The good deed thread
finchy
Posts: 6,686
I get a real kick out of helping other people and today was one of those days that presented an unmissable opportunity.
Standing at the self-service checkout in Asda, a family of salad-dodgers waddled up behind me and starting putting their microwave meals, oven chips, etc. on the belt. I then proceeded to scan my stuff and pay as slowly as possible without it becoming too obvious. The extra time they were standing there means they were burning off a tiny bit more flab than they would do when they went home to park their lardy ar5es in front of TV. Knowing I'd helped a whole family fight the fat gave me a nice warm glow inside. I can't wait until tomorrow when I will once again help somebody, whether they appreciate it or not.
Standing at the self-service checkout in Asda, a family of salad-dodgers waddled up behind me and starting putting their microwave meals, oven chips, etc. on the belt. I then proceeded to scan my stuff and pay as slowly as possible without it becoming too obvious. The extra time they were standing there means they were burning off a tiny bit more flab than they would do when they went home to park their lardy ar5es in front of TV. Knowing I'd helped a whole family fight the fat gave me a nice warm glow inside. I can't wait until tomorrow when I will once again help somebody, whether they appreciate it or not.
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I put healthy items in other peoples trolleys, every little helpsmy isetta is a 300cc bike0
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I'll have a word her Maj if I see her* and put you forward for a OBE. Selfless you are, and a credit to the community.
*HRH doesn't often get to my local ASDA but I can't rule it out
The older I get, the better I was.0 -
You were probably doing some of us a good deed by sticking to ASDA"I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]0
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Well, I wouldn't want to bump into Lord Stevo shopping in Harrods for smoked caviar. I do sometimes cycle to Waitrose for my cheese, though. In Asda, blue cheese is labelled as "speciality cheese". :roll: :roll: In Waitrose it's just "cheese".0
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johnfinch wrote:Well, I wouldn't want to bump into Lord Stevo shopping in Harrods for smoked caviar.
A man delivers his hampers.0 -
Ballysmate wrote:johnfinch wrote:Well, I wouldn't want to bump into Lord Stevo shopping in Harrods for smoked caviar.
A man delivers his hampers.
On a diamond-encrusted horsedrawn carriage.0 -
johnfinch wrote:In Asda, blue cheese is labelled as "speciality cheese". :roll: :roll: In Waitrose it's just "cheese"."I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]0
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Stevo 666 wrote:johnfinch wrote:In Asda, blue cheese is labelled as "speciality cheese". :roll: :roll: In Waitrose it's just "cheese".
When I was at uni I had some fairly expensive (£2.50 is expensive for a student) blue cheese in the fridge. The cleaners came in, I heard the fridge open, then I heard:
"Oh my God, look at this mouldy cheese."
"Euuurgggghhhh! That's disgusting! Chuck it away."
I had to jump down two flights of stairs to get down into the kitchen before the cleaner made it to the bin, then I had to explain why blue cheese is actually OK to eat. :roll: :roll: :roll:0 -
In our house blue cheese means a trip to the clinic. :shock:0
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Cheese? Bl00dy luxury. When I were a lad..."I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]0
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johnfinch wrote:Stevo 666 wrote:johnfinch wrote:In Asda, blue cheese is labelled as "speciality cheese". :roll: :roll: In Waitrose it's just "cheese".
When I was at uni I had some fairly expensive (£2.50 is expensive for a student) blue cheese in the fridge. The cleaners came in, I heard the fridge open, then I heard:
"Oh my God, look at this mouldy cheese."
"Euuurgggghhhh! That's disgusting! Chuck it away."
I had to jump down two flights of stairs to get down into the kitchen before the cleaner made it to the bin, then I had to explain why blue cheese is actually OK to eat. :roll: :roll: :roll:
Reminds me of this article http://www.independent.co.uk/news/busin ... 88916.html especially the 5th paragraph about different types of ham. Will the likes of Stevo be tempted into a Tesco...0 -
johnfinch wrote:Stevo 666 wrote:johnfinch wrote:In Asda, blue cheese is labelled as "speciality cheese". :roll: :roll: In Waitrose it's just "cheese".
When I was at uni I had some fairly expensive (£2.50 is expensive for a student) blue cheese in the fridge. The cleaners came in, I heard the fridge open, then I heard:
"Oh my God, look at this mouldy cheese."
"Euuurgggghhhh! That's disgusting! Chuck it away."
I had to jump down two flights of stairs to get down into the kitchen before the cleaner made it to the bin, then I had to explain why blue cheese is actually OK to eat. :roll: :roll: :roll:
You had cleaners? :shock:
Two women standing in Morrisson's:
"Look, this hasnae got preservatives"
"Thats' nae gid"seanoconn - gruagach craic!0 -
Went to a wedding a few years ago, it was that branch of the family that we pretend dont exist.
Anyhow, the reception is at a football club, was concerned that the car was gonna get nicked so found a table by the window. Helped myself to some baguette, chedder and pate, everything else was deep fried and pretty awful looking.
Spread the pate on the bread to bite into it and realise it was actually a chocolate flavour mousse with a brown jelly on the top.Life isnt like a box of chocolates, its like a bag of pic n mix.0 -
Why did you not simply pretend to attend?The above may be fact, or fiction, I may be serious, I may be jesting.
I am not sure. You have no chance.Veronese68 wrote:PB is the most sensible person on here.0 -
johnfinch wrote:I get a real kick out of helping other people and today was one of those days that presented an unmissable opportunity.
Standing at the self-service checkout in Asda, a family of salad-dodgers waddled up behind me and starting putting their microwave meals, oven chips, etc. on the belt. I then proceeded to scan my stuff and pay as slowly as possible without it becoming too obvious. The extra time they were standing there means they were burning off a tiny bit more flab than they would do when they went home to park their lardy ar5es in front of TV. Knowing I'd helped a whole family fight the fat gave me a nice warm glow inside. I can't wait until tomorrow when I will once again help somebody, whether they appreciate it or not.
??? so who would have been at fault if they'd a gotten tired of waiting and decided to eat you???0