Money managing and the baby

blu3cat

Veronese68 wrote:

Feeding a 13 year old boy that has been growing about an inch a month for most of this year certainly doesn't help finances. The amount that boy can eat is terrifying.

Would a restricted calorie diet stop his rapid growth as well, cutting food and clothing costs??

Pep

GenevaCamper wrote:

I've set up our finances so that 75% of my salary goes into the joint account that pays the rent, bills and anything for Mrs and Junior.

I hope not to be found offensive or nosy or rude but ...

... do people have one joint account with their spouse and one individual one?
Why?

My wife and I have only one joint account. Our money goes into it and out of it. That's it. There is only OUR finances, not MINE and HERS.

greg66_tri_v2.0

DonDaddyD wrote:

I'm just curious as to how people mentally adjusted from the days of impulse buying and not being able to.

In case no one has already said, the presence of the baby has natural consequences for your spending. You cut back on meals out (not just because of the transport hassle, but because they don't fit around junior's regimented feeding schedule). Impulse buying in shops is hard if you don't go out to shops any more.

greg66_tri_v2.0

Pep wrote:

... do people have one joint account with their spouse and one individual one?
Why?

My wife and I have only one joint account. Our money goes into it and out of it. That's it. There is only OUR finances, not MINE and HERS.

Yes, they do. Because they want to cling onto some semblance of independence.

We too have a single joint account.

Analogies with one person trying to fill a leaky bucket, and the other person making holes in the bucket are unhelpful, I am told.

prawny

I've found recently a lot of people do this. I find it a bit strange.

We have a similar set up but the other way around. All of my wages are our money and go into the joint account. We get our £40 each, and the rest either builds up to pay for joint things or meals out or presents for the kids.

But y'know, each to their own and all that. When me and Mrs Prawny first got together I couldn't pay my own way and she earnt a lot more than me. She always said I'd pay her back. It hasn't taken as long as I thought it might :?

tailwindhome

Pep wrote:

My wife and I have only one joint account. Our money goes into it and out of it. That's it. There is only OUR finances, not MINE and HERS.

That's the way we do it do.

But we don't know anyone else (of our generation) who do it this way

tailwindhome

Dan_K wrote:

TailWindHome wrote:

Dan_K wrote:

DDD I just want to take a second to tell you - YES this IS scary sh!t but you will get through this. I've been there, I know. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

The money is the easy bit

Yep at least with money you can plan on having none.

That applies to more than just money

kieranb

both of us work and all the money goes into the same joint account - we are not mad spenders and the big expenses are shared expenses like holidays.

When we were expecting our first child I was in uni (doing a post grad degree) in Lancaster and my wife worked for a university in Glasgow, so little income. First priority was for me to get a job after my degree. We both moved down to London, Mitcham to be exact, for work then. Moving to Mitcham helped alot as it was easy to save money not knowing anyone in the area (so no going out) and there being no nice shops/cafes around to tempt you to spend. Buying a cup of coffee and cake was out, as was buying music, books etc (local libray was nearby), we cut way down on drink, shopped at Sainsurby's for a balance between quality and cost. Slowly things got better. But currently most spare money is either saved or goes on overpayments on the mortgarge. Bike bits are a low priority and now on a replacement only scheme.

Gussio

You won't have time or energy to go shopping for the first 12 months, so expenditure naturally decreases.

As said above, you don't need to buy everything new for the baby.

el_presidente

Dan_K wrote:

A new set of wheels lasts a few years, memories such as a first smile, steps or cuddles last a lifetime.

spend enough on your wheels and they should come close to lasting you a lifetime (especially w/ ceramic rims or discs...)

BigJimmyB

Greg66 wrote:

Pep wrote:

... do people have one joint account with their spouse and one individual one?
Why?

My wife and I have only one joint account. Our money goes into it and out of it. That's it. There is only OUR finances, not MINE and HERS.

Yes, they do. Because they want to cling onto some semblance of independence.

We too have a single joint account.

Analogies with one person trying to fill a leaky bucket, and the other person making holes in the bucket are unhelpful, I am told.

I've been with Mrs BJB for 10 years, married for 5. Still have separate a/c's, no joint one.

Horses for courses.

el_presidente

that's no way to speak about your wife

GenevaCamper

> I hope not to be found offensive or nosy or rude but ...

No offence taken, what works for some wont work for others. If it really came down to the last penny then I dare say we would have just one account but we find it works better if each of us has a small amount of our 'own' money - that way Mrs doesn't get the hump if I buy a few bike bits and likewise I don't know how much she spends on make-up or clothes or whatever.

