Seemingly trivial things that annoy you

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  • veterangaz
    veterangaz Posts: 79
    Chavs. Will own up, was in poundland the other day (some great household DIY tools here), and was behind a huge women in some form of leopard skin lycra and a 14 year old daughter in a similar outfit, both overdosed on fake tan and their huge bellies hanging out. Anyway, they went round the store opening up loads of items, throwing the ripped boxes on the floor before slinging the item back on the shelf once decided they didn't want it. Seriously, these people are beyond help should be shipped off somewhere out of sight and denied benefits until they learn to talk correctly.
  • Peddle Up!
    Peddle Up! Posts: 2,040
    The way everything is claimed to be getting better as an election approaches. Actually not so trivial. :?
    Purveyor of "up" :)
  • capt_slog
    capt_slog Posts: 3,974
    Women approaching the carpark barrier at work in the morning.
    They drive forward at half a mile an hour for the last 50m, get to the barrier, then start looking for their handbags for the swipe card to get in, the handbag tends to be in the back seat. After a search through the handbag they then remember the card is on the lanyard around their neck. They fish the card out from under coats and cardigans and start looking for the button that winds down the window. Window down, they then discover that the lanyard actually has to come off their neck as it's not long enough to reach. They then find that their arms are not long enough either, because they've stopped too far from the machine. They try to open the door and get out of the car at this point, but they can't because they are just too close for that, so they reverse and have another go. :evil:

    Capt Slog approaches the barrier.

    Window is already down and the card is held between the teeth. As the barrier machine nears, the card held out of the window in one fluid motion where it glances across the face of the reader. The barrier begins to raise without the car even stopping.

    That's how it's done ladies. You're supposed to be able to 'multitask', learn this one.


    The older I get, the better I was.

  • arran77
    arran77 Posts: 9,260
    paultheparaglider wrote:
    I tried that once, it was boring the dead.

    FTFY
    "Arran, you are like the Tony Benn of smut. You have never diluted your depravity and always stand by your beliefs. You have my respect sir and your wife my pity" :lol:

    seanoconn
  • oblongomaculatus
    oblongomaculatus Posts: 616
    Capt Slog wrote:
    Women approaching the carpark barrier at work in the morning.
    They drive forward at half a mile an hour for the last 50m, get to the barrier, then start looking for their handbags for the swipe card to get in, the handbag tends to be in the back seat. After a search through the handbag they then remember the card is on the lanyard around their neck. They fish the card out from under coats and cardigans and start looking for the button that winds down the window. Window down, they then discover that the lanyard actually has to come off their neck as it's not long enough to reach. They then find that their arms are not long enough either, because they've stopped too far from the machine. They try to open the door and get out of the car at this point, but they can't because they are just too close for that, so they reverse and have another go. :evil:

    Capt Slog approaches the barrier.

    Window is already down and the card is held between the teeth. As the barrier machine nears, the card held out of the window in one fluid motion where it glances across the face of the reader. The barrier begins to raise without the car even stopping.

    That's how it's done ladies. You're supposed to be able to 'multitask', learn this one.

    I don't drive, yet, weirdly, this situation strikes a chord with me...
  • verylonglegs
    verylonglegs Posts: 4,023
    Capt Slog wrote:

    That's how it's done ladies. You're supposed to be able to 'multitask', learn this one.

    Multitasking doesn't really exist, it just means doing 3-4 jobs badly instead of doing one really well.

    My latest trivial annoyance is gel soaps that disappear off your hands and down the plug hole at even the slightest application of water making getting a lather nigh on impossible. Don't they test these products? :evil:
  • graham.
    graham. Posts: 862
    "I'm likeing"...No! "You like"!
    "You do the math"...No! "You do the maths"! (and don't tell me what to do!)
    People who use too many exclamation marks!
    My Flickr Pics
  • smoggysteve
    smoggysteve Posts: 2,909
    Anyone seen thw Ford Fiesta ad with the function that allows you to have text messages read to you by the car?

