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Cheating in Sport - The Transparency Thread

tailwindhometailwindhome Posts: 16,667
edited March 2017 in Pro race
I walked part of the way and still got my 10m swimming badge

Suck it up buttercup
Believe that a farther shore
Is reachable from here.
Believe in miracles
And cures and healing wells
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Posts

  • kingstongrahamkingstongraham Posts: 17,773
    Alright, show off. Call you Jesus from now on shall we?
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    Sometimes on PTP, I'm too lazy to think about it so I just pick the person the last person picked.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • bobmcstuffbobmcstuff Posts: 10,219
    RichN95 wrote:
    Sometimes on PTP, I'm too lazy to think about it so I just pick the person the last person picked.

    +1
  • bobmcstuffbobmcstuff Posts: 10,219
    Sometimes I'm too lazy to think of my own posts so I just quote the person above and put "+1"
  • fat daddyfat daddy Posts: 2,605
    Everyone that beats me must be cheating ..... oooh I have a lot in common With Greg Lemond
  • ocdupalaisocdupalais Posts: 3,947
    It's not strictly cheating, as such - but ethically/morally questions were raised (especially by Jason's mum)....
    In the obstacle race at school sports day when I was 5, my best mate Jason was leading when he held the ground netting up for me as we crawled under, as it was clearly hindering: I went on to win and get the gold rosette.
  • bobmcstuff wrote:
    Sometimes I'm too lazy to think of my own posts so I just quote the person above and put "+1"

    +1
  • smithy21smithy21 Posts: 2,204
    I have never cheated at anything in my life and I challenge anyone to prove otherwise.
  • k1875k1875 Posts: 485
    I held the egg with my other hand in the egg and spoon race when I was 6. I was just levelling the playing field, everyone was doing it and everyone knows I'd have won anyway.

    If you're looking in Oprah I'm available, just call my guy and we'll work something out.
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    Nothing to see here
    I'm sorry you don't believe in miracles
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    Not cheating, but once in a European Cup (Division C) match the umpire threatened to give me a red card for smoking on the substitutes bench.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • ProssPross Posts: 29,559
    I don't count air shots when playing golf and class them as practice swings plus when playing winter rules I sometimes tee the ball up on top of the grass.

    I've also been guilty of using anything I can within the rules to get an advantage when running and cycling including beetroot juice and L Arganine. It's not cheating but it's a grey area as it allows me to keep going longer than my natural state would.
  • ridgeriderridgerider Posts: 2,843
    OCDuPalais wrote:
    It's not strictly cheating, as such - but ethically/morally questions were raised (especially by Jason's mum)....
    In the obstacle race at school sports day when I was 5, my best mate Jason was leading when he held the ground netting up for me as we crawled under, as it was clearly hindering: I went on to win and get the gold rosette.
    +1
    Half man, Half bike
  • Lanterne_RogueLanterne_Rogue Posts: 3,330
    I once started eating the magic mushrooms that were growing on the rugby pitch during a spectacularly boring second year house match. I was playing at fullback, and my team had all the fat kids playing in the forwards, so they just kept sticking it up their jumper and rumbling over the line.

    I doubt it was performance enhancing: at some point our opposition actually got hold of the ball and stuck a high clearance in. I'm told the ball bounced off my head whilst I stood there grinning.
  • crispybug2crispybug2 Posts: 2,915
    During my rugby playing days I often played open side flanker (my personal favourite position on the rugby field) and frankly if you weren't doing your best to get away with cheating then you weren't doing your job properly!!!
  • Lanterne_RogueLanterne_Rogue Posts: 3,330
    crispybug2 wrote:
    During my rugby playing days I often played open side flanker (my personal favourite position on the rugby field) and frankly if you weren't doing your best to get away with cheating then you weren't doing your job properly!!!

    After realising that being in the backs was boring, guess where I moved to. And I quite agree about cheating being nine tenths of the role (the other tenth being not getting spotted)...
  • You're all, to a poster, unmitigated shameless scoundrels. Maybe a scally or two in here too.
  • slim_boy_fatslim_boy_fat Posts: 1,810
    I'm going to tip Kimmage off about you all.
  • secretsqirrelsecretsqirrel Posts: 1,235
    I walked part of the way and still got my 10m swimming badge

    Suck it up buttercup

    How transparent were your speedos?

    I'll get my coat................you can wear it if necessary.
  • ProssPross Posts: 29,559
    I'm going to tip Kimmage off about you all.

    The rugby cheats should be OK then.

    Edit - actually that's his new target isn't it?
  • ducknumber1ducknumber1 Posts: 993
    I've lost a lot of respect for some posters here.

    Not from cheating, but those admitting to playing union.
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    One thing I have learned from playing club hockey for over twenty years and being club secretary for ten of those is that the lower down the levels you go, the more dubious practices there are.

    Ringers is the biggest one. Playing people who normally play at a higher level. Sometimes it's out of necessity. Sometimes it's legal according to the rules. And sometimes it's just cheating. But going right up against the line when necessary is all part of the game - we all know this. I've got a (third tier) cup semi-final next month that we all really want to win - we've been debating whether it would be right to bring one particularly player (now a coach) out of retirement - he could probably win the game single-handed. I don't think we will by the way, because even though legal it would cause an almighty kerfuffle.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    Here's a story from my days as club secretary for my hockey team.

