Silly commuting racing

UndercoverElephant · June 2009

I'd like to propose an extension to SCR. Racing for pinks.

Anyone man (or woman) enough to race me on a 2 mile drag strip? You can claim my rather knackered £40 BSO if you win, and I'll take your ride when you fail to. In fact I think this should happen anyway if you are scalped by someone who's more than 10 points below you.

It may be my best shot to get a decent bike.

DonDaddyD · June 2009

T'was a mixed commute today and I ended up being late for work. But I learned that I now need a cadence meter so I can work on my pedal technique and regulate my cycling.

As much as I like having a choice of what bike to ride, I really need to set down some rules. I spent at least 10-15mins weighing the pro's and con's of riding my Kharma or my Giant. The Giant won out but I spent most of my commute comparing the different characteristic, trying to figure out what bike does what best....

Anywho, I picked up a rapid old guy on a hybrid, he looked fast but in reality he was just over-spinning a really small gear and I just powered away from him. What was annoying was the guy in a suit who decided to pass me at the lights and slow me down until the second set of lights where I dropped his ass. This was between South Wimbledon and Colliers Wood, you know who you are.

Somewhere between Colliers Wood and Tooting I picked up my old sparing partner on the red Voodoo Klein. I held him off until at the lights prior to my Tooting Balham drag where a clip-in incident meant he pipped me. I now push a bigger gear than him (thank you Kharma) so I dispatched him along the drag strip to maintain my title of King of that raod.

Pretty dead after that accept having to shout at a guy who was trying to undertake me. What people don't realise is that when you undertake, it forces you out wide and into traffic on the right.

Camberwell and I've met up with a Genesis SS and a Charge Plug - the old enemy. Along for the journey was a Polish looking chap on a cheap road bike with bull horns and gears. I get hampered by the lights but once green I dispatch all three. Ha! I guess I own that road to.

I do really need to work on my cadence, I can't pace myself....

jonginge · June 2009

Right. You can forget your beamers or audis, the worst drivers are in mini coopers. Boy/girl racer fucktards every one of them. OK, generalities over and down to cases: stupid in a red cooper on the NKR this am. Was waiting for the lights at the north end of col de putney bridge to green, sitting in primary about 5 cars back. They go, we go. Cars patiently pass the slow cyclists and I follow. Just past the bus stop I have the car behind giving it some on the horn. I swivel and realise from her frantic hand gestures she wants me to move over. I'm about a car's length behind the fellow in front and I'm wondering where she thinks she can go; I tell her as much in no uncertain terms. I then maintain primary station behind the car in front all the way to parsons green where she tries a crazy overtake; there was no gap to go into and the light is red. I'm way faster away from the lights and I don't see her again but hear her banging the horn from way back; some other poor unfortunate had raised her ire.

And relax.

biondino · June 2009

I have now ridden three commutes without a helmet. It feels nice. Hopefully my Inferno will arrive today (though more likely tomorrow). Nothing interesting to report on the commuting front, other than a chap on an MTB complimenting my frame. I think he meant the bike but I'll take it.

DonDaddyD · June 2009

Oh I forgot.

On Monday, at Balham heading to Tooting - my drag strip - I'm lined up with 10 other bikes. 10![/b Yay!

The lights go green, in these situations I like to hang back see how the field plays out. Some guy on a new Sirrus (exactly the same frame and pait job as the '09 Allez with a Flatbar - looks dreadful) starts to gun it, I look at him and think "you need a road bike and clipless if you're really going to do that" I dispatch him. I then continue along and see in the distance a group that went with the previous sequence of lights. I spin fast and furious, I catch them however I have no room to overtake and

I sh*t you not.

A moped was in my line blocking me from overtaking. I go around the moped, grin and spin like heaven and hell were trying to take me. I admit there was no way the moped was going 30mph but I got ahead of and the other cyclists and got to the lights on the drag strip to reclaim my crown.

