Best excuse for not going to work

13»

Comments

  • TLDNMCL
    TLDNMCL Posts: 2,779
    An ex-colleague:

    "Can't come in today because my Mum's cat died overnight."
    Mac
  • jacob2910
    jacob2910 Posts: 218
    Nifer wrote:
    Finbar Saunders wrote:
    langster wrote:
    I was late for work this morning as I took too many Viagra and couldn't get my trousers on.

    If you don't believe me ask your mom.

    I wouldn't go round boasting about being a necrophiliac if I were you!

    :lol:

    +1 :lol:
  • Valy
    Valy Posts: 1,321
    Man... all the lol's have been counter balanced with the nlols of the thermostat.
    London2Paris24 2014 Fundraising for Scope UK
    Facebook Page for more information and updates!
  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    My house is never allowed to drop below 20c all year, I love having air con and an open fireplace - win win !!

    Also bibles burn very fearsly though I think the local church is on to me :roll:
    Rule #5 // Harden The Feck Up.
    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
    Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
    Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    Excuses for not going to work :-

    Can't be fucked
    I hate you all and if I come in i might kill one or more of you
    Can't be fucked
    It's too far
    Why should I?
    It just boring and you're all below me ...

    I've tried it and frankly didn't enjoy it much
    Rule #5 // Harden The Feck Up.
    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
    Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
    Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  • shouldbeinbed
    shouldbeinbed Posts: 2,660
    Best excuse for a day off from a colleague (early 20s) He'd eaten too much ice cream the night before and was still feeling sick.
  • richk
    richk Posts: 564
    On Monday I used "got hit by a car" :x Now I'm on 'absence monitoring' because about 6 weeks ago I was off with kidney stones. :roll: Perhaps I'll send human remains a copy of the x-ray & police report? :twisted:
    There is no secret ingredient...
  • Fireblade96
    Fireblade96 Posts: 1,123
    "I resign"

    Worked for me :-)
    Misguided Idealist
  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    Fireblade96 wrote:
    "I resign"

    Worked for me :-)

    100% of the time, it works all the time ....
    Rule #5 // Harden The Feck Up.
    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
    Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
    Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  • dhope
    dhope Posts: 6,699
    RichK wrote:
    On Monday I used "got hit by a car" :x Now I'm on 'absence monitoring' because about 6 weeks ago I was off with kidney stones. :roll: Perhaps I'll send human remains a copy of the x-ray & police report? :twisted:

    Do
    Rose Xeon CW Disc
    CAAD12 Disc
    Condor Tempo
  • alitodd
    alitodd Posts: 104
    On Saturday, I did get hit by a car. Thus, college had one fewer pupils until today. Brilliant, except for the ridiculous amounts of pain I'm in...
    I know not where I am going, my future will decide. But it's not the destination, it's the glory of the ride.

    Giant Reign X1 2009 (With shiny bits)
  • daviesee
    daviesee Posts: 6,386
    Nifer wrote:
    So what if you don't have a thermostat? What then?

    Get some fitted? 8)
    None of the above should be taken seriously, and certainly not personally.
  • cyberknight
    cyberknight Posts: 1,238
    About 2 months ago i sheared my rib muscles and the pain killers i was prescribed meant i could not drive or operate machinery...

    I use electric tow motors and fork trucks at work :?

    I could have cycled but i could not even walk or breathe without pain.
    FCN 3/5/9
  • hammy7272
    hammy7272 Posts: 236
    One guy at our work didn't come in one day as his water pipes had frozen (it was June!) Needless to say he doesn't work with us anymore. Bless him.
  • Kieran_Burns
    Kieran_Burns Posts: 9,757
    cyberknight wrote:
    About 2 months ago i sheared my rib muscles and the pain killers i was prescribed meant i could not drive or operate machinery...

    I use electric tow motors and fork trucks at work :?

    I could have cycled but i could not even walk or breathe without pain.

    I contracted pleurisy one time (I creaked every time I breathed and it was agony),so I went to see the Doctor - it took her all of 1 minute to work out what was wrong, and told me that there were two types of pleurisy: 'wet' and 'dry'

    I asked "which do I have?"
    she responded (I kid you not) "Are you dead yet?"
    "Errrr...... no?"
    "Well, it'll be dry then"

    :shock:
    Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
    2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
    2011 Trek Madone 4.5
    2012 Felt F65X
    Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter

Categories