Borderline personality disorder

A close family member has this condition.

Do you have any knowledge / experience, and you want to share?

Thank you very much

Comments

  • First.Aspect
    First.Aspect Posts: 15,253

    Several people I've worked for have been more than borderline, if that helps.

  • Webboo2
    Webboo2 Posts: 570

    I know a fair amount having been a mental health nurse for 30 plus years. However I don’t think a cycling forum is the place to discuss this. I would suggest you request a family meeting with the professionals involved with your relatives care.

  • pep.fermi
    pep.fermi Posts: 369

    Thanks

  • Webboo2
    Webboo2 Posts: 570

    Pep

    Sorry if that came across as a bit abrupt. I’m right in thinking you are not in the UK. If so often diagnostic criteria is different from country to country. USA have a different set of guidelines to the UK which can mean someone gets a diagnosis there but they wouldn’t in the UK.

    Also Personality disorders are a bit controversial in mental health which given that most mental health diagnosis is controversial in some circles means it can get very emotive.

    Personality disorders can be very difficult to treat / offer interventions even if the person is willing to engage with therapy. In NHS mental health service I worked we originally offered generic services to sector of the city. When I left we had split in to a service counselling mild MH issue’s, a Psychosis service and a non Psychosis service ( personality disorders).

    The non Psychosis service had another specialist service attached which was the Psychotherapy team who worked with people with personality disorder. This service had a very long waiting list due to people often being in therapy for a lengthy period.

    UK mental health services are notoriously under funded in a health service that is underfunded. I hope it’s better where you are.

  • pep.fermi
    pep.fermi Posts: 369

    @Webboo2 thanks for replying. I was not offended by your first reply but nonetheless thanks for offering the apologies.

    I find your reply very valuable indeed. Nothing really surprising though. You're right, I'm not in the UK, I happen to be in Germany. I'm not German. Some additional complications I have are language difficulties, and Germany being what it is everything here is additionally complicated.


    In case anyone else is interested in this topic, here some reads I was suggested elsewhere:

    Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents: How to Help Your Child (of Any Age) with Borderline Personality Disorder Without Losing Yourself

    Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder

    And a YouTube video:

    Back From the Edge Borderline Personality Disorder

  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 73,784
    edited May 23

    Yes I would avoid books and youtube videos and leave it to the professionals.

    Not that it helps but my uncle had this and was homeless for 20 years before dying in his 40s - it can be really very tragic, so don't fuck about.

    If you can afford private if that accelerates the process to see professionals I would do that.

    Only thing I'd add is their disorder is not your responsibility - you can help as much as you can for a loved one but ultimately they have to want to have help. My family struggled a lot with guilt and really they did everything a loving family could do.

  • pep.fermi
    pep.fermi Posts: 369

    Thanks for the post

  • Webboo2
    Webboo2 Posts: 570

    I don’t know what the German mental services are like but I wouldn’t be going private in the UK. The NHS might be poor but once you get a crisis the private sector will quickly wash their hands of you.

  • pep.fermi
    pep.fermi Posts: 369

    Thanks everyone for the replies.

    I'm still working hard trying to understand what this condition exactly mean. Extremely confused. Everything I read, or I was told, just makes no sense to me. The only thing I think we as a family are doing ok is trying to keep a functional psychoemotional healthy environment. Other than that, no clue yet what we as individuals, or as a family, can or should do...

  • rick_chasey
    rick_chasey Posts: 73,784
    edited May 25

    Yeah this was the Netherlands. On the other hand, NHS doesn’t seem to have the resources to care unless it is a crisis. 🤷🏻‍♂️

  • Webboo2
    Webboo2 Posts: 570

    Most private health care in the UK is fine as long as it’s routine and everything goes to plan. But as soon as it goes wrong it’s over to the NHS to sort it out. You don’t see private health care companies offering to run A& E services.