Carlton Kirby

16869707173

Comments

  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 52,348
    edited June 14

    That or marijuana.

    Yep. Remember Good morning Vietnam?: "I've never met a man in such dire need of a blow job".

    Hatch: Climaxes at every finish line

    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 43,463

    Hatch certainly suffers with hyperbole at the finish. Carlton however is like that for the entire duration of a stage which may be why it isn't as noticeable at the finish. Suggesting that Hatch is more manic / excitable than Carlton is just plain weird, the guy hyperventilates at the sight of a roundabout / rain / traffic calming / a rider getting out of the saddle to stretch his legs on a climb etc. etc. etc.

  • orraloon
    orraloon Posts: 13,235

    Carlton, what's the difference between a 90 degree bend in the road vs taking the first exit of a roundabout? Roundabouts! Traffic calming! Sketchy! Gnarly! For goodness sake!

    Hatch can get too excited, to the 'really Rob?' level but def prefer him over Wittermouth.

  • kingstongraham
    kingstongraham Posts: 28,166

    Apparently, Israel Premier Tech have keeping Riccitello in 5th on GC as "their alma mater" today.

  • hanshotfirst
    hanshotfirst Posts: 400

    Preferring Kirby over Hatch?

    Well, well, well. This comment really is one for the ages!

    😉

  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 43,463

    'Going noisy' is his new favourite phrase.

  • takethehighroad
    takethehighroad Posts: 6,822

    I just don't see a scenario where he's in the conversation for the Tour commentary.

    I watched all 3 races today, you had Jez Cox (I think) and Hannah Walker in Slovenia, Carlton and Smith in Suisse and Jose Been and Robbie McEwen in Belgium

    Of the 6 commentators, Carlton stands out as by far the worst

  • wakemalcolm
    wakemalcolm Posts: 913

    I much prefer Hatch to Carlton but that Schnitzel moment was class. Some people just take any excuse to express their disdain.

    ================================
    Cake is just weakness entering the body
  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 43,463

    I find Been a reasonably close second with her slightly condescending school teacher approach.

  • kingstongraham
    kingstongraham Posts: 28,166

    She does tend to know what she is talking about though.

  • andyp
    andyp Posts: 10,553

    Which is an accusation you could never level at Kirby...

  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 43,463

    It’s more the non-cycling stuff, it feels like she wants to show how much she knows about everything.

  • ocdupalais
    ocdupalais Posts: 4,317

    How about we all have a Forum night out at this? We can all bury the (Rob) Hatchet… for goodness sake.

    you can get tickets either through Tommy Robinson or Jim Davidson’s websites. Should be a great night out for none of the family…

  • daniel_b
    daniel_b Posts: 11,985

    No more Lloyd on any commentary or breakaway shows 😢

    Felt F70 05 (Turbo)
    Marin Palisades Trail 91 and 06
    Scott CR1 SL 12
    Cannondale Synapse Adventure 15 & 16 Di2
    Scott Foil 18
  • gethinceri
    gethinceri Posts: 1,665

    Perhaps he’s a PlaySports shareholder who needs to focus on his investment.

  • daniel_b
    daniel_b Posts: 11,985
    edited June 29

    The Jensen Healey 3000 does not exist.


    The Austin Healey 3000 does.


    Wtaf, I thought at least he might know a bit about cars from his era, but apparently not.

    Felt F70 05 (Turbo)
    Marin Palisades Trail 91 and 06
    Scott CR1 SL 12
    Cannondale Synapse Adventure 15 & 16 Di2
    Scott Foil 18
  • takethehighroad
    takethehighroad Posts: 6,822

    In the run in he identified Magnus Cort and Pascal Ackerman as being in the peloton, despite Cort being shown being dropped with about 60k to go and Ackerman having absolutely no chance of being in the company of that group.

    I assume he misidentified the number as Derek Gee, as he was having issues thinking Lutsenko was with Cav when the group composition had been shown many times

  • blazing_saddles
    blazing_saddles Posts: 22,726

    I suspect that I wasn’t the only one who switched to an ITV4/S4C combo, when the Kirby/Rowe combo took the hot seat.

    It’s one thing for viewers to stop viewing in droves, but nowt will happen until subscribers start leaving in droves. Unfortunately there aren’t enough of us in the first place.

    I feel much the same way about the BBC these days. Given their output, I really object to paying my license fee.

