of Abra-Kebab-ra or the newsagents.0
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if a pedestrian controlled crossing has a red light - there will be no pedestrian on the crossing or within 50 yards of said crossing0
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Despite the fact that the girl in front is super hot and has a complete and utter peach of a bum you will sail on past just because you cannot bring yourself to slow your pace.0
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Aidy wrote:It will end up costing you more in shiny bike parts than it would by virtually any other method of getting to and from work.
Off topic but I worked with a guy who had a Ducati motorbike. I think his average service cost was about £900 - and he had to have 2 a year due to his 6000 miles a year covered. Nice bike though.
The one time you decide not to wear gloves is the one time you really wish you had (tarmac to hand pain - ouch)
You ride to work for a bit of exercise but somehow also seem to partake in a lot more visits to the pub as you no longer have to drive home.0 -
The bum at the light laughs when he sees it is a man on "spandex".
Note: It did happen to me and we were stupidly laughing at each other...0 -
if you clean your bike, it will rain the next time you ride it.0
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No matter which way you are going the wind will always be against you
You will arrive at work bright cheerful and pumping adrenaline and p*ss off all your colleagues who have been stuck in traffic for hours0 -
Aidy wrote:It will end up costing you more in shiny bike parts than it would by virtually any other method of getting to and from work.
+1,000,000.0 -
When trying to take a different route to work and nearly get lost you will encounter a cyclist coming the other way in a pitch black country lane who has no lights on?!0
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you are way better at it than all these other idiots.0
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Jonny_Trousers wrote:Despite the fact that the girl in front is super hot and has a complete and utter peach of a bum you will sail on past just because you cannot bring yourself to slow your pace.
not always..... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pU7JXX45pOw
(from about 3:20 min until.... well.... ages 8) )Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
2011 Trek Madone 4.5
2012 Felt F65X
Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter0 -
If your bike suffers a catastrophic failure, there will be no credit on your phone.0
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Average life expectancy for a packet of hobnobs after getting to work; 10 mins0
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If you build it, they will come.
Oh, I think i've got the wrong sport.Mud - Genesis Vapour CCX
Race - Fuji Norcom Straight
Sun - Cervelo R3
Winter / Commute - Dolan ADX0 -
Jonny_Trousers wrote:Despite the fact that the girl in front is super hot and has a complete and utter peach of a bum you will sail on past just because you cannot bring yourself to slow your pace.
not this (couldn't find a "perv" icon)0 -
double post0
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noisemonkey wrote:When trying to take a different route to work and nearly get lost you will encounter a cyclist coming the other way in a pitch black country lane who has no lights on?!
BAAAARP! urban cycling? On a a country lane? Sorry, but you bumpkin types need to stay off this metropolitan thread....0 -
If you choose to ride the Sunday Best bike into work for a change, there will be absolutely no competition to play with.
- 2023 Vielo V+1
- 2022 Canyon Aeroad CFR
- 2020 Canyon Ultimate CF SLX
- Strava
- On the Strand
- Crown Stables
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Without fail someone wearing white headphones and carrying a coffee cup will step out infront of you on Tooley Street!!FCN 8.0
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Kieran_Burns wrote:Jonny_Trousers wrote:Despite the fact that the girl in front is super hot and has a complete and utter peach of a bum you will sail on past just because you cannot bring yourself to slow your pace.
not always..... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pU7JXX45pOw
(from about 3:20 min until.... well.... ages 8) )
that commute looks absolutly horrible, give me my coutry lanes any day of the week
when your feeling tired and want an easy ride you will see a person on a bike (i hardly see any on commute) and you just have to chase them down
You get a smile if you pass a cyclist regardless of age, bike or gender0 -
You will always be the only road user travelling on the correct side of the road or path.
Especially if it's a cycle-only path.___________________________________________
People need to be told what to do so badly they'll listen to anyone0 -
Balancing the rear mech on the barrell adjuster to ensure smooth and quiet gear changes requires black magic.
Non Shamans (me) end up with the sound effects from the first ten mins of saving private ryan coupled with the smooth mechanical hum of a three house bricks and bag of nails in a washing machine.Fixed gear for wet weather / hairy roadie for posing in the sun.
What would Thora Hurd do?0 -
On the canal towpath at 3am there will always be a large man holding an axe but he hides well and you haven't seen him yet.'nulla tenaci invia est via'
FCN4
Boardman HT Pro fully X0'd
CUBE Peleton 2012
Genesis Aether 20 all season commuter0