Does anyone suffer from depression?

synchronicity

Two years ago, I was diagnosed with clinical or medical depression at around 29 years of age.

I stopped taking all medication in Jan/Feb this year... but I just seem to have lost all the energy, postitivity & motivation that I had before.

This is something I thought would never happen to me, being such a hyper-positive go-getter type of person. I'm just wondering how many other people suffer this condition. For how long have you known you've had it, and have you ever felt right afterwards?

expresso love

Very common problem. If you want some good information, lucidly written by a scientist and fellow sufferer rather than a therapist, try reading 'Malignant Sadness' by Lewis Wolpert, available from Amazon.
Best treatments in my view; try deliberately to cultivate optimism - and there is a whole literature available on this - a little bit of meditation practice helps and as much exercise as you can manage, to get your endorphins going. As the man said -ride your bike. The hardest part is getting started.
Good luck.

BUICK

Yes. CBT arranged through my GP helped, eventually, a great deal. Riding my bike has also helped massively. These days I am much better equipped to deal with stresses and triggers and have broken out of bad habits that made things worse for me. Bizarrely, a turning point for me was a couple of lines out of a poem that is well known enough to have become something of a platitude: Thy fate is the common fate of all, Into each life some rain must fall. It's a simple and true observation - most people suffer some sort of brush with a form of depression or mental illness in their lifetime, just as people get physically ill. It's part of life - and for me, feeling like I really KNEW that to be true made it easier.

McBain_v1

Never been really depressed, been "brung low by a woman" a few times but then what bloke hasn't :?:

Best cure... get some new bling for the bike, new gear to wear and then get out and ride :!:

ColinJ

There's a big discussion on depression over on CycleChat at the moment. I'm surprised how many cyclists are fellow-sufferers.

natrix

IMHO there's a big difference between being depressed and suffering with clinical depression. I've had clinical depression on and off for 15 years or so and low level medication seems to be the only long term treatment.

Riding a bike and having an optimistic outlook can only help so far.

jimmythecuckoo

I had given up cycling with a back injury that required monthly treatment until my divorce. I wouldn't go so far as to say I was feeling clinically depressed at that time, but I certainly wasn't too happy with my lot.

My family bought me a mountain bike for £119 to cheer me up and that let to a road bike, and then a TT bike and then...

Three years on and I have never felt better.

I now know the part cycling plays in helping me stay level headed (despite what those who know me might say!!) and active and I can use it to manage work stress. Its funny but if I dont cycle or have a run, after a couple of days I start to notice I am more cranky.

andrewjoseph

The problem with riding the bike and being depressed is that you can see too many 'secluded' spots and handy looking trees.

That said, when I'm feeling particularly low, I can't bring myself to get out on my bike to ride to secluded spots with handy trees..

ChrisLS

...yeah I have suffered with depression. I didn't realize I was depressed...I was full of energy, doing everything at a hundred miles an hour, bed late, awake at four...I was buzzing...I would put a favourite song on and play it over and over again...I was manic...then one day I just crashed, fell apart, a crying mess...saw the doctor, didn't take the medication and clawed my way back...depression lurks in the background but I know how I can deal with it...

synchronicity, have you tried a therapist, I found talking really, really helpful...

P-Jay

I sometime suffer with a bit of the old black dog, can be really bad. I don't notice it coming on sometimes and just sit in a grump for days on end. I've runined a good few christmases for myself that way, happens more in winter than summer.

I kind of fell upon a remedy by mistake. I started taking Fish Oil tablets about 6 months ago to help with my joints, only read later about the fatty acids it really perks me up. Probably more of an indication of my poor diet than anything else.

Monty Dog

I suffered from stress-induced depression a few years ago and can relay my experiences: Cycling / exercise is a great help from the endorphin boost, but careful that it doesn't translate into obsessive / manic behaviours - try and retain a sense of perspective in terms of training volume because injury could also create problems. I took a minimum dose of mild anti-depressants, but even at these levels it had an impact - it takes a while to get used to them, there are side-effects and coming-off can be quite difficult - it took me nearly a year to come off them. I'm not sure I'd use them again - try alternative therapies too. Being in a deep, dark hole can be self-absorbing at times - try and make considerations for spouses, partners and friends. Consider depression to be a journey and strive for light at the end of the tunnel - the more you look for the light then the more likely you are to get out. Despite being off work for nearly a year and a whole host of personal and professional issues I've had to come through in the last few years looking back I'd say that it wasn't just a negative experience - I probably have more compassion now and a greater perspective on what I want from life.

pneumatic

Apparently, 1 in 4 people experiences a mental health issue in their lifetime, so the answer to your question is "yes, lots of people do." I did, after a burn-out at work and, as with other people here, it was riding my bike that got me out of it.