    1. Who uses text messages anymore?

    2. hw ds it gt txt spk? wtf ws the thnkng thr?
  • bompington
    bompington Posts: 7,674
    People who interpret a slight downward trend (texts down about 10% from their 2012 peak) as "no-one does that anymore"
  • CiB
    CiB Posts: 6,098
    SmoggySteve wrote:
    2. hw ds it gt txt spk? wtf ws the thnkng thr?
    The BT text-to-speech engine that drives the completely unknown service that reads out txt msgs sent to a landline handles txt spk admirably, and that's years old. I'd hope a 2014 Fiasco can do better than what was a Windows Server 2003 box + associated service tbh. :)
  • CiB
    CiB Posts: 6,098
    Annoying - threads with <name> + RIP in honour of anyone who's died. Just the name will do fine thanks.
  • markhewitt1978
    markhewitt1978 Posts: 7,614
    verylonglegs wrote:
    Capt Slog wrote:

    That's how it's done ladies. You're supposed to be able to 'multitask', learn this one.

    Multitasking doesn't really exist, it just means doing 3-4 jobs badly instead of doing one really well.

    Indeed this is a good example of a single task done well, Capt Slog has analysed the motions required and worked out the most efficient way.
  • Peddle Up!
    Peddle Up! Posts: 2,040
    CiB wrote:
    Annoying - threads with <name> + RIP in honour of anyone who's died. Just the name will do fine thanks.

    Bit harsh. Nothing wrong with showing some respect.
    Purveyor of "up" :)
  • smoggysteve
    smoggysteve Posts: 2,909
    bompington wrote:
    People who interpret a slight downward trend (texts down about 10% from their 2012 peak) as "no-one does that anymore"

    Facebook messenger, whatsapp, snapchat, twitter etc etc. think the sms numbers are only going to get worse.
  • Peddle Up!
    Peddle Up! Posts: 2,040
    "Plug sockets". They're SOCKETS! :roll:
    Purveyor of "up" :)
  • VmanF3
    VmanF3 Posts: 240
    Fat people, especially fat mums at my kids school who wear leggings, the fabric of which is so pushed to the limits of 'stretch' that they look like they're wearing tights. Sad thing is, the majority of them have fat kids too.

    Come to think of it, when I was at primary school in the late 70's, there was one fat kid, seriously just one - and even he wasn't massive. Same at the next school actually, only a few fatties out of 900 kids and not a single master was obese. Oh how times change!
    Big Red, Blue, Pete, Bill & Doug
  • markhewitt1978
    markhewitt1978 Posts: 7,614
    SmoggySteve wrote:
    bompington wrote:
    People who interpret a slight downward trend (texts down about 10% from their 2012 peak) as "no-one does that anymore"

    Same with any trends.

    e.g. Your chances of getting cancel are (made up number) 1 in 10,000.
    But if you eat this type of food your chances are 3 in 10,000

    TRIPLES RISK OF CANCER is thus the headline - and yet the risk was a very small risk and it's still a very small risk.

    And don't get me started on "fastest growing"..
  • MisterMuncher
    MisterMuncher Posts: 1,302
    Newspaper science coverage is pretty much a joke. They vacillate between relative and absolute values with no real regard for magnitude simply to make a better headline.
  • wannabecyclist
    wannabecyclist Posts: 149
    The fact that no incredible experiences are likely to happen in our lifetime. I was born in the 80's so no moon landing for me. Would love to live till I was 300 so I could witness us finding life on another planet or manage to reproduce dinosaurs. All I have to look forward to over the remaining 60 years is over crowding and over development.
  • VmanF3
    VmanF3 Posts: 240
    wannabecyclist wrote:
    The fact that no incredible experiences are likely to happen in our lifetime. I was born in the 80's so no moon landing for me. Would love to live till I was 300 so I could witness us finding life on another planet or manage to reproduce dinosaurs. All I have to look forward to over the remaining 60 years is over crowding and over development.


