advice on anti cyclist comment from work mate

marksteven
marksteven Posts: 208
edited November 2009 in Commuting chat
a certain work mate of mine has over the last 2 years turned every time we meet into an anti cyclist comment , quite often saying he'd like to knock off the filtering cyclists with his door . today he critized my new cree r2 light ranting it was a torch not a bike light, as i left he shouted dont forget ya lights , & i bit saying why dont u f**k off :evil: :oops: . im considering puting a complaint into work about his comments . Q should i ? :(
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Comments

  • prj45
    prj45 Posts: 2,208
    Sounds like bullying, and he sounds slightly off balance.

    You might approach your HR dept and ask what to do, but then if thing's don't change after that take it further.

    Ranting about a bike light sounds like he's having some personal issues that are being taken into the workplace.
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  • amnezia
    amnezia Posts: 590
    complaint about what?? a few stupid comments?

    just ignore him, he's only doing it because it gets a rise out of you.
  • the_village_idiot
    the_village_idiot Posts: 150
    as physical intervention is a dangerous area in the workplace, personally i would rip the p!ss without mercy
  • snellgrove
    snellgrove Posts: 171
    Perhaps he feels threatened by you in some way.

    It takes a real man to walk through an office in lycra ;)
  • camerone
    camerone Posts: 1,232
    i had some office banter with a colleague during which he said that all cyclists were gay. he was slightly chubby so i merely pointed out in a very loud voice with people around and some real venom in my voice that i'd rather be gay than a fat basterd. he didnt do it again....
  • morgs2001
    morgs2001 Posts: 159
    The guy sounds like a real pr1ck,
    confrontation isnt worth it ,taking the P155 back will just add fuel to the flames,
    I deal with people like this by ignoring them ,dont rise to the bait ,even agree with them sometimes just to take the sting out of there comments .By trying to bait you they are after a reaction ,dont give them one.
  • ddraver
    ddraver Posts: 26,742
    What if I'm both a cyclist and a fat bastard? :cry:

    If you can't ignore him think of something really snide to say back to him and it ll soon shut him up. If you can, smile serenely and remmeber that his penis is tiny..
    We're in danger of confusing passion with incompetence
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  • always_tyred
    always_tyred Posts: 4,965
    amnezia wrote:
    complaint about what?? a few stupid comments?

    just ignore him, he's only doing it because it gets a rise out of you.
    I don't know about that. He probably really does hate cyclists.

    Would you be happy to be in the proximity of the guy in the vicinity of work? The odds are good seeing as you would be going to and from the same place.

    Its bullying. It should be stopped. I would record the frequency of comments for a while. Merely "often" will probably be ignored.
  • fossyant
    fossyant Posts: 2,549
    Tell him you need bright lights for dozy gits like him.....

    Tell him he's only jealous of your supreme fitness, the slob.....
  • fossyant
    fossyant Posts: 2,549
    Or better still, keep blowing him kisses...... :D
  • greg66_tri_v2.0
    greg66_tri_v2.0 Posts: 7,172
    Isn't there something about using a D-lock that might help...?
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  • cjcp
    cjcp Posts: 13,345
    ddraver wrote:
    What if I'm both a cyclist and a fat bastard? :cry:

    Then good for you getting out on the bike. :)

    Ask him if he grunted something next time he makes a comment.
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  • merkin
    merkin Posts: 452
    Just laugh at (not with) him and try and come back with a witty put down. Think one up beforehand as nobody can come up with something on the spot. Everyone has something they are sensitive to. You just have to find his weak spot. Bald head, prematurely going grey, still living at home, lack of ladies in his life, fat gut etc. But enough about me.... :oops:
    Alternatively if he really is perfect in every way ignore him and rise above it, who gives a monkeys hoops what some tool like him has to say. Sticks and stones and all that. I wouldn't make it official unless I was really getting to me as in reality it can reflect badly on your ability to mix with co-workers or handle situations.
    Let us know how you get on.
  • AndyManc
    AndyManc Posts: 1,393
    There's a fine line between banter and harassment/bullying.

    If these 'comments' are everyday ,day after day and are numerous then it would certainly constitute harassment.

    IMO , HR are a bunch of useless b*********.

    You have also got to be careful how you respond, threats of violence, verbal abuse etc could backfire and you could find your own conduct under investigation.

    How you respond depends on who you work for, if it's big organisation and the comments are constant, first warn him to keep his views to himself, then if that doesn't work (it won't) take it to a union rep or HR.

    If it's a small company it's going to be difficult.

    It easy to say just give it him back, but that can often cause further problems.

    Basically …. Just d-lock the c***.


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  • bigmat
    bigmat Posts: 5,134
    Just tell him to f*** off. Oh, you already did... :lol:

    Seriously though, its just words and posturing isn't it? Probably he's a bit too thick to think of anything else "witty" to say. I wouldn't be wasting my time with HR, just steer clear if he's that annoying.
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  • fossyant
    fossyant Posts: 2,549
    What sort of car has he got...come on...we'll give you some ammo....
  • Onan
    Onan Posts: 321
    I don't think it's bullying if you haven't made it clear in no uncertain terms that he's really pissing you off, and you don't intend to put up with it. If he carries on after you've made this point, then he can't claim he just thought it was banter, and had no idea it was getting to you.

