What do you people do for a living?

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Comments

  • bails87
    bails87 Posts: 12,998
    I keep you alive.
    MTB/CX

    "As I said last time, it won't happen again."
  • Kiblams
    Kiblams Posts: 2,423
    Mostly it seems that I hate everyone for a living :(

    Oh dear, you don't have to support the BNP and work for the Daily Mail y'know! :wink:
    bails87 wrote:
    I keep you alive.

    I'll keep you alive in a minute!
  • I draw things on a computer for a living
    Santa Cruz Chameleon
    Orange Alpine 160
  • I draw things on a computer for a living

    Don't you get told off for damaging IT kit? I received a formal warning for sticking a 'ynni niwcliar bim dioloch' badge on my tower case.
    Visit Clacton during the School holidays - it's like a never ending freak show.

    Who are you calling inbred?
  • Beardface
    Beardface Posts: 5,495
    It appears I get paid to browse and post on here, because my work systems are usually broken.

    When my computer does work, In a civvy capacity, I help soldiers.
  • Alex
    Alex Posts: 2,086
    I work for a large governmental organisation within which I fix problems.

    I am prevented by the Official Secrets Act from disclosing any details of the people I work for.
  • .blitz
    .blitz Posts: 6,197
    MTB legend hahahahahaha *ahem* Design Engineer & IT Manager.
  • cee
    cee Posts: 4,553
    I talk to businesses about how they think they work...then investigate and talk to the staff to find out how it really works....then type gibberish into computers so that sense comes out the other end, hopefully having something to do with how the business wants to work in the future.
    Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle, I believe in the future of the human race.

    H.G. Wells.
  • whyamihere
    whyamihere Posts: 7,719
    supersonic wrote:
    When I worked there a few years back, they asked me about pretty much everything... except bikes.
    On the other hand, mine was a quick couple of questions about job experience, handling customers etc. and then a long conversation about bikes...
  • 360
    360 Posts: 5,940
    cee wrote:
    I talk to businesses about how they think they work...then investigate and talk to the staff to find out how it really works....then type gibberish into computers so that sense comes out the other end, hopefully having something to do with how the business wants to work in the future.

    you're not one of those business link people are you?
  • Tartanyak
    Tartanyak Posts: 1,538
    Hmmm. I type stuff into computers and make magic happen. Technically, I suppose I'm a director of a software company too, but I always feel a bit silly saying that.
  • gezzs
    gezzs Posts: 16
    IT Project Manager <yawn>
  • DSC01136-1.jpg
    BMC Trailfox 02
  • no the ultimate answer to this one would be Pornstar mind :p
  • millerbear wrote:
    DSC01136-1.jpg

    You’re a safety conscious rambler??

    Me? I’m not entirely sure what I do.
    "I ride to eat"
  • Tartanyak
    Tartanyak Posts: 1,538
    Shite ghostbuster?
  • cee
    cee Posts: 4,553
    360 wrote:

    you're not one of those business link people are you?

    Given that I don't know what a 'business link' person is.....amagonna say....no!

    Current Job title is Analysis and Development Engineer (basically a sfotware engineer), but writing code is probably 25% of my job. The rest is process managmenet, data flow analysis, defining organisational objectives.....then writing a piece of software to deliver all of the requirements gathered from that lot.
    Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle, I believe in the future of the human race.

    H.G. Wells.
  • Tartanyak
    Tartanyak Posts: 1,538
    Before working on my own stuff, we had pet analysts to do that bit, sans programming. A bad one could cause no end of stress for everyone. Yet, they always just hired the cheapest unqualified nobody to do the role... Except for one. He was good. People don't seem to realise how hard it can be, especially if the punters haven't a clue what they want in the first place.
  • I get paid to pi$$ people off by finding their mistakes from their work and tell them they have to do it again to match my standard..... without being their boss. 8)
    "It is not impossible, its just improbable"

    Specialized Rockhopper Pro Disc 08
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,665
    im a plant mechanic
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,665
    im a plant mechanic
    That's just a hippy/nonce word for gardener.
  • Civil Engineer
    FCN 9 - 2008 Kona Cinder Cone
    FCN 9 - Custom Build On-One 456
    FCN 5 - 2010 Boardman Team Carbon
  • 360
    360 Posts: 5,940
    cee wrote:

    Given that I don't know what a 'business link' person is.....amagonna say....no!

    Current Job title is Analysis and Development Engineer (basically a sfotware engineer), but writing code is probably 25% of my job. The rest is process managmenet, data flow analysis, defining organisational objectives.....then writing a piece of software to deliver all of the requirements gathered from that lot.

    Your job descriptions don't really match.

    Business Link is a government funded advice and support service.

    What happens is this.

    Some chap comes round and speaks to managment about the business and what their aims are. He then speaks to all the staff. After this is done he goes away for 4months and rumminates a plan of action for the business followed by an excited e-mail.

    He then visits and does a powerpoint presentation in which he suggests that the company gets a twitter account.
  • I'm the guy you come and talk to when you want some new and shiny or you've broken your bike
  • Kiblams
    Kiblams Posts: 2,423
    cee wrote:
    I talk to businesses about how they think they work...then investigate and talk to the staff to find out how it really works....then type gibberish into computers so that sense comes out the other end, hopefully having something to do with how the business wants to work in the future.

    Sounds like the Systems Analysis module I took at Uni.
  • lawman
    lawman Posts: 6,868
    im a sales assistant/ trainee bike mech at a local bike shop at weekends (DISCOUNTS FTW) and a general run around/admin/file destroyer at a local solicters during the week (which is sh!t)
  • stubs
    stubs Posts: 5,001
    As far as the Tax man is concerned I work 20 hours a week in an office.
    Fig rolls: proof that god loves cyclists and that she wants us to do another lap
  • Foobies
    Foobies Posts: 134
    work in boots, its as gay as it sounds, so to make up for it i also kill cheap prossies and dump them in the sea behind work.
    2019 Bianchi Oltre XR4
    2016 Bianchi Ethanol
    2015 Bianchi via nirone 7

    2018 Boardman ADV 8.9
  • jacktheoc
    jacktheoc Posts: 1,556
    Im a Plater/Welder. Also a student as ive just started my HNC.
  • go to peoples houses early in the morning and leave newspapers there

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