Saying thanks to drivers behind you?

wolfsbane2k
wolfsbane2k Posts: 3,056
edited November 2015 in Commuting chat
Hey.

How do you guys & gals say thanks to drivers that stay behind you and make sure you get the more than the right amount of space, not be a pushy idiot, ensure they don't left hook you, or read your intention to move to "take the lane" at a roundabout and back off?

I've normally done it by a right handed thumbs up in the middle of my back, rather than hand out to the side for the thumbs up which could be misconstrued as a turning signal, especially if I don't know if they will overtake at any point to nod in thanks at them.

However, this morning, it went horribly wrong - someone deliberately slowed down as I looked to take the lane about 50m before a roundabout, and having taken the lane gave the thumbs up.
Cue instant aggression, reving and tailgating from driver, and once around the roundabout, they overtook closely, pulled in front of me, and then slammed on the brakes and started screaming while climbing out of the car.

Turns out he had thought I had given him the middle finger :(

So - do you do it, and if so, how have you done it?
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Comments

  • iPete
    iPete Posts: 6,076
    edited October 2015
    Sorry I shouldn't laugh but I have often wondered if my thumbs up would ever be mistaken as giving the finger!
  • I see it as encouraging good behaviour. I usual raise my hand but have worried before that it could be misconstrued as sarcasm
  • timothyw
    timothyw Posts: 2,482
    Just a fairly discrete wave. If they recognise it as thanks, great, if they think it's a turn signal then my road positioning usually makes clear it wasn't shortly afterwards.

    I rarely thank anyone before they've overtaken me so it's hard to envisage the situation above arising. I occasionally do a hat tip/salute type motion once they're past. I look forward to the first driver who takes it for a 'dick head' motion.

    It is a shame that the safe drivers are so often the exception that we feel we have to thank them.
  • daddy0
    daddy0 Posts: 686
    I don't say thanks to people who follow the highway code / law - it's what they're meant to do and shouldn't need thanking for it! Come to think of it I would say that NOBODY actually follows the 2 second rule, so you shouldn't thank anyone???!

    If a car is tailgating / too close then I calmly hold my hand out as if to signal them to stop, it tends to calm them down or at least confuses them into slowing.

    I do say thanks to drivers who move out of my way as I over/undertake them though, just a little wave does it.
  • Stag on
    Stag on Posts: 99
    I give a thumbs up too. I always make sure i hang it out to the right hand side to ensure that it would be physiologically impossible for it to be a middle finger. There is little chance of it being construed as a right hand turn signal on the routes I use (which are pretty junction free)

    Otherwise I'll give them a quick friendly wave if they overtake particularly wide.

    There is a school of thought amongst the advanced driving fraternity which is that you should never make any gestures at other road users, however it is good to know there are some decent considerate drivers out there and I try and thank them if they have looked out for me (rare that it is)
  • Origamist
    Origamist Posts: 807
    Right hand up, slightly to side, palm open. I only usually do this for drivers who use all of opposing lane. At night, I flash my light as a thank you. Never had an issue.
  • I'm overly polite in most situations, so I tend to do the "thumbs up a the side of me" thing if someone has slowed behind to let me pull over to the centre of the road to be able to turn, or slowed behind at a round-about.

    But then I thank people who have waited for me to overtake etc whilst I'm driving, so I don't see how it is much different. Even if they are supposed to wait, saying thanks does no harm
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    Basically a wave with the back of my palm raised about head/shoulder height, fingers pointed upwards so as not to confuse with a turn signal.
  • Pufftmw
    Pufftmw Posts: 1,941
    I thank drivers for courteous/considerate behaviour. Often its just a little wave from which ever side without hands leaving bars, other times (if safe) low lift of hand as a wave, then turn into a thumbs up. Sometimes a look and nod of the head.

    In the OP's case of someone overtaking wide/clear then the side wave would be used as they start to draw alongside.
  • slowbike
    slowbike Posts: 8,498
    Just a fairly discrete wave. If they recognise it as thanks, great, if they think it's a turn signal then my road positioning usually makes clear it wasn't shortly afterwards.

