Kirby Drinking game

philwint
philwint Posts: 763
edited May 2014 in Pro race
As we can't escape him, how about embracing his "style" and getting pissed at the same time

Take a drink:

[EDITED TO INCLUDE OTHER'S SUGGESTIONS BELOW]
    Wrongly identifies a rider Says - as you know - as you can see - Satellite riders - Playing the long game - Pale of pallor - Relaying back on - Vuelta, Tour of Spain - (something mundane) ...for goodness sake - Brutalised - I'll be bound - world of pain - X can now TT his way to the finish - Light the touch paper - And X detonates the peloton - The business end of the race - On the nose / X is on the nose of the peloton - Makes hopeless sprint stage prediction - Will he deliver today? - Boy did he deliver! - don't forget Any mention of beards Any factual error Here come the chargers Identifies as an outside bet drink two fingers Chuckles irritatingly

Finish drink (down in one)
    Says - such as this - I reckon BMC have got a plan, you know - Damiano Cunego - resplendent in his beard - Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road - Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel isnt even in the race raises the decibels in excitement when nothing has happened

Any others to add to the list?
Phil

www.philwinterbourne.co.uk
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Comments

  • argyllflyer
    argyllflyer Posts: 893
    Stomach pump by the queen stage?
  • blazing_saddles
    blazing_saddles Posts: 21,811
    Oh hello.....
    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • Crampeur
    Crampeur Posts: 1,065
    "Here come the chargers"

    FFS...
  • Richmond Racer
    Richmond Racer Posts: 8,561
    "I reckon BMC have got a plan, you know"
  • Turfle
    Turfle Posts: 3,762
    "Satellite riders"
    "playing the long game"
    "pale of pallor"
  • mechanism
    mechanism Posts: 891
    "Relaying back on"
    "Vuelta, Tour of Spain"
    "Damiano Cunego"
  • argyllflyer
    argyllflyer Posts: 893
    "(something mundane) ...for goodness sake"

    "brutalised"

    "(makes hopeless sprint stage prediction)"
  • poweredbyidris
    poweredbyidris Posts: 848
    "I'll be bound..."
  • argyllflyer
    argyllflyer Posts: 893
    "world of pain"
  • RichN95.
    RichN95. Posts: 27,147
    Someone on the spoiler thread complains about Carlton Kirby

    Double the drink if they're not actually watching
    Twitter: @RichN95
  • argyllflyer
    argyllflyer Posts: 893
    RichN95 wrote:
    Someone on the spoiler thread complains about Carlton Kirby

    Double the drink if they're not actually watching

    Triple it if it's Dave Harmon.
  • bill_gates
    bill_gates Posts: 469
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.

    "I like riding in my car, it's not quite a Jaguar."
  • argyllflyer
    argyllflyer Posts: 893
    Bill Gates wrote:
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.

    Was impressed with their calling of the shenanigans between Guardini and Viviani at 2km to go then Cav and the headnudge. They mist have had their noses at the screen.
  • littledove44
    littledove44 Posts: 871
    Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team.
  • adr82
    adr82 Posts: 4,002
    Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road.
  • blazing_saddles
    blazing_saddles Posts: 21,811
    argyllflyer wrote:
    Bill Gates wrote:
    'hiatus' is another of his commonly used words. :-)

    To give him his due on rider identification, over a few of the last races the TV company graphics have been less accurate than he was and in particular on Tour of Turkey today, both Carlton Kirby and Brian Smith called it right and the graphics did not.

    Was impressed with their calling of the shenanigans between Guardini and Viviani at 2km to go then Cav and the headnudge. They mist have had their noses at the screen.

    After already had said Snr Viviani riding for.......................Lampre. :oops:
    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • mr_poll
    mr_poll Posts: 1,547
    Take a drink:

    X can now TT his way to the finish
    Light the touch paper
    And X detonates the peloton
    The business end of the race
    On the nose / X is on the nose of the peloton (is this a real cycling phrase or a Kirbyism as he uses it, alot)
    Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel is racing


    Down a drink:

    Eulogises about Cadel - when Cadel isnt even in the race
  • Daz555
    Daz555 Posts: 3,976
    Kirby gets a hard time and I'm not sure he deserves it.

    This is light hearted enough however.

    I'd add a "down in one" for any time he says a rider is "resplendent in his beard".
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 72,540
    Alcohol is too weak.

    Only hard drugs will suffice.
    _
  • dish_dash
    dish_dash Posts: 5,557
    Rick Chasey wrote:
    Alcohol is too weak.

    Only hard drugs will suffice.

    Says the city boy :wink:

    Trust all wannabe commentators have seen Eurosport's generous offer: http://www.digitaltveurope.net/173732/e ... mpetition/
  • bobones
    bobones Posts: 1,215
    "Will he deliver today?"
    "Boy did he deliver!"

    and lots of other phrases using the word "deliver"!
  • Garry H
    Garry H Posts: 6,639
    "They are now entering the end game". Or is that Declan Quiqley? Can never remember anymore.
  • okgo
    okgo Posts: 4,368
    philwint wrote:
    As we can't escape him, how about embracing his "style" and getting pissed at the same time

    Take a drink:
      Wrongly identifies a rider Says "as you know" Says "as you can see" Chuckles irritatingly Any other factual error

    Finish drink (down in one)
      Says "such as this"

    Any others to add to the list?


    He says "right now" all the time as well
    Blog on my first and now second season of proper riding/racing - www.firstseasonracing.com
  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 40,452
    Every rider he identifies as an outside bet drink two fingers. Same for every time he raises the decibels in excitement when nothing has happened. I won't make anyone drink for mentions of Cunego as I wouldn't want to be responsible for liver failure.
  • Turfle
    Turfle Posts: 3,762
    Something about Betancur being miserable in interviews every single day, even though he's only even seen one interview with him.
  • pomtarr
    pomtarr Posts: 318
    ".....don't forget."
    "Difficult, difficult, lemon difficult"
  • Daz555
    Daz555 Posts: 3,976
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • philwint
    philwint Posts: 763
    Daz555 wrote:
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!

    Original list updated :)
    Phil

    www.philwinterbourne.co.uk
  • Daz555
    Daz555 Posts: 3,976
    philwint wrote:
    Daz555 wrote:
    OP - you need to update the thread with the current version of the Kirby drinking game!

    Original list updated :)
    Good man!

    These two:

    - Any sort of variation of "X makes the attack!", where X is any rider the camera has just caught apparently overtaking anyone else, however casually and in whatever position on the road
    - Identifying a team who are all "Working for xxxx". who subsequently pulls over after leading out someone else in the team

    They sound a bit too vague for a drinking game. You can't down it in one if it requires a committee to determine if they need to do so! :mrgreen:
    You only need two tools: WD40 and Duck Tape.
    If it doesn't move and should, use the WD40.
    If it shouldn't move and does, use the tape.
  • emadden
    emadden Posts: 2,431
    "Ohhh".... imagine him shouting it. He does it every 10 seconds
    "Oh my goodness"...

    The guy is atrocious. I just bought the latest edition of Cycle Sport and was looking forward to the DVD with last years Giro. What a disaster. His commentry ruins the DVD - its just woeful.
    **************************************************
    www.dotcycling.com
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