    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • orraloon
    orraloon Posts: 13,235

    The Wittermouth annoying me again with his 'roundabouts, roundabouts, traffic planners these days...' BS. FFS, the first UK roundabout was installed in Letchworth in 1909. So Wittermouth, do your sums, if you can...

  • stage_hunter
    stage_hunter Posts: 317

    That bit about not enough of us in the first place….Nice to see some honesty and realism around this.

  • Kauto5
    Kauto5 Posts: 90

    The worst thing about Hatch for me is how he tries to deliver a profound, poetic epilogue in the final few hundred metres every single time someone is about to roll over the line for a solo victory on a climb. Desperately clawing for an 'iconic' line for the highlights reel. It comes across so unnatural and forced - "this was his moment, he will not be denied! The slopes are disappearing behind him and his rivals put to the sword in his wake on a day he has dreamt of since he was a child...". Yawn.

    Such moments of iconic commentary are never fabricated and scripted to such an extent. Boulting is going down the same road it seems, with his own versions of clichèd elegies at the finish line.

    Hatch at his worst is infinitely better than Kirby though, who is simply unbearable at any point of any race.

  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 75,661

    Pretty sure he’s been told to do that by producers.

  • blazing_saddles
    blazing_saddles Posts: 22,726

    It’s pretty obvious now that he’s under orders to promote certain aspects of the switchover. Clearly a task that is beyond Kirby’s capabilities.

    For instance, he plugs “ad free” Discovery plus at every ad break.

    He was also singing Dani Rowe’s praises yesterday for her first stint on comms. This despite her having commentated for a number of years, covering the woman’s peloton.

    It was clearly an attempt to soften the blow of losing the guy who is, imo, the best Eurosport had to offer.

    "Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.
  • takethehighroad
    takethehighroad Posts: 6,822

    When Hatch talked about Lloyd yesterday it was almost as if he'd died.

  • stage_hunter
    stage_hunter Posts: 317

    Im almost certain that is the case. If you go back to 2019, pre the current producer being involved, he very rarely did this

  • Pross
    Pross Posts: 43,463

    Yeah, it feels like at some point he was told to be more enthusiastic ’like Carlton’ which is where the hyperbole started. I certainly don’t remember it being something he has always done. Dan was ‘guilty’ of telling it how it is when it was a boring stage which may not have gone down well and his laid back style was the polar opposite of why the producers seem to want. I assumed it was for a US audience but they don’t get the feed as far as I’m aware.

  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 75,661

    Everyone always says what a good bloke Carlton is, and I’m sure he is.


    id like to put a word in for Rob as I’ve had a beer with him and he’s a lovely guy. Really warm, fun.

  • Webboo2
    Webboo2 Posts: 1,017

    Ok it’s clear Carlton takes bollocks but listening Rob Hatch today it’s almost like he’s paid on how much word salad he can get in each sentence.

  • daniel_b
    daniel_b Posts: 11,985
    edited July 1

    I don't find Hatch's hyperbole that irritating I must be honest, but the fact people on here are stating he did not used to be like that, makes it clear to me, that people on mass being kirby fans, means that they are the reason the bosses have told hatch to change his delivery method, so it comes back onto the kirby fans imho.


    In my opinion, the stuff that hatch comes out with is probably 15% of the dirge and simply incorrect rider identifications, reading the race COMPLETELY wrong, that comes from kirby.

    I'll very happily take a few minutes of well intentioned hyperbole to miss out on all that - massive sigh of relief/moment to relax when kirby signed off yesterday with ~50k to go, realised I could actually enjoy the run in.

    I realise we are all different with our tastes, and preferences, but it boggles my mind that people would prefer the innaccuracies, tired stories, harping on about roundabouts, and Alan Partridgesisms over accurate commentary and a bit of hyperbole at the pointy end / when someone drops from the peloton / or there is an accident.

    For me, they are so far removed from each other, it's not something I am able to compute.

    Rowe is still pretty wooden imho, I'll give her time of course (Even though I've heard her for several years) as maybe she will loosen up a bit/relax into it, time will tell, 100% missing Lloyd 🤬

    Felt F70 05 (Turbo)
    Marin Palisades Trail 91 and 06
    Scott CR1 SL 12
    Cannondale Synapse Adventure 15 & 16 Di2
    Scott Foil 18