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Kirby Drinking game

philwintphilwint Posts: 763
edited May 2014 in Pro race
As we can't escape him, how about embracing his "style" and getting pissed at the same time

Take a drink:

[EDITED TO INCLUDE OTHER'S SUGGESTIONS BELOW]
    Wrongly identifies a rider Says - as you know - as you can see - Satellite riders - Playing the long game - Pale of pallor - Relaying back on - Vuelta, Tour of Spain - (something mundane) ...for goodness sake - Brutalised - I'll be bound - world of pain - X can now TT his way to the finish - Light the touch paper - And X detonates the peloton - The business end of the race - On the nose / X is on the nose of the peloton - Makes hopeless sprint stage prediction - Will he deliver today? - Boy did he deliver! - don't forget Any mention of beards Any factual error Here come the chargers Identifies as an outside bet drink two fingers Chuckles irritatingly

Finish drink (down in one)
    Says - such as this - I reckon BMC have got a plan, you know - Damiano Cunego - resplendent in his beard - Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road - Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel isnt even in the race raises the decibels in excitement when nothing has happened

Any others to add to the list?
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Posts

  • argyllflyerargyllflyer Posts: 893
    Stomach pump by the queen stage?
  • blazing_saddlesblazing_saddles Posts: 16,138
    Oh hello.....
    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • CrampeurCrampeur Posts: 1,065
    "Here come the chargers"

    FFS...
  • Richmond RacerRichmond Racer Posts: 8,561
    "I reckon BMC have got a plan, you know"
  • TurfleTurfle Posts: 3,762
    "Satellite riders"
    "playing the long game"
    "pale of pallor"
  • MechanismMechanism Posts: 895
    "Relaying back on"
    "Vuelta, Tour of Spain"
    "Damiano Cunego"
  • argyllflyerargyllflyer Posts: 893
    "(something mundane) ...for goodness sake"

    "brutalised"

    "(makes hopeless sprint stage prediction)"
  • "I'll be bound..."
  • argyllflyerargyllflyer Posts: 893
    "world of pain"
  • RichN95.RichN95. Posts: 24,284
    Someone on the spoiler thread complains about Carlton Kirby

    Double the drink if they're not actually watching
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • argyllflyerargyllflyer Posts: 893
    RichN95 wrote:
    Someone on the spoiler thread complains about Carlton Kirby

    Double the drink if they're not actually watching

    Triple it if it's Dave Harmon.
  • bill_gatesbill_gates Posts: 466
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.


    "I like riding in my car, it's not quite a Jaguar."
  • argyllflyerargyllflyer Posts: 893
    Bill Gates wrote:
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.

    Was impressed with their calling of the shenanigans between Guardini and Viviani at 2km to go then Cav and the headnudge. They mist have had their noses at the screen.
  • Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team.
  • adr82adr82 Posts: 4,002
    Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road.
  • blazing_saddlesblazing_saddles Posts: 16,138
    Bill Gates wrote:
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.

    Was impressed with their calling of the shenanigans between Guardini and Viviani at 2km to go then Cav and the headnudge. They mist have had their noses at the screen.

    After already had said Snr Viviani riding for.......................Lampre. :oops:
    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • mr_pollmr_poll Posts: 1,612
    Take a drink:

    X can now TT his way to the finish
    Light the touch paper
    And X detonates the peloton
    The business end of the race
    On the nose / X is on the nose of the peloton (is this a real cycling phrase or a Kirbyism as he uses it, alot)
    Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel is racing


    Down a drink:

    Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel isnt even in the race
  • Daz555Daz555 Posts: 4,040
    Kirby gets a hard time and I'm not sure he deserves it.

    This is light hearted enough however.

    I'd add a "down in one" for any time he says a rider is "resplendent in his beard".
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • rick_chaseyrick_chasey Posts: 52,690 Lives Here
    Alcohol is too weak.

    Only hard drugs will suffice.
  • dish_dashdish_dash Posts: 4,986
    Alcohol is too weak.

    Only hard drugs will suffice.

    Says the city boy :wink:

    Trust all wannabe commentators have seen Eurosport's generous offer: http://www.digitaltveurope.net/173732/e ... mpetition/
  • bobonesbobones Posts: 1,033
    "Will he deliver today?"
    "Boy did he deliver!"

    and lots of other phrases using the word "deliver"!
  • Garry HGarry H Posts: 6,639
    "They are now entering the end game". Or is that Declan Quiqley? Can never remember anymore.
  • okgookgo Posts: 4,368
    philwint wrote:
    As we can't escape him, how about embracing his "style" and getting pissed at the same time

    Take a drink:
      Wrongly identifies a rider Says "as you know" Says "as you can see" Chuckles irritatingly Any other factual error

    Finish drink (down in one)
      Says "such as this"

    Any others to add to the list?


    He says "right now" all the time as well
    Blog on my first and now second season of proper riding/racing - www.firstseasonracing.com
  • ProssPross Posts: 25,456
    Every rider he identifies as an outside bet drink two fingers. Same for every time he raises the decibels in excitement when nothing has happened. I won't make anyone drink for mentions of Cunego as I wouldn't want to be responsible for liver failure.
  • TurfleTurfle Posts: 3,762
    Something about Betancur being miserable in interviews every single day, even though he's only even seen one interview with him.
  • pomtarrpomtarr Posts: 318
    ".....don't forget."
    "Difficult, difficult, lemon difficult"
  • Daz555Daz555 Posts: 4,040
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • philwintphilwint Posts: 763
    Daz555 wrote:
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!

    Original list updated :)
  • Daz555Daz555 Posts: 4,040
    philwint wrote:
    Daz555 wrote:
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!

    Original list updated :)
    Good man!

    These two:

    - Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road
    - Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team

    They sound a bit too vague for a drinking game. You can't down it in one if it requires a committee to determine if they need to do so! :mrgreen:
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • emaddenemadden Posts: 2,431
    "Ohhh".... imagine him shouting it. He does it every 10 seconds
    "Oh my goodness"...

    The guy is atrocious. I just bought the latest edition of Cycle Sport and was looking forward to the DVD with last years Giro. What a disaster. His commentry ruins the DVD - its just woeful.
    **************************************************
    www.dotcycling.com
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