New Dad advice: How do you fit in weekend rides?

davis

Meh. How the DDDs actually communicate isn't likely to make too much difference IMHO; they can obviously manage to communicate without our help!

Actually, DDD, get her to sign up here. You'll be talking non-stop!

kelsen

DonDaddyD wrote:

I wouldn't read too much into the approach.

This reminds me of the chap who asked the forum if a turbo trainer would be a good present for his wife who'd just recently given birth.

I hope you know Ms DDD re-eally well!

clarkey cat

This reminds me of the chap who asked the forum if a turbo trainer would be a good present for his wife who'd just recently given birth.

heh heh - that was me. LOL.

davis

kelsen wrote:

DonDaddyD wrote:

I wouldn't read too much into the approach.

This reminds me of the chap who asked the forum if a turbo trainer would be a good present for his wife who'd just recently given birth.

You didn't spot the joke, then? :-)

tailwindhome

DonDaddyD wrote:

I wouldn't read too much into the approach.

Has she responded yet?

If not PRETEND IT WAS A JOKE.

If she has, then you've got a good 'un. Pretend it was a joke when you get home.



How much weekend riding were you doing last year?

redvee

TailWindHome wrote:

How much weekend riding were you doing last year?

Too much if he's now a Dad

itboffin

I'm gobsmacked by most of the replies apart from IP who as usually is talking sense, DDD what the hell were you both talking about in the 9 sex free months?

No one unless they are ill needs to sleep in til 11-12 every weekend, take it in turns.

I must ask so how often / regular were you riding at the weekend before the little one arrived?

If you haven't laid the ground rules by now you is FARKED.

gabriel959

itboffin wrote:

I'm gobsmacked by most of the replies apart from IP who as usually is talking sense, DDD what the hell were you both talking about in the 9 sex free months?

No one unless they are ill needs to sleep in til 11-12 every weekend, take it in turns.

I must ask so how often / regular were you riding at the weekend before the little one arrived?

If you haven't laid the ground rules by now you is FARKED.

9 sex free months? that must be a joke, its the best time to have sex!

jejv

AshleyMadison.com ?

asprilla

You need to work on brownie points and kids can help with that.

I've trained TMP to say 'my mummy' whenever she sees a princess in a book and the follow it up quickly with 'I like daddy riding his bike'. It's great.

EKE_38BPM

jejv wrote:

AshleyMadison.com ?

If I get into trouble for going onto that site, you're going to get multiple visits from the PF.

jejv

Get a bike seat, put the little one in it, an go for a run. In our case maybe with older sibling.

Soon little one will be saying:

"Daddy, Daddy - TT bike is blown. May I have its Scalp ?"

Easier for me to say in the South of Cambridge, when it doesn't take long to get out of town.

But you get to ride the bike, maybe go somewhere kids want to go, and the extra weight can only be good training.

And you earn brownie points with the OH.

jejv

EKE_38BPM wrote:

jejv wrote:

AshleyMadison.com ?

If I get into trouble for going onto that site, you're going to get multiple visits from the PF.

If you don't get into trouble, a nice bottle of Saint Emillon Grand Cru, or maybe Haut Medoc, would slip down nicely.

london-red

Good thread.

We're lucky enough to have two of the little buggers - one almost 3 and the other 9 months. I find it almost impossible to get out for a weekend ride, unless we have family down to help at the w/e.

When I do get out, it's a 8am start, back by 12.30 job, and I'll probably grab half a dozen of those this year and a couple of sportives. Happy with that, TBH.

Interestingly, the gatekeeper says that a later start and finish is actually better as it's the morning mayhem which is the hardest part to deal with.

So, logic says late evening rides in the summer could work quite well. My problem with this is that I probably enjoy afternoon beers at the w/e with wife and friends just as much as getting out on the bike. Maybe more

rjsterry

gabriel959 wrote:

itboffin wrote:

I'm gobsmacked by most of the replies apart from IP who as usually is talking sense, DDD what the hell were you both talking about in the 9 sex free months?

No one unless they are ill needs to sleep in til 11-12 every weekend, take it in turns.

I must ask so how often / regular were you riding at the weekend before the little one arrived?

If you haven't laid the ground rules by now you is FARKED.

9 sex free months? that must be a joke, its the best time to have sex!

Not for DDD - not his thing apparently. To think that I even know this... :shock:

DonDaddyD

Wow 3 pages. OK, in order of importance.

1). Sex during the 9 months, especially the latter months, just seems icky. There isn't too much I consider icky. Gabriel I really don't understand how you can think it's the best time...

2). During our pregnancy Ms DDD and I did talk a number of times about 'things that must change' cycling wasn't on the list of 'must change'. We, well I agreed, that we would first see how things went with the baby (no one can know what type of baby and how much help she'll need. This baby is a DDD afterall) and then I would factor in my cycling and other past times. In anticipation of reduced freetime it's why I gave up the online computer games and stopped collecting half my comics.

I put it to the board just to see how you divided the time, the approach you used to do this and how you posed the question. Turns out cycling has been elevated in my list of free time priorities and probably my only other hobby alongside comic books, which is slowly dying.

3). Last year I didn't ride either of my bikes nearly enough. Recent tests mean that must change.

4). She agreed her exact words "hun, I know it's something you love. Why would I keep you from doing it?" The comprimise is: Saturdays she gets a lay-in, Sundays (every other week or two) I get to ride my bike for 2-3hrs as well as sportives/charity rides.

Gazzaputt

She got a baby I got a new bike

I ride with my club and a Saturday and Sunday go out early for a couple of hours. Once per month I'll ride a sportive. Wednesday evenings when kids are at the in-laws it's circuit time.

