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Post of the Tour, 2017

above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
edited July 2017 in Pro race
It is the day before Le Grand Départ in that most French of French cities, Düsseldorf. We're all playing Kratwerk until our neighbours file a noise complaint, chilling our best rhenish and trying to find out if Düsseldorf has a famous cheese.

Excitement is building about whether Christopher Stem Watcher Froome can make it to 4, or whether he will be bested by an Easter Island statue, a boy who likes Toblerone or mon dieu peut-être a Peanut or someone called Romain who seems not to have any nicknames which surely says something about the intense passion he stirs.

But of course what everyone is eagerly awaiting — everyone being me who is studiously trying to avoid writing the conclusion to an R&R article that I'm not convinced makes any sense anymore, thank you reviewer 2 you absolute kn0bmoomin — is the Post of the Tour, 2017 thread.

Well wait no more pop pickers because here it is!

If I knew how to linky the olde threads from years gone by I would do so. But be warned I fear we have less chance for comedy this year now that Astana no longer look like smurfs. However, Fabio Aru is riding so there is still ample opportunity for some of this...

gonzo-face-smashed.jpg

Klaxons at the ready and let the madness commence!
Correlation is not causation.
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Posts

  • josamejosame Posts: 1,057
    Where's the 'like' button when you need one
    'Do not compare your bike to others, for always there will be greater and lesser bikes'
  • Lanterne_RogueLanterne_Rogue Posts: 3,330
    Aru TT'ing was definitely the post of last year. Got caught out checking this place at work because of laughing when I saw it again earlier...
  • tim000tim000 Posts: 718
    "easter island statue" brilliant . :lol::lol::lol:
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    Thanks to the handy Inrng I can tell you that Fabio Aru is due to throw some face shapes at 18h27 CET.

    Other's to look out for...

    18h06 CET Toblerone Boy
    18h30 CET Easter Island Statue
    18h32 CET The Stem Watcher

    I have no times for the Peanut or the One Without a Nickname.

    Sorry.
    Correlation is not causation.
  • Lanterne_RogueLanterne_Rogue Posts: 3,330
    tim000 wrote:
    "easter island statue" brilliant . :lol::lol::lol:

    Good enough to nick... https://twitter.com/NoWorkRail/status/881081479303921664
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    tim000 wrote:
    "easter island statue" brilliant . :lol::lol::lol:

    Good enough to nick... https://twitter.com/NoWorkRail/status/881081479303921664

    I am humbly at your service.
    Correlation is not causation.
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    From the Lanterne Rouge thread, underlayunderlay's finish was superb...
    RichN95 wrote:
    Bo Duke wrote:
    You always find folks showing off in the first stage, they can't keep it up after a couple of days though.

    Sam Bennett is a real threat, he's tasted glory, he knows where these races are won and lost and as Richie Porte said, it's not on the first day. Maybe Porte's going to have a go? Until then my money's on Bennett.
    Sam Bennett isn't in the race

    I could have sworn he was on the start list when I checked earlier this week, hence including him in the preview I did. Am I going mad?

    Well there's George "Gordon" Bennet. He's Sam's dad. From New Zealand.

    That must be where my confusion was, although I'm kicking myself. I can't cope with all these Bennetts. It's a fact universally acknowledged that if I wanted a load of Bennetts embarrassing themselves I'd read Pride and Prejudice.
    Correlation is not causation.
  • Lanterne_RogueLanterne_Rogue Posts: 3,330
    Reto Hollenstein was fingered

    Marginal gains.

    It's been a while since I've literally laughed out loud at something.
  • This one deserves elevating from the stage 3 thread :lol:
    RichN95 wrote:
    RichN95 wrote:
    EnacheV wrote:
    Froome and Thomas started 30 meters behind Porte and COntador, finished 10m ahead of them. Probably Froome will take yellow on stage 5 and keep it till the end (baring non watts related incidents).

    Sky problem seems to be the missing powerhouse Stannard + Rowe and Knees injured + and now Kiry crashed also. they lack power on flat, today their positioning was catastrophic.
    It was Kwiatkowski's job and he did it just fine. Knees and Rowe did a fair bit on the front today

    If they had finished 30metres further forward, they'd have got the win and second place bonus seconds. Marginal gains.
    It they stuck a few Malteasers up their sleeves they would have won by thirty seconds
  • dav1d1dav1d1 Posts: 653
    From stage 4
    RichN95 wrote:
    Does this mean the end for the Cooking Revolution?
  • No_Ta_DoctorNo_Ta_Doctor Posts: 11,187
    Also from Stage 4 (the aftermath)
    dish_dash wrote:
    AtC on the money about punishment.

    We've seen Sagan bullying his way around the peloton for a while... was bound to come a cropper at some point. He needed a bit of disciplining. The sport is bigger than the man. Journos sobbing about it have gone well down in my opinion - notably some of the american journos.



