A message to my wife

2

Comments

  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    Just got an email from amazon, my vax carpet shampooer mejig has been dispatched - guess what I'm doing at the weekend :?
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • will3
    will3 Posts: 2,173
    Greg T wrote:

    Drinking from the milk carton = entry level offence.

    hA you get that too?
    But they don't understand - it tastes so much better and saves them some washing up. :roll:
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    will3 wrote:
    Greg T wrote:

    Drinking from the milk carton = entry level offence.

    hA you get that too?
    But they don't understand - it tastes so much better and saves them some washing up. :roll:

    I don't get it do you swig some crusha first?
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • Greg T
    Greg T Posts: 3,266
    prawny wrote:
    I don't get it do you swig some crusha first?

    This would be interesting - foul - but interesting.

    You don't drink milk from the carton?

    You are going to tell me you've never pee'd in a sink next.
    Fixed gear for wet weather / hairy roadie for posing in the sun.

    What would Thora Hurd do?
  • will3
    will3 Posts: 2,173
    edited August 2009
    it's the only way to drink milk

    When she complains about it, I just finish off the bottle. that way there's nothing to complain about.
  • Rich158
    Rich158 Posts: 2,348
    Good god, have your balls all shrivelled up and fallen off :shock: :shock: :shock:

    MTFU and let your women know where they stand, they respect a bit of authority you know :wink::wink::wink:
    pain is temporary, the glory of beating your mates to the top of the hill lasts forever.....................

    Revised FCN - 2
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    Greg T wrote:
    prawny wrote:
    I don't get it do you swig some crusha first?

    This would be interesting - foul - but interesting.

    You don't drink milk from the carton?

    You are going to tell me you've never pee'd in a sink next.

    I was going to say no but I'm sure I have :?

    I don't drink milk from the carton tho, apple juice is way more technical. Do you people(!) not have plastic milk bottles?
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    Rich158 wrote:
    Good god, have your balls all shrivelled up and fallen off :shock: :shock: :shock:

    MTFU and let your women know where they stand, they respect a bit of authority you know :wink::wink::wink:

    No offence rich, but for now I'll carry on being a wuss, maybe when the kids are older tho :wink:
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • Rich158
    Rich158 Posts: 2,348
    I'll let you into a secret Prawny

    Never take advice on relationships from a single man :wink:
    pain is temporary, the glory of beating your mates to the top of the hill lasts forever.....................

    Revised FCN - 2
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    Rich158 wrote:
    I'll let you into a secret Prawny

    Never take advice on relationships from a single man :wink:

    I hear you home boy :wink:

    I remeber the thread to ask where you'd posted a p1ssed up rant :D
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • il_principe
    il_principe Posts: 9,155
    prawny wrote:
    Just got an email from amazon, my vax carpet shampooer mejig has been dispatched - guess what I'm doing at the weekend :?

    (Smug) heheheh. I'm going cycling Wales at the weekend, enjoy your shampooing. (smug)
  • Rich158 wrote:
    Good god, have your balls all shrivelled up and fallen off :shock: :shock: :shock:

    MTFU and let your women know where they stand, they respect a bit of authority you know :wink::wink::wink:

    well certinaly being a door matt i'd say isn't wise, personally i grew up with strong women so have no problems with strong, definite ladies. since my family, is full of them and i married one, and to be honest most if not all of my female friends are so.
  • Rich158
    Rich158 Posts: 2,348
    prawny wrote:
    Rich158 wrote:
    I'll let you into a secret Prawny

    Never take advice on relationships from a single man :wink:

    I hear you home boy :wink:

    I remeber the thread to ask where you'd posted a p1ssed up rant :D

    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

    Suddenly everything becomes clear :roll: :wink:
    pain is temporary, the glory of beating your mates to the top of the hill lasts forever.....................

    Revised FCN - 2
  • symo
    symo Posts: 1,743
    Everyone at work wonders why I like being divorced. I must point them to this thread.
    +++++++++++++++++++++
    we are the proud, the few, Descendents.

    Panama - finally putting a nail in the economic theory of the trickle down effect.
  • DevUK
    DevUK Posts: 299
    Oh god. Have I got all of THIS to look forwards too?

    [smug]I like being single [/smug]
    FCN Daily commute = 11
    FCN Fixie commute = 5
  • symo
    symo Posts: 1,743
    DevUK wrote:
    Oh god. Have I got all of THIS to look forwards too?

    [smug]I like being single [/smug]
    Mate you have no idea, first it's can you do x, then before you know it she's in front of the telly all night and you're just finishing mowing the lawn at 10pm.
    +++++++++++++++++++++
    we are the proud, the few, Descendents.

    Panama - finally putting a nail in the economic theory of the trickle down effect.
  • Sorry darling, terribly important work stuff has kept me at the office past 9pm (not beer and pool).

    I was joking about the beer and pool btw. Honestly.
  • navt
    navt Posts: 374
    What is wrong with you lot? You have a bike. Use it.
  • Cafewanda
    Cafewanda Posts: 2,788
    navt, they can't use the bike until they have met certain requirements. Thankfully Bikeradar women don't have this problem :lol::lol:
  • Retch
    Retch Posts: 78
    I've learnt that one must never, ever attempt to take the initiative. A conversation some months back:

    Her: Where have you been
    Me (standing in hall with 4 or 5 Asda bags): Uh.. shopping. You were asleep, I woke up, so thought I'd do the shopping.
    Her: Did you take the list?
    Me: Yes of course my little spider crab, and everything upon the list has been purchased. (Expecting praise at this stage)
    Her (looks into one of the bags): Why did you buy fabric conditioner?
    Me: 'Twas on the shopping list, oh ray of sunshine in my life.
    Her (now pissed off): But we've got loads, why didn't you look in the cupboard? I meant washing powder. You should have got washing powder.