I cycled long before the kids and no way are they interrupting it.

SO usually meets up with other mums from nursery on a Saturday so all happy.

Wrath Rob

Echoing earlier posts, I look after the kids on Saturday morning so she has the morning off. We then do family stuff in the afternoon. Sunday is role reversal, she has the kids in the morning and I try and go for a ride. If we're going away for the weekend, I'm now at the stage where I'll try and ride to where we're going, have a shower there and then drive the car home.

That plus going for a couple of longer rides on the way home seems to be working for me.

BigJimmyB

I take my opportunities either before or after kids are in bed.

Saturdays, I may go out early and let the dog chase me through the woods for 45 mins - I get some time on the bike, he gets a 'walk'.

I do think if you get up at 5am all week DDD that you should get either a ride or lie-in over the weekend - you must be knackered. You probably need to sit down and discuss. Tell her how important it is for you and agree some kind of schedule.

Good luck!

tailwindhome

DonDaddyD wrote:

She agreed her exact words "hun, I know it's something you love. Why would I keep you from doing it?"

IT'S A TRAP!!!!!

The comprimise is: Saturdays she gets a lay-in, Sundays (every other week or two) I get to ride my bike for 2-3hrs as well as sportives/charity rides.

Our house is

Saturday - Family stuff and getting stuff done

Sunday - Cycling time and Family lunch/dinner

Cycling time may be a club run, a sportive or taking the kids MTB racing.

We have 4 kids.....no one gets a lie in, ever.

rick_chasey

You guys all do so much with your kids.

When I was a kid, weekends would go like this "Mum, Dad i'm BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED"

"go find something to do."

"BUT I'M SO BOOOOOOOORED"

Repeat.

If you didn't entertain yourself, you were going to be bored.

clarkey cat

a book I really enjoyed called the Escape Artist looks at the balance of being a cyclist and raising a family in a really good way... I'd recommend it! He's a local lad too - based in Camberwell IIRC.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Escape-Artist-L ... 1841151041

il_principe

I plan on moving back to East Sussex before having kids, or at least before they hit 2/3 yrs old. I can see that raising kids in a London flat/house with a tiny garden must be all sorts of hassle. Just need to convince the wife who's a born and bred city girl...

My folks didn't need to worry about entertaining us when I grew up, we just mucked about outdoors most of the day, or the old man would take us to the farm with him. When you're a little boy, tractors, combines etc are ridiculously entertaining, that and clinging on to the back of a quad bike at 30mph+ Thankfully my Dad wasn't really troubled by any notions of health and safety.

the_fuggler

meanredspider wrote:

Advice from a 3x dad (at one point I had 3 kids under the age of 4): start by accepting that you probably won't be able to ride - then grab opportunities as bonuses as and when they arise. It'll make you feel a lot better about it all.

This - I tend to get some grace in the two weekends before my one Sportive of the year. The only other time is if the Outlaws are up or in the late evenings in the height of summer. It does make those rides extra special - almost illicit. Outside of those times I've come to accept that opportunities will be very few and far between.

jedster

Frankly, it is really tough to find 2-3 hours of free time when the kids are young. Particularly if you both work or you work long hours in the week. It does get easier as the children get a bit older but it is still not easy.

My work and commute means I don't see much of my 9 and 7 year olds in the week (a few minutes in the morning - which is important - and the occasional bed-time when I knock off early). What this means for me is that my weekend time is really about the family. We either socialise as a family or after the kids are asleep (babysitters and grandparents are life savers). Exercise? Well it tends to be short, sharp stuff like a run or a quick game of squash - cycling is very time consuming. I have been out for the odd longer weekend ride but it tends to be a special occasion not a regular thing. I find it better to get out in the evening rather than the morning - the kids really want to see Daddy first thing - I'm a bit less of a novelty by the end of the day. The other thing is to be creative - sometimes if we're heading to my in-laws I'll cycle there and sling the bike in the back of the car for the trip home.

I did train for a marathon when my kids were little (youngest was a baby). Most of my runs were in the evening. My weekly long run was during the weekend day time. It wasn't easy and caused a bit of friction even though it was my wife who put my entry in! Frankly I didnt get enough training miles done.

Cycle commuting is a life saver!

NGale

Il Principe wrote:

I plan on moving back to East Sussex before having kids, or at least before they hit 2/3 yrs old. I can see that raising kids in a London flat/house with a tiny garden must be all sorts of hassle. Just need to convince the wife who's a born and bred city girl...

My folks didn't need to worry about entertaining us when I grew up, we just mucked about outdoors most of the day, or the old man would take us to the farm with him. When you're a little boy, tractors, combines etc are ridiculously entertaining, that and clinging on to the back of a quad bike at 30mph+ Thankfully my Dad wasn't really troubled by any notions of health and safety.

That's what Brighton is for. A decent sized city, beach and countryside on the doorstep and London only up the road if you ever feel you have the weird urge to go there.

clarkey cat

No - thats what Surrey is for.

Can still work in London - and if you get the cojones you can still commute too.
Nice countryside, the hills are great.

The only problem is getting a mother and baby parking space at Waitrose but, y'know, you roll with the punches.

NGale

clarkey cat wrote:

The only problem is getting a mother and baby parking space at Waitrose but, y'know, you roll with the punches.

well problems solved there...the other 200 flipping parking spaces in the car park

clarkey cat

My Land Rover Super Vogue is so wide I can only park in disabled or mother and baby spaces and feel confident that some scrote isnt going to scratch the matt paint job.

NGale

clarkey cat wrote:

My Land Rover Super Vogue is so wide I can only park in disabled or mother and baby spaces and feel confident that some scrote isnt going to scratch the matt paint job.

smaller car then