    The Internet, 9/11(not good, but still a momentous event), two gulf wars, a Brit winning Wimbledon, London Olympics, First British TDF winner, Felix Baum..... free fall from the edge of space, the space shuttles first and last, mobile comms proliferation, tech boom (has me thinking whatever next), space tourism very likely to happen, etc., etc... Depends on what you call incredible really...
    Big Red, Blue, Pete, Bill & Doug
  • capt_slog
    capt_slog Posts: 3,974
    VmanF3 wrote:
    wannabecyclist wrote:
    The fact that no incredible experiences are likely to happen in our lifetime. I was born in the 80's so no moon landing for me. Would love to live till I was 300 so I could witness us finding life on another planet or manage to reproduce dinosaurs. All I have to look forward to over the remaining 60 years is over crowding and over development.


    The Internet, 9/11(not good, but still a momentous event), two gulf wars, a Brit winning Wimbledon, London Olympics, First British TDF winner, Felix Baum..... free fall from the edge of space, the space shuttles first and last, mobile comms proliferation, tech boom (has me thinking whatever next), space tourism very likely to happen, etc., etc... Depends on what you call incredible really...

    Are you serious? That's about as momentous as Leona Lewis winning X-factor.


    The older I get, the better I was.

  • VmanF3
    VmanF3 Posts: 240
    People going on a 'journey' for absolutely everything. It's not a frigging 'journey'! It's an experience at best, but for most it's just a function of living.

    I had an amazing weight loss 'journey'.
    The journey to buying this house was tough...
    Finding out about my family tree has been a fantastic journey...

    Sod off with the bloody journey!
    Big Red, Blue, Pete, Bill & Doug
  • team47b
    team47b Posts: 6,425
    People who bang on about money all the time like it is far more important than addressing the large hole in their lives.
    my isetta is a 300cc bike
  • owenlars
    owenlars Posts: 719
    People who use "Train Station" for Railway Station and "Bad Weather Conditions" for Bad Weather and "Envision" for Envisage and.......................and........and............ :evil:
  • mr_goo
    mr_goo Posts: 3,770
    Round Robin Letters, usually sent out with Christmas cards.
    Got a colleague who does this every year, explaining how well he is trading with stocks and shares and what he spends his profits on. FFS! We don't need to know.
    Always be yourself, unless you can be Aaron Rodgers....Then always be Aaron Rodgers.
  • markhewitt1978
    markhewitt1978 Posts: 7,614
    VmanF3 wrote:
    People going on a 'journey' for absolutely everything. It's not a frigging 'journey'! It's an experience at best, but for most it's just a function of living.

    I had an amazing weight loss 'journey'.
    The journey to buying this house was tough...
    Finding out about my family tree has been a fantastic journey...

    Sod off with the bloody journey!

    Yes and factual programmes too can't just present the facts with interviews and demonstrations etc, they have to make a celebrity out of the presenter who goes on a journey of discovery, every single time.
  • capt_slog
    capt_slog Posts: 3,974
    The "mega comma". This is used in every master-dancing-celebrity-x-chef-factor-on-ice, where they say,

    "..and the winner is ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Ethel".

    It's just another way of packing ten minutes of entertainment into and hour of TV.


    The older I get, the better I was.

  • oblongomaculatus
    oblongomaculatus Posts: 616
    owenlars wrote:
    People who use "Train Station" for Railway Station

    I was once asked the way to the "railroad station" in Cambridge by an American tourist, a phrase I'd previously only heard in Westerns. Not annoying at all, though, it kept me amused all day.
  • ballysmate
    ballysmate Posts: 15,996
    owenlars wrote:
    People who use "Train Station" for Railway Station and "Bad Weather Conditions" for Bad Weather and "Envision" for Envisage and.......................and........and............ :evil:


    We use bus station, so why is train station so annoying?
    Just askin'.
  • team47b
    team47b Posts: 6,425
    A fire station is not, generally, where the fire is so it is not a train station but a railway station, for trains.

    Do you mean a bus terminus?
    my isetta is a 300cc bike

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