I'm not saying I scalped a moped, I'll leave that for you all to decide.

roger_merriman · June 2009

biondino wrote:

I have now ridden three commutes without a helmet. It feels nice. Hopefully my Inferno will arrive today (though more likely tomorrow). Nothing interesting to report on the commuting front, other than a chap on an MTB complimenting my frame. I think he meant the bike but I'll take it.

is a lovely looking bike that. even with what ever saddle you've put on it? pink wasn't the threat?

blu3cat · June 2009

a couple of scalps this morning, a roadie on a trek (he looked knackered and may well have done a lot of miles to my 9) a very shiny SS, and a small incident similar to the mini cooper incident mentioned previously with a total w*nker in a SAAB (although he was nowhere near as persistant as previously mentioned mini driver)

Actually got let out and given space by a WVM (which I thanked him for) - What is the world coming to?

King Donut · June 2009

Had a nice group of 4 going this morning, heading along NKR, turn on to embankment. Guy from rear pulls to the front and… hang on a minute, is he collecting roadkill in his courier bag? I’ve never smelt anything like it. Decimated the chain gang. Does he not realise why no one wants to play with him?

Maybe someone told him to MTFU and he thought they meant leave the same clothes on for a week’s commuting in height of summer.

Roastie · June 2009

lost_in_thought wrote:

Or, a great new discovery, a spray called 'duck oil' - spray on, leave overnight to soak, stuck things come undone easy as pie the next day!

I'll have to try that - I need to loosen the seatpost on an old MTB I have knocking about as a mate (who is about a foot taller than the previous rider of this bike

) wants to borrow it to try out this commuting lark.

itboffin · June 2009

Greg66 wrote:

itboffin wrote:

Yup as I suspected a crap journey home, started the minute I left the office every car & bus on the road tried to kill me including a truck that passed me so close I could feel the paintwork yet the the road was completely empty, I caught him at the lights and explained a few FACTS about his parentage.

Then on the train some moron with a Halfords pile of crap used my bike as a rest for his and took a large chunk of paint off the top tube :twisted:

An finally the swarms of tiny flies on the way home were so bad I actually came off my bike twice, arriving home with eye so swollen I could barely see, then spent a painful hour trying to scrape bug remains off my eyeballs with a cotton bud :?

I'm ret fecked off and seriously contemplating taking the car for the rest of the week :evil:

Oh, FFS.

Does this really need to be said?

Take a good look at yourself in the mirror. Then

M

T

F

U.

:twisted:

Who rattled your cage you old barsteward?

Have your meds worn off

itboffin · June 2009

I was an hour late for work this morning due to an unscheduled stop in Condors new store drooooollll I heart that place BIG time, I'm going to buy a bike from them just because I love the customer service and all the small shiny things they stock.

LiT's it's true they come in 3 sizes, I now have all 3 just in case and a bunch of stuff I didn't really need including some assos cream which really is strangely tingly but not unpleasant

Clever Pun · June 2009

brompton today... destroyed 3 mtb'ers and a nice prize when at the lights adude on a tourer I whipped him at the lights and left him for dead... not technically a scalp but he'll be questioning his manliness for a few weeks to come.

be warned I'm out on the embankment tonight and I'm expecting to make a necklace of all the scalps I'll be taking

gtvlusso · June 2009

itboffin wrote:

some assos cream which really is strangely tingly but not unpleasant

Did you try before you bought?! Quick reach down with a dab on your finger?! Holy cow, you are hardcore....!

cjcp · June 2009

Clever Pun wrote:

brompton today... destroyed 3 mtb'ers and a nice prize when at the lights adude on a tourer I whipped him at the lights and left him for dead... not technically a scalp but he'll be questioning his manliness for a few weeks to come.

Oh yeah. He's closed the door and blinds at work, and is now standing at the window, looking out into the City, slowing shaking his head wondering WTF went wrong.

be warned I'm out on the embankment tonight and I'm expecting to make a necklace of all the scalps I'll be taking

Time? What will we see first: facial hair or a mad lunatic going like the clappers on a Bromie?

benno68 · June 2009

Had to resort to playing with myself again today :roll: , no one about except the usual pootler's. The wind was rough today and was a real battle along Penarth Road.

Saw a female cycle courier who was carrying a truly huge parcel and was keeping a good pace - her boss should have given her a trailer for that - chapeau young lady!

