Vote for me !

daviesee

Wunnunda wrote:

Ooooh - I don't know. I'm having a hard time seeing past the tongues in cheeks ! Though I think some people have a bit too much time on their hands

Any chance of adding cat control legislation to this manifesto ?

Throw in horses and it will really kick off!

Cleat Eastwood

Well The Sun are backing him



but the Grauniad are dead against him :shock:

pinno

Bum's the word for Seanies raunchy gig dance



Rear-lly getting into it – the Croydon Crawler (standing) shows what he’s capable of when dressed in drag. After the performance, Sean expressed his delight at the fact that this gig raised the $3000 dollars he needs to go to Bangkok and get surgery to change into a boy-girl.
Asked why his saddle has that enormous cut-out, he simply said “its just too damn hot in my crotchless knickers and my dangly bits are going on auction after the trip east, I’m sooo excited”. The Wing-Wa-Restaurant consortium are believed to be first in the running, bidding on the dangly wotsits to create a unique cross between oriental and Surrey cuisine, a savoury starter of minute proportions – ‘English worm with two panda peas’ served on a bed of beenshoot paranoia.
Sinnead O'Connor the 2nd (thats what he/she shall be) is planning a homecoming trip with his Portish (Portugese/British) chaperone up Norf. This time, she vows to make it out of the car park.
Join her growing fan club - sinneadoconnorflipflop.org.uk

Meanwhile, in the latest edition of the Socialist Republic of Scouseland:

Liverpool is twinned with Hell, Croydon and Narnia. It is, in some ways, like the mafia - once you are in there is no way out.

A Liverpudlian Druid ritual lead by Cleat Eastwood in full swing:
Of course in actual fact, no scousers look or sound like this- real ones have peg-legs.

Der pewl, like de 'amlet o' Manchesti 'as a dead small population due ter de north-south divide dat runs across England, bisect'n de province o' Birmingham. De only way ter reach de north is by vent'n through Wales, a feat only achieved by seventeun people in de last 372 years. Like 90% o' uvver Northerners, Liverpudlians ay druids. Every third wensdee, de terwn sacrifices a young "lass" ter baal.

De capital o' der pewl is Cantril Farm which is owned by a Nigerian Scotsman called Black Angus.

It should be remembered dat de people o' der pewl ay dead very sensitive little souls, and dat anyone oo contributes ter deez pages, er evun squeaks out a snigger whilst read'n dem, will be expected ter crawl ed their bare elastic bands and knees ter de city and issue a public apology fe dar'n ter question their kip o' perfection...

Cleat can often be seen pedalling away on his trike from the poundland shop in Renshaw Street and for some inexplicable reason, always chooses the Cains Brewery tour route home. Catch him if you can - easy to spot: the only smoke eminating from anywhere in Liverpool since Mrs T had a bash at the werkin classes and British Industry.