Beards - what is the point

Wallace1492

I know a lot of commuters favour the facial hair, but why? I really see no point in it at all. Unless you are just being lazy, or it is "Movember"

I occassionaly have some stubble, but because I have been lazy or been away camping or the like.

But why oh why have a full on beard?
It's dirty, unkempt, probably smelly, full of dribble and old food, and must get pretty bad covered in sweat.... and as my dear departed Father always said, "Never trust a man with a beard!"

So, what is the point.....????

jonny_trousers

Nerd chic or true nerdism. There's a very fine line between the two.

EKE_38BPM

Beardies are attempting to grow a balaclava.

UndercoverElephant

Roald Dahl wrote:

As you know, an ordinary unhairy face like yours or mine simply gets a bit smudgy if it is not washed often enough, and there's nothing so awful about that. But a hairy face is a very different matter. Things cling to hairs, especially food. Things like gravy go right in
among the hairs and stay there. You and I can wipe our smooth faces with a flannel and we quickly look more or less all right again, but the hairy man cannot do that.

We can also, if we are careful, eat our meals without spreading food all over our faces. But not so the hairy man. Watch carefully next time you see a hairy man eating his lunch and you will notice that even if he opens his mouth very wide, it is impossible for him to get a spoonful of beef-stew or ice-cream and chocolate sauce into it without leaving some of it on the hairs.

Mr Twit didn't even bother to open his mouth wide when he ate. As a result (and because he never washed) there were always hundreds of bits of old breakfasts and lunches and suppers sticking to the hairs around his face. They weren't big bits, mind you, because he used to wipe those off with the back of his hand or on his sleeve while he was eating. But if you looked closely (not that you'd ever want to) you would see tiny little specks of dried-up scrambled eggs stuck to the hairs, and spinach and tomato ketchup and fish fingers and minced chicken livers and all the other disgusting things Mr Twit liked to eat.

If you looked closer still (hold your noses, ladies and gentlemen), if you peered deep into the moustachy bristles sticking out over his upper lip, you would probably see much larger objects that had escaped the wipe of his hand, things that had been there for months and months, like a piece of maggoty green cheese or a mouldy old cornflake or even the slimy tail of a tinned sardine.

Because of all this, Mr Twit never went really hungry. By sticking out his tongue and curling it sideways to explore the hairy jungle around his mouth, he was always able to find a tasty morsel here and there to nibble on.

nation

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

rick_chasey

Sometimes you just don't want to come out.



Oh, that kind of beard...

wgwarburton

Hi,
Handy for feeding trolls :-)

I wear mine trimmed short, not "full on".
I don't have to shave in the morning, it keeps the wind off my face in winter, the sun in summer and I don't get any skin problems from shaving.
It's as clean as my face (!), and generally pretty kempt :-). Unlike you, for example, I never have any stubble...

I reckon it makes me look older and more reliable, which boosts credibility in the workplace.

The point? Well, it beats having to shave every morning... what a waste of time!

Hope that helps.

Cheers,
W.

rjsterry

@UE: Am currently experiencing massive convulsions of nostalgia. :D:D My favourite bit in The Twits was the bit about their house not having any windows so that nobody could look in, and it not having occurred to the Twits that windows might be for looking out of instead. Had pretty much the complete set of Dahl books when I was growing up <makes note to buy new set for miniRJS>

UndercoverElephant

rjsterry wrote:

@UE: Am currently experiencing massive convulsions of nostalgia. :D:D My favourite bit in The Twits was the bit about their house not having any windows so that nobody could look in, and it not having occurred to the Twits that windows might be for looking out of instead. Had pretty much the complete set of Dahl books when I was growing up <makes note to buy new set for miniRJS>

They are absolutely ace, aren't they? I've read my collection to the oldest two of mine, The Twits is a favourite of both, as is Matilda and The Witches. It's probably getting to the time where I could start the youngest on them too.

Kieran_Burns

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

shave while having a HOT bath or while in the Sauna

cjcp

[quote="Wallace1492"

But why oh why have a full on beard?
It's dirty, unkempt, probably smelly, full of dribble and old food, and must get pretty bad covered in sweat.... and as my dear departed Father always said, "Never trust a man with a beard!"

So, what is the point.....????[/quote]

In other words, it says to other people, "Go away. Don't speak to me. "

What was your question again? :twisted:

soundninjauk

I'm currently going with the 'fashionable stubble' approach. I keep it short enough that food and things are never a problem, but also it means I don't have to shave every day, which appeals to my sense of laziness.

kelsen

Unless it resembles anything like this...



I echo the sentiments that they are utterly pointless (sic)

notsoblue

Kieran_Burns wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

shave while having a HOT bath or while in the Sauna

I don't think people with well topiaried beards go to Saunas for a shave...

SimonAH

suzyb

No one seems to have stated the obvious...because it hides the double chin.

CyclingBantam

Because I like them.

Most people don't wear a beard and I like to wear one because people tell me I shouldn't.

I'm stubborn and I suit a bit of a beard far more than being clean shaven.

Wooliferkins

Because shaving is a complete waste of time and more importantly money. Since leaving the service of Aunty Betty and having to shave I estimate to have saved 8-10 beers a month in good hard dosh.

nation

Kieran_Burns wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

shave while having a HOT bath or while in the Sauna

I think I'd struggle to fit that into my morning routine.

