The Irony Thread

pblakeneypblakeney Posts: 9,810
edited 18 October in The cake stop
As a start, I give you this:-

"German prosecutors say they would accept an offer of $100m (£60m) from Formula 1 chief Bernie Ecclestone to end his trial on bribery charges."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-28656050
The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
I am not sure. You have no chance.
veronese68 wrote:
PB is the most sensible person on here.
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Posts

  • arran77arran77 Posts: 9,260
    African farmers who grow and harvest cacao beans have no clue what their beans are used for and most farmers are too poor to even afford a single bar of chocolate :shock:

    http://www.onegreenplanet.org/news/cocoa-farmer-tastes-chocolate-for-the-first-time/
    "Arran, you are like the Tony Benn of smut. You have never diluted your depravity and always stand by your beliefs. You have my respect sir and your wife my pity" :lol:

    seanoconn
  • nathancomnathancom Posts: 1,567
    It is sad but then do they appear any more or less happy than most Brits?
  • ProssPross Posts: 21,040
    stock-photo-17644228-brunette-pinup-model-on-a-white-background-ironing.jpg
  • arran77arran77 Posts: 9,260
    Pross wrote:
    stock-photo-17644228-brunette-pinup-model-on-a-white-background-ironing.jpg

    How much does she charge per hour :D
    "Arran, you are like the Tony Benn of smut. You have never diluted your depravity and always stand by your beliefs. You have my respect sir and your wife my pity" :lol:

    seanoconn
  • ProssPross Posts: 21,040
    Not enough to afford an ironing board or electrical socket by the look of it!
  • ballysmateballysmate Posts: 13,026
    Eco friendly uni adds to its carbon footprint.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... blaze.html
  • pblakeneypblakeney Posts: 9,810
    ballysmate wrote:
    Eco friendly uni adds to its carbon footprint.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... blaze.html
    Carbon neutral in 25 years and lasted -1 year. That is a lot of positive carbons. :lol:
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
    I am not sure. You have no chance.
    veronese68 wrote:
    PB is the most sensible person on here.
  • I do some work at that campus. The buildings have fancy ground source heating and a cooling system powered from a lake nearby. They don't work very well so every office has its own air con unit and heaters. Not very eco friendly.
  • ballysmateballysmate Posts: 13,026
    Just seen Ed Balls on ten o clock news.
    He was moaning that if they get elected, Labour will be have to deal with the legacy of the Tories failing to cut the deficit. That's right, the deficit he helped to run up.
    Credit where it's due though, he managed to say it without blushing or laughing.
  • ballysmate wrote:
    Just seen Ed Balls on ten o clock news.
    He was moaning that if they get elected......
    I don't think he'll lose too much sleep over it, he knows they won't get elected until most of the people who remember last Labour debacle have died. Ironically, the Tory NHS plans will help to kill them off quite quickly.
  • Stevo_666Stevo_666 Posts: 36,216
    ballysmate wrote:
    Just seen Ed Balls on ten o clock news.
    He was moaning that if they get elected, Labour will be have to deal with the legacy of the Tories failing to cut the deficit. That's right, the deficit he helped to run up.
    Credit where it's due though, he managed to say it without blushing or laughing.
    He will 'deal' with it though - he'll increase it. It's what they do best.

    Edit: the Tories have cut the deficit, but not the national debt. As long as the annual deficit is a deficit and not a surplus, the total national debt grows each year as the country has to borrow the difference. What we need is surpluses again, obviously.
    Whippet
    Bruiser
    Panzer
    Commuter

    "I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]
  • Graham.Graham. Posts: 862
    Perhaps we should, you know, start making stuff that we can sell for a profit, and maybe employ a few people to make said stuff, who will will pay a bit of tax on their earnings while still being able to afford to buy other stuff made by other people who are employed to do so.....See where I'm going with this?
  • finchyfinchy Posts: 6,889
    An omnipotent god needs humans armed with Kalashnikovs to do his bidding whenever he gets insulted.
  • capt_slogcapt_slog Posts: 3,120
    arran77 wrote:
    Pross wrote:
    stock-photo-17644228-brunette-pinup-model-on-a-white-background-ironing.jpg

    How much does she charge per hour :D

    No use here if she doesn't know how things plug in. :wink:
    The older I get, the better I was.

    Call it "booty" if you like, to me it's still a fat @rse.
  • finchyfinchy Posts: 6,889
    Capt Slog wrote:
    arran77 wrote:
    Pross wrote:
    stock-photo-17644228-brunette-pinup-model-on-a-white-background-ironing.jpg

    How much does she charge per hour :D

    No use here if she doesn't know how things plug in. :wink:

    I think she's just looking around for an adaptor.
  • pblakeneypblakeney Posts: 9,810
    512xIw1iL6L.jpg
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
    I am not sure. You have no chance.
    veronese68 wrote:
    PB is the most sensible person on here.
  • tim wandtim wand Posts: 2,945
    Tory Government elected on a 36% majority in an election only 38% of the electorate turned out for! Want to pass legislation to make Trade Unions have a 50% majority of a 60% minimum vote, to take legitimate actions.

