Random useful tips

CyclingBantam

This could work or it could be a dead duck. So, a thread to post your random tips in... About absolutely anything:

To cure cold feet, run them under cold water for 30 seconds. 5 mins later they will be toasty warm as all the blood rushes there to warm them up!

skinarelli

I find popping the heating on and resting my feet on the radiator to be a far more pleasurable experience.

Blue Meanie

Line your tyres' labels up with the valve stem, it makes finding the valve easier when you pump it up.

nicklouse

Blue Meanie wrote:

Line your tyres' labels up with the valve stem, it makes finding the valve easier when you pump it up.

makes finding the "P" fairy easier as well.

clarkey cat

CREATE instant designer stubble by sucking a magnet and dipping your chin into a bowl of iron filings.

clarkey cat

CLIMB on to your neighbour's roof and dangle a fish on a bit of string in front of his windows. He'll think his house is underwater.

clarkey cat

AVOID parking tickets by leaving your windscreen wipers turned to "fast wipe" whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

clarkey cat

INVITED by vegetarians for dinner? As you'd no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours – ask for a nice steak.

Kieran_Burns

This is all very childish.

I feel I should add a vital tip that is useful for this time of year:

Don't eat yellow snow.

marchant

Disposable tourniquets make excellent replacement shims for lights etc, particularly as you can wind on only as much as you need, rather than using the thin/medium/thick ones you get when you buy lights. You can probably use them as rim tape or even as a tyre boot too, in a pinch. But I haven't had to try that yet.

davis

Make shop-bought coleslaw go further by simply adding some mayonnaise, sliced carrots and cabbage.

bompington

Kieran_Burns wrote:

This is all very childish.

I feel I should add a vital tip that is useful for this time of year:

Don't eat yellow snow.

Very worrying across the river:

Dunfermline Press wrote:

The MET Office has issued a yellow snow warning for Fife

suzyb

Reading this thread I forgot it was only Tuesday. It feels like a Friday thread

Wooliferkins

Never wipe your @##e with a broken bottle.

ToeKnee

It sups fuel?

bails87

http://twitter.com/#!/twoptwips

Choosing a gift for a friend from Norfolk? Always buy mittens and not gloves to prevent one of those 'awkward moments'

Kieran_Burns

bompington wrote:

Kieran_Burns wrote:

This is all very childish.

I feel I should add a vital tip that is useful for this time of year:

Don't eat yellow snow.

Very worrying across the river:

Dunfermline Press wrote:

The MET Office has issued a yellow snow warning for Fife

I think they mean it will be p*ssing it down....

KonaMike

Dont stand up in a Canoe .

rick_chasey

Do not try to tap-steer whilst coxing on the Cam, unless on the Reach, despite what any 'expert' rower may say.

Also, when racing towards the railway bridge, it is best to stick as close to the bowside (right) bank as you can whilst steering a straight line to keep sheltered from the wind, and to avoid the current. This is more important in winter, when the current and wind is stronger.

mudcow007

anorexics - When your knees become fatter than your legs, start eating cakes again

mudcow007

cheap Christmas present - An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator

Gussio

Don't do drugs.

Kieran_Burns

Gussio wrote:

Don't do drugs.

drugs are bad

bails87

Unless you want to win the TDF.....

Gussio

Alledgedly

Kieran_Burns

Don't start a thread titled "Random useful tips" and expect serious replies.

EKE_38BPM

Kieran_Burns wrote:

Gussio wrote:

Don't do drugs.

drugs are bad

I watched a film last night called Walk Hard. It was a spoof of the life of a guitarist/singer called Dewey Cox ranging from him cuting his brother in half with a machete, discovering he could play the guitar, sing the blues, sing rock 'n' roll, touring, getting married, having kids, discovering drugs, meditation retreats in India, rehab etc.
It was surprisingly funny and I'd recommend it.

Anyway, this is the scene when he is first introduced to weed by a band member

notsoblue

EKE_38BPM wrote:

Kieran_Burns wrote:

Gussio wrote:

Don't do drugs.

drugs are bad

I watched a film last night called Walk Hard. It was a spoof of the life of a guitarist/singer called Dewey Cox ranging from him cuting his brother in half with a machete, discovering he could play the guitar, sing the blues, sing rock 'n' roll, touring, getting married, having kids, discovering drugs, meditation retreats in India, rehab etc.
It was surprisingly funny and I'd recommend it.

Anyway, this is the scene when he is first introduced to weed by a band member

Hah! "If boners last for more than 4 hours, call more ladies"

keyser__soze

Rick Chasey wrote:

...

Trust Tiny Tim to lower the tone of this thread by harping on about cox...

clarkey cat

When clearing up broken glass, use a piece of cheap white bread to mop up the affected area after sweeping. The moist bread will pick up the pieces that you can't sweep and your broom misses.

CyclingBantam

Kieran_Burns wrote:

Don't start a thread titled "Random useful tips" and expect serious replies.

To be honest, I wasn't expecting much seriousness.

Don't state the bleedin obvious on internet forums...