Your rants here.

pastryboy

Kids on regents park canal - you're not black, you're asian and no I don't want to 'bop my head' to the tinny rap music on your mobile phone - piss off out of the way

redvee

Sat at a set of lights at the head of the queue with the ASL in front of us, in the works van, and some fecker comes up the left hand lane and stops in the ASL box. If any cyclist had been there they would have been on the deck.

Mr Sworld

Kurako wrote:

Lights still red! Mr Slow again. Finally lose him for good going into Tooting. Yay!

He can't be that slow, he caught up with you 6 times!

kurako

Mr Sworld wrote:

Kurako wrote:

Lights still red! Mr Slow again. Finally lose him for good going into Tooting. Yay!

He can't be that slow, he caught up with you 6 times!

Aaaarrgh!!! I hate red lights :x

I seem to have become addicted to this thread. Am I angrier or just very crytical? It's good to vent so here goes.

Friday seems to bring out the nutters.

A) Lights at Kennington Park. Red! No surprise. Bloke on a Brompton (what else?) runs the lights, pedalling furiously while ringing his bell at the cyclist who is turning right across his path (on a green).

B. The grey haired woman who was closely following Mr Brompton from part A.

C. Woman riding the wrong way on the right hand side of the bus lane on Commercial Road.

D. Coming down the little one way street that connect Commercial Road and Narrow St. Stuck behind a car which is negotiating the speed bumps VERY slowly. Fair enough thinks me and sit in primary behind the car. Could have passed what would be the point? So we get to the stop sign at the bottom of the road I want to go straight on so stay in the middle and the community bus behind who wants to go left tries to pass by going round the outside. All this within spitting distance of the stop sign so I stop and say 'Would it hurt to wait?' and he makes a move over gesture and I say 'What does it matter since I'm stuck behind the car in front?'. Call him a stupid d*ck for good measure :P

I'm off for a lie down now!

unscarred

Kurako wrote:

So we get to the stop sign at the bottom of the road I want to go straight on so stay in the middle and the community bus behind who wants to go left tries to pass by going round the outside. All this within spitting distance of the stop sign so I stop and say 'Would it hurt to wait?' and he makes a move over gesture and I say 'What does it matter since I'm stuck behind the car in front?'. Call him a stupid d*ck for good measure :P

I think I've met him, he'll be the d1ck who looked me in the eye and then pulled out right in front of me onto Narrow Street so I had to jam the breaks on hard. His expressionless eyes made me suspect a sub-90 IQ rather than maliciousness. :roll:

kurako

unscarred wrote:

Kurako wrote:

So we get to the stop sign at the bottom of the road I want to go straight on so stay in the middle and the community bus behind who wants to go left tries to pass by going round the outside. All this within spitting distance of the stop sign so I stop and say 'Would it hurt to wait?' and he makes a move over gesture and I say 'What does it matter since I'm stuck behind the car in front?'. Call him a stupid d*ck for good measure :P

I think I've met him, he'll be the d1ck who looked me in the eye and then pulled out right in front of me onto Narrow Street so I had to jam the breaks on hard. His expressionless eyes made me suspect a sub-90 IQ rather than maliciousness. :roll:

All happened at pretty slow speed so no real danger. That's why I called him a 'stupid d*ck' rather than an 'effing c'.

SlowingDown

No one particular occasion or specific culprit (although I'm posting thanks to the latest example) but a pattern I've noticed:

Two riders, usually one male one female, probably 'couples'. Bloke rides in front and appears to be 'in charge' of decision making for both of them (i.e. when to pull out of side roads etc). He pulls out, she pulls out without looking. Not the safest approach but if you are gonna employ it at least make sure there is ample time for you both.

Twice in the last couple of weeks the same couple have pulled this stunt coming onto Denmark Hill from Champion Hill. Bloke glances at the junction, doesn't stop but pulls out onto Denmark Hill and his companion follows without looking at all. The last time they did it I'd have been a bit hacked off at how close he'd come to cutting me up if he'd been on his own, let alone leading the lass out and making me swerve out in front of the car just behind me to avoid hitting her.

With all the other cr@p to look out for on the roads I with cyclists would do each other a favour.

El Diego

"Eeee arrre mate can i av a go of yer bike etc etc" - Random chav

Annoying

El Diego

Pedestrians walking in to the road without looking is annoying but even worse is when they see you coming and walk out anyway, then to top it all off look at you like YOU were in the wrong.

People assuming that you cycle because you are poor and have no other choice cheeses me off.

Wallace1492

Plodding along on the road past a ned in a shell suit coasting along the pavement on a full susser mountain bike, then as you pass him, he hits the pedals, flicks away his fag and overtakes, still on the pavement. Gives you that look of "I am better than you". This is a no win situation, as if you rise to the bait, he stops, shouting "get it up ya!", if you just keep the constant pace, he then turns off, or stops at a shop, knowing that you will burn him anyway after about 200 yards.

Find it best just to ignore keep looking forward, pretend you have seen nothing.