    But first they will rubber stamp their 11% pay recommendation, Before using new Trade Union laws to silence the unions whilst changing everyone elses terms and conditions for the worse.

    And just because some feckin southerners had to make do without the tube for a weekend.
  • Sirius631Sirius631 Posts: 1,015
    To err is human, but to make a real balls up takes a super computer.
  • bompingtonbompington Posts: 6,790
    Tory Government elected on a 36% majority in an election only 38% of the electorate turned out for! Want to pass legislation to make Trade Unions have a 50% majority of a 60% minimum vote, to take legitimate actions.

    But first they will rubber stamp their 11% pay recommendation, Before using new Trade Union laws to silence the unions whilst changing everyone elses terms and conditions for the worse.

    And just because some feckin southerners had to make do without the tube for a weekend.
    Someone posting on an irony thread who hasn't even spotted that their figures are wrong, thus compleely negating their argument, maybe?
    A 66% turnout is rather a long way from 38%. And a first past the post election with several major parties cannot be compared to a binary yes/no vote. Not to mention that a 36.9% vote share is 37% when you quote it rounded to a whole number.
    Apart from that, you've got a point.
  • capt_slogcapt_slog Posts: 3,120
    We now have cameras that are compact and have high resolution, either Go-Pro type things or the ones built into mobile phones. They are small and convenient.

    Yet some people carry them around like this....

    Selfie-Stick-540x446.jpg

    all the time, even when they are not taking 'selfies'.
    The older I get, the better I was.

    Call it "booty" if you like, to me it's still a fat @rse.
  • orraloonorraloon Posts: 5,271
    Seeing as how it's now 20 years since its release, and to continue with the resurrection theme...

    Alanis Morissette and her song 'Ironic'.

    To quote Ed Byrne, "The only ironic thing about that song is it's called 'Ironic' and it's written by a woman who doesn't know what irony is. That's quite ironic."
  • chris_basschris_bass Posts: 4,855
    Seeing as how it's now 20 years since its release, and to continue with the resurrection theme...

    Alanis Morissette and her song 'Ironic'.

    To quote Ed Byrne, "The only ironic thing about that song is it's called 'Ironic' and it's written by a woman who doesn't know what irony is. That's quite ironic."

    I could be wrong but wasn't the whole point of the song that none of it was ironic?
    www.conjunctivitis.com - a site for sore eyes
  • floreriderflorerider Posts: 1,046
    Americans care about emissions.
  • tim wandtim wand Posts: 2,945
    Tory Government elected on a 36% majority in an election only 38% of the electorate turned out for! Want to pass legislation to make Trade Unions have a 50% majority of a 60% minimum vote, to take legitimate actions.

    But first they will rubber stamp their 11% pay recommendation, Before using new Trade Union laws to silence the unions whilst changing everyone elses terms and conditions for the worse.

    And just because some feckin southerners had to make do without the tube for a weekend.
    Someone posting on an irony thread who hasn't even spotted that their figures are wrong, thus compleely negating their argument, maybe?
    A 66% turnout is rather a long way from 38%. And a first past the post election with several major parties cannot be compared to a binary yes/no vote. Not to mention that a 36.9% vote share is 37% when you quote it rounded to a whole number.
    Apart from that, you've got a point.


    Got me there. I read both figures, Your right it was 66.1 % Turn out. I ll go for Rebekah Brooks returning to work and News International. Head honcho of an organisation rife with phone hacking but " didn't have a clue about it!". But still felt the need to hide all her laptops in Pizza takeaway boxes!!!!!!
  • ballysmateballysmate Posts: 13,026
    “I have a big problem, I can’t write, so I don’t keep anything. I’m the most disorganized person and I’m ashamed to say in the world, I can’t work a computer, I don’t know what an email is, I can’t, I have never sent a fax and I’ve never sent a text message.

    Harry Redknapp at his tax evasion trial in 2012.

    Obviously been working hard to learn.

    https://twitter.com/redknapp
  • chris_basschris_bass Posts: 4,855
    ballysmate wrote:
    “I have a big problem, I can’t write, so I don’t keep anything. I’m the most disorganized person and I’m ashamed to say in the world, I can’t work a computer, I don’t know what an email is, I can’t, I have never sent a fax and I’ve never sent a text message.

    Harry Redknapp at his tax evasion trial in 2012.

    Obviously been working hard to learn.

    https://twitter.com/redknapp

    And him and his family were advertising a computer game, which I assume he couldn't work!
    www.conjunctivitis.com - a site for sore eyes
  • earthearth Posts: 934
    Capt Slog wrote:
    We now have cameras that are compact and have high resolution, either Go-Pro type things or the ones built into mobile phones. They are small and convenient.

    Yet some people carry them around like this....

    Selfie-Stick-540x446.jpg

    all the time, even when they are not taking 'selfies'.

    So they are for taking selfies are they? I thought they were for taking action golf photos. :lol:
  • ProssPross Posts: 21,040
    In much the same vein as the OP, Rolls Royce paying £660 million to avoid prosecution for bribery and corruption.
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