    It is a shame that the safe drivers are so often the exception that we feel we have to thank them.

    yup - just a discrete wave as they're going past - or if dark, then I flash my headlight (hand over the light to darken it) a couple of times.
  • kurako
    kurako Posts: 1,098
    A raised hand if someone is being especially considerate or a nod if that is not practical. But really just avoiding 'The Stare' or 'Confused Look' is about the best people should expect for not driving like a mentalist.
  • jspash
    jspash Posts: 107
    It's interesting that someone that you thought to be a considerate driver was a mere miscommunication away from the red mist taking over and possibly killing a vulnerable road user. (I might be exaggerating a bit)

    Having been in this type of situation, my stance these days is to keep to myself. Let their smug self-satisfaction for doing the right thing be their reward. If it's enough for me... :)
  • pblakeney
    pblakeney Posts: 27,075
    Basically a wave with the back of my palm raised about head/shoulder height, fingers pointed upwards so as not to confuse with a turn signal.
    This.
    But a bit more discrete. Just a couple of inches off the hoods/bars as they pass.
    Quite often get a flash of indicators once they have completed the manoeuvre. Which is nice.
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
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  • Hey.

    How do you guys & gals say thanks to drivers that stay behind you and make sure you get the more than the right amount of space, not be a pushy idiot, ensure they don't left hook you, or read your intention to move to "take the lane" at a roundabout and back off?

    I've normally done it by a right handed thumbs up in the middle of my back, rather than hand out to the side for the thumbs up which could be misconstrued as a turning signal, especially if I don't know if they will overtake at any point to nod in thanks at them.

    However, this morning, it went horribly wrong - someone deliberately slowed down as I looked to take the lane about 50m before a roundabout, and having taken the lane gave the thumbs up.
    Cue instant aggression, reving and tailgating from driver, and once around the roundabout, they overtook closely, pulled in front of me, and then slammed on the brakes and started screaming while climbing out of the car.

    Turns out he had thought I had given him the middle finger :(

    So - do you do it, and if so, how have you done it?

    Did you get a chance to explain his mistake and get an apology?
  • mamil314
    mamil314 Posts: 1,103
    Raise hand and show back of open palm with fingers upwards.
  • sophidog
    sophidog Posts: 180
    Basically a wave with the back of my palm raised about head/shoulder height, fingers pointed upwards so as not to confuse with a turn signal.
    this
    it's a combination of 'Thanks for your patience' when they've had to slow down for me and encouragement for them to keep on doing it in the future.
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  • cruff
    cruff Posts: 1,518
    I always say thanks when a driver goes out of their way to be courteous. For instance, on my commute there's a 2km stretch leading up to the A3 which is jammed every single morning. There's a bike lane on the inside for part of it, but it's pointless using it since it's full of crap, and drivers often sit half inside it anyway - so I always filter on the outside (must be frustrating to see a cyclist disappear up the road in front of you like a moped!)

    A few drivers every morning see me in their wing/rearview mirror and they pull in to give me more room to pass (always appreciated with artics thundering past in the other direction). I generally give them a 'cheers' as I pass and put my hand up to acknowledge - though I've used the thumbs up in the past.
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  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    I happens so rarely i forget to most times, but yes a similar wave as if passing another cyclist usually does it.

    actually i've seen a few puzzled looking drivers when caught in between passing groups of nodding and waving cyclists, either they're think we all know each other or its some kind of anti car cult :lol:
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  • elbowloh
    elbowloh Posts: 7,078
    Yeah usually give a thumbs up. Also, say if I'm turning right and they are going in the other direction and they let you turn, I usually say thank you and even if they can't hear you, they can see your mouth moving in a clear "thank you" way.

    I know some people say that they're just doing what they're supposed to, but like it's mentioned above, if you can reinforce good behaviour, I do think it makes a difference.
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  • but yes a similar wave as if passing another cyclist usually does it.

    is this a sticks thing?
  • wolfsbane2k
    wolfsbane2k Posts: 3,056
    Interesting topic then :)

    I don't know why I don't use the right hand at shoulder height thanks, as I do when I'm driving - that would be easier! it might be a mis-conception about the visibility thing, but i'll definitely do that in future!
    jspash wrote:
    It's interesting that someone that you thought to be a considerate driver was a mere miscommunication away from the red mist taking over and possibly killing a vulnerable road user. (I might be exaggerating a bit)
    Yep, I quickly thought I'd got him completely wrong and he'd just fluffed a gear change rather than deliberately holding back. That may well have been the case. That red mist is nasty when it happens.
    Did you get a chance to explain his mistake and get an apology?
    Er, no. It didn't start or end on nice terms. He didn't believe me at all, despite me explicitly saying "why" I had said thanks. I think he just didn't want to back down.
    Intent on Cycling Commuting on a budget, but keep on breaking/crashing/finding nice stuff to buy.
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  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    but yes a similar wave as if passing another cyclist usually does it.

    is this a sticks thing?

