Pain = Excellent swearing combo's

mr_eddy

Anyone else notice that when you are in pain especially if its unexpected you get really creative with venting your frustration.

I stubbed my toe last night and screamed out "son of a c**nty f**k wh*re" - I was genuinely impressed at my new found verbal creativity.

mr_eddy

Maybe one of those mental Japanese game show things could pick this up and run with it - They give you a paper cut or a slight bash on the funny bone with a hammer and the person with the most inventive collection of swear words gets a relaxing spa weekend !

motogull

mr_eddy wrote:

I stubbed my toe last night and screamed out "son of a c**nty f**k wh*re" - I was genuinely impressed at my new found verbal creativity.

That's tough to beat. Deserved an audience. Ideally, an old biddy or a clergyman.

briantrumpet

The pain reduction from swearing apparently works best if you aren't a frequent profanicist. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypoalges ... f_swearing - so don't use up all your good combinations all at once.

964cup

Ah, the joys of the foam roller. It's the only time I find religion, in order for blasphemy to be more satisfying.

mr_goo

mr_eddy wrote:

Anyone else notice that when you are in pain especially if its unexpected you get really creative with venting your frustration.

I stubbed my toe last night and screamed out "son of a c**nty f**k wh*re" - I was genuinely impressed at my new found verbal creativity.

And I bet the pain abated somewhat after the string if expletives. Swearing is one of the best analgesics.

jgsi

Try being squashed into a kitchen sink cupboard trying to re fit a new tap hose for a new tap around a gas meter , a previous numpty diy er had left a huge blob of solder making the fitment almost impossible, trying to saw a clean edge with just a hacksaw blade wrapped in gorilla tape as there is no ******* space to do anything or even see anything properly..

veronese68

The funniest swearing I ever heard was from an Austrian ski instructor when I was about 15. The fact that his outbursts have survived over 30 years in my memory is testament to their quality. My favourite was "You bloody, f@cking, cnuting, w@nking censored bubble."

rjsterry

JGSI wrote:

Try being squashed into a kitchen sink cupboard trying to re fit a new tap hose for a new tap around a gas meter , a previous numpty diy er had left a huge blob of solder making the fitment almost impossible, trying to saw a clean edge with just a hacksaw blade wrapped in gorilla tape as there is no ******* space to do anything or even see anything properly..

I once found my self in a similar situation head first under a kitchen sink. Turning the water off to disconnect the tap (previous "plumber" having not fitted any servicing valves), the stopcock head sheared off. Both parents were in the room passing tools and cups of tea, so I had to restrain myself to a very heart-felt "bother!". Eventually managed to file a flat onto the stump and get some mole grips onto it and slowly inch it to the off position.

pblakeney

Takes me back to when I was playing school football.
An extremely tall, and fat, lad (maybe 17 stone) clattered into me, then fell on top of me.
Expletives apparently ensued.
I was not only sent off for foul and abusive language, but had to run 4 laps of the pitch for my sins.
I never did find out what horrific curses I had used. :shock:

Mikey23

Fudging doo-dahs

secretsam

Ar53y f##kblankets

crescent

We once owned a Renault Scenic - anyone else who has owned one will know that it has numerous combinations of seating configuration. I was "playing" with the seats when one of them locked itself, not round the metal pin on the floor but round my index finger - properly locked around it, essentially the entire seat was dangling from my (now bleeding) finger. At this point our lovely, elderly, ever-so-polite neighbour appeared at the end of the driveway for a chat.

Neighbour : Good morning, what are you up to today?
Me : Aaaaagh, J****, f*****g C****t, you c*****g f****r. Good morning Andrea, oh nothing much.....