Since the feeling of depression is chemically induced (the brain responds to a stimulus by triggering a release of various substances to bring you down), it seems to require a bit of chemical warfare to tackle the problem. That means drugs, or the endorphins from exercise or intellectual activity to suppress the negative stimulus (whatever is bothering you deep down) and increase the counter-stimulus (whatever might make you more optimistic and positive). Diet seems to be a factor too; alcohol, coffee and refined sugar add to the volatility of your mood and therefore make the problem worse, not better.

Depression seems to be a spectrum from a bit disappointed to clinically disabled, so, although I turned down the offer of drugs in favour of a lot of cycling and a bit of talking therapy, that might not work for everyone.

FSR_XC

I have experienced it with someone close to me. They would either be down or moody a lot of the time. Medication helped and controlled the moods well.

The big issue is 'coming off the meds'. They knew the meds are addictive so decided they had to get off them. So without speaking to a doctor they cut down the meds by half for a month, then completely.

You need to be very strong to do this and need support. Yep, you'll get down, but what you need to tell yourself is that 'it is not you that is down, it is your reliance on the medication causing this'. The first 3 months were like they were before medication, but then it got lots better & if anything, they are now more positive than they ever were.

chuckcork

Cycling regularly does it for me. I've a strong tendency towards the negative, and can have rather bad mood swings, as much a result of life experiences along the lines of if you feeling good about yourself, don't worry because someone will soon be along to change all that and make you feel like sh!t again. I'm one of those people who tend to take things personally as well, it doesn't take much to get me down as a result.

Cycling however I can put my energy, anger etc into going faster or into fighting the wind and the weather, and then the doing so drives away the bad feelings I have, mostly anyway. When its really bad weather I just tell myself its character building which seems as useful mental trick to pull as any when the weather is cr@p.

Obsession of course can be a problem though, I've called a martyr more than once, personally I just don't know why people wouldn't want to go cycling on a Sunday just because it is sleeting...? Of course it helps I like being outdoors! And if I'm in a good mood anyway it can be very enjoyable which is when cycling is a real bonus.

And of course when I get home I have my beautiful little girl (13 months) to give a kiss to so days usually end better than not (now).

keef66

two periods of clinical depression for me at age 45 and 48, and thinking about it, probably earlier but not diagnosed as such. Work related stress seemed to trigger it off. Been on a selection of antidepressants, all of them SSRI's (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors) like Prozac, Seroxat etc.
For me they kind of take the edge off the gloomiest feelings, but leave me feeling very woolly and not motivated to do anything. Bizarre range of side-effects including hideous night sweats, and chronic constipation, which in turn led to haemarrhoids and a trip to Dr Slowe's rectal clinic for a session with his soldering iron I'd rather forget. One possible beneficial side effect of SSRI's for blokes is difficulty reaching orgasm......

When first launched, we were told that SSRI's worked by boosting serotonin levels in the brain. That however didn't explain why they take 4-6 weeks to have any antidepressant effect (the side effects kick in straight away!)
Now it is believed they work by stimulating the growth of new nerve cells in the hippocampus, which explains the delay. (The hippocampus shrinks in depression)
Exercise will also stimulate hippocamal growth, which is why I'm off the meds and on the bike and also swimming.

Also had a bit of counselling through work, which helped a lot more than the pills.

And splashing a grand on a new bike is a good pick-me-up too! Epic tell me they have built it up but I can't get over there for the final fitting for 2 weeks. Torture!

synchronicity

Thank you all so very much for the replies!
It's been great reading all of them.

