Meetings: Where the hell do you put your eyes

DonDaddyD

You're in a meeting with a colleague/boss

They have the most smooth, fantastic legs. It looks like they cycle and are most certainly properly shaved like a roadie.

Crossed legs and you can see that the smoothness extends up beyond the knee.

The mind wanders, jesus wept and where the hell do you put your eyes!?

Have you ever seen a black man blush... (everysingle meeting, everytime!)

Clever Pun

DonDaddyD wrote:

You're in a meeting with a colleague/boss

They have the most smooth, fantastic legs. It looks like they cycle and are most certainly properly shaved. Cross the legs and you can see that the smoothness extends up beyond the knee.

Where the hell do you put your eyes!?

Have you ever seen a black man blush...

sounds like a top class roadie... I thought you liked girls though?

jonginge

MonkeyMonster

JonGinge wrote:

+1

DonDaddyD

In a skirt obviously which is how I can see the smoothness. Heels to make the calves and muscles stretch and contort in that oh so sexy way... Thank feck she doesn't wear pencil skirts.

I may take a couple days off with stress...

Where do I put my eyes!? I can't escape the pins!

asprilla

I think I've been identified as a letch, I've just noticed today that whenever the young girl employed to to the PMO role on this project talks to me she overs her chest with something (her arm, a note book, etc).

I'm disappointed in myself for getting caught and her for blocking the view.

Clever Pun

DonDaddyD wrote:

In a skirt obviously which is how I can see the smoothness. Heels to make the calves and muscles stretch and contort in that oh so sexy way...

I may take a couple days off with stress...

Where do I put my eyes!? I can't escape the pins!

Christ man is cross dressing all the rage in your east london office?

Well, I for one wont be wearing lycra to the christmas do.

Real answer: look at your notepad or their face

Pufftmw

This thread is useless without pictures

MonkeyMonster

Asprilla wrote:

I think I've been identified as a letch, I've just noticed today that whenever the young girl employed to to the PMO role on this project talks to me she overs her chest with something (her arm, a note book, etc).

I'm disappointed in myself for getting caught and her for blocking the view.

I'd suggest from now on with her, you look her in the eye every time from now on and also mention her hair if you do happen to notice something new. Will show you aint looking elsewhere. Do not mention she has a nice notebook.

lost_in_thought

MonkeyMonster wrote:

Asprilla wrote:

I think I've been identified as a letch, I've just noticed today that whenever the young girl employed to to the PMO role on this project talks to me she overs her chest with something (her arm, a note book, etc).

I'm disappointed in myself for getting caught and her for blocking the view.

I'd suggest from now on with her, you look her in the eye every time from now on and also mention her hair if you do happen to notice something new. Will show you aint looking elsewhere. Do not mention she has a nice notebook.

I appreciate it when people make the effort to look at my face. I'M UP HERE DAMN IT.

DonDaddyD

I have a naturally downward facing head....

I generally don't look up or straight on. Of course this means I'm often looking at boobs, legs or the ground. Also I don't like long lengthy eye contact... not sure why especially meetings when my mind is prone to wandering every 7 secs...

wizzlebanger

I work for fashion company and was having lunch yesterday opposite a girl who was wearing a nice t-shirt / vest thing.

Alas, the t-shirt had a very obvious couple of rips / holes exactly where her cleavage was and I sat there throughout the whole of my lunch wondering how I could mention checking her wardrobe for moths or that her washing machine might be snagging items.

In the end I played safe and said nothing.

asprilla

lost_in_thought wrote:

MonkeyMonster wrote:

Asprilla wrote:

I think I've been identified as a letch, I've just noticed today that whenever the young girl employed to to the PMO role on this project talks to me she overs her chest with something (her arm, a note book, etc).

I'm disappointed in myself for getting caught and her for blocking the view.

I'd suggest from now on with her, you look her in the eye every time from now on and also mention her hair if you do happen to notice something new. Will show you aint looking elsewhere. Do not mention she has a nice notebook.

I appreciate it when people make the effort to look at my face. I'M UP HERE DAMN IT.

But, but it's higher up and my neck is tired...

Honestly, I do try, it appears that whenever I'm at a stand-up and staring vacantly into space whilst trying to make it look as if I'm even remotely interested in what everyone else is up to she hoves into my eyeline. Mainly because she is standing in front of us all pushing post-it notes around a Kanban board.

I'm going to start looking over her head at all times, or just taking my glasses off so that I'm not focusing on anything at all.

Zachariah

I may be wrong, but I am given to understand women often shave their legs for purposes other than cycling.

dhope

lost_in_thought wrote:

MonkeyMonster wrote:

Asprilla wrote:

I think I've been identified as a letch, I've just noticed today that whenever the young girl employed to to the PMO role on this project talks to me she overs her chest with something (her arm, a note book, etc).

I'm disappointed in myself for getting caught and her for blocking the view.

I'd suggest from now on with her, you look her in the eye every time from now on and also mention her hair if you do happen to notice something new. Will show you aint looking elsewhere. Do not mention she has a nice notebook.