    I think if you complain above his head before you've had it out with him, you're in danger of looking unreasonable in front of your colleagues, and being accused of over-reacting.

    I'd just wait until the next time he says something that annoys you and tell him you don't find him funny, you never have, and you'd appreciate if he'd keep his ridiculous opinions to himself.
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  • deptfordmarmoset
    deptfordmarmoset Posts: 3,118
    saying he'd like to knock off the filtering cyclists with his door

    Seems like he's frustrated by seeing cyclists pass him while his way is blocked by all the other stationary cars in front of him. Do as would do on a bike, get round him - he's only p!ssed off with you because you can get round him :wink:
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  • marksteven
    marksteven Posts: 208
    oh by the way he drives 1 of those rover 75 zg things
  • bradford
    bradford Posts: 195
    marksteven wrote:
    an anti cyclist comment , quite often saying he'd like to knock off the filtering cyclists with his door .
    My old boss used to make exactly the same comment to me,trouble was what could i do about it? Clothe's line the Troll or ignore him,i chose to ignore him :wink:
  • Brian-Mc
    Brian-Mc Posts: 71
    Rover 75 - driven by pipe smoking, slipperswearing, flat capped old duffers!

    Doesn't matter that it's the ZG, still a chinese old duffers motor, and his anti cyclist rants obviously mean that he is a geriatric, colostomy bagged old git. :)

    don't let this narrow minded bigot get to you. rise above it and laugh at him in a pitying kind of way. that should annoy him!
  • fossyant
    fossyant Posts: 2,549
    Better tell him he better not crash it...not too many body parts about......(or are they sorted now....)

    MG ZT - not the wheezy diesel is it, or the 2.5....V6...

    Old duffers car....wannabe chav.....?
  • andyb78
    andyb78 Posts: 156
    marksteven wrote:
    oh by the way he drives 1 of those rover 75 zg things

    Says it all really. Tell him your SPDs are worth more than his Chinese door...

    Seriously though - if this carries on, it's defo workplace bullying. It'll depend on how you want to aprroach it though I spose...
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  • alfablue
    alfablue Posts: 8,497
    Brian-Mc wrote:
    Rover 75 - driven by pipe smoking, slipperswearing, flat capped old duffers!

    Doesn't matter that it's the ZG, still a chinese old duffers motor, and his anti cyclist rants obviously mean that he is a geriatric, colostomy bagged old git. :)

    don't let this narrow minded bigot get to you. rise above it and laugh at him in a pitying kind of way. that should annoy him!
    inappropriate :x
  • bradford
    bradford Posts: 195
    It's a Rover,the person inside is barely alive! :shock: it's a crappy Rover! :shock:
  • NGale
    NGale Posts: 1,866
    Ignore him. Simples, as the meerkat says :lol:
    Officers don't run, it's undignified and panics the men
  • Flasheart
    Flasheart Posts: 1,278
    Onan wrote:

    I'd just wait until the next time he says something that annoys you and tell him you don't find him funny, you never have, and you'd appreciate if he'd keep his ridiculous opinions to himself.

    Then D Lock the cnut ?
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  • UndercoverElephant
    UndercoverElephant Posts: 5,796
    It's a well know fact that everyone who drives a MG has a penis roughly the size of a normal man's little finger nail. Other than that, it's just banter; some people take it too far, but either ignore him or retaliate. Or give his wife a good rogering, she can't be happy with a mere fingernail now, can she?
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  • lost_in_thought
    lost_in_thought Posts: 10,563
    Quite honestly, if some exchanges about torches and stuff about knocking off filterers with his door are the worst of it then I wouldn't worry.

    I'd make light of it, no point in losing sleep over this type of thing.
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  • wgwarburton
    wgwarburton Posts: 1,863
    lost_in_thought wrote:
    Quite honestly, if some exchanges about torches and stuff about knocking off filterers with his door are the worst of it then I wouldn't worry.

    I'd make light of it, no point in losing sleep over this type of thing.

    Yeah....best to ignore it and let it go away.
    On the other hand- If it's constant and getting you down, then just point out to him that you've got tired of it: "havn't you got better things to do?", "stopped being funny after the third time you said it", that sort of thing. Give him time to move on (a day or two), then if he tries again you could try a simple "Come on Brian, stop being a prick".
    If he won't take the hint, then it might be necessary to escalate (it's harrassment, effectively). A firm "Look, I've had enough of this, just drop it before I have to go whining to HR" should let him know you're prepared to take it further.
    Alternatively (or as well?) It might also be worth letting your boss or team leader or whoever know that he's getting you down ("That guy Brian is really getting me down, can you have a word with him/his boss for me?")- if they are good at their job they'll have a quiet word, escalate on your behalf or advise you on the most appropriate way to address it within your organisation.

    Hope this helps.

    Cheers,
    W.

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