    Exits stage right, me in dog house.

    If women didn't have boobies, I'd not bother.
    FCN 5ish. Unless hungover.
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    Retch wrote:
    I've learnt that one must never, ever attempt to take the initiative. A conversation some months back:

    Her: Where have you been
    Me (standing in hall with 4 or 5 Asda bags): Uh.. shopping. You were asleep, I woke up, so thought I'd do the shopping.
    Her: Did you take the list?
    Me: Yes of course my little spider crab, and everything upon the list has been purchased. (Expecting praise at this stage)
    Her (looks into one of the bags): Why did you buy fabric conditioner?
    Me: 'Twas on the shopping list, oh ray of sunshine in my life.
    Her (now pissed off): But we've got loads, why didn't you look in the cupboard? I meant washing powder. You should have got washing powder.

    Exits stage right, me in dog house.

    If women didn't have boobies, I'd not bother.

    PMSL :lol:

    I want that on a t-shirt!
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • Retch
    Retch Posts: 78
    prawny wrote:
    Retch wrote:
    I've learnt that one must never, ever attempt to take the initiative. A conversation some months back:

    Her: Where have you been
    Me (standing in hall with 4 or 5 Asda bags): Uh.. shopping. You were asleep, I woke up, so thought I'd do the shopping.
    Her: Did you take the list?
    Me: Yes of course my little spider crab, and everything upon the list has been purchased. (Expecting praise at this stage)
    Her (looks into one of the bags): Why did you buy fabric conditioner?
    Me: 'Twas on the shopping list, oh ray of sunshine in my life.
    Her (now pissed off): But we've got loads, why didn't you look in the cupboard? I meant washing powder. You should have got washing powder.

    Exits stage right, me in dog house.

    If women didn't have boobies, I'd not bother.

    PMSL :lol:

    I want that on a t-shirt!

    Pffft. Like the finance committee, clothes committee or "things that are actually funny" committee would sign that off for you :wink:
    FCN 5ish. Unless hungover.
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    True, I also want a new bike. But that aint happenin either.
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • girv73
    girv73 Posts: 842
    What do you mean, ANOTHER bike?
    Today is a good day to ride
  • symo
    symo Posts: 1,743
    Retch wrote:
    I've learnt that one must never, ever attempt to take the initiative. A conversation some months back:

    Her: Where have you been
    Me (standing in hall with 4 or 5 Asda bags): Uh.. shopping. You were asleep, I woke up, so thought I'd do the shopping.
    Her: Did you take the list?
    Me: Yes of course my little spider crab, and everything upon the list has been purchased. (Expecting praise at this stage)
    Her (looks into one of the bags): Why did you buy fabric conditioner?
    Me: 'Twas on the shopping list, oh ray of sunshine in my life.
    Her (now pissed off): But we've got loads, why didn't you look in the cupboard? I meant washing powder. You should have got washing powder.

    Exits stage right, me in dog house.

    If women didn't have boobies, I'd not bother.

    Ah you see, mind reading fail there.
    +++++++++++++++++++++
    we are the proud, the few, Descendents.

    Panama - finally putting a nail in the economic theory of the trickle down effect.
  • ride_whenever
    ride_whenever Posts: 13,279
    Just make sure to perfect your basil fawlty style antics, then you can just amuse yourself...
  • girv73
    girv73 Posts: 842
    symo wrote:
    Mate you have no idea, first it's can you do x, then before you know it she's in front of the telly all night and you're just finishing mowing the lawn at 10pm.

    *sobs quietly*
    Today is a good day to ride
  • DonDaddyD
    DonDaddyD Posts: 12,689
    edited August 2009
    The best one:

    GF - "I'm upset with you"
    DDD - "What, why, what have I done now"
    GF - "Funny that you say 'now', isn't it"
    DDD - "What is that supposed to mean"
    GF - "What is what supposed to mean"
    DDD - "huh, I'm confused, the er.. the funny I said now thing"
    GF - "You act like you're always in trouble, playing the victim, like I'm some kinda b*tch or something"
    DDD - "What the f*ckt! you're not a b*tch, I didn't say that.. oh hell"
    GF - "Don't! Swear at me!"
    DDD - "Huh, OK sorry, I was frustrated, its just that I don't understand what I did wro..."
    GF - "I don't f*cking care! don't f*cking swear at me!"
    DDD - "But you're swearing at me now..."
    GF - "That's not the point, you swore at me first, don't talk to me like that I've told you this already!"
    DDD - "OK, sorry, what did I do wrong..."
    GF - "Oh so that's it, you think it's OK, you take me for granted you do!"

    And so on.....
    Food Chain number = 4

    A true scalp is not only overtaking someone but leaving them stopped at a set of lights. As you, who have clearly beaten the lights, pummels nothing but the open air ahead. ~ 'DondaddyD'. Player of the Unspoken Game
  • Cafewanda
    Cafewanda Posts: 2,788
    DDD what's the problem? I don't see anything wrong there............. 8)
  • ride_whenever
    ride_whenever Posts: 13,279
    anyone else get the moaning about you not appreciating the housework she's done before you've even taken your shoes off. Even though you have noticed, but barely had a chance to say anything. Thereby depriving you of the chance to earn brownie points for noticing, i've taken to just sniffing and saying, hmmm smells like burning martyr in here...