    Setting up a gofundme just to fund Kleenex for them to cry into
    No need. The way some of them speak about him, I suspect the Kleenex was already close to hand.
    “Road racing was over and the UCI had banned my riding positions on the track, so it was like ‘Jings, crivvens, help ma Boab, what do I do now? I know, I’ll go away and be depressed for 10 years’.”

    @DrHeadgear

    The Vikings are coming!
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    Damn that carpetbottom they beat me to the joke. Still, great minds...
    Correlation is not causation.
  • type:epyttype:epyt Posts: 766
    Not TdF related but posted during the race:

    viewtopic.php?f=40042&t=13082220

    Read the thread title and then the first seven words of the opening post ... must be some sort of record for sheer idiocy ...
    Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it.
  • k1875k1875 Posts: 485
    KingstonGraham
    Re: TDF 2017: Stage 5-Vittel - La planche des belles filles 160.5kms *Spoilers*
    PostWed Jul 5, 2017 4:45 pm

    Blazing Saddles wrote:
    Oh and If Richie is satisfied with that performance, his wife must be very frustrated.


    He came fourth, so maybe not
  • Mad_MalxMad_Malx Posts: 4,368
    type:epyt wrote:
    Not TdF related

    Am I allowed to write "Idiot non-Tour post No. 1. ..." ?
  • blazing_saddlesblazing_saddles Posts: 18,199
    k1875 wrote:
    KingstonGraham
    Re: TDF 2017: Stage 5-Vittel - La planche des belles filles 160.5kms *Spoilers*
    PostWed Jul 5, 2017 4:45 pm

    Blazing Saddles wrote:
    Oh and If Richie is satisfied with that performance, his wife must be very frustrated.


    He came fourth, so maybe not

    Nah, on seconds thoughts, I'll leave the obvious joke out.
    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • type:epyttype:epyt Posts: 766
    Mad_Malx wrote:
    type:epyt wrote:
    Not TdF related

    Am I allowed to write "Idiot non-Tour post No. 1. ..." ?

    Depends what colour of jersey you're wearing ...
    Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it.
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    Please leave the pointless willy waving to BMC.
    Correlation is not causation.
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    Please leave the pointless willy waving to BMC.
    Typical response of someone without a willy.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    RichN95 wrote:
    Please leave the pointless willy waving to BMC.
    Typical response of someone without a willy.

    0btiAIt.gif
    Correlation is not causation.
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    This was a LOL.
    mfin wrote:
    Kit Kat.

    Kidl surely?
    Correlation is not causation.
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    With a little help from the useless BBC...
    Graeme_S wrote:
    RichN95 wrote:
    Sagan's appeal may have been rejected, but there's a big change in fortunes for Cavendish

    DEEDZZmXkAEOHT7.jpg
    I think it's brilliant that the BBC have let UK Cycling Expert guest tweet!
    Correlation is not causation.
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    If you go to the non-commentary feed on Eurosport you get much more of a sense of how fast they're going because you can hear the engines.

    Don't go starting that rumour again...
    Correlation is not causation.
  • ProssPross Posts: 29,557
    Postby No tA Doctor » Sat Jul 8, 2017 3:07 pm

    [email protected] wrote:

    Is Demare still in the race?

    The TDF have stopped showing his time.


    Pross wrote: Their stop watch probably doesn't have hours on it.


    [email protected] wrote: I wondered if it was too embarrassing for France ?


    No tA Doctor wrote: He's aiming to win this stage on Bastille day
    .
  • above_the_cowsabove_the_cows Posts: 11,318
    Beaten by some git on a singlespeed. I think every single one of us who commutes by bike knows the feeling...
    Correlation is not causation.
  • ddraverddraver Posts: 23,195
    2 more from tpday IMO
    RichN95 wrote:
    Salsiccia1 wrote:
    TheBigBean wrote:
    FDJ didn't think that through losing 4 riders.

    it's mental, isn't. They should have pulled Demare straight away and told the others to get on with it.
    Yeah, but you know what Madiot is like. The Tricolore must be honoured. He probably stood on the finish line singing La Marseillaise as they rode the last 100m.


    Dan Martin thinks he's basically okay:
    Crazy day on @LeTour Remarkably it seems I bounced well and I'm relatively ok. Sure to be sore tomorrow. Best wishes @richie_porte

    The even better news is that if he can manage to catch the highlights on ITV4, there's about sixty firms willing to help him if he's had an accident that wasn't his fault.
    We're in danger of confusing passion with incompetence
    - @ddraver
  • m.r.m.m.r.m. Posts: 2,419
    Salsiccia1 wrote:
    Zubeldia is the new Zubeldia. It's just that no-one's noticed.
    PTP Champion 2019
  • graeme_s-2graeme_s-2 Posts: 3,382
    M.R.M. wrote:
    Salsiccia1 wrote:
    Zubeldia is the new Zubeldia. It's just that no-one's noticed.
    Outstanding :mrgreen:
  • tailwindhometailwindhome Posts: 16,666

    CF flapping.....
    les-sins-bother_dezeen_SQ01.gif
    Believe that a farther shore
    Is reachable from here.
    Believe in miracles
    And cures and healing wells
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