Reasons why I'm faster than you in rank order

oscarbudgie

Amazing how deluded some commuters can be about about their abilities. Any fool can put the hammer down for 3 or 4 miles on flat streets and then tell themselves they are a fast .For the record I think commuting miles, especially anything under 15 miles, are pretty much empty miles in terms of training or real bike fitness - like thinking you are good at sex because you do a lot of wanking. Do your heroics take place in London or Soton btw?

SamWise72

London. Nobody wants to race in Soton. And really, I don't think I'm a proper bike hero - I know any serious club rider would dust me over 20 miles. That's not the point though is it, it's the fun? And actually being able to put the hammer down over a short distance is a skill in itself, just not one that would help you in a real road race.

Gazzaputt

oscarbudgie wrote:

Amazing how deluded some commuters can be about about their abilities. Any fool can put the hammer down for 3 or 4 miles on flat streets and then tell themselves they are a fast .For the record I think commuting miles, especially anything under 15 miles, are pretty much empty miles in terms of training or real bike fitness - like thinking you are good at sex because you do a lot of wanking. Do your heroics take place in London or Soton btw?

I do 15 miles to and from work and use this time to real effectiveness in terms of building fitness.

Good intervals over a distance such as this helps build an good latic tolerance.

You can a more effective ride over a shorter distance than a plod mile munching.

oscarbudgie

So you're faster than me in the same way the pizza boy on his moped is faster than a Ferrari from a standing start- ie over the first 10 feet. Bully for you.

dhope

Damn straight, Cavendish is a pussy.

SamWise72

The more of this I read, the more depressed it makes me. I don't know if you read the Silly Commuting Racing thread, but the word "Silly" should be emphasized. I'm not an olympic athlete, I'm not a professional bike racer, or even a serious amateur. I just ride to work, and it's fun to ride faster than anyone else. Maybe you're faster than me, under certain circumstances, and that's fine. Your quote, however, is silly, isn't it? That's like a marathon runner telling a sprinter his ability is less worthwhile.

Maybe I'm faster down Kingsway and over Waterloo Bridge than you, maybe not. I'll bust my lungs trying to be, and then if I'm not, that's ok. And if I am, and you're faster over 50 miles, that's ok too. Chris Hoy may think that being fast over a short distance has a value, BTW, but that's not the point. If you don't get the irony in the bike hero posts, including mine, that go on here, you've missed the point.

oscarbudgie

I'm pretty sure I'm faster than you under all circumstances, except when when reaching for the irony escape button.

MonkeyMonster

oscarbudgie wrote:

Amazing how deluded some commuters can be about about their abilities. Any fool can put the hammer down for 3 or 4 miles on flat streets and then tell themselves they are a fast .For the record I think commuting miles, especially anything under 15 miles, are pretty much empty miles in terms of training or real bike fitness - like thinking you are good at sex because you do a lot of wanking. Do your heroics take place in London or Soton btw?

easy tiger and this is in the commuter so we can all be deluded together in a nice happy way. If you want to go wave your willy in a roadie sense feel free to wander over into the other forum for such things.

ps - ginge is actually really slow.

SimonAH

SamWise72 wrote:

The more of this I read, the more depressed it makes me. I don't know if you read the Silly Commuting Racing thread, but the word "Silly" should be emphasized. I'm not an olympic athlete, I'm not a professional bike racer, or even a serious amateur. I just ride to work, and it's fun to ride faster than anyone else. Maybe you're faster than me, under certain circumstances, and that's fine. Your quote, however, is silly, isn't it? That's like a marathon runner telling a sprinter his ability is less worthwhile.

Maybe I'm faster down Kingsway and over Waterloo Bridge than you, maybe not. I'll bust my lungs trying to be, and then if I'm not, that's ok. And if I am, and you're faster over 50 miles, that's ok too. Chris Hoy may think that being fast over a short distance has a value, BTW, but that's not the point. If you don't get the irony in the bike hero posts, including mine, that go on here, you've missed the point.

+1

SamWise72

oscarbudgie wrote:

I'm pretty sure I'm faster than you under all circumstances, except when when reaching for the irony escape button.

Alright, sure. It obviously matters to you a great deal. And if you are, then congrats on being faster than an overweight man of 38 on a folding bike. If not, I'll leave it to you to decide whether it's worth going on living. I'll be having fun either way, feeling good when I'm faster than people, and not really minding when I'm not.