I scalped one of her colleagues yesterday morning though. He was on a road bike giving it some, jumped up and onto the pavement at red lights but some peds slowed him down. The lights went green and I was on my way having leant on a lampost to stay clipped in

, he jumped off the pavement 10 yards ahead of me but I'd got up to a decent pace and passed him at 25mph, acknowledging each other as I passed, held onto 25+ for about 400 yards or so before turning right onto Corbett Road.

lost_in_thought · June 2009

itboffin wrote:

I was an hour late for work this morning due to an unscheduled stop in Condors new store drooooollll I heart that place BIG time, I'm going to buy a bike from them just because I love the customer service and all the small shiny things they stock.

LiT's it's true they come in 3 sizes, I now have all 3 just in case and a bunch of stuff I didn't really need including some assos cream which really is strangely tingly but not unpleasant

Huh, well there you go! I shall head over there at lunchtime with the bicycle in question... and ask them if they do their 'tempo' in a colour that's not blue. I really don't like blue.

cjcp · June 2009

Benno68 wrote:

Had to resort to playing with myself again today :roll: , no one about except the usual pootler's. The wind was rough today and was a real battle along Penarth Road.

Saw a female cycle courier who was carrying a truly huge parcel and was keeping a good pace - her boss should have given her a trailer for that - chapeau young lady!

I scalped one of her colleagues yesterday morning though. He was on a road bike giving it some, jumped up and onto the pavement at red lights but some peds slowed him down. The lights went green and I was on my way having leant on a lampost to stay clipped in , he jumped off the pavement 10 yards ahead of me but I'd got up to a decent pace and passed him at 25mph, acknowledging each other as I passed, held onto 25+ for about 400 yards or so before turning right onto Corbett Road.

Benno - might be down in Cardiff in July. Might only be able to get out for an hour or so on the Saturday evening or Sunday morning for a quick blast out to Wenvoe or something, but will let you know in case you can make it.

jedster · June 2009

Now I think all this stereotyping drivers into good and bad depending upon what car they drive is a load of old ballcocks. My wife keep telling me that drivers of x are the worst on the road. x keeps changing depending on who p1ssed her off last.

Except of course this

Right. You can forget your beamers or audis, the worst drivers are in mini coopers. Boy/girl racer fucktards every one of them

which is simply a TRUE FACT.

Every flippin' last one of them in London thinks they are in the shaggin Italian Job. "Look at me in my sporty yet endearingly cute car and all the fun I am having". THey can all fook off.

Nurse!

J

cjcp · June 2009

jedster wrote:

Now I think all this stereotyping drivers into good and bad depending upon what car they drive is a load of old ballcocks. My wife keep telling me that drivers of x are the worst on the road. x keeps changing depending on who p1ssed her off last.

Except of course this

Right. You can forget your beamers or audis, the worst drivers are in mini coopers. Boy/girl racer fucktards every one of them

which is simply a TRUE FACT.

Every flippin' last one of them in London thinks they are in the shaggin Italian Job. "Look at me in my sporty yet endearingly cute car and all the fun I am having". THey can all fook off.

Nurse!

J

Often driven by estate agents in SW London.

Bizarrely, I encountered a little racer in a Mini Cooper on the north side of Col de Putney Bridge this morning too. Separate incident to JG's though.

Clever Pun · June 2009

cjcp wrote:

Clever Pun wrote:

brompton today... destroyed 3 mtb'ers and a nice prize when at the lights adude on a tourer I whipped him at the lights and left him for dead... not technically a scalp but he'll be questioning his manliness for a few weeks to come.

Oh yeah. He's closed the door and blinds at work, and is now standing at the window, looking out into the City, slowing shaking his head wondering WTF went wrong.

be warned I'm out on the embankment tonight and I'm expecting to make a necklace of all the scalps I'll be taking

Time? What will we see first: facial hair or a mad lunatic going like the clappers on a Bromie?

what you'll see first is my side profile as I cruise past checking my watch or playing with the beard

about 6...ish is when I'll set off

biondino · June 2009

jedster wrote:

Now I think all this stereotyping drivers into good and bad depending upon what car they drive is a load of old ballcocks. My wife keep telling me that drivers of x are the worst on the road. x keeps changing depending on who p1ssed her off last.

Except of course this

Right. You can forget your beamers or audis, the worst drivers are in mini coopers. Boy/girl racer fucktards every one of them

which is simply a TRUE FACT.

Every flippin' last one of them in London thinks they are in the shaggin Italian Job. "Look at me in my sporty yet endearingly cute car and all the fun I am having". THey can all fook off.

