The Scottish thread (Too 'ticht' for cake)

pinno
pinno Posts: 51,435
edited September 2012 in The cake stop
How you doin' ya bunch o' chuktas, bampots, skulking loafers, dweebs and skanky scroungers ?!

Fancy a pint o' heavy ? (if you can find the bloody stuff now that pishwater lager import seems to have invaded the place from foreign shores and worse - England).

Can't let the Narden Ireland boys get one up on us, so this oor den of iniquity, sin and frugality. Wahey...
seanoconn - gruagach craic!

Comments

  • john_kline
    john_kline Posts: 2,151
    Rid heided c#nt :D
  • Gazzetta67
    Gazzetta67 Posts: 1,890
    Bawbag
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    John Kline wrote:
    Rid heided c#nt :D

    Oi me ol' mucker - This is a SCOTTISH thread. Get yer own "duckin' and divin', bit of this, bit of that' cockney one".

    (I am a baldy c#nt by the way)
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • t.m.h.n.e.t
    t.m.h.n.e.t Posts: 2,265
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc


    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird
  • Cleat Eastwood
    Cleat Eastwood Posts: 7,508
    My butler says "Excuse me chaps, would you mind awfully keeping the noise down - one's trying to sleep"

    brian%20glover%208x6.jpg
    The dissenter is every human being at those moments of his life when he resigns
    momentarily from the herd and thinks for himself.
  • Omar Little
    Omar Little Posts: 2,010
    awright cuntos
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc

    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird

    As the bearded bloke said in the vid (before you changed the link) "Huh !, The Irish"
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    Cleat Eastwood wrote:
    My butler says "Excuse me chaps, would you mind awfully keeping the noise down - one's trying to sleep"

    brian%20glover%208x6.jpg

    I hope yer Butler chappie has a good dentist. :wink:
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • t.m.h.n.e.t
    t.m.h.n.e.t Posts: 2,265
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc

    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird

    As the bearded bloke said in the vid (before you changed the link) "Huh !, The Irish"
    I didn't change it, I added some Alestorm to it :roll:

    Maybe one day I'll tell you the tale of how i acquired land in Scotland :lol:
  • Redhog14
    Redhog14 Posts: 1,377
    Glad to get some decent patter on here at last, most eh these radges do ma nut in, bunch eh choobs! By the way, Bigman, an aw that, no. But.
    @surroundedbh
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc

    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird

    Maybe one day I'll tell you the tale of how i acquired land in Scotland :lol:

    Aye - bring it on. Tell us how you fleeced some puir blue nosed citizen of his last and you ended up with a midge infested bog ! Then we'll claim oor land back in yer absence (absent landlords - who needs 'em: bunch o' bangers).
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • t.m.h.n.e.t
    t.m.h.n.e.t Posts: 2,265
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc

    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird

    Maybe one day I'll tell you the tale of how i acquired land in Scotland :lol:

    Aye - bring it on. Tell us how you fleeced some puir blue nosed citizen of his last and you ended up with a midge infested bog ! Then we'll claim oor land back in yer absence (absent landlords - who needs 'em: bunch o' bangers).
    I had a pish in a hedge in Airdrie one night :lol::lol::lol:
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    pinarello001 wrote:
    T.M.H.N.E.T wrote:
    Och aye. Tis a fine wee thread laddie.

    http://youtu.be/Tyx0K4WrElo http://youtu.be/CFYEASepPAc

    ps: I technically own a piece of Scotland therefore I am a Laird

    Maybe one day I'll tell you the tale of how i acquired land in Scotland :lol:

    Aye - bring it on. Tell us how you fleeced some puir blue nosed citizen of his last and you ended up with a midge infested bog ! Then we'll claim oor land back in yer absence (absent landlords - who needs 'em: bunch o' bangers).
    I had a pish in a hedge in Airdrie one night :lol::lol::lol:

    Should have pished on Wishaw - what a hole. Oh and Cumbernauld, Dumbarton, East Kilbride...
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • Frank the tank
    Frank the tank Posts: 6,553
    Fair fill your honest sonsee face
    Great chieftain o the pudding race
    Tail end Charlie

