What Would You Do?

Up in Shoreditch this morning, road splits left & right and I want to go left. Licenced mini-cab people carrier just around the corner, so slow down behind him, then made to overtake and he moves out, so went to undertake and he went left. Its almost as if he wanted to block me or stop me passing. Looked through the back and saw him pressing buttons on his PDA/SatNav. He's obviously not paying attention to the road as he continues to weave, so when safe I overtake wide and as I did, slap his wing mirror to "wake him up".
He chases me down the road, so to avoid getting knocked off, I pull over and get off my bike. Driver jumps out and rants/raves/swears at me for touching his car for the next 5 or 6 minutes. He wouldn't have it that his driving was dangerous to other road users but continued to shout, threaten and wag his finger in my face. I let him rant until he ran out of steam...
What would you guys have done in the same situation?
I'm not violent in as much as I won't damage someone's car or hit them but if someone drives in a way that nearly causes them to knock me off, I will slap their car or shout at them to get their attention to what they're doing. Or as per another thread, grab their keys & lob them across the road.
He chases me down the road, so to avoid getting knocked off, I pull over and get off my bike. Driver jumps out and rants/raves/swears at me for touching his car for the next 5 or 6 minutes. He wouldn't have it that his driving was dangerous to other road users but continued to shout, threaten and wag his finger in my face. I let him rant until he ran out of steam...
What would you guys have done in the same situation?
I'm not violent in as much as I won't damage someone's car or hit them but if someone drives in a way that nearly causes them to knock me off, I will slap their car or shout at them to get their attention to what they're doing. Or as per another thread, grab their keys & lob them across the road.
1997 Gary Fisher Big Sur
2009 Scott Spark 60
2010 Ghost 5000
2011 Commencal Ramones AL1
2012 Commencal Meta AM1
2009 Scott Spark 60
2010 Ghost 5000
2011 Commencal Ramones AL1
2012 Commencal Meta AM1
0
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2009 Scott Spark 60
2010 Ghost 5000
2011 Commencal Ramones AL1
2012 Commencal Meta AM1
I remember taking the physical route once and got a right pasting.
2016 Santa Cruz 5010
2016 Genesis Croix de Fer
Kona Paddy Wagon
Canyon Roadlite Al 7.0 - reborn as single speed!
Felt Z85 - mangled by taxi.
I usually rant back in similar situations which probably doesn't help. I did once really wind up a particular twunt by pretending I'd phoned the police and telling him to wait until they arrived. I'd actually phoned my boss to say I'd be late. He was annoyed because I'd gesticulated with a loosely clenched fist as he was texting. I wound him up further by repeatedly calling him a [email protected] He went from threatening to run me over to apologising for being a [email protected] as I wouldn't let him leave without admitting to being one. Took about 15 minutes but definitely gave a sense of satisfaction.
Marin Nail Trail
Cotic Solaris
Specialising in Git Daaahns and Cafs. Norvern Munkey/Transplanted Laaandoner.
I imagine they gave him employee of the week
Boardman Hybrid Team 2014
Not have slapped his wing mirror in the first place.
Or at least done it where there was no risk of him chasing me i.e. in built up traffic, not somewhere where he's free to catch me up/run me down.
Another alternative is to open the rear near-side door and then just ride off. Not so easy these days with central locking but if it opens it does force them to stop, get out of the car and walk around it to close it before getting back in thus allowing you to make your getaway.
Oh Axel, you card.
Actually does putting a banana in the exhaust disable a car?
Felt Z6 2012
Red Arthur Caygill steel frame
Tall....
www.seewildlife.co.uk
If you do smack his car and he stops then state clearly he hit you, just keep saying that and add that you are going to report him to the police.
That might defuse the situation, and has done for me.
Reporting him won't get you anywhere if you weren't hurt in the incident.
I've learnt this the hard way!
Another one is to remain perfectly calm, stare them down and say "get back in your car and jog on before you get hurt".
A bit of a bluff, but again has worked for me.
D-Locking the git is a last resort and going to get you grief of another sort.
The best and most obvious solution is to just let it wash over you and keep going, but it is hard.
(In a car related incident I did jump on someone's bonnet kick the windscreen in and attempt to drag him out of the opening.
All that got me was a caution at the nick.
Was it worth it?
Yes, as a learning curve because it taught me what I am capable of and that it could have ended a lot worse for me if I hadn't been dragged off by an off duty cop. (He was sympathetic, told me what to say at the nick which made it easier for me).
Since then I have tried to be calmer as if I had carried on like that I would have eventually killed someone!
You can report him to his company, but chances are they won't give a toss, as they are biased against cyclists as a category...
Curious to know what you do say at the nick. Might come in handy one day....
Cannondale CAADX
Charge Plug 1
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
If I ever meet Snakebite the 2nd in real life be very polite.
Nobody ask what happened to Snakebite the 1st.
Seriously now, I'd love to know what they told you to say at the nick.
Marin Nail Trail
Cotic Solaris
On whether reporting does any good: on an individual case, probably not, but if one driver keeps popping up again and again then he will become a problem to his or her employer regardless of their views on cycling. If you don't report it, then it definitely won't go any further.
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition
I can tell you, but then I'd have to kill you
What happened was that a car undertook me, clipped the kerb, came back out, hit me and sent both of us down a grass bank. I managed to stay on the bank, but he spun twice on the southbound carriageway and came to rest on the other hard shoulder.
After checking the wife and daughter were ok I just flipped.
The officer, who saw what happened, told me to say I was in shock, didn't realise what I was doing (not a million miles away from the truth) and that I was very, very sorry.
Him having a word with the attending officers also helped I think.
I do tend to flare up very quickly when I feel threatened, I fight rather than flee, but come back down just as quickly.
I'm not keen on people abusing my property/car, and would be rather annoyed to say the least, however if it was my fault I'd put my hands up.
Whilst driving I cannot stand idiots, but I also make mistakes and will always apologise to the other driver.
Admittedly it did take time to learn to do this, because when I was younger I was perfect in every way and it was always someone else's fault, but as I got older I like to think I got wiser................
Marin Nail Trail
Cotic Solaris
You actually have to make an airtight seal but it should do. Exhaust needs to get away from the engine but if the passageway is blocked then its got nowhere to go and the engine will stall.
2009 Scott Spark 60
2010 Ghost 5000
2011 Commencal Ramones AL1
2012 Commencal Meta AM1
Mythbusters etc proved bananas/potatoes wouldn't be sufficent to create the seal and withstand with the buildup of pressure
without being expelled. If you put bananas or potatoes in the exhaust and it forms an initial seal you're more likely to injure any following cyclists when the object is shot out the exhaust.
"Don't be silly son, you're a bloke, you'll never grow up"
Quite. Although I think there's some space between tapping a window and abusing property. The one guy I did it to - tapped a door panel rather than a window -reacted as though I'd touched something much more personal. You never know quite how much of a nutter someone might be.
Pinnacle Monzonite
Part of the anti-growth coalition
True dat
Rule #9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
Rule #12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
Rule #42 // A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.