Still, annoys me....... but then again I guess I did this when I was a kid.

knappers

I was turning right at the lights at Elland road next to the football ground and this stupid bitch was turning left going through a filter light with a a give way, it's a separate little offshoot that has to give way for people comin from the left even the ones that are turning right at the lights (a bit strange I know but it's all there in the road signs etc), She went straight through looking at me and carried on looking at me as though I didn't exist, after a near collision and much shouting as to what a dumb f*ck she was there was no reaction not even a movement that indicated that she was even aware that life on earth existed at that moment in time apart from herself.

facemunk

Kurako? did you stop and comment to a guy (bike) next to you when the girl jumped in front of you at T'Bec? If so, I was 2 bikes behind you and felt your pain through all the reds and then at that! So not your day!

If ti wasn't you - then it happened to someone else as well (wouldn't be surprised, it's a crappy red-light rat run)

:shock:

Eau Rouge

knappers wrote:

She went straight through looking at me and carried on looking at me as though I didn't exist, after a near collision and much shouting as to what a dumb f*ck she was there was no reaction not even a movement that indicated that she was even aware that life on earth existed at that moment in time apart from herself.

Ahh, the "If I carry on as if the person doesn't even exist, then I can pretend to myself that I didn't actually just do something amazingly stupid" look, otherwise known as 'guilt'
It's better than the surprised "what are you talking about, I'm an a CAR" look you can get instead.

Feltup

SlowingDown wrote:

No one particular occasion or specific culprit (although I'm posting thanks to the latest example) but a pattern I've noticed:

Two riders, usually one male one female, probably 'couples'. Bloke rides in front and appears to be 'in charge' of decision making for both of them (i.e. when to pull out of side roads etc). He pulls out, she pulls out without looking. Not the safest approach but if you are gonna employ it at least make sure there is ample time for you both.

.

I keep seeing this too. I have no idea why these girls aren't being run over, blind luck I guess.

kurako

facemunk wrote:

Kurako? did you stop and comment to a guy (bike) next to you when the girl jumped in front of you at T'Bec? If so, I was 2 bikes behind you and felt your pain through all the reds and then at that! So not your day!

If ti wasn't you - then it happened to someone else as well (wouldn't be surprised, it's a crappy red-light rat run)

:shock:

Can't remember really. That section between Balham and Tooting Bec can be soul destroying though. Especially when slow folk rub it in by overtaking at the lights. I'm getting agitated just thinking about it.

Must try to be 8)

gpsBRM

Normally I'd rant at car/lorry/bus drivers etc on my morning commute on the bike, but this morning I had to get the train, so got a lift to the station in a car (itwas chucking it down with rain). Hence the rant against a "cyclist", its ones like this that give the rest of us a bad name.

Near Orpington station there is a junction onto a main road that is slightly uphill and always busy. Whilst at the front of the queue waiting to pull onto the main road a lady on a "Turkish Green" coloured Brompton thought it perfectly acceptable to go up the outside of all the waiting traffic that we were in (not a problem) then dive straight in front of the car I was in just as it was pulling out of the junction to turn left, she didn't even take a 2nd glance. It was lucky she wasn't taken out.

The turn into the station is then a right turn off of the main road, which was obviously to daunting for her as she rode up onto the pavement, got off and waited for the crossing to turn green.

Kazz_uk

El Diego wrote:

Pedestrians walking in to the road without looking is annoying but even worse is when they see you coming and walk out anyway, then to top it all off look at you like YOU were in the wrong.

Ive only been cycling for about 2 months now, but already ive lost count of the times this has happened. Its good to see people looking before leaping out, but when they do see you and think "ah, its ok, its only a bike" then do it... If it was a car they'd reconsider, but i bet getting hit by a bike at 20mph smarts a bit too

mattward1979

Picked up my bike from the Rathbone place Evans, cycled round the West end backstreets for 20 mins or so getting used to a road bike (never been on one before EEK!)....

Start to head home, and approaching westminster bridge, some RETARD walks out on me at full pelt pushing a Buggy. JUST about manage to swerve around him without killing him or his baby.

Buggies and Babies should be banned from all streets and roads until parents can learn that pushing them out into the road does not automatically create a phantom Zebra crossing...

MonkeyMonster

actually, now I think about it - the pedestrians who get your speed in the distance TOTALLY wrong so they are in the middle of the road and you have to slow down just in case you hit em. Bad junction is ludgate hill when coming down faringdon hill.

UndercoverElephant

I had a great one last night going through Musselburgh. Standing traffic to my left, I filter to the right, there are a couple of left hand turns the standing cars sometimes take in order to get through. And I see a young lass talking on her mobile crossing from the right. She doesn't bother looking, so I slam on the brakes to not hit her.

I swear she said the following as I screeched to a halt, please read it in the thickest voice your brain can manage, "Oooh, hang on, I'm getting run over by a cyclist"

mattward1979

Pulled up to a stop at the roundabout on London road leading down into Dartford, let the cars from the right pass, got onto my pedals and pushed for some speed in an effort to clear the roundabout safely and quickly.