    The above post may contain traces of sarcasm or/and bullsh*t.
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    Commander Farquarson Chumley Smythe-Bottom (Sebastian) recently visited the tented infirmary in Helmand Province, Afghanistan. At the end of the visit he enquired about the tent at the bottom of the encampment. The sargeant said in no way should he visit the tent. But Smythe-Bottom did insist and he got his way. There was only 3 'inmates'. When he got to the first man he said 'And how are you doing sir?' to which the reply was 'Ye banks and braes of bonnie doon'. Crickey said Smythe and he wandered to the next bed and asked the same. The reply was 'Aye, all the best laid plans of mice and men'. My god ! said Smythe. He ventured to the next bed tentativeley. 'How are you fine sir?', the reply was similar - 'till al the rocks melt wi the sun'.
    After the visit, Commander Farquarson Chumley Smythe-Bottom commented that he had never witnessed such bad cases of shell shock to which the Sargeant retorted 'Oh no sir, not shell shock: thats the serious Burns unit".

    I'll get ma sporran and bid ye farewell.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • -spider-
    -spider- Posts: 2,548
    Fit like loons?
    -Spider-
  • daviesee
    daviesee Posts: 6,386
    -spider- wrote:
    Fit like loons?
    Foos yer doos?
    None of the above should be taken seriously, and certainly not personally.
  • bompington
    bompington Posts: 7,674
    daviesee wrote:
    -spider- wrote:
    Fit like loons?
    Foos yer doos?
    Doing very well, thankyou
  • mitchell_inman
    mitchell_inman Posts: 101
    -spider- wrote:
    Fit like loons?
    Brand new, pal!

    Embra nightlife documentary - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-CN7TXN8yo
    There's a future for you in the fire escape trade...
  • dw300
    dw300 Posts: 1,642
    Currrrley Wurrrrley!
    All the above is just advice .. you can do whatever the f*ck you wana do!
    Bike Radar Strava Club
    The Northern Ireland Thread
  • dmclite-3.0
    dmclite-3.0 Posts: 845
    Wired tae a mars bar ya bam.

    Right, offski cos some of ya shitebags oan here gie me ra boak, know whit i mean, by the way, no ?

    Big Mad Mental Davy Fae Dreghorn, make nae mistake or I'll put yer gas ata peep, hen.
    I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, but I'm intercontinental when I eat French toast...
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    Wham bar - guaranteed to remove the lining of your mouth before you finish one.
    Then you can talk proper Fyfe - I mean proper ye olde Fyfe: "Mooth cut oot wi' a chisel when he was born" Fyfe speak.
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!
  • thecrofter
    thecrofter Posts: 734
    Frank the tank wrote:
    Fair fa' your honest sonsee face
    Great chieftain o the pudding race
    FTFY, Mick.
    You've no won the Big Cup since 1902!
  • thecrofter
    thecrofter Posts: 734
    Did youse here about the Aberdeen lad who was in the shoe shop and couldnae work out which shoe was left and right, so he says to the assistant "Fit fit fits fit fit"
    You've no won the Big Cup since 1902!
  • Dougall
    Dougall Posts: 49
    Bolt ya rocket. Especially if yer fae Embra.
    This thread is pure durrrty by ra wae
  • mitchell_inman
    mitchell_inman Posts: 101
    Apparently "blootered" - meaning pished - is a new word in the Collins Dictionary on-line.

    I mainly remember it from trying to blooter the ba' when playing fitba'...
    There's a future for you in the fire escape trade...
  • pinno
    pinno Posts: 51,435
    mitchell_inman wrote:
    Apparently "blootered" - meaning pished - is a new word in the Collins Dictionary on-line.

    I mainly remember it from trying to blooter the ba' when playing fitba'...
    The Irish equivalent for blootered is 'Banjaxed', but thats because they are bit odd.

    Local Vernacular (Galloway Irish) is a case in point:
    'Ye'll be fair skunnert when I gie yoo a slap roon the lugs fer ye heecht o' cheek
    seanoconn - gruagach craic!

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