tuesday the cheese! save the cheese!

sungod

'ning

gym, wfh, cafes etc.

pineapple supplies replenished, but failure to make a list means yesterday a return to waitrose will be required

tlw1

Shoot sleep but I thought it would give me time to get ahead with work, only to have ferkin issues connecting - so feck it, packed my clothes ready for this weeks holiday

Matthewfalle

Morning folks

Today I am mostly back on form so am not going to work and will be chainsawibg logs instead.

So this is probably one of my last posts before I cut all my limbs off

seanoconn

Matthewfalle wrote:

Morning folks

Today I am mostly back on form so am not going to work and will be chainsawibg logs instead.

So this is probably one of my last posts before I cut all my limbs off

Will there be a post mid limb cutting?

sungod

i tried to picture the scene, then suddenly i had a flashback to my childhood, the blood, the torn limbs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1-NpyaOWV0

sloppyschleckonds

Thats torn it

Matthewfalle

seanoconn wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

Morning folks

Today I am mostly back on form so am not going to work and will be chainsawibg logs instead.

So this is probably one of my last posts before I cut all my limbs off

Will there be a post mid limb cutting?

The soggy splashing of wet stumps against keyboard ........ Thing is, the bloke I got the chainsaw off is really nice, so I would be gutted to hand (well, foot/mouth - whatever it is I have left) back to him covered in claret.

Matthewfalle

oxoman wrote:

First of 3 on shift. Picking up the crap from previous shifts great.

What you do Oxo?

sungod

Matthewfalle wrote:

The soggy splashing of wet stumps against keyboard ........ Thing is, the bloke I got the chainsaw off is really nice, so I would be gutted to hand (well, foot/mouth - whatever it is I have left) back to him covered in claret.

surely you'd just jump up and down on it until it's a tangled wreck, then kick it over the fence into next door's garden

no upper limbs required for that, if you're agile it'd be doable with only one leg

Matthewfalle

sungod wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

The soggy splashing of wet stumps against keyboard ........ Thing is, the bloke I got the chainsaw off is really nice, so I would be gutted to hand (well, foot/mouth - whatever it is I have left) back to him covered in claret.

surely you'd just jump up and down on it until it's a tangled wreck, then kick it over the fence into next door's garden

no upper limbs required for that, if you're agile it'd be doable with only one leg

I've duck taped a hammer to my head so I can smash what remains of it before picking it up with the spoon I've sellotaped to my chin and flinging it over, Highland Games style.

I do like your plan though.

As it is, the frickin' chainsaw has just fallen apart so back to chainsaw man I go. Good job I'm bigger than him and have a hammer duck taped to my head and a spoon sellotaped to my chin.

Matthewfalle

As an aside, I'm just going to put a Pot Noodle on before I go, so it'll be all ready for when I get back. Bombay Bad Boy jobbie.

pinno

Matthewfalle wrote:

So this is probably one of my last posts before I cut all my limbs off

That's a relief.

Me going pedalling me - just as soon as I have had 6 coffee, 4 bowls of porage, a whole bar of dark chocolate, 2kg's of Cashew nuts and a nap.

What is it that Oxoman does? That is today's big question. I'd hazard a guess that he works in the City morgue.

Laters.

homers_double

Morning ladies! Started today off with a short run, continuing it with some paper chasing and desk driving.

Lunch will be boring, dinner slightly less so but nothing to set the world on fire. Such is the life of someone in search of a summer body but TBH I'm more likely to find the Holy Grail.

Matthewfalle

Chainsaw dead. Clearing up bits and sawdust I've already done, Pot noodles, coffee, weights, Hound walking. That's me done.

sungod

had a break from wfh and serviced front hub on commute bike as it'd sounded a bit dry, fortunately there was still a bit of grease left so no rusty balls this time, now restored to grease-packed happiness

maybe time for another cafe break

step83

Morning, WFH today owing to a lack of voice dam work people coming in infecting others.

debate today is lunch, then weather or not to splurge on some new glasses.

pinno

Where tf is VN? Maybe it's panic stations down in partsville as they have run out of biscuits.
Stevo's awol - perhaps he's been murdered by some black manyoo fans.

Garry H

Matthewfalle wrote:

sungod wrote:

Matthewfalle wrote:

The soggy splashing of wet stumps against keyboard ........ Thing is, the bloke I got the chainsaw off is really nice, so I would be gutted to hand (well, foot/mouth - whatever it is I have left) back to him covered in claret.

surely you'd just jump up and down on it until it's a tangled wreck, then kick it over the fence into next door's garden

no upper limbs required for that, if you're agile it'd be doable with only one leg

I've duck taped a hammer to my head so I can smash what remains of it before picking it up with the spoon I've sellotaped to my chin and flinging it over, Highland Games style.

I do like your plan though.

As it is, the frickin' chainsaw has just fallen apart so back to chainsaw man I go. Good job I'm bigger than him and have a hammer duck taped to my head and a spoon sellotaped to my chin.

You need to duck tape a Stanley knife to the hammer as well, Glasgow style!

pinno

...hang on. Article 69 has been declared as imminent and the pound has sunk. That's anti-depressants for Stevo.

Stevo_666

Pinno wrote:

...hang on. Article 69 has been declared as imminent and the pound has sunk. That's anti-depressants for Stevo.

Au contraire, my US shares are doing quite well . Bally will be a happy boy as well.

Been busy, tax doesn't just save itself you know. Only one meeting this afternoon then it's out for wine, women and song. Or something like that.

In other good news my DPF is covered under warranty so just saved myself a few quid

homers_double

sungod wrote:

had a break from wfh and serviced front hub on commute bike as it'd sounded a bit dry,

You never go to work so what's the point?

pinno

homers double wrote:

sungod wrote:

had a break from wfh and serviced front hub on commute bike as it'd sounded a bit dry,

You never go to work so what's the point?

Harsh but true.

sungod

secure access and the interweb means i can work from anywhere there's a decent connection

actually used to prefer going in, but these days usually only 2-3 times a week for variety and/or meet people, some days the place is almost empty which gets boring

the increasing number of communters and weaving boris bikers getting in my way is another disincentive

Matthewfalle

Just had to go to work.

RAF Regiment: they really are shite.

sungod

someone walk into a prop?

Matthewfalle

sungod wrote:

someone walk into a prop?

If only they had.

I know there are good and bad in every organisation, but they really are a shower.

sungod

a long long time i ago i was persuaded to ignore my first impressions and ok hiring someone on the basis of skillset and recommendation, "because we really need him"

he had his safety training, was issued with his ir energy detection card

still decides to go into the lab and eyeball a live laser port, presumably to find out if he can see ir

trip to hospital ensues, fortunately no permanent damage

subsequently demonstrated his deep understanding of security by browsing the web for cockrings over our segregated internet connection, everything is logged and i audit the logs, hilarious discussion between me and his team leader as i requested administration of some discipline

some people don't deserve to live

pinno

Matthewfalle wrote:

sungod wrote:

someone walk into a prop?

If only they had.

I know there are good and bad in every organisation, but they really are a shower.

You have been less than complementary about the wet and the dry boys before, so where does that put you on the scale?

Matthewfalle

I am no Chuck Norris but dear God please let me be better than them.

step83

Example of a moron at work, request I declined from a business account manager, he basically "needed" a popular online gambling site enabled for "business purposes" seemed very angry I said no.

Matthewfalle

Is he RAF Regiment?