Gazzaputt

SamWise72 wrote:

The more of this I read, the more depressed it makes me. I don't know if you read the Silly Commuting Racing thread, but the word "Silly" should be emphasized. I'm not an olympic athlete, I'm not a professional bike racer, or even a serious amateur. I just ride to work, and it's fun to ride faster than anyone else. Maybe you're faster than me, under certain circumstances, and that's fine. Your quote, however, is silly, isn't it? That's like a marathon runner telling a sprinter his ability is less worthwhile.

Maybe I'm faster down Kingsway and over Waterloo Bridge than you, maybe not. I'll bust my lungs trying to be, and then if I'm not, that's ok. And if I am, and you're faster over 50 miles, that's ok too. Chris Hoy may think that being fast over a short distance has a value, BTW, but that's not the point. If you don't get the irony in the bike hero posts, including mine, that go on here, you've missed the point.

Err you need to go back and read your first post and look at what you have posted above.

Problem the 'silly' in the SCR was lost a long long time ago and your post has only emphasized this point.

dhope

oscarbudgie wrote:

Amazing how deluded some commuters can be about about their abilities. Any fool can put the hammer down for 3 or 4 miles on flat streets and then tell themselves they are a fast .For the record I think commuting miles, especially anything under 15 miles, are pretty much empty miles in terms of training or real bike fitness - like thinking you are good at sex because you do a lot of wanking. Do your heroics take place in London or Soton btw?

I'm sure you're a legend in the sack, and you also come across as a complete wanker, Chapeau! :roll:

SamWise72

Gazzaputt wrote:

Err you need to go back and read your first post and look at what you have posted above.

Problem the 'silly' in the SCR was lost a long long time ago and your post has only emphasized this point.

Oh for goodness sake. I was having a mini-rant about people thinking a very expensive bike is the key to being fast, and I used "I'm faster than you" rather than "someone is faster than you" because it would make it a more interesting topic (which worked, but has backfired rather). Every point in my post stands WHEN I'm faster than someone, and when anyone else is. And really, read the SCR thread a bit. Do you really think when people talk about "hitting the boost button" and "turning up the awesome", and "my bow wave left him rocking" that they're doing anything other than having fun and overemphasising what they've done? Riding to work is when we all get to pretend to be Eddie Mercx, and it's NICE to pretend to be Eddie Mercx, but I don't think you'll find too many people who genuinely think they can hack it in a CAT 5 race because they're quickest along the Embankment.

I play around at SCR because it's fun, and it gives me motivation to ride faster. I need to get fitter and lose weight, so that's a good thing. I know 95% of people that I pass couldn't care less, and that's fine; it's still fun, and it still makes me ride faster. I also know that when someone responds, tries to chase me down, or shoulder checks constantly and attacks when I'm on their wheel, they're up for it, and that's fun too. I win more of those than I lose, but I don't go home and cry when I lose, and I get a nice endorphin rush, it's all good. I know fine well that anyone who races will hammer me over a rolling 50 mile course, no question, but that doesn't stop it being fun racing in London for giggles. If that offends the sensibilities of people who think they're "serious riders", then fine, but you'll pardon me if I don't care.

ndru

I think it's time for some to move to the boy-racer forum... Are you guys compensating for something?

SamWise72

Here's me 2 or so years ago, in the Smithfield Nocturne (on the right on the Downtube). I post this for 2 reasons; firstly, so that you can all mark me for a hammering if you see me Secondly, to make the point that I have tried competing on a (slightly) more real basis, and I didn't win. Of course I don't think I'm Lance Armstrong. I finished about halfway up my group, and was on the verge of puking, so I didn't have much more to give. I've lost 2 stone since then, and I'm faster now; in the same race, I'd expect to make the cut and race in the final (which I narrowly missed last time), but I would then be happy if I made the top half even. Ok?

Cafewanda

And I thought girls were sensitive

SamWise72

Cafewanda wrote:

And I thought girls were sensitive

It goes along with shaving your legs, I think

DonDaddyD

SamWise72 wrote:

The more of this I read, the more depressed it makes me. I don't know if you read the Silly Commuting Racing thread, but the word "Silly" should be emphasized. I'm not an olympic athlete, I'm not a professional bike racer, or even a serious amateur. I just ride to work, and it's fun to ride faster than anyone else. Maybe you're faster than me, under certain circumstances, and that's fine. Your quote, however, is silly, isn't it? That's like a marathon runner telling a sprinter his ability is less worthwhile.

