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I applied to be a civil enforcement officer will I get shot?

willhubwillhub Posts: 821
edited July 2012 in The bottom bracket
They apparently get assaulted all the time and have to stand in pissing rain, but they're paid £7.05 an hour.
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  • sungodsungod Posts: 13,781
    don't know, but i did just discover that if you resurrect the oldest thread in the forum your post gets deleted and the thread goes back to the bottom of the pile

    now i'm wondering, if i do it again will i get shot?
    my bike - faster than god's and twice as shiny
  • finchyfinchy Posts: 6,686
    In Manchester, probably yes.
  • verylonglegsverylonglegs Posts: 3,641
    To be fair anyone with such an undefinable job title deserves to be shot. What the fark does that entail? *cocks pistol and aims*
  • willhubwillhub Posts: 821
    Traffic warden.
  • pinnopinno Posts: 42,762
    "Right Mr Willhub, your first assignment as a CivEnFOff is in moss side, we would like you to keep an eye on those boystrous lads."
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • willhubwillhub Posts: 821
    I was talking to one of the wardens and he said he got assaulted the other day, and not long after he said that, he heard over the radio one of the woman traffic wardens just got held up against a wall by some guy that took a disliking to the ticket on his car.
  • napoleondnapoleond Posts: 5,983
    Yep. They get [email protected] all the time.
    Twitter - @NapD
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  • pinnopinno Posts: 42,762
    willhub wrote:
    I was talking to one of the wardens and he said he got assaulted the other day, and not long after he said that, he heard over the radio one of the woman traffic wardens just got held up against a wall by some guy that took a disliking to the ticket on his car.

    Seems to me:

    A) You're having doubts based on the knowledge you had beforehand which means
    B) You had no intention of being a CivEnFOff which means
    C) Your asking for bad advice seen as this post was submitted simply because of inexorable frustration and boredom.

    Most of us just spank our monkeys in such a situation, but you no, you have to test the response after making the conclusion that you aint gonna be one. As a result, I have this to say to you:

    Go for it Willhub, it will prove to be such a rewarding and worthwhile thing to do and a career for life.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • team47bteam47b Posts: 6,424
    MTFU they are only bullets and you do get £7 which is a lot of Mars bars.
    my isetta is a 300cc bike
  • jmcc500jmcc500 Posts: 33
    Do it, but never issue a ticket. I guess they'll sack you eventually, but you won't get beaten up, you get to prove that they ticket to make money, and you get paid £7.05ph in the meantime.
  • Wirral_paulWirral_paul Posts: 2,476
    You'll get less abuse as a Traffic Warden than you would from the staff in a Job Centre - have you been in one of those places recently?

    Lesser of two evils to be a CivEnfOff than have to be abused by Job Centre staff really :D
  • Frank the tankFrank the tank Posts: 6,553
    Be a n A&E nurse Statistics (yeah I know) say on average they're assaulted more times than police officers, and I bet it's more than £7/hour Will and you'll be indoors. :D
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • Smokin JoeSmokin Joe Posts: 2,706
    Go for it.

    Women love a man in uniform.
  • rolf_frolf_f Posts: 16,015
    I suppose it will help you develop a thick skin from all the anger you'll get from the special needs folk blaming you for the fact that they are too moronic to work out how to park legally.......
    Faster than a tent.......
  • capt_slogcapt_slog Posts: 3,603
    Rolf F wrote:
    I suppose it will help you develop a thick skin from all the anger you'll get from the special needs folk blaming you for the fact that they are too moronic to work out how to park legally.......

    +1

    If it wasn't so much aggro I would love a job giving tickets to cash-point-cripples.


    The older I get, the better I was.

  • mudcow007mudcow007 Posts: 3,861
    You'll get less abuse as a Traffic Warden than you would from the staff in a Job Centre - have you been in one of those places recently?

    Lesser of two evils to be a CivEnfOff than have to be abused by Job Centre staff really :D

    one of my mates is a security guard in a job center, he is also a doorman in Liverpool city center. He said he gets more trouble on his day job then being a bouncer!!!
    Keeping it classy since '83
  • MonkeypumpMonkeypump Posts: 1,528
    £7.05/hr isn't that much, but don't they get commission too? Or is that a myth?
  • Redhog14Redhog14 Posts: 1,377
    WTF is a CiveOff anyway?
  • willhubwillhub Posts: 821
    Won't be getting that job then.

    Got an email linking me to a personality questionnaire, the questionnaire does not seem to be working. I try emailing them on plenty of different emails and all fail to be delivered, some no reason, others due to "security policies", I try contacting head office in London on an 0844 number and get nothing. Great, I'd get more information out of a brick wall.
  • team47bteam47b Posts: 6,424
    willhub wrote:
    Got an email linking me to a personality questionnaire, the questionnaire does not seem to be working.

    Nice one :D

    Oh, that was a joke wasn't it?
    my isetta is a 300cc bike
  • MattC59MattC59 Posts: 5,408
    Some ar*e hole gave me a ticket today as I was walking to the ticket machine to get a new ticket !!!!!

    I could have f*cking swung for him. Still, I got his details and have two parking tickets, so shall be appealing.
    Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed.
    Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved
  • AnonymousAnonymous Posts: 79,678
    willhub wrote:
    Won't be getting that job then.

    Got an email linking me to a personality questionnaire, the questionnaire does not seem to be working. I try emailing them on plenty of different emails and all fail to be delivered, some no reason, others due to "security policies", I try contacting head office in London on an 0844 number and get nothing. Great, I'd get more information out of a brick wall.