Some random chav coming from the Left has to brake for a microsecond to allow me past, so decides that its appropriate to flick a lit cigarette at me (missed.) and scream abuse...

Unfortunately couldnt catch his little hairdressers car.. would have loved a conversation...

kurako

MonkeyMonster wrote:

actually, now I think about it - the pedestrians who get your speed in the distance TOTALLY wrong so they are in the middle of the road and you have to slow down just in case you hit em. Bad junction is ludgate hill when coming down faringdon hill.

Even worse...

Ped crossing on a collision course. Ease off the pace, check its clear behind, move out to pass behind lemming ped. Then they see you.... AND STOP!

My instinct would be to get out of the way pretty quick not do the rabbit in the headlights trick :x

mattward1979

This is quite the mental catharsis

ok last one for today,

Approaching the HUGE roundabout the leads left to the Dartford tunnel or straight to Dartford town center, Indicated right early enough to manouver but before I had the chance a French Lorry driver pulled up on my right, and without indicating proceeded across the roundabout turning left, meaning I was in real danger of ending up under his wheels.

luckily my brakes were on fine form, and the driver behind noticed this absolute abberation of driving technique, so I was able to let him pass and make it off the roundabout uninjured but VERY shaken up!!

Wallace1492

Pull up to a roundabout to go straight across, take primary in left hand lane (left or ahead) car pulls up in right hand lane (ahead or right) we both take off at same time, but he turns LEFT, means i brake hard to avoid being side swiped. Do some people have no intelligence!!

attica

Wallace1492 wrote:

Do some people have no intelligence!!

sadly it's just a complete lack of patience.

I was overtaken by a WVM not too close this morning but he was leaning on the horn as he went past. I can only conclude that I had "held him up" a bit as it was a narrowish yet busy road.
I AM the frickin' traffic godammit.

The Running Man

I think I've found my spiritual home

So I'm heading up the A4 out of Bath through Box and I approach a set of traffic lights with a straight on lane and right hand lane to turn right up to 5 Ways. Before you hit the lights there's an island in the middle of the road with a bollard on it. These always hack off drivers who try and squeeze through on your outside only too find it's too tight and they have to brake sharpish.

So there's a couple in a car behind me who've just done exactly that. It's useful for me because I can then "safely" signal and move out to the right to take the turn up to 5 Ways.

Woman in car decides to accelerate on the inside lane then pull out in front of me into the right hand lane and causes me to brake. I shake my head. She hits the horn BUT .......

The lights turn red. I pull up alongside and smile and tap on her window. Man in car glowers. I politely suggest she didn't need to blast her horn at me. She says I swerved out in front of her to the right and she only just missed me.

I suggest she either didn't see me because I did clearly signal so she either wasn't paying attention to the road or she was driving too close to me - so which is it as she can't have it both ways.

Boyfriend weighs in with a load of really aggressive verbal - shouldn't be on the road, I'm an effing tw*t, etf*ckingcetera.

At this point I politely invited him to leave the vehicle and step out onto the side of the road where we could continue to have an informed discussion or if he'd prefer I could spread him all over the f*cking pavement and make him wish he'd spent the afternoon driving 6 inch nails through his penis.

That seemed to do the trick nicely and they shut up just in time for the lights to go green ....

:roll: :roll: :roll:

attica

YOMANK!

Did you actually use the phrase about the 6 inch nails? Superb! I'm never that eloquent in the face of a potential pasting

The Running Man

Yep - promise!! His little face was a picture.

mattward1979

The Running Man wrote:

Yep - promise!! His little face was a picture.

You almost make me wish I was a shorter dude!!

no offense intended but the second I square up to someone they shrink like a penis in a bowl of cold water!!!

If it came to the whole physical side id get my huge arse spread across the pavement, but its nice to avoid these exchanges purely based on the fact that im a 6'3" metaller that looks kinda scary if your not sure of my housetraining...

Like a Pitbull or a rott lol!

always_tyred

Oh, nothing special.

Filter to the front of a queue, guy comes past in his Audi within maybe 18 inches, across some quite clearly shockingly bad potholes (of the sort cars drive around) so I rap knuckes on his wing and, at the inevitable redlights 50 yards further along, I ask him to wind down his window.

Middle aged guy, expensive jacket, blah, so I said that if he was in touching distance, he was much much too close. He replied that he'd been there first.

So, supposedly intelligent educated middle aged man rationalises that driving into someone and potentially seriously injuring them is a just punishment for feeling that someone has pushed in.

I'd hate to see the carnage if he tried to check into a flight in Cairo.

2 minutes later, he's taken a different route to me and is sat at lights. I confess, dear Lord to resting hand on his roof and leaning to the passenger window and shouting "AM I STILL HOLDING YOU UP?"

He looked straight ahead.

Forgive me for loosing my rag a bit for having my life reduced to a (perceived) breach of queueing etiquette.