    A few years back the league introduced some draconian punishments for failing to turn up for matches. One of our lower teams was playing at Aberyswyth - a good 2.5 hour drive away - and he was struggling to find a team available. He couldn't cancel as it would effect teams below him. So the captain, myself the secretary, and an ex-chairman agreed to phone up the opposition and pretend the match had taken place - 10-0 win to them obviously. This wasn't Aberystwyth's first time making this arrangement.

    All was good. Right up until our club Chairman got wind of it and ratted us out. Obviously, the team captain went under the bus - he acted alone.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • pinnopinno Posts: 42,708
    I have never cheated but I was sent off in my only appearance in a competitive Hockey match.

    I was asked to go in goal for the School match against Kircudbright as I was a cricket player and there was some fear from some of the sweaties about facing a hard ball stood between 2 posts. Both GK's were out for whatever reason.
    It was a cold, bitter afternoon and I stood there with limited padding and very bored whilst leaning up against one side of the goal post thinking what an effing way to spend an afternoon.
    All the play to that point was the other end of the pitch until I heard a load of shouting and there before me was a mass of players running towards me and a ball that bounced a couple of yards in front of me. Perfect delivery - I got my front foot to the pitch of the second or 3rd bounce and drove it skyward - worthy of a 4 at least roughly towards the imaginary covers. Had I missed it was a goal but this was a slow moving object in comparison to the bowling machine.
    All the players watched open mouthed as it sailed over their heads (with some left hand side on it - damn curved Hockey bat) towards the right hand side of the opposite half. The whistle blew and I was sent off for dangerous play but eternally grateful for an early opportunity to get a hot shower as it was one of those days where it was so cold, it was hard to get the fingers working to undo the buttons on my shirt.

    Later, (the ref being our cricket coach), gave me a pat on the shoulder for '"one helluva stroke except my follow through wasn't very straight" Cheers mate.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 25,479
    edited March 2017
    Pinno wrote:
    Perfect delivery - I got my front foot to the pitch of the second or 3rd bounce and drove it skyward - worthy of a 4 at least roughly towards the imaginary covers. Had I missed it was a goal but this was a slow moving object in comparison to the bowling machine.
    All the players watched open mouthed as it sailed over their heads (with some left hand side on it - damn curved Hockey bat) towards the right hand side of the opposite half. The whistle blew and I was sent off for dangerous play but eternally grateful for an early opportunity to get a hot shower as it was one of those days where it was so cold, it was hard to get the fingers working to undo the buttons on my shirt.
    Two points here from the forum expert.

    1. Why are you hitting the ball? You have pads and kickers for a reason. Use them

    2. I've never seen anyone get sent off for dangerous play. The umpire was bent. An ex-GB keeper called Simon Mason developed a technique at free hits from the back of flipping the ball up and booting it.
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • FocusZingFocusZing Posts: 4,373
    I walked part of the way and still got my 10m swimming badge

    Suck it up buttercup

    Funny that. I would say that to someone who was too bone idle not to swim 10 metres. It seems like this thread is for people who need to develop moral fibre, they are cheating themselves.
  • ProssPross Posts: 29,559
    I've lost a lot of respect for some posters here.

    Not from cheating, but those admitting to playing union.

    Ah, someone who believes they are superior as they've learned to count to 6 :lol:
  • bompingtonbompington Posts: 7,674
    RichN95 wrote:
    Pinno wrote:
    Perfect delivery - I got my front foot to the pitch of the second or 3rd bounce and drove it skyward - worthy of a 4 at least roughly towards the imaginary covers. Had I missed it was a goal but this was a slow moving object in comparison to the bowling machine.
    All the players watched open mouthed as it sailed over their heads (with some left hand side on it - damn curved Hockey bat) towards the right hand side of the opposite half. The whistle blew and I was sent off for dangerous play but eternally grateful for an early opportunity to get a hot shower as it was one of those days where it was so cold, it was hard to get the fingers working to undo the buttons on my shirt.
    Two points here from the forum expert.

    1. Why are you hitting the ball? You have pads and kickers for a reason. Use them

    2. I've never seen anyone get sent off for dangerous play. The umpire was bent. An ex-GB keeper called Simon Mason developed a technique at free hits from the back of flipping the ball up and booting it.

    As a (fairly decent) hockey keeper in my schooldays, I used to thoroughly enjoy the psychological aspect of intimidating the opposition forwards. They would generally melt away pretty fast when it was obvious that I was getting to the the ball first - I've always been faster than I look - and a heavy duty aerial kick was coming. Anything that landed in my own half was a disappointment.

    So no cheating tales to tell, but I may occasionally have accidentally taken out players who somehow got conflated with the ball.
  • ddraverddraver Posts: 23,197
    I never scrummaged straight in my whole "career" as a prop.

    (calling my "weekends playing rugby between drinking" a career is also kinda cheating)
    We're in danger of confusing passion with incompetence
    - @ddraver
  • pinnopinno Posts: 42,708
    RichN95 wrote:
    Pinno wrote:
    Perfect...shirt.

    Two points here from the forum expert.

    1. Why are you hitting the ball? You have pads and kickers for a reason. Use them.

    You are assuming:
    A) That I knew what I was doing.
    B) That I had any experience/coaching.
    C) That I understood the rules.

    Besides, it was begging to be hit and I was seriously bored (and cold).

    This is not high level stuff - a state school in the back of beyond in a town with a high level of unemployment. It was mainly about participation and little else. If you knew the right end of the Hockey stick from the other, you could be on the team.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
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