Chat-up lines

berylburton
berylburton Posts: 13
edited January 2010 in Commuting chat
What is the best chat-up line you have given or received when cycling?
«1

Comments

  • always_tyred
    always_tyred Posts: 4,965
    "Wow you are awesome. Why don't you come over to the sorority to sleep with me and all of my housemates?"
  • lost_in_thought
    lost_in_thought Posts: 10,563
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me'
    Me - 'Eh?'
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me... you were going at 25mph'
    Me - 'Ah' *looks mystified*
    Driver - 'Can I get your number?'

    Not the best, but certainly the most unusual.

    Others include 'I do lots of cycling, can we go for a ride together?' from a huge guy smoking in a car, and lots of unintelligible shouting from white vans.

    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'.

    Bless. :lol:
    FCN 7/1
    Viner Maxima, Tifosi CK7, Giant Bowery, Old commuter.
  • Kieran_Burns
    Kieran_Burns Posts: 9,757
    Always Tyred wrote:
    "Wow you are awesome. Why don't you come over to the sorority to sleep with me and all of my housemates?"

    ...and then you woke up....
    Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
    2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
    2011 Trek Madone 4.5
    2012 Felt F65X
    Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter
  • always_tyred
    always_tyred Posts: 4,965
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'
    This may not have been a chat up line.

    For example, I bet Elton John gets asked that a lot.
  • lost_in_thought
    lost_in_thought Posts: 10,563
    Always Tyred wrote:
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'
    This may not have been a chat up line.

    For example, I bet Elton John gets asked that a lot.

    :lol::lol:

    No, I bet he doesn't, everyone knows his isn't real.
    FCN 7/1
    Viner Maxima, Tifosi CK7, Giant Bowery, Old commuter.
  • cee
    cee Posts: 4,553
    not really a chat up line...but a young lady was singing..'Theres a hole in my pocket...' whilst I was not quite trackstanding, not quite slowed to a stop yet...at a set of traffic lights....while wearing a pair of shorts which I had torn a couple of weeks earlier (baggies....lycra underneath was still intact.....)

    I asked her if she was looking at my bum....she blushed.

    :D
    Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle, I believe in the future of the human race.

    H.G. Wells.
  • amnezia
    amnezia Posts: 590
    the usual chat up lines i get are

    "get out the road you c**t"
    "why aren't you riding in the cycle lane?"
    "W*NKER!"

    8)
  • always_tyred
    always_tyred Posts: 4,965
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Always Tyred wrote:
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'
    This may not have been a chat up line.

    For example, I bet Elton John gets asked that a lot.

    :lol::lol:

    No, I bet he doesn't, everyone knows his isn't real.
    Wait, let me get this straight - Elton John's hair isn't real?

    What about Bruce Willis?
  • Kieran_Burns
    Kieran_Burns Posts: 9,757
    amnezia wrote:
    the usual chat up lines i get are

    "get out the road you c**t"
    "why aren't you riding in the cycle lane?"
    "W*NKER!"

    8)

    You like it a bit rough then?

    Thinking back to when I was younger and slimmer... two girls standing by the side of the road when I went past out of the saddle "Look at the arse on that!"

    Then there was the school bus FULL of girls whooping and hollering as I raced their bus (and won!) when it pulled out as I started to pass it.

    My problem is: unless I'm smacked over the head I can't tell a chat up line from a "Good Morning! :oops:
    Chunky Cyclists need your love too! :-)
    2009 Specialized Tricross Sport
    2011 Trek Madone 4.5
    2012 Felt F65X
    Proud CX Pervert and quiet roadie. 12 mile commuter
  • suzyb
    suzyb Posts: 3,449
    peep peep...peep peep peep :wink:
    Whippet
  • R_T_A
    R_T_A Posts: 488
    One of the only things I've had shouted at me is "There aren't many of those to the pound!"

    I'm assuming she meant my rucksack.
    Giant Escape R1
    FCN 8
    "Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
    - Terry Pratchett.
  • rjsterry
    rjsterry Posts: 29,420
    Does mine from the two boy racers in Mitcham the other night count?

    "Oi, mate, your willy's 'angin' out"

    :?
    1985 Mercian King of Mercia - work in progress (Hah! Who am I kidding?)
    Pinnacle Monzonite

    Part of the anti-growth coalition
  • biondino
    biondino Posts: 5,990
    *young lady sees me
    *young lady's eyes move downards
    *young lady's mouth drops open

    I enjoyed that :)
    My Focus / My Bob Jackson
    Blog (incl. bikes)
  • salsarider79
    salsarider79 Posts: 828
    rjsterry wrote:
    Does mine from the two boy racers in Mitcham the other night count?

    "Oi, mate, your willy's 'angin' out"

    :?

    So good of them to notice.... :wink:
    jedster wrote:
    Just off to contemplate my own mortality and inevitable descent into decrepedness.
    FCN 3 or 4 on road depending on clothing
    FCN 8 off road because I'm too old to go racing around.
  • Christophe3967
    Christophe3967 Posts: 1,200
    biondino wrote:
    *young lady sees me
    *young lady's eyes move downards
    *young lady's mouth drops open

    I enjoyed that :)

    they spotted your saddle then.... :wink:
    Bike1
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/35118936@N07/3258551288/
    Bike 2
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/35118936@N ... otostream/
    New Bike
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/35118936@N07/3479300346/
  • DonDaddyD
    DonDaddyD Posts: 12,689
    Nice bike.
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me'
    Me - 'Eh?'
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me... you were going at 25mph'
    Me - 'Ah' *looks mystified*
    Driver - 'Can I get your number?'

