Bacons - whats your poison?

DF33

Red or brown?

Are you a 'don't mention ze var' Heinz tomato splasher or a pomp and ceremony duck house loving Houses of Parliament brown dripper on your bacon sarnies? or maybe your a naturist loving as it comes, so to speak?

Also, for that PERFECT weekend lush fest, is it cheap white sliced, healthy brown, or a breadcake, balm, roll type thingy? Toasted? Raw? Buttered? plain?

Black pepper?

Does it have to have vegitation to be perfect? fresh tomato or grilled? tinned tomato or just a little juice? mushroom between the sheets maybe?

Perhaps your a well travelled Stylee and go for the classic BLT?

And the Bacons, the most important bit - smoked or unsmoked? cheap as Bet Lynch or quality BBC2 rashers? back, middle or streaky as an Essex girls tan?

Perhaps a fettish, some Lea and Perrins sprinkled on?

On that day off, how do you want your perfect bacon sarnie?

Gazlar

These options are merely variations on a theme dear boy, if it's hot and bacon and in brad it's good. itsike asking whats the best kind of woman?As long asits female and not past it's sell by date its also good

mak3m

+1


But brown everytime

cat_with_no_tail

Gazlar wrote:

These options are merely variations on a theme dear boy, if it's hot and bacon and in brad it's good. itsike asking whats the best kind of woman?As long asits female and not past it's sell by date its also good

You love it in brad, don't you sailor.

Back to the subject of bacons anyway.

Unsmoked, thick, lightly done, large fresh bread roll, butter. Nothing else.

Actually exactly what I just had

The Northern Monkey

OOO, I prefer smoked, crispy, barm, butter and brown sauce.. Perfect.

cat_with_no_tail

The Northern Monkey wrote:

OOO, I prefer smoked, crispy, barm, butter and brown sauce.. Perfect.

To be fair though, you're wrong!

DF33

Gazlar, Gazlar Gazlar....

Are you still riding that old Halfords £99 scaff bike? Or something a leeetle more sweetish like? Noticed the difference?

Dare to be different, try binning the back of the market 3 kilo for a fiver rancid pack and maybe try the Tesco basics for a treat

[stands back with helmet on waiting for the incoming ]

TheNorthernTrain

bacon (either crispy or lightly done, any variety), bread of any description and some greasy spoons style TK, or heinz if you're feeling lavish!

Job done!

thekickingmule

I really don't mind how I eat a bacon butty. Crispy or not, red or brown sauce, any kind of bread is good, smoked or unsmoked.

I don't even mind how the pig lived. Whether it was fed on truffles, bathed in the finest mud and put to bed every night from it's 12 acre pen, or left in a sty with 12 other pigs, fed dead bodies and rogered up the wrong'un by a back-door-bashing-bacon-buggerer, It's still bacon at the end of the day, just cook it a little longer if it's the latter.

If it's in front of me, I will eat it.

Gazlar

DF33 wrote:

Gazlar, Gazlar Gazlar....

Are you still riding that old Halfords £99 scaff bike? Or something a leeetle more sweetish like? Noticed the difference?

Dare to be different, try binning the back of the market 3 kilo for a fiver rancid pack and maybe try the Tesco basics for a treat

[stands back with helmet on waiting for the incoming ]

Oh dear, such naivety.

Your metaphor of bikes, like mine of sexual encounters can be likened to bacon, what I mean is why limit yourself and search for perfection when you can have what you feel like at that given moment. Any time I have bacon, biking or sex is a good time (although I've never sobbed uncontrollably during bacon) but you can have all of them in a way that suits the situation.
Sometimes I feel like bacon on crusty white with bbq sauce, sometimes on a brown bap, gerty sometimes I go crazy and have it on a baguette with an egg. Likewise if I'm cycling through Amsterdam I find it most enjoyable on a city bike, but I'd find that less enjoyable on the monkey trail compared with a full susser. And sometimes you want meaningful sex with a beloved partner, sometimes being noshed off by a one legged thai hooker is more fun, sometimes youre more than happy to be jacked off by a drunk middle aged family fdiend you've always, known as "Auntie Jean" but is now, insisting you call her Mrs Belvedier, at the back of the Aldi next to the Social Club her daughters wedding reception is being held at. These are just a few vague, everyday examples.

