Pedaleur de Répulsion
No_Ta_Doctor
Posts: 14,670
As the opposite of the Pedaleur de Charme award (which is for aesthetically pleasing cyclists - those with fluid strokes, low backs and a soupçon of souplesse - it's not about triers, or bravery, or attacking panache) I'd like to open the nominations for Pedaleur de Répulsion. These are the cyclists that are an affront to the aesthetics of the sport. Not because they're born ugly, but because everything they do on a bike just looks wrong. You can have a face only a mother could love and still win the Charme award, and you could have the cheekbones for a cover appearance on a fashion mag and still win the the Répulsion award.
My opening nomination is for Aru, who is a disgrace to the Italian national champions jersey. I don't care that his face would be improved by hitting it with a spade, it's he way he rides that disgusts me. I honestly can't bear to see him in the red, white and green.
Lets face it, when it comes to cycling aesthetics the Italians win hands down. If an Italian can't rock his jersey like this:
Or this:
Or this:
then they should give up and go home.
My opening nomination is for Aru, who is a disgrace to the Italian national champions jersey. I don't care that his face would be improved by hitting it with a spade, it's he way he rides that disgusts me. I honestly can't bear to see him in the red, white and green.
Lets face it, when it comes to cycling aesthetics the Italians win hands down. If an Italian can't rock his jersey like this:
Or this:
Or this:
then they should give up and go home.
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Hand slinging off your rival...Changing gear with your hand...Class!
I always manage to spot Hesink in a group of riders, another true 'bikefighter'.Half man, Half bike0 -
Latour, aru, froome, cadel. Probably missed a few.
Voeckler!!Team My Man 2018: David gaudu, Pierre Latour, Romain Bardet, Thibaut pinot, Alexandre Geniez, Florian Senechal, Warren Barguil, Benoit Cosnefroy0 -
I always thought Dan Martin is unweildly He looks like my recurring dream where I can't cycle because the pedals don't go round in an expected manner
I can't remember if Landis pedalled crap or not but I always think yes because I hated him on a bike
Riis with that stupid gurn and big gear rotation Repulsive0 -
Chris Anke Sorenson or Chris Horner are up there along with Froome and TV Tommy of course.0
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Possibly controversial, but I'm going to add Contador - purely for his TTing. He shuffles on his saddle like a dog cleaning it's arse on the grass.Warning No formatter is installed for the format0
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In much the same way as Chris Anker Sorensen and Dan Martin make the selection due to their horrific bobbing up and down... lets also not forget the atrocious style of Mollema.**************************************************
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Contador looks pretty cool climbing out of the saddle though.0
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Pozzovivo. I know he's one of MY MEN but he looks like he's mashing potatoes with his pedal mashing.Correlation is not causation.0
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Paco "Quasimodo" Mancebo.
Sadly, Mauricio Soler. Another all arms and legs man.
Fernando Escartin."Science is a tool for cheaters". An anonymous French PE teacher.0 -
Mollema looked like a python on his TT bike today, was rank.Saracen Tenet 3 - 2015 - Dead - Replaced with a Hack Frame
Voodoo Bizango - 2014 - Dead - Hit by a car
Vitus Sentier VRS - 20170 -
Dirk De Wolf - LBL winner, 1992.
Cool name, appalling pedalling style.
Un candidate pour le title "Pedaleur de Repulsion"!
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prawny wrote:Mollema looked like a python on his TT bike today, was rank.
Mollema is not a pretty sight full-stop. But you are right that he looks like a snake, I could never figure out what it was about the way he moves that bothered me but that is it.Correlation is not causation.0 -
andyp wrote:
Oh come on the dude is lost in the roadside moment, give him a break.Correlation is not causation.0 -
Ilnur Zakarin and his weird, spidery froome-like arms greatly disturbs me.0
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*shudder*0 -
Aru's 'givin it some' uphill looks like he stepped out of Belleville Rendezvous. Only in BV it looked good, Aru just looks awful.
The fact that Aru can look so bloomin awful on a bike disproves the hypothesis (somewhere up there ^ ) that Italians are the epitomy of suave sophistication en velo.0 -
Anyone who can make it through the HC climbs with the big boys and then ends up in a sprint finish. Even the ones who normally look okay on a bike. All the energy they're putting out ends up frantically trying to escape in whichever direction is most convenient, presumably out of pure embarrassment for being associated with the whole farrago.0
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Ha, that sprint finish into Chambery was the epitomy of that. Someone described Froome as "looking like he was leading himself out"0
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prawny wrote:B3rnieMac wrote:Ilnur Zakarin and his weird, spidery froome-like arms greatly disturbs me.
Zakarin and Aru earlier today
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Jens Voigt was never able to ride in a straight line... front wheel in and out. And, then he had his knees pointing out at right angles: simply horrific.**************************************************
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Another vote for Aru from me.
He looks like he is wrestling.0 -
From the current crop: Aru, Martin, Mollema, Voeckler (or is he historic now?) and of course Froome
From the past: Mancebo - rode with his head sidewaysIt's a little like wrestling a gorilla. You don't quit when you're tired. You quit when the gorilla is tired.0 -
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Oy laat Laurens alleen.Correlation is not causation.0
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Just a reminder, this isn't about having good looks. You can have the face of Adonis himself and still look like a sack of potatoes on a bike. Conversely, you can have a face that scares babies and causes grown men to look away and still look like elegance personified when you start to pedal.Warning No formatter is installed for the format0
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My Fav description of Va va Froomedog "Like an octopus shagging a washing machine".Superstition sets the whole world in flames; philosophy quenches them.
Voltaire0