I have been exercising in the last week & felt better for it.

idaviesmoore

My Dad suffered all his life with clinical depression itfo manic depression. This was throughout the 80's when depression still had a clear stigma attatched to it. I was only young when he started displaying symptoms but after 5 years I had got used to it. The problem in those days (apart from tabboo) was that nobody really understood what drugs did what and many depressives ended up as guinea pigs for basic clinical trials. My father recieved repeated bouts of ECT (shock treatment-which was arbitrary treatment in those days) and all manner of drugs. None of which ever worked for long periods. In the end it was hard to know him as 'MY DAD' because he wasn't the person who I'd known as a very young child. I suppose he ended up being like a good friend of the family as you could never really get to know him because there was too many 'HIMS' to know.Difficult to explain but maybe you catch my drift.

I can honestly say though, that having experianced clinical depression at fairly close hand it gave me a unique and priviledged outlook on mental illness. It scares many people, both sufferes and loved ones and effects everybody in many differant ways. But it doesn't really scare me now (there are obvious exceptions) I understand and appreciate the condition and the issued associated with it.

And the medication and advise that is available has travelled light years. MI is no longer such a shocking (or ridiculous) condition as once it was. I think most people, truth be told, suffer or have suffered from mild bouts at one time or another. The key is to get help early on and don't try to tough it out. It's not big or clever to waste most of your life being scared like my dad did.

Synchro, I wish you well

claash

I have recently been diagnosed as bipolar (manic depressive as it once was!)

Life is great when I am high (for me any way!!)

BUT
I really hate my black times.... and, as someone already said ,getting out on my bike or even trying to think about cycling during these periods is nearly impossible.
The stupid thing is, I know that cycling (or any type of exercise for that matter) is a great help and it really does alleviate some of the down......

Keep going, keep trying, it does get better. It can sometimes just feel like the journey is taking forever!! Don't give up. Even if you aren't sure at the moment there are loads of folks around you all willing you on to success!!

pb21

Depression holds me back like an invisible barrage of powerful currents
After some time passes this becomes normality
Until you unhappy just to be alive
Whilst at the same time feeling as blue as the night sky that you are missing out on something.

pneumatic

I used to have to deal with employers' attitudes to mental health issues as part of my job.

There has been a change, but it is gradual and patchy (i.e. there are still plenty of Gene Hunts out there, if you have ever watched Life on Mars).

The primary reaction to an employee with MHI's is fear. This manifests itself variously as:

ridicule (nothing like a bit of humiliation, when you are feeling depressed already! :roll: )
avoidance (ignore it, marginalise or just get rid of the person)
defensiveness (worry about the person suing you for having caused it)
"management" (put on some pressure until they snap out of it, or just snap)

Once you get them over that lot of unhelpful attitudes, you can make progress, but if you are the one suffering, you can't do that yourself. You need a good advocate such as another sympathetic manager or really switched on employee representative.

However, as I say, it IS getting better.

Lysander

I have suffered with depression for most of my adult life. I had a course of ECT about two years ago which has helped to an extent. At its worse I have had to go into hospital as I cannot look after myself when I'm very distressed.
I always find this time of year a real struggle with the days becoming shorter.
As someone else said if your feeling a bit fed up go and buy some bling for your bike, it does help. Or maybe something from Assos.

pjh

Best advice I've ever been given is "When you feel low, DO SOMETHING, it doesn't matter what it is but DO SOMETHING, DO ANYTHING".

Walk the dog, cut the grass, clean the car .... doesn't matter how tedious! Usually 5 minutes after I've started whatever it is... I've forgotten I was feeling down.

My grandad always said to me when I was a kid that "Honest labour bears a lovely face".

I never knew what he meant then :oops: but that's what I think of now as soon as I start to feel a bit low.

Captain Fagor

Another vote for "Absolutely".

Being unable to identify the precise source of my own chronic dissatisfaction with life - and not actually having consulted any GP or professional about this - leads me to think my condition isn't as bad as others' here. But whatever it is, it has lasted about twenty years so far.

Cycling certainly helps as a source of happiness, or at least a temporary distraction from my malaise. However, if I do a few too many miles then I can end up feeling more depressed. And don't mention Christmas - absolutely the worst time of the year!

wiffachip

not depression, but 28 years of severe anxiety.

get really hacked off with making excuses to get out of run of the mill situations and hate trying to hide it from the kids.

cycling definitely helps, well exercise in general, but the knees won't stand for football anymore

well done for starting this thread, no-one likes to admit to any sort of mental problem

knedlicky

I’ve not suffered from depression but one of my close relatives, one of my immediate neighbours, one of my close work colleagues and one of my cycling club mates all suffered from depression to the extent that the first three all temporarily ended up in mental treatment institutions and the last committed suicide.