Maybe I'm faster down Kingsway and over Waterloo Bridge than you, maybe not. I'll bust my lungs trying to be, and then if I'm not, that's ok. And if I am, and you're faster over 50 miles, that's ok too. Chris Hoy may think that being fast over a short distance has a value, BTW, but that's not the point. If you don't get the irony in the bike hero posts, including mine, that go on here, you've missed the point.

What the are you backing down!

For a second there I thought we had another alpha male on the website. Seems like I'm still the only one.

Where is your pride man! You laid the guantlet down. Challenge the Soton yokel blighter to race in London. Offer your wives up as the prize, swapping is fun see!

And while he's milling over the prospect of loosing his scalp. Get a tape measure, wrap it around your tensed thigh, take a picture and post it so that he knows his puny little goat legs cannot compare to the your raw and absolute power!

Roar in defiance to the naysayers and grumble bums who can't take a joke!!! Don't let them put prune juice in your cocktail! Cycling is your fun and your enjoyment and whatever fantasies you have about it are yours to enjoy! Share them! (They are fantasies though, we all know I am faster than you!)

If I'd made this thread it'd at least another 6 pages for my ego to be properly quenched... even then I'd have insulted someone, challenged someone to a race and evoked a response from a mod....

But that I suppose is what awesome does.

Shame!

:twisted:

Cafewanda

SamWise72

Awesome is as awesome does, I guess. To be fair, I HAVE posted a picture of myself for ridicule, and a picture of me racing at that.

UndercoverElephant

SamWise72 wrote:

Awesome is as awesome does, I guess. To be fair, I HAVE posted a picture of myself for ridicule, and a picture of me racing at that.

You're right, it would be hard to claim awsomnity after that photo. :twisted:

gtvlusso

I am faster than all of you anyway.....

At screwing up a perfectly good unix box.....

I also have a legit sub 20 min 10 mile TT time.......from my racing and hard drinking yoof.

Sadly, I am a bit too podgy and have too many children to warrant the good ol days again.......

Will stick to the odd scr and l'etape on a classic Colnago next year (assuming Mrs Gtvlusso approves the finances)

SamWise72

UndercoverElephant wrote:

SamWise72 wrote:

Awesome is as awesome does, I guess. To be fair, I HAVE posted a picture of myself for ridicule, and a picture of me racing at that.

You're right, it would be hard to claim awsomnity after that photo. :twisted:

Oh, I'm still claiming it. There should be an FCN modifier for "huge fat ass"!

UndercoverElephant

SamWise72 wrote:

UndercoverElephant wrote:

SamWise72 wrote:

Awesome is as awesome does, I guess. To be fair, I HAVE posted a picture of myself for ridicule, and a picture of me racing at that.

You're right, it would be hard to claim awsomnity after that photo. :twisted:

Oh, I'm still claiming it. There should be an FCN modifier for "huge fat ass"!

Well, it would make people have to pull out further to get past. And the gravitational pull would make dropping you harder too.

SamWise72

UndercoverElephant wrote:

SamWise72 wrote:

UndercoverElephant wrote:

SamWise72 wrote:

Awesome is as awesome does, I guess. To be fair, I HAVE posted a picture of myself for ridicule, and a picture of me racing at that.

You're right, it would be hard to claim awsomnity after that photo. :twisted:

Oh, I'm still claiming it. There should be an FCN modifier for "huge fat ass"!

Well, it would make people have to pull out further to get past. And the gravitational pull would make dropping you harder too.

It makes me significantly more inviting to draft, too. The draft zone is enormous.

oscarbudgie

Still got the dildo helmet?

SamWise72

Yep, that's still pretty much how I look. Brompton now, mostly, and might be weariing a softshell (and suit trousers).

DonDaddyD

SamWise72 wrote:

Yep, that's still pretty much how I look. Brompton now, mostly, and might be weariing a softshell (and suit trousers). Although now the trousers are tearing at the seams around the thigh as they struggle to contain my sheer and utter masculinity.

I would post a more up-to-date photo but legally I'm not allowed, apparently it makes women instantly give birth! I didn't want to do that to your wife. See I'm a nice guy!

ftfy

SamWise72

I could post a picture of my calves, which are generally reasonably impressive.

DonDaddyD

Sigh...

"work, much needs to be done, padawan"

Calves in the cycling sense and the words generally and reasonably just don't work.

Try this:

"I could post a picture of my calves, which are impressive."

See simples.