The good deed thread

I get a real kick out of helping other people and today was one of those days that presented an unmissable opportunity.
Standing at the self-service checkout in Asda, a family of salad-dodgers waddled up behind me and starting putting their microwave meals, oven chips, etc. on the belt. I then proceeded to scan my stuff and pay as slowly as possible without it becoming too obvious. The extra time they were standing there means they were burning off a tiny bit more flab than they would do when they went home to park their lardy ar5es in front of TV. Knowing I'd helped a whole family fight the fat gave me a nice warm glow inside. I can't wait until tomorrow when I will once again help somebody, whether they appreciate it or not.
Standing at the self-service checkout in Asda, a family of salad-dodgers waddled up behind me and starting putting their microwave meals, oven chips, etc. on the belt. I then proceeded to scan my stuff and pay as slowly as possible without it becoming too obvious. The extra time they were standing there means they were burning off a tiny bit more flab than they would do when they went home to park their lardy ar5es in front of TV. Knowing I'd helped a whole family fight the fat gave me a nice warm glow inside. I can't wait until tomorrow when I will once again help somebody, whether they appreciate it or not.
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*HRH doesn't often get to my local ASDA but I can't rule it out
The older I get, the better I was.
A man delivers his hampers.
On a diamond-encrusted horsedrawn carriage.
When I was at uni I had some fairly expensive (£2.50 is expensive for a student) blue cheese in the fridge. The cleaners came in, I heard the fridge open, then I heard:
"Oh my God, look at this mouldy cheese."
"Euuurgggghhhh! That's disgusting! Chuck it away."
I had to jump down two flights of stairs to get down into the kitchen before the cleaner made it to the bin, then I had to explain why blue cheese is actually OK to eat. :roll: :roll: :roll:
Reminds me of this article http://www.independent.co.uk/news/busin ... 88916.html especially the 5th paragraph about different types of ham. Will the likes of Stevo be tempted into a Tesco...
You had cleaners? :shock:
Two women standing in Morrisson's:
"Look, this hasnae got preservatives"
"Thats' nae gid"
Anyhow, the reception is at a football club, was concerned that the car was gonna get nicked so found a table by the window. Helped myself to some baguette, chedder and pate, everything else was deep fried and pretty awful looking.
Spread the pate on the bread to bite into it and realise it was actually a chocolate flavour mousse with a brown jelly on the top.
I am not sure. You have no chance.
Wish i had done, ended up having to do 3 trips between the church and the reception rather than the other guests having to walk.
??? so who would have been at fault if they'd a gotten tired of waiting and decided to eat you???