    Lack of personality ?

    Heehee.
  • willhubwillhub Posts: 821
    Passed the personality questionnaire and the maths/english test, waiting to hear if I get an offer, if I do, I have to do a 5 day training course thing in August, then take a test at the end of it, if I get over 75% I get the job, if I get 65-75% then I possibly get the opportunity to resit. It's like £7.09 an hour and 40 hours a week walking up to 10 miles per day.
  • davieseedaviesee Posts: 6,386
    willhub wrote:
    Passed the personality questionnaire and the maths/english test, waiting to hear if I get an offer, if I do, I have to do a 5 day training course thing in August, then take a test at the end of it, if I get over 75% I get the job, if I get 65-75% then I possibly get the opportunity to resit. It's like £7.09 an hour and 40 hours a week walking up to 10 miles per day.
    You work (hard?) at Uni to get your degree and come out to do a job you could have walked into straight from school for £14,747.20 per year.
    Tell me you are still looking elsewhere. Please?
    None of the above should be taken seriously, and certainly not personally.
  • pinnopinno Posts: 42,762
    Is this thread still going ?!! Guess I can park in certain parts of Manchester and not get a ticket, my registration no. is... :D
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • willhubwillhub Posts: 821
    daviesee wrote:
    willhub wrote:
    Passed the personality questionnaire and the maths/english test, waiting to hear if I get an offer, if I do, I have to do a 5 day training course thing in August, then take a test at the end of it, if I get over 75% I get the job, if I get 65-75% then I possibly get the opportunity to resit. It's like £7.09 an hour and 40 hours a week walking up to 10 miles per day.
    You work (hard?) at Uni to get your degree and come out to do a job you could have walked into straight from school for £14,747.20 per year.
    Tell me you are still looking elsewhere. Please?

    What do you expect me to do? Get a job that my degree would have being useful for that requires 1 year experience in an IT role that I don't have?
  • asquitheaasquithea Posts: 145
    willhub wrote:
    What do you expect me to do? Get a job that my degree would have being useful for that requires 1 year experience in an IT role that I don't have?

    Well... yeah. Pity you didn't do an industrial placement, 'cause that pretty much sorts that problem.

    I do quite a lot of interviewing for new grads, mostly into software development. It's not unusual for someone with reasonable academic qualifications to be accepted even if they don't have any relevant experience, as long there's a degree (which you have), and enthusiasm (which you can fake), and some interest/knowledge about the field (which you can research the day before the interview).

    A 2:1 is plenty (no-one cares about the exact mark), but your specific degree & uni are slightly less attractive - so play up team work, project management, and other marketable skills from the course.

    Learn about the companies you're applying to. What products do they have? What tech do they use? Who are their competitors? What's their business model? Etc. Better yet, start studying the tech. You can be learning Java, C# or Python etc while you're applying for jobs - trust me, this comes across quite well at interview.

    Assuming you are at all interested in IT, the worst possible thing you could do would be to settle for an irrelevant occupation now - you'll miss your best shot at a good entry-level position. By all means take something to earn some cash, but only for a few months as a stop-gap.

    Just IMHO; but I do make hiring decisions for grads, and this stuff counts.
  • Kieran_BurnsKieran_Burns Posts: 9,757
    asquithea wrote:
    willhub wrote:
    What do you expect me to do? Get a job that my degree would have being useful for that requires 1 year experience in an IT role that I don't have?

    Well... yeah. Pity you didn't do an industrial placement, 'cause that pretty much sorts that problem.

    I do quite a lot of interviewing for new grads, mostly into software development. It's not unusual for someone with reasonable academic qualifications to be accepted even if they don't have any relevant experience, as long there's a degree (which you have), and enthusiasm (which you can fake), and some interest/knowledge about the field (which you can research the day before the interview).

    A 2:1 is plenty (no-one cares about the exact mark), but your specific degree & uni are slightly less attractive - so play up team work, project management, and other marketable skills from the course.

    Learn about the companies you're applying to. What products do they have? What tech do they use? Who are their competitors? What's their business model? Etc. Better yet, start studying the tech. You can be learning Java, C# or Python etc while you're applying for jobs - trust me, this comes across quite well at interview.

    Assuming you are at all interested in IT, the worst possible thing you could do would be to settle for an irrelevant occupation now - you'll miss your best shot at a good entry-level position. By all means take something to earn some cash, but only for a few months as a stop-gap.

    Just IMHO; but I do make hiring decisions for grads, and this stuff counts.

    Gawd £14K a year as a post-grad?

    My 1st salary was £11,270 (I always remember that!) when I graduated 20 odd years ago (Dear God), but then I got the other advantage of a placement year... my new boss was a guy I worked with in my placement year. He basically phoned me up and asked me to start as soon as possible.
    Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
    2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
    2011 Trek Madone 4.5
    2012 Felt F65X
    Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter
  • asquitheaasquithea Posts: 145
    Starting salary for a grad at my company (Guildford area) is ~ £28k. And that's not particularly competitive.
  • davieseedaviesee Posts: 6,386
    willhub wrote:
    What do you expect me to do? Get a job that my degree would have being useful for that requires 1 year experience in an IT role that I don't have?
    In one of your previous threads about looking for work I sent you a link to a site that had dozens of IT graduate jobs in the Manchester area, all paying much more. I found that site in less than 10 seconds.
    To be brutally honest, if you can't master Google, or be bothered to look then maybe you have found your level.
    None of the above should be taken seriously, and certainly not personally.
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