    Did it work?


    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'.

    A question, surely?
    Food Chain number = 4

    A true scalp is not only overtaking someone but leaving them stopped at a set of lights. As you, who have clearly beaten the lights, pummels nothing but the open air ahead. ~ 'DondaddyD'. Player of the Unspoken Game
  • lost_in_thought
    lost_in_thought Posts: 10,563
    DonDaddyD wrote:
    Nice bike.
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me'
    Me - 'Eh?'
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me... you were going at 25mph'
    Me - 'Ah' *looks mystified*
    Driver - 'Can I get your number?'

    Did it work?

    Nope, lights changed and I rode off, still rather mystified.

    DonDaddyD wrote:

    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'.

    A question, surely?

    I can see why you'd think so, it was preceded by 'phwooaaar alright darling' which got no response, and when I confirmed that my hair was, in fact, real, I got more of the phwooaaar-ing. Lights changed, cycled away.
    FCN 7/1
    Viner Maxima, Tifosi CK7, Giant Bowery, Old commuter.
  • bails87
    bails87 Posts: 12,998
    None! :(
    MTB/CX

    "As I said last time, it won't happen again."
  • mrc1
    mrc1 Posts: 852
    Less of a chat up line and more of an unanswerable put down when wearing lycra:

    "You are obviously feeling the cold"........ :oops:
    http://www.ledomestiquetours.co.uk

    Le Domestique Tours - Bespoke cycling experiences with unrivalled supported riding, knowledge and expertise.

    Ciocc Extro - FCN 1
  • Stevo_666
    Stevo_666 Posts: 61,206
    Kieran_Burns wrote:
    Thinking back to when I was younger and slimmer... two girls standing by the side of the road when I went past out of the saddle "Look at the ars* on that!"
    Why didn't you use your brakes at that point? If that wasn't obvious then I don't know what is :P
    Kieran_Burns wrote:
    Then there was the school bus FULL of girls whooping and hollering as I raced their bus (and won!) when it pulled out as I started to pass it.
    Surely you should have followed the bus to its destination for future reference ?(Assuming of course that the bus was full of 6th formers rather than 'jail bait' :wink: )
    "I spent most of my money on birds, booze and fast cars: the rest of it I just squandered." [George Best]
  • LazyBoycp
    LazyBoycp Posts: 320
    Closest I got to a chat up line was a schoolgirl grabbing my bum while I was doing a trackstand at a set of lights. :D
  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me'
    Me - 'Eh?'
    Driver - 'I wouldn't want you to kick me... you were going at 25mph'
    Me - 'Ah' *looks mystified*
    Driver - 'Can I get your number?'

    Not the best, but certainly the most unusual.

    Others include 'I do lots of cycling, can we go for a ride together?' from a huge guy smoking in a car, and lots of unintelligible shouting from white vans.

    Oh and two young blokes in a peugeot who went for 'is your hair real?'.

    Bless. :lol:

    so did you? And is that your real hair? :)
    Rule #5 // Harden The Feck Up.
    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
    Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
    Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  • itboffin
    itboffin Posts: 20,064
    biondino wrote:
    *young lady sees me
    *young lady's eyes move downards
    *young lady's mouth drops open

    I enjoyed that :)

    has DDD stolen your login details? :)
    Rule #5 // Harden The Feck Up.
    Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
    Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
    Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  • redvee
    redvee Posts: 11,922
    I had a bloke shout at me that my arse looked good whilst I was wearing lycra shorts :shock:
    I've added a signature to prove it is still possible.
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    biondino wrote:
    *young lady sees me
    *young lady's eyes move downards
    *young lady's mouth drops open....

    .....I enjoyed that :)

    Fixed that for you :wink:
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • colintrav
    colintrav Posts: 1,074
    berylburton wrote:
    What is the best chat-up line you have given or received when cycling?


    Judging by your name your a lady or you a bloke pretending to be a lady ???


    Anyways ... If you are a lady and your out on your bike and it's just you and him with no body else around what would be your first assumption .. on a cycle trail or on a Country road

    Most ladies will presume the bloke has a hidden agenda ... Now if it was a lass hittin on you then thats a different ball game alltogether

    It's a known fact that most women feel more nervous when they see any bloke cycling / walking behind /coming towards them ,
  • suzyb
    suzyb Posts: 3,449
    I'd think he was taking the piss.
    Whippet
  • whyamihere
    whyamihere Posts: 7,714
    You should hear some of the filth prawny comes out with when we ride together. Definitely trumps anything posted so far. ;)

    Note: May be a lie.
  • prawny
    prawny Posts: 5,440
    whyamihere wrote:
    You should hear some of the filth prawny comes out with when we ride together. Definitely trumps anything posted so far. ;)

    Note: May be a lie.

    Dude that just sounds dodgy, people will start talking! Especially with my new found obsession with Glee.
    Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
    Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
    Vitus Sentier VRS - 2017
  • mtb-idle
    mtb-idle Posts: 2,179
    Nice legs, what time do they open?
    FCN = 4

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