Regarding buying new stuff for the baby, we have managed to get virtually everything 2nd hand and have in some cases sold stuff on for more or less what we have paid for it.

veronese68

blu3cat wrote:

Veronese68 wrote:

Feeding a 13 year old boy that has been growing about an inch a month for most of this year certainly doesn't help finances. The amount that boy can eat is terrifying.

Would a restricted calorie diet stop his rapid growth as well, cutting food and clothing costs??

I have suggested this on many occasions. He doesn't look impressed when I do. He also seems to come back with some kind of smart@rse answer. He must have inherited that trait from his mother, couldn't possibly be me. He's also big enough that I have to be careful when I beat him.
Just in case anyone is taking me seriously, I couldn't restrict his food intake. There's scarcely an ounce of fat on him. We are however looking at getting a larger fridge when finances permit.

Initialised

Selling the car freed up over 60 per week on insurance alone.

Stiff_Orange

Initialised wrote:

Selling the car freed up over 60 per week on insurance alone.

What?? >£3000 per year insurance? Do you mean £60 per month?

TheStone

How much do babies actually cost? I would have thought the money saved by going out less would be way more than baby costs?

Aren't nappies under £10/week? and most of the other stuff you can get second hand or from a friends/family.... am I missing something?

I can see that being down to one salary would make a big dent and when they're older they might need more stuff (extra mortgage on room probably the biggest).

While I'm on the subject, when should kids be out of nappies. Bloke at work's kid is 4 1/2. That can't be right?

tailwindhome

TheStone wrote:

Bloke at work's kid is 4 1/2. That can't be right?

It's not.

2 to 3 would be about right.

All kids are different though. Some are ready sooner than others.

Our twins are just about ready, they'll be 3 in December. It's going to be a nightmare/circus


4 1/2 is ridiculous (unless the kid has some sort of disability)

bigmat

TheStone wrote:

How much do babies actually cost? I would have thought the money saved by going out less would be way more than baby costs?

Aren't nappies under £10/week? and most of the other stuff you can get second hand or from a friends/family.... am I missing something?

I can see that being down to one salary would make a big dent and when they're older they might need more stuff (extra mortgage on room probably the biggest).

While I'm on the subject, when should kids be out of nappies. Bloke at work's kid is 4 1/2. That can't be right?

Childcare is a major expense, I think ours is about £400 a month for 3 days a week. The rest of it - like you say, get stuff second hand, get gifts, etc. etc. Its not that bad. Nappies? 4 and a half seems a bit old, buty kids develop at different ages and different ways. We only have one in nappies if that puts it into context.

TheStone

BigMat wrote:

Childcare is a major expense,

Childcare does seem a lot, but by then you're back to 2 salaries (or most of the way there).

rick_chasey

Average cost of raising a child to the age of 21 is £200,000 (cumulatively), which is roughly, £9,000 odd a year.

rick_chasey

http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2010/ma ... aving-baby

NGale

At the moment budgeting for me is a tough issue. The car is only being used when necessary (walking, cycling or getting the bus as much as i can) the food shopping bill has been cut and less shopping is being done at Sainsburys and more being done at Lidl. As of the end of this month there will be only one wage in the household as I will recieve just one months pay and nothing redundancy wise.

Planned house move is also off for the foreseeable.

rhext

I saw a definition of 'Father' as 'Someone whose wallet contains pictures where his money used to be'. That's about right!

I consider it's my job to make sure there's enough money in the joint account to make sure that household expenses are covered. If there's some left at the end of the month, and I've got things like holidays, birthdays etc covered, I don't feel guilty spending a bit 'for me', nor do I resent it if my wife beats me to it and spends a bit 'for her'.

The very idea of personal money is a dim and distant memory though. And a lot depends on whether there's any left. If it's a choice between (for example) a family holiday or a new bike, I'd certainly feel guilty if I went for the bike....so I don't.

tailwindhome

Did we not do this same thread...Hmmm....about 9 months ago?

EKE_38BPM

rhext wrote:

I saw a definition of 'Father' as 'Someone whose wallet contains pictures where his money used to be'

I like that a lot.

My dad's wallet was always empty of cash, but has lots of pictures of the family and there was always food in the kitchen. He might not be the nicest guy in the world, but I think he's a brilliant dad.

ACDCwmb

Being unemployed at the minute and for the last 8 weeks, my wife brings home the bacon, all be it a very small piece of bacon. After all the bills have been paid and including my jobseekers allowance we have £43 a week to buy food for the family and petrol

walkingbootweather

I've been the main breadwinner and always brought home the bacon, and the wife is still not happy. To be fair she is a wheat intolerant vegetarian

chadders81

I think I might have a vasectomy after skimming through this thread.

EKE_38BPM

My dad advised me: "If you are going to stand in deep puddles, make sure you wear wellies".

If you are going to have kids, plan you finances beforehand. If you shag without contraception, you are subconciously planning on having kids.