I appreciate it when people make the effort to look at my face. I'M UP HERE DAMN IT.

Can't this be explained by physics? Large objects have a greater attraction.
It must be true, notice how I've cited physics, as in 'science', to make my point. Can't argue with that.

rjsterry

Have you considered blinkers?

DonDaddyD

Zachariah wrote:

I may be wrong, but I am given to understand women often shave their legs for purposes other than cycling.

I suppose they do. What I don't understand is why, at work, they'd wear a skirt and pour said legs into a pair of sexy shoes. Then have a 1:1 meeting with me with legs on show so far up the thigh I actually can't find a place to put my eyes...

I can feel my heart.

asprilla

rjsterry wrote:

Have you considered blinkers?

I think that would make it more obvious.

It's a version of target fixation, like when fighter pilots straffing targets crash straight into them.. I sometimes have the same issue with potholes; I know they are there, I can see them, but I still ride straight over them.

In the case my brain kinda goes:

'Don't look'
'Don't look at what?'
'Her chest'
'Where?'
'There, right there....'

And that's where the problem starts.

Sewinman

From something about Mary:

Dom: You choke the chicken before any big date, don't you? Tell me you spank the monkey before any big date. Oh my God, he doesn't flog the dolphin before a big date. Are you crazy? That's like going out there with a loaded gun! Of course that's why you're nervous. Oh my dear friend, please sit, please. Look, um, after you've had s*x with a girl, and you're lying in bed with her, are you nervous? No, you're not, why?
Ted: Cause I'm tired...
Dom: Wrong! It's 'cause you ain't got the baby batter on the brain anymore! Jesus, that stuff will f*ck you're head up! Look, the most honest moment in a man's life are the few minutes after he's blown his load - now that is a medical fact. And the reason for it is that you're no longer trying to get laid, you're actually... you're thinking like a girl, and girls love that.

DonDaddyD

Sewinman wrote:

From something about Mary:

Do you 'strum' before important meetings/interviews and such?

Do you 'strum' at work?

I do neither. And I thought you were an environmentalist.... hmph....

In the case my brain kinda goes:

'Don't look'
'Don't look at what?'
'Her chest'
'Where?'
'There, right there....'

And that's where the problem starts.

This. And its a becoming a problem...

rjsterry

DonDaddyD wrote:

Zachariah wrote:

I may be wrong, but I am given to understand women often shave their legs for purposes other than cycling.

I suppose they do. What I don't understand is why, at work, they'd wear a skirt and pour said legs into a pair of sexy shoes. Then have a 1:1 meeting with me with legs on show so far up the thigh I actually can't find a place to put my eyes...

I can feel my heart.

Good grief man! Get a hold of yourself...well, not literally. That really won't go down well in a meeting.

daviesee

DonDaddyD wrote:

What I don't understand is why, at work, they'd wear a skirt and pour said legs into a pair of sexy shoes.

I thought they went to all that effort so you would look at them 8)

I could be wrong though :?

soundninjauk

You guys have far more interesting people to look at in meetings than I do.

greg66_tri_v2.0

Watch the IT Crowd. Jen's boss - Reynhold. Take him as your role model for these so-called "meetings"...

Pufftmw

Discuss with HR

You should be able to go into a meeting with a collegue/boss and NOT feel stressed or worried about what she might be wearing in case you get impure thoughts.

They will then have a word with her & she will wear trousers or long skirts.


Or MTFU & discuss it with her, as a grown up.






We still want pics though

jonginge

Greg66 wrote:

Watch the IT Crowd. Jen's boss - Reynhold. Take him as your role model for these so-called "meetings"...

DDD needs some of those electric sex pants...
http://www.quoteaddict.com/quotes?search=Douglas%20Reynholm

Sewinman

Just a suggestion!

This female target fixation thing would be awesome on the golf course - just have a few buxom beauties loitering around the green on a long par 5 - we would all be looking at an eagle.

Clever Pun

rjsterry wrote:

DonDaddyD wrote:

Zachariah wrote:

I may be wrong, but I am given to understand women often shave their legs for purposes other than cycling.

I suppose they do. What I don't understand is why, at work, they'd wear a skirt and pour said legs into a pair of sexy shoes. Then have a 1:1 meeting with me with legs on show so far up the thigh I actually can't find a place to put my eyes...

I can feel my heart.

Good grief man! Get a hold of yourself...well, not literally. That really won't go down well in a meeting.

I've been told about film that suggest otherwise

could be the best day at work ever... probably your last in that job though

rjsterry

"Shut up legs" has a slightly different meaning for DDD.

Zachariah

This is the only language I could find the clip in.

DonDaddyD

Greg66 wrote:

Watch the IT Crowd. Jen's boss - Reynhold. Take him as your role model for these so-called "meetings"...

Do you ever have meetings with that woman I saw you walking with along Chancery Lane... sweet Moses...

I thought they went to all that effort so you would look at them Cool

I been thinking that...offered to give me a lift to the train station the other day. Drove past her house and everything. I've never mentioned Ms DDD so much in a single conversation.