It does work though. When I can't get away with the stubble (job interviews, wedddings, etc.) I've done the hot-towel-round-the-face-for-fifteen-minutes thing and it's mitigated it somewhat. It's just far too much hassle to do every morning.

rick_chasey

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

Keep shaving. I have to shave every morning for work, and after 6 months it stopped rashing - your skin toughens up.

UndercoverElephant

Rick Chasey wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

Keep shaving. I have to shave every morning for work, and after 6 months it stopped rashing - your skin toughens up.

Also, use a high quality, single-blade razor. A proper double-edge razor will last a lifetime and work better than any cartridge one. The more blades they shove into these things the more they irritate the skin.

Underscore

I did shave it off once but my wife told me to grow it back - yes, I know who wears the trousers in our house. I would love to sport a "Ming the Merciless" but I don't think that I'm capable of growing the eyebrows sufficiently...

_

secretsam

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

I too suffer from same but have learnt to deal with it.

Here begins the lesson:
1) Don't shave just after waking up, leave it a while to allow skin to settle
2) better still, shave at night (like what I do)
3) Use warm water to wet face prior to applying shaving material
4) Use a brush and work on a generous layer of gentle cream (Body Shop is good). Anything in a can is evil.
5) Circular motions with the brush, work into skin
6) Shave using a SHARP BLADE, one of the new 4/5/27 blade jobbies please
7) Go in direction of stubble only, never against the grain
8) use as few strokes as possible, avoid double passes
9) wash off excess cream using lukewarm water
10) dry face and allow to settle
11) use after shave balm on face (again, Body Shop good). Never apply cologne, etc. (all evil)
12) Moisturise regularly during the day and wash with plain water only, no soap

Enjoy

Here endeth the lesson

secretsam

SecretSam wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

I too suffer from same but have learnt to deal with it.

Here begins the lesson:
1) Don't shave just after waking up, leave it a while to allow skin to settle
2) better still, shave at night (like what I do)
3) Use warm water to wet face prior to applying shaving material
4) Use a brush and work on a generous layer of gentle cream (Body Shop is good). Anything in a can is evil.
5) Circular motions with the brush, work into skin
6) Shave using a SHARP BLADE, one of the new 4/5/27 blade jobbies please
7) Go in direction of stubble only, never against the grain
8) use as few strokes as possible, avoid double passes
9) wash off excess cream using lukewarm water
10) dry face and allow to settle
11) use after shave balm on face (again, Body Shop good). Never apply cologne, etc. (all evil)
12) Moisturise regularly during the day and wash with plain water only, no soap

Enjoy

Here endeth the lesson

The 8) is supposed to be a number 8 with a bracket after it.

Pesky smileys :evil:

rick_chasey

SecretSam wrote:

The 8) is supposed to be a number 8 with a bracket after it.

Pesky smileys :evil:

Do you see underneath the text box there is a "Disable Smilies in this post" ?

cjcp

Rick Chasey wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

Keep shaving. I have to shave every morning for work, and after 6 months it stopped rashing - your skin toughens up.

Decleor do a great pre-shave oil and post-shave moisturiser.

jonginge

cjcp wrote:

Rick Chasey wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

Keep shaving. I have to shave every morning for work, and after 6 months it stopped rashing - your skin toughens up.

Decleor do a great pre-shave oil and post-shave moisturiser.

Works well, Chris. Works well.

rick_chasey

I actually have to ask for permission if I want to grow a beard here, since that period of inbetween stubble is apparently "not professional" enough.

Agent57

If your dad doesn't have a beard, you've got two mums.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmFnarFSj_U

cjcp

JonGinge wrote:

cjcp wrote:

Rick Chasey wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

So I don't. I trim back to stubble and a goatee a couple of times a week or so.

Keep shaving. I have to shave every morning for work, and after 6 months it stopped rashing - your skin toughens up.

Decleor do a great pre-shave oil and post-shave moisturiser.

Works well, Chris. Works well.

Am considering shaving it off.

SimonAH

SecretSam wrote:

nation wrote:

I have never found a method of shaving that does not cause my skin to explode into a horrible rash.

I too suffer from same but have learnt to deal with it.

Here begins the lesson:
1) Don't shave just after waking up, leave it a while to allow skin to settle
2) better still, shave at night (like what I do)
3) Use warm water to wet face prior to applying shaving material
4) Use a brush and work on a generous layer of gentle cream (Body Shop is good). Anything in a can is evil.
5) Circular motions with the brush, work into skin
6) Shave using a SHARP BLADE, one of the new 4/5/27 blade jobbies please
7) Go in direction of stubble only, never against the grain
8) use as few strokes as possible, avoid double passes
9) wash off excess cream using lukewarm water
10) dry face and allow to settle
11) use after shave balm on face (again, Body Shop good). Never apply cologne, etc. (all evil)
12) Moisturise regularly during the day and wash with plain water only, no soap

Enjoy

Here endeth the lesson

Or here’s a thought…

Grow a beard
Trim it with barbers clippers roughly once a fortnight (or when it gets to the point that twirling bits of it will leave a visible ‘point’)
Swipe the bits of skin that you don’t want bearded about twice a week with a razor (round the throat in my case as I don’t want the beard-merges-with-chest-rug look) about once a week.

If you take ten to fifteen minutes to shave each morning I get an hour of additional life a week, or about four and a half days a year to spend doing nicer things than scraping my face with a flint.
8)