    Yep believe or not in the rest of the country people are sometimes nice to each other and have been known to make random (pointless) conversation with total strangers.

    I know it sounds crazy but its true, I'm sort of getting used to it ....after 9 years.
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    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
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  • awavey
    awavey Posts: 2,368
    I might wave a thanks at a driver ahead of me as I cycle towards them if theyve patiently waited specifically to let me through, I dont thank drivers for not driving into me when they overtake, sorry but its the least they can do, as far Im concerned in those situations, and many of them certainly attempt to do alot less than that.

    and yeah I do think waves or even thumbs up can be misinterpreted in so many ways as well. drivers arent good at reading sign language
  • pblakeney
    pblakeney Posts: 27,075
    I might wave a thanks at a driver ahead of me as I cycle towards them if theyve patiently waited specifically to let me through, I dont thank drivers for not driving into me when they overtake, sorry but its the least they can do, as far Im concerned in those situations, and many of them certainly attempt to do alot less than that.

    and yeah I do think waves or even thumbs up can be misinterpreted in so many ways as well. drivers arent good at reading sign language
    Sorry, but it is not the least they can do. The least they can do is drive over you.
    It is the least that they can do, reasonably.
    Positive encouragement for doing good deeds means they are more likely to repeat the action and is hardly a major effort.
    Disclaimer, I am encouraging rewarding those who wait until it is safe to pass, not every passing manoeuvre.
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
    I am not sure. You have no chance.
    Veronese68 wrote:
    PB is the most sensible person on here.
  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 75,661
    Just get on with it and leave the communication to where you want to turn etc.
  • pblakeney
    pblakeney Posts: 27,075
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    Just get on with it and leave the communication to where you want to turn etc.
    Life in the smoke, eh?
    The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
    I am not sure. You have no chance.
    Veronese68 wrote:
    PB is the most sensible person on here.
  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 75,661
    Not really. I havent lived my entire life there!

    Communication through windows is not ideal at the best of times. Best stick to essential communication to avoid confusion.

    Generally I think you lot over estimate how much one's actions affect the perception of others.

    If everyone got on with it rather than concerning themselves with giving judgement on how good or bad someone else's road use is there'd be a lot less stress.

    Most people won't care what any other road user thinks about the quality of their road use. Let's face it everyone 'knows' they're above average...
  • Stag on
    Stag on Posts: 99
    Thanked two drivers today (one of a very patient artic) with 'horizontal thumbs up' and all was well.

    I think that if you are happy to dish out abuse for poor behaviour you should also dish out praise for positive behaviour.
  • MrSweary
    MrSweary Posts: 1,699
    I like to give a thumbs up if someone has been considerate - even if it doesn't have any effect on them it makes me feel better. If you keep your hand low it is pretty hard to misinterpret it as giving someone the bird.

    I tend to find that small acts of kindness or consideration improve ones mood if making or receiving and may even make the recipient more likely to pass them on. Even if just brightens up their day for a second it is worth it. It isn't as if it takes any effort at all and lord knows London could do with a bit more of people being nicer to each other.

    Of course a thumbs up has the advantage that it can easily be a sarcastic gesture too. 8)
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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 79,667
    If...
    Most....
    Should...

    A lot of it is hypothetical nonsense. The reality is that a wave and a bit of courtesy costs you nothing and may encourage that sort of behaviour more often. Like when you're driving and a car lets you out, you wave or flash your lights. When a car pulls over to let you through, a wave or a flash or lights. Maybe its a reflection on me and my friends, but when they pull over to be courteous to another car driver and the other driver doesn't wave or acknowledge it, I and they usually comment on the rudeness of it.

    Why would it be no different on a bike?