From their experiences and in three cases eventual recovery, I’d say it was wrong to “deliberately to cultivate optimism”, as one replier has written, rather it’s better to cultivate a laissez-faire attitude, with an honest (not superficial) positive aspect and outlook, which isn’t quite the same, by far.

I imagine any activity is good as outlet or contrast or means of achieving identity, so cycling too, although I suspect social contact and interaction is more important, which, by the nature of the sport, not all cyclists do well at. I think both activity and contact are needed in any plan, so better self-value comes from both sides.

jimmythecuckoo

This is an amazing thread and has certainly opened my eyes (widely) to the widespread nature of the illness.

unclemalc

Having someone to share those things that are possibly causing the symptoms really does help.
For some reason people have often come to me and unloaded (hence 'unclemalc'... )
and I have no problem with that.
My own troubles only manifested themselves when I found myself on the top of Caer Caradoc, in tears, ranting, on a sleety January day, when I should have been at work...

I had some chemicals from the Doc for it but subsequently found that getting back into cycling was all it took to break the circle. Seems daft , but that's all it took.

IME - don't bottle it up - get it out there to someone...

DavidBelcher

pneumatic wrote:

Since the feeling of depression is chemically induced (the brain responds to a stimulus by triggering a release of various substances to bring you down), it seems to require a bit of chemical warfare to tackle the problem. That means drugs, or the endorphins from exercise or intellectual activity to suppress the negative stimulus (whatever is bothering you deep down) and increase the counter-stimulus (whatever might make you more optimistic and positive). Diet seems to be a factor too; alcohol, coffee and refined sugar add to the volatility of your mood and therefore make the problem worse, not better.

Depression seems to be a spectrum from a bit disappointed to clinically disabled, so, although I turned down the offer of drugs in favour of a lot of cycling and a bit of talking therapy, that might not work for everyone.

I've not experienced depression myself, but was going to chip in with a comment that I've read a few times that regular exercise apparently goes a long way towards helping for the very reasons you've mentioned. So, it isn't a panacea, but keep turning those pedals, folks!

David

toshmund

My maternal grandfather was a bit of a nervous wreck. Kind of ground all of the confidence out of that side of the family. My mother had ECT years ago (suffering from Palpatations - the person feels that their heart is racing all of the time. Leads to anxiety, I think...) As a result of all this, I kind of live down the motorway a bit - to stay out of the network, thinking I would be dragged into the circle, so to speak.

Am concious sometimes that I am a bit dark! lol. I prefer to describe it as being "very pragmatic". I was in the Gulf in 90/91 and had all the cocktails - no syndromes or anything, yet though...Feel that I over-compensate, if you know what I mean? Can come across a bit harsh.

Think those daylight alarm clocks are supposed to be great alleviators of depression. Daily dose of Vitamin D, the mood setting to wake up to. That, and not watching Panorama/Horizon!

I tried to volunteer to be a Samaritan counsellor once...not a good scenario.

howiejmidlands

My posts on this site are usually jokey, sarcastic or i think funny.

Do i admit i had depression...............................................yes.

Been there, had the time in hospital, had the tablets, had the talking therapy. If anyone ever says to someone, who is depressed, pull yourself together......think. Would you say to a cancer patient.........get yourself better.
If you could, you would. I would not like any person to have the black downward spiral of dark thoughts i had. I was saved by my GP. I wanted a "pick me up", she diagonosed depression.
Close quarters to the death of a colleague in Norhtern Irealnd when i was on Tour, loss of my business and the personal debt got, broken marriage, sudden death of my dear old mum...................but us roughy toughy old blokes dont cry. No we just store up all the hatred, loss, bitterness until it becomes a cancer of the mind.
Am i better...............today yes.
Will i be better tomorrow.......... i hope so.
My love of things i used to love, cycling especially, have helped me.
I now have more passion for my work, my play and my relaxation.
I have my life back and i bloody love it.

Phew......................

Still a bit fat, but on the greater scheme of things, i would rather be fat and so much alive, than dead and skinny.

Mark Alexander

before I was a cyclist I was unhappy with life but it cheered me up four years ago. but now... every time i'm off work ad it's raining i get depressed.