Nurse!

J

What it is, I think, is they think "ooh, I'm in a tiny, nippy car so I can basically drive like I'm on a motorbike, squeezing into spaces cars shouldn't go near and trying to out-accelerate bikes at the lights". No, you can't, you clueless tossers.

il_principe · June 2009

Plus the new mini isn't exactly "mini" it's bloody huge.

Porgy · June 2009

I had some tosser in a Smart car thinking he could drive up the cycle lane a while ago - I soon put him straight on that idea! :twisted:

tardington · June 2009

I really really like the mini clubman.

roger_merriman · June 2009

Il Principe wrote:

Plus the new mini isn't exactly "mini" it's bloody huge.

any thing thats over a ton, really has no right to be called mini....

this said i quite like their looks though they are a bit of a reverse tardis inside apparently.

Cafewanda · June 2009

itboffin wrote:

Yup as I suspected a crap journey home, started the minute I left the office every car & bus on the road tried to kill me including a truck that passed me so close I could feel the paintwork yet the the road was completely empty, I caught him at the lights and explained a few FACTS about his parentage. *

An finally the swarms of tiny flies on the way home were so bad I actually came off my bike twice, arriving home with eye so swollen I could barely see, then spent a painful hour trying to scrape bug remains off my eyeballs with a cotton bud :?

* Elegantly put, although I had to read it twice before I 'got' it :roll:

How about adding protective goggles to your summer wardrobe? The flies would bounce off wouldn't they?

Christophe3967 · June 2009

biondino wrote:

jedster wrote:

Now I think all this stereotyping drivers into good and bad depending upon what car they drive is a load of old ballcocks. My wife keep telling me that drivers of x are the worst on the road. x keeps changing depending on who p1ssed her off last.

Except of course this

Right. You can forget your beamers or audis, the worst drivers are in mini coopers. Boy/girl racer fucktards every one of them

which is simply a TRUE FACT.

Every flippin' last one of them in London thinks they are in the shaggin Italian Job. "Look at me in my sporty yet endearingly cute car and all the fun I am having". THey can all fook off.

Nurse!

J

What it is, I think, is they think "ooh, I'm in a tiny, nippy car so I can basically drive like I'm on a motorbike, squeezing into spaces cars shouldn't go near and trying to out-accelerate bikes at the lights". No, you can't, you clueless tossers.

They're hoping to be spotted by Foxtons' talent scouts - now those boys and girls know how to drive

Citizen Smith · June 2009

I have a Mini Cooper. :shock:

benno68 · June 2009

cjcp wrote:

Benno68 wrote:

Had to resort to playing with myself again today :roll: , no one about except the usual pootler's. The wind was rough today and was a real battle along Penarth Road.

Saw a female cycle courier who was carrying a truly huge parcel and was keeping a good pace - her boss should have given her a trailer for that - chapeau young lady!

I scalped one of her colleagues yesterday morning though. He was on a road bike giving it some, jumped up and onto the pavement at red lights but some peds slowed him down. The lights went green and I was on my way having leant on a lampost to stay clipped in , he jumped off the pavement 10 yards ahead of me but I'd got up to a decent pace and passed him at 25mph, acknowledging each other as I passed, held onto 25+ for about 400 yards or so before turning right onto Corbett Road.

Benno - might be down in Cardiff in July. Might only be able to get out for an hour or so on the Saturday evening or Sunday morning for a quick blast out to Wenvoe or something, but will let you know in case you can make it.

Sounds great CJ - either would be fine but I don't get home from work on Saturday until 6:45pm. Sunday morning would be better if possible.

Bassjunkieuk · June 2009

Il Principe wrote:

Plus the new mini isn't exactly "mini" it's bloody huge.

I'm sure I heard somewhere that the new "Mini" has the same wheelbase as a Range Rover :-D

The only other cyclist on my commute this morning was a high-vis clad dude who was going so slow he was practically riding backwards. I spotted him as I wheeled the bike out of the school after dropping up the eldest mini-BJUK (in all honesty she could well have scalped this guy actually.......). I casually hopped on and had him within 200 yards, I think the bigger surprise tho was that car driver behind me seemed to realize I wanted to pass him and held off overtaking me leaving me plenty of space to come round the slow dude :-D

Silly commuting racing

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