Essentially what i'm saying is that enjoy all your options

tom_howard

That be mighty profound there sir!

As many rashers as poss, crispy, raw bread, butter. That is all. Maybe a bit of red if there's some in.

VWsurfbum

thick cut rindless smoked bacon on a base of philidelphia on a fresh tiger roll *drools*

mak3m

I want Auntie Jeans number :twisted:

ddraver

Unsmoked, quality bacon (not really got a choice here though ) in a baguette with some strong mature cheddar, dip of mayonaise and dip of ketchup

Cheese and onion crisps

Brown sauce is for Sausages, not for bacons!

Gazlar

mak3m wrote:

I want Auntie Jeans number :twisted:

its avaialble in most phone boxes in the Tipton area

Gazlar

Oh if i'm going to suggest any bacon recipe, its not necesarily the best, but I had it earlier in the week and its nice, Onion bagel with smoked streaky bacon, cooked until crisp,with emmenthal, poached egg chives and a thin black pudding fritter

supersonic

WIth cheese.

getonyourbike

This thread was enough to send me over the edge. I'm eating a couple of nice bacon sandwiches. For me it's unsmoked, slightly crispy with lots of ketchup, the type of bread doesn't really bother me.

angry_bird

Unsmoked.
Little bit crispy.
In a roll, or possibly baguette, depending on the mood. No butter.
Maybe a tiny bit of ketchup, if not then fried tomato.
Heavens.

sheepsteeth

soft bacon, only just cooked. Fat left on.

white bread, no butter

tomato sauce (im not bothered if it is heinz or lidl or anything in betwen, it all tastes the same)

make one, make another then eat them both.

Sideways

bwfc4eva868

Crispy round the edge.

White Bread or Toasted white bread with Lurpak Butter

Tomato sauce.

Although I do prefer a Sausage Barm really

angry_bird

bwfc4eva868 wrote:

I do prefer a Sausage Barm really

:shock:

Sounds like you might have some sort of learning/mental/retardness disability there... either that or you prefer it becaue you are in fact gay, same thing really. In which case you should talk to Josh.

disclaimer: being gay isn't a disability, that's harsh on disabled people... jokes...

cat_with_no_tail

lets face it. All real men are well aware of the fact that the only way to eat sausages (or any obvious shaped food) is with a knife and fork.

Antything else and you are sending a clear message that you are infact an uphill gardener.

sheepsteeth

ive always said tht people who eat bananas only eat them because they like the shape

Raymondavalon

I tend no to eat too much of that type of food. Last night I did purchase some thick, smoked bacons and had them on my home cooked burgers with some melted mature cheddar between them. That is about the only time I'll eat bacon

Stevo_666

Bit of a purist, me: well done bacon, white bread, nothing else (no sauce, not even butter). It's the way it should be.

IcarusGreen

Fresh Warbertons toast bread with real butter, fry the smoked bacon with no fat until just cooked with a dab of heinze tomato ketchup!

Adding a couple of slices of fried haloumi cheese tastes good as well.

thekickingmule

VWsurfbum wrote:

thick cut rindless smoked bacon on a base of paedophilia on a fresh tiger roll *drools*

You sicken me, sir!

bluechair84

Triple decker is the only way forward here really. Until someone invents the quad-decker bacon sarnie... but my God humanity isn't ready for such glory yet.

mak3m

sheepsteeth wrote:

ive always said tht people who eat bananas only eat them because they like the shape

i always sub consiously slap the back of my head when going down *cough* i mean eating a banana

should i be concerned

bwfc4eva868

Angry Bird wrote:

bwfc4eva868 wrote:

I do prefer a Sausage Barm really

:shock:

Sounds like you might have some sort of learning/mental/retardness disability there... either that or you prefer it becaue you are in fact gay, same thing really. In which case you should talk to Josh.

disclaimer: being gay isn't a disability, that's harsh on disabled people... jokes...

Not really just think it tastes nicer than bacon. Bread or eaten with a knife and for.